Lost
by LordofAmus
Summary: Ludwig finds himself fighting against the person he cares for the most after that person snaps because of him. GerIta, USUK, FrUK, Spamano and PruHun. Contains some mild yaoi and character death. Don't like, don't read.
1. Chapter 1

**Lost. Chapter 1**

**Rating:**T

**Warning:** Mild yaoi, character death and violence(Lots of blood).

**Pairings:**GerIta, Spamano, USUK, FrUK and PruHun.

**Human names:** Ludwig- Germany  
>Feliciano- N. Italy.<br>Alfred- America  
>Romano- S. Italy<p>

**A/N:** Hello guys! Thank you for viewing my first Hetalia story! Sorry, I've had a bunch of stories in my iPod and I never got around to posting it. I just wanted to post the first chapter to see if you guys would like it. I still need to plan the entire thing but I can promise you there is a lot of action in here! So the speed I update depends on reviews (Just a little encouragement, da?) Thanks for reading! ^J^

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the songs used in the fanfiction.

_Cannot touch, cannot hold  
>Cannot be together<br>Cannot love, cannot kiss,  
>Cannot have each other<br>_

_Must be strong, and we must let go  
>Cannot say what our hearts must know<br>How can I not love you?  
>What do I tell my heart?<br>When do I not want you here in my arms?  
>How does one waltz away from all of the memories?<br>How do I not miss you when you are gone?  
><em>

_Cannot dream, Cannot share,  
>Sweet and tender moments<br>Cannot feel how we feel,  
>Must pretend it's over<br>_

_Must be brave, and we must go on  
>Must not say what we've known all along<br>How can I not love you?  
>What do I tell my heart?<br>When do I not want you here in my arms?  
>How does one waltz away from all of the memories?<br>How do I not miss you when you are gone?  
>How can I not love you?<br>_

_Must be brave, and we must be strong  
>Cannot say what we've known all along<br>How can I not love you?  
>What do I tell my heart?<br>When do I not want you here in my arms?  
>How does one waltz away from all of the memories?<br>How do I not miss you when you are gone?  
><em>

_How can I not love you when you are gone?_

Lyrics to How Can I Not Love You by Joy Enriquez

There were some things that are as simple as black and white; the moon, trees, grass. They were always there and were unappreciated.

They were the things that you always had but took for granted. People see them everyday but never really appreciate them.

Italy was the same. Germany had never thought about what life without the carefree Italian would be like. He loved having his little Italy around but he could never tell the carefree man how he felt. What was the need when they had forever? He was so used to having Feliciano around that he never considered what would happen if the Italian left. That's why the day Feliciano betrayed him, the life he had built after World War II crashed down.

A groan echoed in the small, dim room. Ludwig's eyes fluttered open. He blinked his eyes a few times, a vain attempt to chase away the drowsiness he felt. He felt a warm, sticky substance on the top of his head. He instantly identified it as blood since he was familiar with the feeling of blood on his body from all the years of war.

He looked around the dim room. As his eyes adjusted to the light he could make out a door at the other end of the room. For the first time he realized he was tied to a pole behind his back. He tried recalling the events prior in his head but much to his frustration, he couldn't. He couldn't remember any of the events leading up to his capture. He could feel it on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't remember where he had been or who he had been with. Who would want to capture him? It had been years since the end of World War II. Sure, some people still held some grudges against Germany and Hitler was still hated by many people all over the world but he couldn't think of any countries that would do this to him.

His next thoughts ways to escape. He couldn't reach the pocket knife he always had on him and he couldn't break his bonds that were rubbing his wrists raw.

The door groaned loudly as a man stepped in, his booted feet echoing into the room. Ludwig looked up, his heart quickened as he recognized the man.

"Feli!" he exclaimed joyfully. Feliciano Vargas, North Italy had been his close friend since World War I when Germany found him in a tomato box. Feliciano was kind hearted and would help anyone if he could, even if it was his enemy. He was an artist and trader, not a fighter though, but he was skilled at running and escaping. Feliciano would break him out of here and maybe he could tell him what happened.

Even in the dim light, Ludwig could see Feliciano's smirk. Ludwig's eyes furrowed together. The smirk looked so alien on Feliciano's face that usually harbored his trademark closed eyed grin.

"Feli, what are you doing?" Ludwig asked as Feliciano stepped calmly towards the vulnerable German. An icy laugh echoed in the dark room. Chills raced up Ludwig's spine. Germany's eyebrows knitted together further.

"You always were an oblivious fool, worse then Alfred sometimes. Do you not remember?" Feliciano asked coldly, his voice heavy in that cute Italian accent. Germany shook his head. Feliciano crouched down in front of Germany talking Ludwig's chin in his gloved hand. Ludwig blushed at their close proximity, "We met at the cafe." Feliciano stopped to let Ludwig think. That was all that Italy needed to say. The events suddenly rushed back into Ludwig's head.

Looking down at the laminated menu, Ludwig quickly translated the Italian as he waited for the personification of Italy. Italian was such a strange language sometimes. He heard rapid footsteps of boots on cobblestone and looked up.

Feliciano quickly ran towards him, his russet hair swaying in rhythm to his footsteps. Seeing Feliciano's hair being swept off of his face took Ludwig's breath away. The Italian truly was breathtaking. Feliciano had a thin build. He was a runner and a strong, prosperous country. He didn't have the muscles or strength that Germany or America had but he had muscles in all the right places and Germany could sense his inner strength.

Feliciano's was always bright, even when he was sad. He had a certain way of looking adorable no matter what he was doing. He had fair, tan skin and bright brown eyes. He always seemed to be smiling or laughing. He loved to bounce around and eat pasta or hug Ludwig, Japan or his _fratello_.

"Ludwig! I'm sorry I'm so late! Romano yelled at me again!" Feliciano said as he sat down. Ludwig remained stotic. Curse that Romano always yelling at his sweet little brother.

"Just try to be more on time next time." Ludwig said sternly. Wait, what? That's not what Ludwig wanted to say at all! Feliciano nodded silently looking like a beaten puppy. Ludwig wanted to hug the Italian, make him smile and apologize for being so harsh but his mouth wouldn't form words. Ludwig sighed and read through the menu again, trying to decide on pizza or pasta.

Germany and Feliciano had finished eating their meals quickly. .

"Ve~ pasta's delicious!" the Italian said. Ludwig allowed a small smile. He loved seeing the Italians smile. It was contagious. It could easily brighten a room.

"Italian food is delicious." Ludwig said. Italy face lit up like a young child at Christmas. Ludwig's heart fluttered slightly. He blushed and looked away. Why couldn't he always make the Italian smile like that? All he had to do was say one nice thing. Wait…Why was he feeling like this? He shouldn't have these kinds of feelings for another man, should he?

"Ludwig?" Feliciano asked. Germany blinked to clear his thoughts and looked up at the Italian.

"Ja?" he said. Feliciano frowned slightly.

"I said I'd be right back. I have to use the restroom." Feliciano said. Ludwig nodded, blinking in surprise that he missed the Italians statement.

"Alright, I'll be right here." Ludwig said. Feliciano smiled as he stood up and disappeared inside the quaint cafe. It was pretty empty at the moment. It seemed a little strange to Ludwig especially since they were in Italy but that means he just had less people around which was fine by him.

Ludwig tried to distract himself from thinking of the handsome Italian. He thought back to what he was going to present at the World Conference coming up. No doubt, it would be the only sensible one. No one else ever came up with rational ideas.

Before Ludwig ever had time to react or even grasp what was happening, he was thrown to the ground by a blast, bits of rock and dust raining down on him. He heard voices screaming and crying around him. A large chunk of rock struck his head. /Feli!/ Ludwig thought before the suffocating darkness closed around him, wrapping him tightly in it's icy clutches.

"Feliciano! Thank Gott your ok! I thought something horrible happened to you!" Ludwig exclaimed straining against the ties to get closer to his friend he thought he had lost.

There was no trace of a smile on Feliciano's face. "Shut up!" he growled. Ludwig froze. Did Feliciano just say that? He never thought in his wildest dreams that Feliciano could say something so coldly and heartlessly.

"Wha-?" Ludwig asked. He was cut short by a hard slap to the face. He was dumbstruck for a moment before he realized Feliciano had slapped him. Reeling back, hurt flashed through him but not because of the slap. What was happening to his pasta loving Feli? Feliciano roughly grabbed Germanys face and forced him to look into his caramel colored eyes. No! No no,no! This was wrong! This wasn't his Feli! This is all just a dream! Ludwig's own blue eyes widened to see the anger in the Italians eyes.

"I said shut up!" Feliciano yelled squeezing Ludwig's sore face tightly. Ludwig looked at the Italian in confusion. The wheels in his mind were spinning rapidly, trying to make sense of the sudden change in his carefree Italian. Italy let go of his face and stood up.

"You really are stupid!_ I_planted the bomb! I never went to the bathroom and I was never late because Romano yelled at me!" Feliciano yelled motioning with his hands. Ludwig's jaw gaped. H...His Feli set off the bomb? His Feli had captured him? Oh Gott, why would Feli do it? What was happening? Why would Feli do that? Why would Feli want to hurt him? Why would he bomb a restaurant in his own country?

"Heh, you didn't expect that did you? Don't say anything. I don't want to hear your stupid voice!" Feliciano said harshly. Ludwig felt his heart being crushed in his chest. His heart beat quickened, pounding against his chest so loudly he was sure Feliciano could hear it.

"I've waited so long for this moment. You and all your buddies will pay for yelling at me and bullying me for all those years!" Feliciano said. Guilt quickly washed over Ludwig.

"Feli, I..." Ludwig said. Before Ludwig could blink, Feliciano had a knife pressed up against Ludwig's throat with a quickness and swiftness that Ludwig didn't know Feliciano had. He immediately shut up, his eyes widening in surprise.

"I told you to shut up! I don't care what you have to say so don't say a word or I'll slice your throat up like a pig, you understand?" Italy hissed looking intensely into Germanys eyes. A cold feeling took over Ludwig's heart realizing that Feliciano was serious. He nodded slightly, his shoulders slumping.

"Good boy." Feliciano said drawing back the knife. "Don't even bother with screaming. No one will hear you!" he said. He turned and left the room as quickly as he had come. With the door shut Ludwig slumped, his head hanging in guilt, shame and sadness. Oh dear Gott, how long had Feliciano been like this inside? How long had he been harboring those murderous feelings for him? How could Ludwig have been so blind? How could he not have seen what the Italian had been hiding? He always thought Feliciano was easy to read, wearing all his emotions on his face. He had been wrong, dead wrong. His Feli, his poor Feli that he thought he had known was gone and it was all his fault for not showing him how he felt.

Ludwig's stomach churned suddenly and next thing he knew, he got sick. He didn't care though. He only wanted the old Feliciano back, _his_Feliciano.

**A/N:** Hi! I never realized how cool national anthems are. I started listening to a few. I laughed my butt off when I listened to England's, it sounded so much like America the Beautiful. I can so Iggy getting ticked at Alfred. Lol XD I'm gonna try to squeeze that in here. Maybe on the third chapter. Lol. What really bothered me though is all the nasty comments. French and English people going back and forth, Americans calling Germans Nazi's and Germans calling Americans fat. Isn't that a little childish? Those things are all in our past now. I can understand if you're upset about some current issues but you don't need to take it out on an entire nationality. Seriously though guys, go check it out. They're really cool.

The next chapter will be from Feliciano's point of view. Please R&R! It'll make me write faster!


	2. Chapter 2

Lost. Chapter 2

A/N: Yay! Second chapter! Woot! Please read and review! 

Italy's POV

Waiting. Patience. Careful planning. Considering all possibilities. Determination to finish the plans. Italy did all of these things. For years he stayed silent, pretending to be his old self. Yes, he really had been carefree and happy once. Back when he used to be called Chibitalia. Holy Rome had been around then and had been Chibitalia's best friend. He had been kind to him and had kissed him when he left for war. Feliciano had been devastated when he died. He felt as if he had lost the love of his life and perhaps he had.

Then Ludwig came. Ludwig didn't kiss him when he left for war. Instead, he drug Feliciano out to war with him. Feliciano hated the idea of killing an innocent person. What had that person ever done to him? All these humans only had one life. It was the countries that were cruel to each other. Shouldn't they just fight between themselves and leave the humans out of it.

Eventually, Feliciano became immune to killing humans. He got used to it so it didn't seem like such a big deal anymore. Yet he didn't show it. He continued to act like he hated to kill, that he didn't know how to fire a gun and that he only knew how to beg for his life during a war. Ludwig only yelled at him, chastised him for not being a good soldier. Feliciano tried his best to please him but his best wasn't enough for Ludwig. Slowly, the other countries came to pick on him and call him names. Ludwig would try to protect him when Feliciano around but he would always call Feliciano names behind his back.

Feliciano had loved Ludwig. He used to love to make him smile and on rare occasions, laugh. What was that saying he heard once? You always want what you can't have? Yeah that was it. His love for the German quickly changed to hate and then to loathing him when Ludwig would yell at him or call him names. Each time Ludwig would take hits at him, it slowly pushed Feliciano towards his ultimatum, wearing down on him and cutting his heart. Ludwig never knew how much each word would affect Feliciano, filling him with an empty cold feeling. Each night, those words seemed to echo in Feliciano's dreams, haunting him. Whoever said sleep was bliss was a liar. Feliciano didn't get a break from the other countries; not after meetings, not in his mind and not even in his sleep.

Yet Feliciano didn't let on to anything. He endured all the pain silently, not saying anything of what he had to deal with every single day and night. He just smiled and laughed and yelled for pasta like he usually would. No one could even sense a flicker of the pain the small Italian harbored. Everyone just assumed that since he smiled he was all right but Feliciano knew he was far from alright. How many people just smiled empty smiles? How many people didn't notice those empty smiles? And how many people died, killed themselves, because someone did not notice their empty smiles.

More then once, Feliciano had considered killing himself. The one night he had even taken a knife and slit his wrists. Much to his dismay, the wound hadn't been deep enough and he lived. He hadn't been able to do it. Recovering from the wound had hurt to much, caused him too much stress. He had to wear long sleeves during the hot summer days. He couldn't go swimming in the beach or tanning at his house. He had to make sure no one would notice, even though they probably wouldn't have said anything even if they saw it.

The scar was still prominent on his tan skin. The long line ran horizontal across his wrists. It was an ugly white color, standing out against his Mediterranean tan skin. It was like a daily reminder of his mistakes. He knew killing yourself was the wrong thing to do. You only had one life so why not live it. The more he thought about what he had in life the more he thought about how he should deal with the other countries. At first he considered confronting them about how he felt but that was such a womanly thing to do. The countries would only most likely to make fun of him more make Ludwig embarrassed to be around him.

Then, he thought that he should come up with a plan to get revenge for all the horrible things they've done to him. He thought about spreading rumors of them around but that wouldn't give him the sweet feeling of revenge. He wanted them to feel the pain he felt and the only way to do that was cause them physical pain. And thus, his idea was born.

Feliciano knew what he was doing was wrong, yet he did it anyway. He craved for revenge, to make them feel what he felt his entire existence. He couldn't call it a life since he didn't have anyone to live for. If he died, everyone would be happy that Feliciano was gone since they wouldn't have to worry about him any more.

Eventually, Feliciano decided he had enough of the teasing. As he lay in his bed after crying he decided enough was enough. _I should make everyone go through the pain they made me go through. _He roughly came up with several ideas in his head and spent many hours, weeks, months, even years to perfect his plan. That was the last night he cried because of the other countries.

Finally he set the bomb in a cafe in his own country. Yes, in his own country. He had felt a slight twinge and then burning sensation in his chest as it went off a few blocks from where he was standing after he had sneaked out of the back door when he went to use the bathroom. It was better to plant it in his own country. That way if Ludwig did happen to escape from him, the German man wouldn't know where to hide. Eventually, Feliciano would find him and punish him.

He walked back to the cafe, ignoring the cries and screams of his people around him. What did a couple mortals matter to him anyway? They would just die anyway so why not save them for the inevitable pain they would feel later in life. He stood over top of Ludwig's unconscious body, blood and dirt messing up his carefully slicked back blond hair. He smirked, power suddenly racing through him. He could do anything he wanted to Ludwig. He could kill him right here and right now. His finger tips itches to wrap themselves around his neck to choke the life from him, watching as all the life slowly ebbed from his body. He burned to see the look in Ludwig's blue eyes as he realized his betrayal. But what fun would that be? He had to stick to his carefully thought out plan. He couldn't kill him yet, but he certainly could beat him _As Ludwig always said, discipline is always key to a well run organization. _Hmm, Ludwig actually was useful for once.

Bending down, Feliciano picked Ludwig up and unceremoniously threw him over his shoulder not caring if it hurt the German. That was another thing he hid well. None of the other nations had an idea of how strong, swift and graceful he really was. He sometimes gave Ludwig a taste of his true speed during training when Ludwig would threaten him with no dinner if he didn't hurry up. Then, Italy ran so fast that Ludwig didn't stand a chance of catching up. Feliciano always secretly hoped that for once Ludwig would compliment him and tell him he did a good job. To his disappointment, Ludwig always found something to yell at him about like that he could stop running since he ran enough. That stupid German was just jealous at his speed.

Coming back to reality, Feliciano roughly sat Ludwig down on the hard concrete with his back to Feliciano's car. He took the thick sting of rope he had put in his pocket and tightly tied his ankles and wrists together. He then threw Ludwig in the back of his car, out of sight of anyone and threw a blanket over his body. Another one of his favorite rules; always have a backup plan.

Feliciano calmly got in the drivers seat. He smoothed his hair, avoiding the curl and looked in the mirror with a sadistic smile and adjusted it so he could keep an eye on Ludwig, not like he expected him to wake up but you should always be prepared for the impossible.

Feliciano drove down the street as fire trucks headed towards the cafe he had been at. The burn in his chest died down and he knew the fire trucks were putting the fire out. He didn't care about the pain it caused him; he was used to pain. If you wanted to achieve something you had to be willing to get your hands dirty.

Feliciano drove him to a secret military building where his army was helping him to 'conquer' his fellow nations. He had been able to trick them into believing that he wanted to expand Italy and that Germany was a threat to them. It hadn't been easy but Feliciano had learned that the things you want in life don't come easily. He wouldn't have to be careful to hide anything from his officials. In fact, his officials had given him orders to capture Ludwig and to keep him prisoner.

He took him to a room below ground. It was small, dark and dirty. Just the place to hide Ludwig; leave him here to think of all the horrible things he's done. Make him feel cold like how he made Italy feel.

Feliciano dragged Ludwig into the small cell. He untied Ludwig's hands then retied them behind the pole. Feliciano straightened up and looked at Ludwig. Ludwig's face was hanging limp, stray hairs hanging in front of his face. Feliciano frowned as hatred bubbled in him. Why should he be able to have such an innocent face despite all those horrible things he made Feliciano feel? Feliciano suddenly wiped a knife from his pocket and pressed it to Ludwig's face wanting to carve him up like a pumpkin. He stopped. No matter how much he tried to deny it he still had feelings for the German. He couldn't just cut Ludwig when he was asleep. He wanted to have fun with him first. He wanted his revenge, he wanted Ludwig to realize all the pain he caused him and maybe even have Ludwig notice his strength. His hand trembled and he sighed. He also had a plan to stick to and this wasn't part of it. He withdrew the knife and returned it to its case. He sighed; he'll just have to settle for kicks and punches.

"You're lucky this time. One of these days you won't be so lucky." he growled, getting off the cold floor and leaving the room.

Feliciano walked out of the room smirking. The way Ludwig had looked at him with such relief as he walked into the room was priceless. He really did wish he had a camera. He watched, laughing in his mind, as Ludwig's face changed from joy, to confusion then to horror. The look of pure horror and sadness made Feliciano want to laugh. But he had to keep his cool, not let all the power go to his head. He did enjoy the way Ludwig looked when he pressed the knife to his neck, not that he had planned to actually cut him. Truly priceless.

He wanted this feeling to last forever. This feeling of power and strength pulsed through his body; sharpening his senses and making him feel high. This feeling was his own personal drug. He loved the feeling of it and longed for it when it was gone. Maybe if he beat Ludwig, he could feel that more often and he could release some steam of the vulnerable German. He smirked as he walked back to his temporary room on the base where he could get some work done and prepare for the next step of his plan.

A/N: Wow, I'm surprised how easy it was for me to write this. This chapter really freaked me out for some reason. I enjoyed writing it though. Thank you so much for the reviews and all the favorites! It really meant a lot! I don't usually get that kind of come back from the anime I usually like to write in. *coughs* Chrono Crusade *coughs*. Anyway, thanks for the reviews and please keep reviewing! The more reviews there are the quicker I'll post!


	3. Chapter 3

**Lost. Chapter 3**

**A/N:** I got a good part of the story planned now and I'm super excited! BTW, this chapter includes a big of history accuracy and inaccuracy. I wanted to try and include some history but I also wanted to add some things pertaining Gilbert so I put some stuff that I'm not sure is accurate or not. Ok, anyways, onward and upward!

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or its characters.

_Ludwig's POV_

  
>Hours. Days. Weeks. Months. Maybe years. Ludwig couldn't tell how much time had passed. Everything seemed to pass in a daze. He had been stuck in the room with his hands tied to the post for what seems like forever. His wrists were just about rubbed raw, his back and neck hurt and he was numb in some places he didn't want to think about. He barely was aware of the pain he felt physically.<p>

His chest hurt more then anything. He had often felt this feeling before whenever Italy came down with a cold or whenever he would get hurt. Back then it had been a dull pain. Now it was sharp and constantly there. No matter how much he tried to think about something else his thoughts returned to Italy. He felt so guilty for hurting Feliciano for all those years. He was sure that Feliciano would have noticed if something was wrong with him even if he tried to hide it. Feliciano had always been so considerate for other people. Or at least Ludwig thought he had been.

Now he wondered how much of his life had been a lie. Back in World War II, Hitler had told him that he would create a better, stronger and cleaner Germany. Germany and his people had believed him. They were a broken country, having already lost World War I. Hitler promised change and prosperity. Then he changed. Things starting turning from bad to worse. Millions of German citizens were taken from their homes and killed.

Feliciano had been with Ludwig for most of the war. Feliciano had left him to join the allies but if Ludwig had been Feliciano he would have left himself too. When the war had been over Feliciano came back eventually. He had helped Ludwig get over the loss of the war and when Gilbert had ceased to exist as a country. Luckily, the older German brother was still alive but he wasn't a country.

Ludwig's thoughts drifted to his _bruder_. Gilbert enjoyed bugging Ludwig, Roderick and Elizabetha. Now that he wasn't a country he had even more time to bug them. Ludwig and Gilbert were a lot closer then they appeared. Most of Ludwig's childhood memories included the older albino. Whether it was Gilbert playing with Ludwig, getting drunk, or protecting Ludwig from other countries, Gilbert was around almost all the time. Gilberts loud laugh and proclaims of being awesome appeared to annoy Ludwig but ever since Prussia's dissolution, Ludwig would enjoy to hear his _bruder_. It reminded him of how lucky he was that the Prussian was still around.

Even as Ludwig thought of Gilbert, Feliciano wandered his way into Ludwig's thoughts. The ache in his chest that had lessened when thinking of his _bruder_, increased sharply when the image of the smiling Italian flashed into his mind.

Ludwig was like a zombie. He just stared at the floor in shock, his cyan eyes dull and unfocused. He wanted his Feli, the old Feli. This thing wasn't Feliciano. It was just a monster that had destroyed his Feliciano, morphing his sweet mind into a dangerous weapon. All Ludwig had to do was find Feli deep inside him and bring him out. It couldn't be too hard...right?

It might not be hard if Feliciano actually came to see him but he only came around once a week and during those times he would beat Ludwig.

Ludwig anticipated and dreaded his visits. Just a look at Feliciano comforted Ludwig's nerves but also chilled him, making him feel cold and empty. Feliciano changed so much in a short bit of time that Ludwig struggled to grasp it. Those warm, sparkling chocolate eyes he used love were now cold and furious. Just the sight of Ludwig seemed to anger the Italian, sending him into a fury of punches, kicks and screams.

"How dare you? How dare you treat me so badly! I hate you! _I hate you_! I want to kill you!" Feliciano screamed as he kicked Ludwig's chest with the tip of his boot, driving all the breath from Ludwig's battered body. He punched Ludwig's face and stomach with leather gloved hands.

Ludwig's head was hanging down, his now messy and bloody blond hair hanging in his face like a mop. His body was slumped against the pole, weak from pain and deprivement of food. He moaned weakly, lifting his head to look up at Feliciano with sad, bruised blue eyes. One of his eyes was almost swollen shut. Blood leaked from deep lacerations on his cheek and forehead, mixing with dirt and running down his face and neck. His breathing came as a shallow wheeze as he struggled to focus on Feliciano. Feliciano stared down at him with a look of pure hatred and disgust.

"Heh, look how pathetic you are! Where's the strong Germany you always brag about? Who's weak now?" Feliciano demanded, obviously not expecting or wanting an answer. When Ludwig coughed harshly, spitting a few drops of scarlet blood Feliciano chuckled coldly. "Look how far you fell. How pathetic." he said. He spit to his side, his face twisting in disgust as he stared at Ludwig.

Ludwig blinked his eyes, keeping his eyes shut for a couple long moments. He looked back up at Feliciano. "Fe...li..." he groaned weakly and grimaced in pain. "Please...stop. I want the old Feli back."

Feliciano's eyes quickly filled in cold anger. He slapped Ludwig across his bruised and bloodied face. "Don't lie to me! I know what you said bout me behind my back! I know what you really feel and I'm tired of your lies. Your Feli is dead, long dead. This is me, has been me. You're all just too blind to notice anything!" Feliciano fumed.

"I'm s...sorry, Fe...li! I love you, I always have. Please le-" Ludwig was cut off by a furious Feliciano.

"Shut up! Do you ever listen to me? I said I'm tired of your lies so..." he paused to kick Ludwig. "...stop..." he kicked him again. "...lying..." and again. "...to..." and again. "...me!" and again. Ludwig was left feeling winded. He trembled, spitting out more blood. He closed his eyes, struggling to hang onto consciousness. His body was now thin and broken. He was only fed once every two days and was given a small pale of water once a day. On top of that, some of the deep scratches on his face were probably infected. Everything was taking it's tole on his body. He found himself hallucinating things at random times of the day.

He looked up, his vision doubling and blurring. Italy's form blurred to a dark navy blob as Ludwig's head bobbed up and down, unable to summon the strength to keep his head steady. When he looked back up he saw Feliciano's kind brown eyes, the kind brown eyes he remembered. Ludwig's mouth lolled open and his eyes wavered, threatening to close.

"Ludwig!" Feliciano said tenderly, his voice the same as Ludwig remembered. He knelt down in front of him, his facial expression morphing into worry. His eyes sparkled in tears. "Oh God! What happened to you?" he asked in a whisper.

Ludwig opened his mouth; a small trickle of blood ran down to his chin. "Fe...li!" he said weakly. Feliciano gently cupped Ludwig's cut and bruised face with a warm hand. Ludwig leaned slightly into his warm touch. He couldn't remember when he last felt something warm and gentle.

"Shh. It's ok." Feliciano said. A couple tears ran down his face. "I...I'm so sorry!" he gently wrapped his arms around Ludwig's thin, broken frame. Ludwig stayed silent, unable to say or do anything. Feliciano hugging him filled his entire being with peace. All the stress and guilt vanished, all his physical pain drifted away.

Ludwig could feel Feliciano's warm breath ticking his neck. The small Italian buried his face into Ludwig's neck.

Ludwig let his eyes rest close. He was used to these hallucinations now. He knew he shouldn't get too attached to them. He knew that they would disappear after a few seconds or if he was lucky, minutes. When he had his first hallucination, he thought Feliciano had finally come to his senses. He had been so happy. He had hugged Feliciano back, half laughing, half sobbing in joy. Then Feliciano had disappeared like mist in the morning and the real Feliciano returned to beat him. Ludwig had been so confused. The kind Feliciano had felt so real. He was solid and warm and he could feel breath on his skin but that was just cruel tricks of his mind.

The real Feliciano snorted and shook his head in disappointment. "Such a shame. I thought you were stronger then that. I was hoping you would at least be some fun." Feliciano said turning to leave the room. Ludwig looked up, his hallucination disappearing.

"No." he said weakly. He didn't want Feliciano to leave. He needed Feliciano to calm his nerves even if he was furious with him. Feliciano grabbed the doorknob and opened the door slowly. It was like he knew what Ludwig was thinking and only wanted to torture him more. "Wait!" he said hoarsely, struggling to get the words out of his abused throat. Feliciano didn't look back as he walked out of the small cell leaving Ludwig broken and in pain.

Ludwig screamed into the empty room. The scream was hoarse and weak. It made Ludwig wince from the burning in his throat but it felt too good to stop. He had not cried the entire time he had been held, despite his fried nerves. He felt abandoned, forgotten and betrayed. Had no one noticed his absense? Did anyone even care about him? Feliciano, the person he loved to most had caused all his misery and didn't even have the decency to clean his wounds or feed him.

Yet he could not bring himself to hate the Italian. Italy had been his ally in both World Wars. He had been his best friend since then. Ludwig had come to secretly adore the Italian; his laugh, his smile his cute voice with the adorable accent.

Even through all the beatings each weak and Feliciano telling him how much he hated Ludwig, Ludwig could not hate or blame the Italian for the things he did. It had been Ludwig and the other countries who made Feliciano feel so worthless and weak. Ludwig could honestly say he thought the Italian had been perfectly ok. Apparently, the Italian had feelings he had hidden well or Ludwig had been too wrapped up in his own problems to notice anyone else's.

Seeing Feli like this was worse then seeing Feliciano die. The Feliciano he knew was dead but his body still taunted Ludwig. This monster looked and sounded just like his Feliciano that sometimes when Feliciano came to beat him Ludwig would forget it wasn't his Feli and would think it was all just a horrible dream and his Feliciano had finally come to free him. Each time his hopes rose and then his disappointment would crash down harder and harder.

Ludwig could feel the stress and deprivement taking it's tole on his body. He was starting to loose muscle and he was getting thinner and thinner each week. His body was weak and weary from the constant pain, strain and neglect. He knew his evident death was just ahead, looming over him, taunting him. He had given up on hopes of escaping or getting rescued. He resigned himself to waiting in his dark cell for death to come relieve him from the abuse and confusion. Maybe then, would Feliciano finally have his peace and justice.

**A/N:** I must say, this is the most fun I've had writing a story. I was actually really happy with this chapter. OMG! Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed! I LOVE YOU ALL! I wanted to thank my anonymous reviewers for taking the time to review. Thank you soo much guys! The actions coming ahead so look for the next chapter and please review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Lost. Chapter 4.**

**A/N:** The actions beginning to start now. I'm really excited to be honest. Please drop a review and tell me what you think and how I can improve my writing!

_Japans POV_

Kiku Honda, the human personification of Japan walked out of the meeting building, his usually erect posture slightly bent. The meeting had been even more of a disaster then usual. Strangely, Ludwig had not attended the meeting and neither had Italy. Without the loud German to try and keep things on track, things got out of hand. Francis and Arthur kept getting into fights, Alfred was even more loud and obnoxious, Romano freaked out that his _fratello _hadn't been there and he would yell and curse whenever Antonio tried to cheer him up and a certain albino who wasn't even supposed to attend meetings was rampaging for Ludwig. Japan was disappointed to say even his own siblings had even contributed to the situation. Yong Soo kept trying to grope everyone, earning himself a good smack in the head by Elizabetha's frying pan and Yao kept running away from Ivan.

Kiku sighed. That was only the first of a week long string of meetings. If Germany didn't go to the next meetings, things would get even more out of hand. Kiku gently caressed his stomach. Thinking of the meeting gave him a stomach ache.

Japan tried to forget about the meeting and focus on the beautiful scenery. The small Japanese man looked around the streets of Italy. Italy certainly was a beautiful country. The architecture was most admirable and the cobblestone streets a rare and beautiful treat.

A warm breeze gently ran its invisible fingers through Kiku's short charcoal hair. They whispered promises of warm weather in Kiku's expert ear. Kiku felt all his stress fade for a moment, carried away by the wind like a feather.

He sighed regretfully. He should go to Feliciano's house and check up on the Italian.

He quietly walked to his car and began driving to Feliciano's house since the meeting had been in Italy and Ludwig might also be there.

Parking outside the Italians house, Kiku calmly strode to the door and politely knocked. After a few moments, Feliciano opened the door, stuffing a pair of leather gloves into his pocket.

"Kiku?" he asked immediately brightening up.

"Hello Vargas-san." Kiku said bowing slightly from the waist in his traditional greeting. "You do know there was a meeting today?"

Feliciano's eyes stretched wide. "Oh no! I completely forgot!" he exclaimed, his voice thick in an Italian accent.

Kiku sighed. "You should really try and remember next time. Don't forget about the meetings this week."

"Yes Kiku! I'm really sorry." Feliciano exclaimed. He brightened again, quickly discarding what Kiku had just said. "Ve~ How about you come inside?"

Kiku's eyes widened slightly. "Ah, I couldn't. I only came to make sure you were ok. I wouldn't want to intrude."

Feliciano closed his eyes, smiling brightly. "Oh, please come inside! I'll make you some tea!" Feliciano said.

Kiku nodded slightly. He couldn't say no to tea. "It would be rude of me to decline your generous offer so I accept." he said politely.

Feliciano beamed as Kiku politely came inside, removing his shoes by the door. Italy closed the door behind Kiku.

"By the way, have you seen Ludwig-san?" Kiku asked. Feliciano shook his head as he hurried to the kitchen with an energetic spring in his step.

"No, I haven't seen him. Wasn't he at the meeting?" Feliciano asked. Kiku shook his head.

"No. He hadn't attended." Kiku said. Feliciano took out a box of green tea and glanced at Kiku, his usually cheerful eyes beginning to fill with worry.

"That's odd. Ludwig is usually strict about meetings. Do you like anything in your tea?" Feliciano asked, settling the water to boil. Kiku sighed. The Italian couldn't focus on anything for more then a few seconds unless it involved pasta.

"Iie. Plains fine." Kiku said. Feliciano sat down in a chair by the table and offered one to Kiku. Kiku sat down. "Arigato." he said. He silently sat in the chair and sighed. "I was actually hoping he was with you."

"With me?" Feliciano asked looking confused. "He isn't here."

Kiku signed lightly. "Hai. I'll just have to go to his house then." Kiku said. Behind him he heard the whistle from the pot. Feliciano got up to get the pot.

"Do you think he's at his house or do you think he could be in Italy somewhere?" Feliciano said.

Kiku signed and looked down at the table, tracing patterns in the wood, "I don't know. I'm worried something happened to him. It's so unlike him to not attend a meeting. Maybe I should try his cell phone before I go to Germany or start looking in Italy." Japan said. He heard Feliciano walking towards him with his tea and turned to take it from Italy. His eyes widened as he saw the glass pot racing for his head. He didn't have time to duck down or put his arms up. He heard a loud crash and felt heat scorch his neck and run down his back. Pain cut through his skin as a darkness swallowed him up.

_Italy's POV_

Feliciano smiled as Kiku fell to the floor in an unconsious heap with a loud thud. The boiling water soaked into Kiku's pristine white jacket. He stated at the crumpled heap with a grin of satisfaction.

Shards of broken glass littered the kitchen tile, reflecting off the like a thousand of tiny little diamonds. A small trickle of blood seeped from Kiku's head and turned a light red color as it mixed with the puddle of water.

After a few minutes he bent down to pick Kiku up from the floor. As he did, pain pricked his hand. He turned his palm over and saw blood seeping from a cut on his soft skin. The blood ran into the grooves in his hand and flowed towards his wrist. He licked the blood off, moaning softly at the iron taste on his tongue.

He bent down again and picked up the small Japanese mans body. He smiled in triumph seeing the blood running down Kiku's face and neck from scratches on his face. A particularly deep laceration was just above his eyebrow, the blood dropping down between his eyes.

Feliciano threw Kiku's small body over his shoulder. He carried him to his car and threw him in the back. He spread the same blanket he used on Ludwig over Kiku. He drove to the building where he had Ludwig and carried Kiku inside. He took him to the room where his boss was working.

Feliciano entered the cell, light streaming into the room and revealing Ludwig's broken form. How pitiful...

Feliciano easily carried Kiku to another pole in the other end of the room and tied Japan as he had to Ludwig.

A soft moan echoed in the room, echoing as if it were in a cage. Feliciano smiled darkly and looked up to meet eyes with Ludwig's dull blue eyes. As Ludwig's eyes adjusted to the light his eyes filled with confusion.

"Feli...w...what?" he said weakly. Feliciano's heart skipped a few beats at how pitiful he sounded. He lost count of how many times he dreamed of hearing Ludwig's weak voice begging for his life. Now, everything was going right for once in his life. He wanted to savor each moment so it could last him when all the other countries were destroyed.

"I brought you a play mate." Feliciano said smiling in fake friendliness. Feliciano straightened up and moved to the side so Ludwig could see Japans limp form. Ludwig's eyes suddenly filled with a fire and rage that Feliciano hadn't seen in a while. The scorn in it made Feliciano fill with rage. Ludwig wasn't supposed to react like this. He had imagined an utterly dejected and hopeless Ludwig. Instead of showing his anger and surprise, he kept his calm mask on and stared at Ludwig's helpless form.

"Italy, what in Gotts name are you doing? What did Japan ever do to you to deserve this?" Ludwig yelled, his voice cracking like a teenage boy. Feliciano snorted and didn't say anything. Ludwig was straining to keep his voice steady. Instead of making Ludwig stay silent, Feliciano allowed his rant to continue when his anger turned to amusement.

"Kiku never made fun of you or called you a name!" Ludwig bellowed. "He tried to protect you and defend you! He doesn't deserve treatment like this!"

Feliciano snorted. Ludwig could probably shoot lies from his arse. Kiku had made him feel worthless the way he would look at him with his dull eyes. Almost everyone had made fun of him at some point. They all deserved what was coming for them, accept for a few exceptions that were also forgotten and under appreciated. Feliciano glared coldly down at Ludwig with all the hate he could muster. If only looks could kill…

"Tell Kiku I said hi when he wakes up." Feliciano smirked. He gracefully turned on his heels and disappeared like mist in the sun. He ignored the desperate, angry cries of Ludwig calling his name.

"Let the games begin." Feliciano said to himself darkly.

A/N: I was really bored on the trip to Canada. Who? LOL. I'm in Canada as I'm writing this and I finished it at the cabin. I'm so excited to go do Canadian things like fishing! I'm half Canadian, half American but I've only been to Canada a few times. I also forgot that I brought American money. _ I need to exchange that then somehow. LOL. Anyway, see you next chapter. PLEASE REVIEW! I read each one about a billion times! Arigato!


	5. Chapter 5

**Lost. Chapter 5**

**A/N:** Wow! I wrote like three chapters today! Haha. I love Canada. I think I need to find a way to squeeze him into the story. I kinda forgot about him. _ Sorry Mattie! I'll squeeze you in somehow!

_Germany's POV_

Ludwig continued to yell Feliciano's name even after he left the room. After a few minutes his yell was barley a whisper from straining his voice for so long. He wished he had some water to soothe his throat but he wouldn't get his water bucket until the evening. He slumped against the pole, his breathing coming out as short wheezes.

He could understand that Feliciano could be mad at him but he couldn't imagine him being mad at Japan. Japan was so even tempered and had defended the Italian when people called him names.

Ludwig didn't know what Feliciano had done to Kiku and he couldn't see the extent of his injuries except for the dried blood on his face and neck. Without proper attention, the scratches would certainly become infected. There was no doubt in Ludwig's mind that he wouldn't receive medical attention unless they left the building. Feliciano only just kept him alive by giving him food once every two days and a small pale of murky water at the end of every day. The scratches on Ludwig were inflamed and throbbing, screaming at Ludwig to get them taken care of. The only think Feliciano did about them was agitate them even further by his weekly beatings. It had occurred to Ludwig that Kiku must be here because Ludwig missed a meeting. It's been about a few weeks since he arrived in his private hell so he must have missed a meeting sometime between then.

Kiku groaned softly, his voice echoing in the small room and snapping Ludwig from his thoughts. His bowed head glancing up weakly, blinking his dull eyes.

"Kiku?" Ludwig said. He was surprised at how much his own voice cracked and how weak he sounded. Kiku's usually emotionless eyes looked even deader.

"Ludwig-san?" Kiku asked, his voice thick in confusion. He groaned. "W...what happened?"

"Feliciano kidnapped you." Ludwig said softly. Kiku's eyebrows furrowed, his mouth forming a small 'o'. After a few moments, Kiku nodded. Ludwig knew Kiku was awkward in situations like this. Kiku didn't have many friends and Feliciano had always been kind to him. He knew how Kiku felt like he had been stabbed in the back. It was painful and hurt more then any real wound.

"Ah. I remember now." Kiku said quietly. "I went to his house to see if you or Feliciano were there since you both missed the meeting today and he invited me inside for tea. He then hit me in the head with the water boiler." Kiku winced as his back rubbed against the pole.

"What's wrong?" Ludwig asked, worried that maybe he was hurt more. Kiku winced again.

"He left the boiling water inside the boiler when he hit me with it and it burned my skin." Kiku said. Ludwig winced. His body already hurt enough without having burns to aggravate it. He felt his heart wrench in pain at the thought of Feliciano doing something so horrible just because he had been ignored.

"You said Vargas-san did this?" Kiku asked shifting slowly against the pole.

Ludwig nodded. "Yes he did this." In the dark, Ludwig could see Kiku's stunned expression. Kiku's shaky breathing echoed in the room, sounding more ghostly then human. In any normal circumstances, Ludwig would have been nervous at the sound but he was too weary to feel anything other then the sharp guilt that replaced his dead feeling whenever he looked at Feliciano or Kiku.

"But why? I would not imagine Feliciano-san doing something like this." Kiku said in disbelief. Ludwig winced, knowing the feeling of betrayal all too well. The hurt in Kiku's voice was like a thorn in his heart.

"Feliciano is mad at us for making fun of him." Ludwig explained, not having the energy to explain further. His voice was flat, already a shadow of his normal bellowing voice.

"S...so he puts us in a cell? Ludwig-san, you look horrible. How could he do this to us?" Japan asked, his voice rising. The Japanese man never got mad unless it had to do with money. "He's pushing everyone away! He's not going to be able to get out of this situation unharmed." Ludwig winced. He never felt so depressed in his long existence, even through any of the World Wars. He knew Feliciano wouldn't stop at this point. He had gotten a taste of revenge and, judging by the look in his eyes, wanted more.

"Poor Feli. He must have felt horrible all these years. How could we not have noticed?" Ludwig said dejectedly.

"This isn't revenge anymore Ludwig-san. I think this is more like some insane obsession" Kiku commented.

Ludwig nodded, his body trembling. "I know. How do you suppose we stop this? I don't want to hurt him but I can't let him walk around free to hurt other countries and innocent people." Ludwig said.

"I honestly don't know. What _can_ we even do being tied up like this?" Kiku asked quietly. Ludwig blinked sadly. This question had often crossed his mind but he still hadn't been able to figure it out.

"Nothing; there's nothing to do." Ludwig sighed. Kiku's eyes drooped, his energy and hope dwindling down. Ludwig regretted having crushing his hope but what was the use of building his hope when there was no hope

_Italy's POV_

Feliciano neared the meeting room. He had been late on purpose in order to make his story look accurate. As he approached the door he could hear many loud voices, mostly Arthur, Alfred and Francis. He rubbed his eyes roughly and quickly blinked tears into his eyes. Once he looked like he was crying he quickly burst into the room.

"Help!" he cried. "Ludwig and Kiku are missing!" he sobbed pitifully. Romano and Spain was quickly by his side. Spain rubbed his back trying to comfort him and Romano circled around him like a nervous mother.

"What?" Gilbert asked shocked to hear about his _bruder_. Feliciano wondered why he even at the meeting? He didn't represent a country anymore and yet he was still convinced he was 'awesome' when all he did was use his friends for his benefit.

"Kiku was at yesterdays meeting." Arthur commented, looking up from fighting Francis. Stupid British know-it-all who treated Feliciano like an idiot. England had always tormented Italy during World War II, even though it helped Italy's act. He hated when people acted like they were better then others when they so clearly weren't. His economy was low and he insisted he was an empire when those days were long over. He looked forward to crushing the Brit and seeing his crushed face, wet with dirt and tears.

"I we...went to his h...hotel yesterday b...but he wasn't there. I tried his cell phone and he wouldn't answer!" Feliciano sobbed.

"Aiyaaa!" Yao exclaimed loudly. "Where could he be, aru!"

"He must have became one with mother Russia, da?" Ivan asked smiling sweetly. The massive Russian had always scared Romano and Feliciano. He had some dark secret hidden under his sweet smile that chilled Feliciano. Maybe it was time he turned the table and showed the tundra country who was stronger.

"What about Ludwig? He wasn't at yesterdays meeting." Arthur commented matter of factly. Well, duh? Don't sound so smart like you're the only one who knows it!

"What if they're hurt?" Feliciano wailed helplessly. These people were so easy to trick it was actually quite funny. Spain rubbed his back and smiled gently. The Spaniard constantly got on Feliciano's nerves. He would always smile and laugh no matter what the situation was. It was quite annoying since the Spaniard pretended to adore Feliciano when he didn't even try to understand Feliciano or take him seriously.

"Don't cry, amigo. I'm sure Senior Ludwig and Senior Kiku is alright." he said soothingly. Feliciano sniffed and wiped his eyes.

"W...what are we going to do?" Feliciano whimpered helplessly.

"I'll go find them 'cause I'm the hero!" Alfred exclaimed with a loud laugh. Alfred's voice was always so loud and annoying. Didn't the stupid American ever know when to shut up? He was always the self proclaimed hero when he didn't even save anyone. He was always butting into others business and making things worse. Many years ago, Feliciano had desperately leave hints to the others so that they would notice something was wrong. No one noticed, always being too busy with their own problems and never extending a hand, even if they were close to Feliciano. Feliciano desperately wanted one of them to notice so he wouldn't have to through with his plan. As time passed, he got so irritated that he wanted them all to pay for ignoring him and making him feel so horribly.

"And what do you suppose we do?" Arthur snapped, his thick eyebrows furrowing. He crossed his arms over his green uniform.

"You can all be my back up!" Alfred loudly exclaimed with a fist pump.

"You bloody git! You can't just expect us to just stand back and let you do all the work!" Arthur yelled.

"Aww! Are you worried about me, Iggy?" Alfred asked in a joking manner. He probed Arthur's side with his elbow, earning himself a smack.

Arthur's eyebrows twitched, a light blush blossoming on his face like a pink rose. "N...no I'm not!" he stuttered, looking away from Alfred so he wouldn't see his blush.

"Well good! Because I'm the hero and heroes don't need people to be worried about them!" Alfred exclaimed a faint blush heating his face.

"Can we please focus here, aru?" Yao exclaimed, masking over everyone's voices. It was good that Feliciano wouldn't have to rely on them. They wouldn't be able to work together even if their lives or someone else's depended on it.

Everyone quieted down, surprised by Yao's outburst and paid attention.

"We need to figure out what to do about this." Roderick said. Austria had raised Italy after Grandpa Rome disappeared. Not even Italy's cuteness had been able to win him over or at least lessen his cruelty. He had forced young Italy, deemed as Chibitalia, to wear dresses. He had locked him in a room without pasta and only showed kindness when he played the piano.

"Well, why don't we wait to see if they come to the next meeting? Maybe they don't want us to bother then because they're sick or something." Hungary suggested. Italy didn't have much against Hungary. She had been kind to him and defended him when the others talked about him and even comforted him when he lost Holy Rome.

"Maybe Germany is on his period again and Kiku is playing maid again. Honhonhon." Francis laughed. Everyone rolled their eyes. Francis was always a pervert. Even when Feliciano was younger, Francis would try to do dirty things to him, like make him become part of France.

"Francis, you wanker! Men can't have periods!" Arthur exclaimed loudly.

"Then why are you so crabby, Angleterre. Amerique always told me it was because you were having your 'friend'" Francis teased, raising an eyebrow suspiciously.

"I'm not crabby! I'm a proper English gentleman!" Arthur said.

"We should focus, da?" Russia said still smiling sweetly.

"There's nothing to do! We should wait for tomorrows meeting before we get stressed out." Roderick said. Heaven forbid Roderick gets stressed and actually grow a few white hairs!

"B...but..." Feliciano whimpered. His bottom lip jutted out over his upper lip.

"Shh. Don't cry, Feli. Things will be ok. Why don't you come stay at my place? It's not too far from here." Spain said cheerfully, still trying to comfort the crying Italian.

"O...ok. Grazie." Feliciano sniffed.

"H...hey! What about me, bastardo?" Romano snapped. Romano always got jealous if Spain paid attention to Feliciano. But Feliciano could always use that to his advantage. He would love nothing more then to destroy the other countries with his _fratello_ by his side. They were both half of the same whole, bound together heart and soul. Despite Romano's tough outside, Feliciano knew it was just his way of asking for attention.

"You can come too, Lovi." Spain said ruffling Romano's hair making his face blush. "You're always welcome at my house, mi tomate."

"G...good." Romano stammered. He seemed to catch himself and quickly added, "Not that I care at all, bastardo!"

"Let's get this meeting started!" Alfred exclaimed. "I'm really hungry!"

"But Amerique, you just ate before we came!" Francis exclaimed looking at the North American country.

"I'm hungry again!" Alfred whined pouting.

Arthur pinched his nose. "Your both hopeless!" he sighed. All the commotion eventually faded from Feliciano's ears. He pretended to be too shocked to pay attention but he could see Elizabetha, Antonio and Romano casting him glances. The meeting shortly ended and Spain gently laid his hand on Feliciano's shoulders.

"Let's go home, amigo." he said gently. Feliciano nodded, looking like a beaten puppy and allowed Spain to guide him to his car. Romano followed behind practically biting at their heels.

Feliciano stared out the window the entire way to Spain's house. Spain had bought a house in Italy so he could be closer to Romano. He sometimes used it if he wanted to go on vacation or if there was a meeting in Italy.

Feliciano was led by Spain through the gate, along the side of the pool and into the house. Feliciano glanced around the brightly lit house and thought of how he could stage the next part of his plan. Everything was running perfect and smoothly. He only had a few things to do before his master plan could be fulfilled.

**A/N:** Yay! I think this was my longest chapter so far. I'm really excited for the next chapter! The action starts then. Please drop a review and tell me how you think the stories going!


	6. Chapter 6

**Lost. Chapter 6**

_See previous chapters for human names._

**A/N:** Not much to say, still in Canada. My cousins think I have an accent ^_^. Well, onward with the story.

I keep forgetting disclaimers. *sweatdrops* Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or any of it's characters.

_Italy's POV_

"See you later, Feliciano!" Antonio called from the front door.

"Bye!" Feliciano called back from a few rooms over. He heard the door close as Romano and Antonio left to go shopping and to go for lunch. Romano had insisted that that it wasn't a date but the bright red blush on Romano's face made it obvious that it was.

Romano could be one of the only people Feliciano trusted truly. Sure Romano yelled at him a lot but Lovi was the only one who Feliciano knew loved him. He had an odd way of showing it but he had often heard Romano defend him, even if he called him an idiot while he did so. Feliciano was Romano's brother, his other twin, so Feliciano knew he didn't like to show emotion and showed affection by calling people names.

There was some truth in Lovino's thinking though; if you didn't show emotion, or put on a fake mask, no one would care to notice your true feelings. Feliciano had often thought of how his brother hid from his pain so well. He could probably recruit his brother to work with him.

Feliciano waited until he was sure they had left and weren't coming back. He quietly rose from his chair and looked around the room with a smirk. The room was like an empty canvas and he was the painter. It was full of so much potential; he could see all the beautiful possibilities he could create with just a swing on an arm or the shot of a gun he had hidden in his jacket.

He first started with going outside and, using the plants along the side as cover, shot the doorknob, breaking it open and causing the large oak door to swing open almost ominously. .

Pulling on a pare of gloves, he opened the door. He walked towards the room where he had been sitting. Once in the room he shot a hole in the couch and started knocking over lamps, chairs, picture frames and other things Antonio had around the room.

Once satisfied with the beautiful chaos in that room, Feliciano moved to the next room.

He destroyed the room just as he had to the other and went into the kitchen. He knocked over things on the counter, smirking as the glass broke around his feet.

Picking up a knife, Feliciano admired the gleam on the silver blade from the lights and smiled. He skillfully took the knife and ran it down his arm. The skin parted to the knife and started to bleed. It reminded him of all the times he had been alone at night to release all the pain and self hatred.

He grinned insanely when he realized that this time he was doing it for his benefit. No more blaming himself or causing himself pain. He had taken a different path for his life and loved every minute of it.

He let the blood drip to the floor and let the knife clatter down. He slowly walked to the back door letting the blood slowly drip down his forearm and onto the floor. Once outside he took a cloth from his pocket and put it over his wound. He walked casually down the road until he was about a mile away to where he had left his car. Climbing in, he drove to his house with a big grin.

_Spain's POV_

"Aw! Lovi, you're so cute!" Antonio cooed as he turned onto his street. He really couldn't resist the Italians pouting or swearing.

Romano pouted, crossing his arms. "S...shut up bastardo. I'm not cute." he grumbled. Antonio's smile only widened at Romano's red tinted face. He was just so cute when he got mad; turning the color of a big, plump tomato.

"Mi tomate, you're blushing." Antonio pointed out; poking Romano's puffed out cheek. Romano's eye twitched slightly in irritation, causing his mouth to curl slightly.

"Baci il mio culo(Kiss my ass)." Romano yelled quickly. Antonio quickly translated the Italian.

"Maybe later, Lovi." Antonio said pecking Romano's cheek making him blush even more if that was possible. He loved being able to make him do that so easily.

"S...shut up!" Romano stuttered. Antonio smiled and pulled up to the house. Antonio parked the car. As Romano unbuckled his seat belt and leaned forward, Antonio snagged Romano by his waist and pulled him onto his lap.

"W-what are you doing?" Romano exclaimed squirming in Antonio's grasp. His eyes met with Spain's and he stopped seeing the affection glowing in the Spaniards eyes.

"Te amo, mi poco di tomate." Spain said tenderly.

"T...te amo, bastardo." Romano stammered with a light blush. He turned his gaze away from Antonio's. Antonio smiled gently and brushed Romano's hair, avoiding the curl...for now. Antonio's heartbeat quickened. It wasn't often when Romano said those words but when he did, it meant more then anything else.

"Did you have fun?" Antonio asked gently brushing Romano's cheek. He and Romano had gone shopping then went out to a fancy Italian restaurant where Romano had of course gotten pasta.

"S...si." Romano said leaning slightly into Antonio's touch.

"Bene! I'm glad." Antonio smiled. He would do anything to make the Italian happy. He quickly pecked Romano's cheek and let him get up. Romano blushed and slowly got up. Antonio did not look at Romano's butt as he got out of the car...

Antonio's smile didn't fade as he got out of the car. He went to the back of the car to grab the bags. Romano took a couple bags and began walking up to the house. Antonio followed behind him, watching Romano walk ahead of him. Romano walked up to the porch and froze, dropping the bags to the floor as his body stiffened and his arms went ridged.

"What's the matter, Lovi?" Antonio asked. He looked at Romano's shocked and horrified expression then to the side to see what Romano saw. He dropped his own bags when he saw what Romano saw.

The front door was ajar and the door knob was deformed. A bullet casing lay discarded on the floor. At the same time, Romano and Antonio rushed inside afraid of what they would find if they went inside.

Stopping at the doorway of the living room their fear escalated. There was a bullet hole in the couch, a gun lying innocently on the ground, pictures and furniture skewed all over the room, indicating a struggle. The mess continued to the next room then to the kitchen.

Antonio's heart thumped loudly in his chest, so loud he was sure Lovino could hear it. It sickened him to think of Feliciano sitting at home and then have someone break in when he'd already been through so much. He imagined Feliciano weakly struggling to run away, getting thrown against a wall, knocking over a picture frame or onto a table, making it crash under the force of the weight.

Romano quickly walked ahead of him. Upon entering the kitchen a wail left Romano's lips. Antonio hurried in, fearing that Feliciano's dead body would by lying on the floor. Instead there was a small puddle of blood and a knife on the floor along with shards of glass. Antonio spotted drips of blood leading to the back door. He quickly followed it seeing it stop outside. Whoever had come inside had taken Feliciano with him.

He quickly returned to Romano who was trembling and struggling to hold his tears. Antonio wrapped Romano in an embrace. Romano stiffened and fought at first but relaxed when he couldn't hold his tough outer barrier together any longer. He hugged Antonio tightly, burying his head into Antonio's shoulder.

"Its ok to cry, Lovi. It's not good to hold things in." Antonio whispered in Romano's ear. He stroked the back of Romano's head softly. A sob escaped Romano. As if a dam had broke, all of Romano's tears fell. His shoulders shook as he cried into Antonio's shirt.

He rubbed Romano's back gently. He tried to push down the feelings of dread. Whoever had taken Feliciano wouldn't mind killing him if he was trying to shoot and stab him. Antonio pulled Romano down to a crouch, holding him tightly to his own body.

Romano's sobs eventually died down to soft whimpers. Antonio rocked him gently like a child.

Antonio gently pressed his lips to Romano's forehead. Romano pressed the side of his face to Antonio's.

"Everything will be ok, Romano. We'll find him and bring him home and everything will go back to normal." Antonio said trying to convince himself just as much as Romano.

"D...do you think whoever t...took Ludwig and Kiku took F...Feli?" Romano asked gently. Antonio frowned. He couldn't remember Romano ever calling Ludwig by his name.

"I think so, Lovi. But I don't think Feliciano's dead." Antonio said softly. He gently brushed Romano's bangs as if he was breakable. "There's not too much blood so perhaps whoever took Feli just injured him to get him out." Antonio gently patted Romano's back. "Let's get up and start the drive to the meeting. We'll report this to everyone after I clean up a bit. They'll have to take this serious now." Antonio said.

Romano nodded and Antonio gently pulled Romano to his feet. Romano kept his head tilted down, trying to hide his face as he wiped his tears. A sad smile tugged at Spain's frowning lips. He brushed the tear away. Romano looked up, his eyes red from crying. He looked so much like a beaten dog that Antonio couldn't resist hugging him again.

"Don't be too sad. We'll find him, I promise." he said. Romano hugged him back, surprising the Spaniard.

"Gracias Spain." Lovino said quietly. Antonio pulled back and rubbed his shoulders.

"Why don't you take a siesta while I clean? I promise to wake you up when we need to go for the meeting." Antonio said.

Romano nodded quietly and climbed the stairs quietly. Poor Lovino... Antonio couldn't help but feel bad for him.

Antonio decided to start in the kitchen by sweeping up the glass. Afterwards he wiped up the blood, feeling sick to his stomach at the fact that someone out there is kidnapping countries and causing harm to someone as sweet and innocent as Feliciano.

Antonio was suddenly anxious to get to Romano before whoever it was who took Feliciano came for him too. He tidied up a few of the things that were knocked over before quietly hurrying upstairs.

Finding his way to Romano's room Antonio quietly crept in. Romano was curled up in a ball under his covers like a child. Antonio smiled gently at Romano's cute form and sat on the edge of the bed. The old bed groaned softly in response and sank under his weight. He gently brushed his hair. He drank in Romano's handsome features as he slept.

Romano smiled gently, still sleeping and moved to curl around Antonio's form. Antonio beamed brightly. Romano really was very cute. Antonio looked down at the Italian. His joyful smile softened to a look of adoration.

An image of Feliciano bleeding on the floor crossed his mind. It quickly turned into Romano on the floor; his dead eyes staring up at the ceiling, blood coming from his mouth and a crater in his chest and his beautiful russet hair getting stained with his life liquid. Antonio winced and shook his head. He didn't want to imagine his beautiful Lovi like that. He wouldn't let anyone lay a finger on his Lovi. He'd die before he ever saw that happen if he had anything to do with it.

Time flew and next thing he knew, it was time to wake Romano. He gently shook Romano's shoulders.

"Lovi!" he sang softly. Romano gently blinked his eyes open. He sat up half asleep. Antonio chuckled gently.

"I'll carry you out, mio tomate." he said. He picked Romano up bridal style and stood up. Romano wrapped his arms around his neck and leaned his head against Antonio's shoulder still tired. Antonio kissed his forehead and carefully walked downstairs to his car.

_Spain's POV_

Antonio glanced at Romano as they neared the meeting room. He had pulled himself together, even slapping the Spaniard for carrying him. His mouth was set in a firm line and his eyes had a dangerous look to them.

Antonio and Romano walked inside the meeting room where everyone was arguing and yelling. Ludwig and Kiku still weren't there and neither was Feliciano.

"Shut up!" Romano yelled loudly upon entering the room. Everyone silenced and looked at Romano in shock. "Shut you mouths for just once and pay attention for once. Because _you_ didn't take action when Feliciano told us about Kiku when Ludwig had already been missing, Feliciano was kidnapped. "Romano said loudly, glaring at the other countries, his eyes daring one of them to speak.

"What? Are you sure?" Arthur asked. Antonio could see Romano's eye twitch. Romano was so cute how he still didn't like Arthur even though both Arthur and Antonio's pirate days were over. Antonio reminded himself that he had to be serious; Feliciano and Ludwig and Kiku were relying on them.

"Of coarse I'm sure!" Romano snapped. "The house was torn up and there was _blood_ on the floor!" Romano's voice cracked slightly in emotion. Antonio put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it lightly. Romano kept his eyes hard even though Antonio could see tears glistening in his eyes like tiny lakes. He clenched his jaw, desperate to keep his tough mask but it was plain to see he was on the verge of crying.

Antonio wrapped his arms around Romano. "Shh. It's ok, Lovi." he said softly. He kissed the side of Romano's head. A pin could have been dropped on the floor and it would have been heard loud and clear. Romano never allowed Antonio to hug him in the middle of a meeting.

"H...hey. Don't cry, Romano. We'll find Feliciano." Francis said.

"Yeah dude! Feliciano will be just fine!" Alfred said. Romano pulled away from Antonio, wiping his eyes and setting his mouth in a frown again.

"S...sorry." Romano said softly to no one in particular. Antonio kept his hand on Lovino's shoulder.

"You should go home and get some rest." Arthur said. Romano shook his head firmly.

"No. I need to find Feli!" Romano said. A determined glow clouded over the sadness in Romano's eyes.

"We'll split and half of us will go to Antonio's house and half will go to Feliciano's house and try to look for clues. It's too late to do anything by the time we get there and you need to get a hold of yourself." Arthur said.

Romano sighed. "Fine." he grumbled. Antonio was honestly surprised he didn't yell at Arthur about his comment. No matter what would happen, Romano always had his attitude and spunk.

"Who wants to join us tomorrow?" Alfred asked loudly. Antonio found his mood lightened by Alfred's tone. It wasn't the Americans usually loud tone. He was one of the strongest nations for a reason and he knew when to be serious. His tone was loud and encouraging; making those who heard want to stand up and do as he said.

"I will!" Arthur said, quick to join his lover.

"I guess I'll have to keep an eye on Angleterre." Francis said making England gawk. 

"I'll go, aru!" Yao called. Antonio hadn't even considered how Yao would feel. Kiku was his brother and even though they had a rocky history they were still brothers. Siblings were friends for life. While friends and crushes came and went, siblings stayed together through thick and thin.

"Mother Russia will come, da?" Ivan said smiling sweetly. No doubt,  
>Ivan probably wanted in just to see a few people begging on their hands and knees.<p>

"The awesome Prussia will come to help mein bruder!" Gilbert exclaimed. Gilbert and his bruder didn't appear to be too close but it was obvious by their hair ruffles and how defensive they were of each other that everything wasn't what it appeared to be on the surface.

"I'll help too." Matthew said timidly. Everyone ignored him but Spain and Romano heard, glad that the timid North American country was helping.

"I'll help." Roderick said. Antonio couldn't imagine the Austrian wanting to get dirty but he had raised Feliciano so he probably wanted to find the Italian like he did.

"I'll go." Elizabetha said, no doubt not letting Roderick go alone when Feliciano had grown up with her too.

Romano couldn't help but smile seeing the group of people willing to help his fratello, "Thank you. All of you." he said quietly.

_  
>Spain's POV<em>

As soon as all the doors were closed Romano turned to look at Antonio.

"There's no way I'm waiting until tomorrow to start looking for Feli. I'm going to somehow go to Feliciano's house if you want to go." Romano said. His eyes were hard in determination. Antonio smiled gently, proud of how cool and collected Romano was.

"Of course I'll go with you, Lovi." Antonio said. Romano's expression didn't change. He jerked his head almost in a nod to acknowledge the Spaniard.

"Let's go then, tomato bastardo!" he exclaimed. Antonio nodded and drove to the younger Italians house.

"I'm going to go look for something by the road. Can you start looking in the house so I can move up towards the yard?" Romano said pointing towards the driveway. It was dim now but the moonlight shined down on the lawn, casting long shadows on the grass.

"Alright. I'll go check inside." Antonio said obediently. Romano nodded and headed off towards the road.

Antonio watched him for a couple moments with a small smile. He turned and walked through the gate and along the pool. Antonio glanced down at the crystal water, the lights on the side of the pool casting water marks on the side of the pool. The shapes danced on the tiles and on the Spaniards tan face.

Antonio glanced up as the motion activated light switched on. Antonio stared as a shadow darted across the window. His eyebrows furrowed. Who would be in Feliciano's house at this time of night?

There was a sound on the concrete behind Spain. Antonio glanced around, his eyes widening to see Feliciano's face. Relief washed over him for a brief moment before dread replaced it.

"W...what..." Antonio said confused as Feliciano smirked at him. Feliciano's hands rose to the side of Antonio's face making the Spaniard flinch. Something wasn't right! Feliciano was gone! He was kidnapped! This hardly looked like the face of a kidnapped man.

Feliciano smiled sweetly before thrusting Antonio's head to meet Feliciano's raised knee. Antonio was quickly consumed by unconsciousness.

_Romano's POV_

Romano was walking up the driveway when he heard a splash. He turned around and glanced to the house.

"Toni?" Romano asked. No answer. "Antonio?" Romano asked feeling worried. Still no answer. Romano took off running towards the pool. The idiot probably just knocked something into the water! He went through the door and looked around the pool. Seeing everything was still in place and seeing no one he felt fear seize his intestines. He quickly looked into the clear water and saw Antonio's body at the bottom of the pool. He appeared to be still, not attempting to swim or slow his quick descent to the pool bottom.

"Antonio!" Romano exclaimed loudly. He quickly dove in the water without a second thought, desperate to get to his lover.

**A/N:** Cliffhanger! ОдО I think _this_ was the longest chapter so far. It really gets good from here so please review...it makes me happy. ^_^ Grazie!


	7. Chapter 7

**Lost. Chapter 7**

See chapter five for human names.

**A/N:** Yay! Longest chapter yet! YAY! A little over 4,000 words! I'm soo happy! Woot! Enjoy. ^_^

_Romano's POV_

The water parted for Romano's form. Silvery drops splashed the concrete.

Opening his eyes underwater, Romano quickly spotted the Spaniards form at the bottom of the pool. His chocolate hair swayed and floated softly as if the waters fingers were gently playing with his hair. Spain's lips were gaped open slightly and his eyes were closed.

Romano's heartbeat quickened in fear, hoping he wasn't too late. Romano swam down to the bottom to where Antonio was and wrapped his arm around the Spaniards thin waist. The pressure of the water weighted down, hurting his head. He kicked up on the bottom of the pool. Antonio was a dead weight in his arms but Romano wasn't willing to let him go. He would save him or die trying.

He kicked his legs and wiggled desperately. Looking up, he could see the surface getting closer. Anticipation and adrenaline coursed through his veins giving him the extra boost to break to the surface and pull the Spaniard to the side of the pool. He pushed the Spaniard onto the side of the pool and then climbed out.

Kneeling over the unconscious Antonio, Romano gently turned his face towards him. Antonio's face was pale and his lips were tinted in blue. Romano didn't even notice he was crying until a sob escaped his lips.

Romano bent over Antonio shaking him roughly. "Wake up!" Romano begged him. Antonio hung limply from Romano's grasp like a rag doll. More tears ran down Romano's face. Oh please God, don't take Antonio!

He gently laid Antonio down. He tilted his jaw back trying to remember the CPR course he took. He put his hands over Antonio's chest and pressed down and up, down and up. He leaned over, gently cupping Antonio's pale wet face as he pressed his lips to Antonio's. He breathed in. Another sob escaped him as he pulled back. Antonio stayed still, irresponsive to Romano's desperate attempts to get the water out.

Romano pressed on Toni's chest again. He pressed his lips to Spain's again. Spain's body suddenly heaved up against Romano's chest, coughing harshly. Romano held Antonio tightly and helped him turn to the side.

Antonio's body wracked in coughs, spitting up large amounts of water. Romano gently rubbed Antonio's back, trying to soothe him. He would take away all of Antonio's pain if he could. Once his coughs subsided, Romano turned him to his back and cradled his body to him. Antonio's eyes fluttered gently, his mouth slightly gapped open. Romano gently brushed Antonio's bangs, smiling in relief. Antonio glanced up at Romano, his eyes full of exhaustion.

"What happened?" Romano asked gently.

"F...Feli." Antonio said barley over a whisper. His eyes closed and he leaned his head against Romano. Romano checked to make sure he was breathing fine before smiling gently.

Romano stood up carefully, holding Antonio to him, nuzzling Antonio's head in between his neck and shoulder. He carried Antonio to his car and gently laid him out in the backseat. He took off his jacket and laid it over Antonio's shivering body. He got in his car and drove to the hospital. Once there he checked Antonio in and a couple nurses came and quickly took him to an empty room.

After the nurses left the room saying that they wanted to keep an eye on him since Antonio hit his head on something. Romano went inside Antonio's room. Antonio lay on the hospital bed with his eyes closed.

Romano sat down on a chair and grasped Antonio's hand, looking at the peaceful expression on the Spaniards face. He couldn't believe how close he had been to almost loosing him. Despite how Romano always yelled at Antonio, he truly did care about him. He didn't know what he'd do if he ever did lose him.

Romano gently brushed Antonio's face with the back of his hand. Antonio seemed so small and fragile underneath the hospital sheets. A big purple bruise stuck out on Spain's pale forehead. His skin was still pale and paper thin, such a strong contrast to his usually tanned, calloused skin.

The more Romano looked at Antonio the angrier he got. There was no way Antonio had tripped and fell. The side of the pool had been completely dry and Antonio always walked away from the edge of the pool. Someone must have pushed the Spaniard into the pool. That would explain the bruise on Antonio's face.

Romano couldn't stop thinking of what Antonio had said. Romano knew Antonio was worried about Feliciano but he wouldn't have whispered his name if he saw Romano after he almost drowned. He knew the Spaniard had wanted to trade him for Feliciano but that had been many, many years ago. Antonio loved Romano just as much as Romano loved him; the Spaniard was just better at showing emotion.

The only thing he could think of is maybe Antonio saw Feliciano before he fell in. There was no way Feliciano had pushed the Spaniard in and Romano doubted that Feli's captor still had the younger of the Italy brothers.

Both of those possibilities seemed practically impossible, which further confused Romano. Maybe since Antonio had almost drowned he thought Romano was Feliciano since he had been so worried about him.

Glancing up at the clock Romano noticed that visiting hours would be over in a few minutes.

Romano carefully bent over Antonio's form and lightly kissed his forehead.

"I'll be back tomorrow." he said gently. He gently brushed Antonio's cheek. "Get well soon."

Romano rose from his chair and walked to the door. Ignoring his erge to run back to Toni's room he walked to his car. He fingered through his hair with an exasperated sigh.

He covered his face with his hands. He breathed heavily to keep from crying. He didn't know what to do. First Ludwig went missing, then Kiku, then Feliciano and now the attack on Spain. All the people around him were disappearing. He had no clue what to do. Romano was terrified. There were so many people relying on him and his decisions. He really wanted to find the bastardo who hurt Antonio. He also really wanted to go home and take a nap but he was afraid to go home. If someone had hurt Feli and Toni who were such sweet and cheerful people then they wouldn't hesitate to hurt a person like himself.

Romano never knew how much he needed the Spaniard. He knew he loved him, not that he would ever admit it, but Antonio was always the person Romano ran to when he was scared. Antonio was always more than happy to comfort Lovino.

Romano let out a long shaky breath. He flipped his cell phone out and checked his calendar. Oh thank God...the meeting would be around midday tomorrow! He smiled. That would work perfectly. Romano turned on his car and drove towards his house. He could go home and go to bed and go to the meeting in the morning.

Romano crawled into his bed and curled under the covers. Despite the warmth of his blanket he still felt cold. He couldn't feel warm knowing that Feli could be dead or dying, that Antonio was unconscious in a hospital and that whoever hurt them could come for him next. He closed his eyes tightly and willed for sleep to come. For a few agonizing minutes he couldn't sleep and it left his mind to wander. Eventually he was able to fall into a light sleep.

Standing in a town in Italy, Romano looked around confused. The usually busy and crowded streets were empty.

Romano took a few steps forward, his shoes echoing eerily off of the cobblestone road.

"H-hello?" he asked in a frightened voice. Hearing his voice echo made Romano angry. He couldn't be afraid when he had so many people depending on him for once. He needed to be brave!

He continued to walk determined. There had to be a reason he was having this dream. Finally, the silence was broken by a child like laugh coming from behind him. Romano looked behind him and saw a small child run around a corner.

"Wait!" he called. He gave chase.

He went around the corner. He followed the child around a couple more turns until Romano came to an ally.

Standing at the end of the ally was Antonio. His eyes were closed and he had a warm smile on his face.

"Antonio?" Romano asked confused. He saw the child- himself when he was younger- peeking from behind the Spaniards toned legs.

Antonio tilted his head slightly. He opened his mouth and let out a horrible shriek, although still smiling. The sound startled Romano from his sleep abruptly.

Romano woke up early the next morning to the high pitched cry of his alarm clock. His ears were still ringing from Spain's screaming in his dreams. He panted to catch his breath for a moment.

He immediately got up and quickly got dressed. He didn't bother to eat breakfast. He wanted to visit Antonio before going to the meeting.

He quickly headed to Antonio's room. He had about thirty minutes before he had to leave for the meeting which was going to start in 45 minutes. He walked into Antonio's room quietly.

Antonio was still lying on the bed sleeping. He had improved a lot; his face only had a touch of paleness and the bruise couldn't be seen as easily. He sat down in the chair beside the bed and clasped his hand around Antonio's hand again. Antonio moaned softly and turned his head towards Romano slightly. The Spaniards eyes cracked open and stared at Romano. A warm smile curved at his lips. Romano gently squeezed Antonio's hand.

"Hey!" Romano said. "You dumb bastardo? How dare you scare me like that?" he snapped. He sighed. That wasn't at all what he wanted to say. "You feeling better?"

Antonio nodded, "Si. Are you ok?" he asked, his voice sounding almost normal.

Romano smiled gently and nodded. Antonio would be the only one to ask if someone else was ok when he himself had almost died.

"Yeah. Do you remember what happened?" Romano asked wanting to get as much information as he could before he could before he went to the meeting.

Antonio looked away, suddenly looking nervous, "Um well no. I'm sorry; I don't remember anything. Not you, not me, not what happened..." Antonio said apologetically.

Romano struggled to grasp what Antonio just told him. He couldn't remember anything? How could this happen? Romano was only partly aware that his breathing hitched and that his grasp tightened around Antonio. He only noticed when Antonio squeezed back tightly.

"I...I'm sorry. I know you must be close to me and I am truly sorry for forgetting you. Please, believe me when I say it's nothing personal." Antonio said. Romano forced a smile.

"N...no. It's fine." he said. He took a slow breath before continuing, "My name is Lovino Romano Vargas. Your name is Antonio Fernandez Carriedo. We both represent countries. I am South Italy and you are Spain." Romano said. Spain nodded slowly, his eyebrows knitting together. After a while, he grinned.

"Can I call you Lovi? It's so much easier to say!" Antonio asked cheerfully. Romano couldn't help but smile.

"Yes. Of course you can call me Lovi." Romano smiled. _Please call me anything you like if it means your memory will come back!_

Antonio's smile brightened. "Lovi, tell me about yourself!"

Romano walked down the hallway to the office room. He felt as if someone had ripped his heart out and shoved it down his throat. He felt absolutely sick. After telling Antonio about himself, leaving out the parts about the disappearances, a nurse came in. Romano talked with the nurse out in the hallway.

She told him that they didn't know weather the memory loss would be permanent or not. Romano couldn't stand the thought of loosing Antonio, though at least he seemed normal. Antonio smiled and laughed and called him Lovi just like his old self.

Romano heard the voices drifting down the hall as he turned the corner. He felt even sicker to hear them. Part of him just wanted to run the other direction but he knew he needed the others help to get justice for Feliciano and Antonio.

Romano reached the outside of the meeting room. He paused, taking a deep breath before proceeding.

He was surprised to see the others arguing over what to do about the missing countries.

"You bloody git! Ludwig probably made it to Italy if Kiku had been kidnapped after the first meeting!" Arthur yelled angrily.

"He might not have! Ludwig could have been in Germany before hand! It's been a few weeks since anyone's seen him last." Alfred yelled back.

"Yes but remember Ludwig promised Feliciano to go out to lunch with him at a restaurant Feliciano had been telling him about?" Arthur yelled.

"Yeah, so? That doesn't mean anything?" Alfred retorted.

"You guys are so childish! Obviously Romano did it!" Francis said before Arthur could reply.

"What? No way, dude! Feliciano is his brother!" Alfred exclaimed, nonchalantly waving a hand at Francis.

"Yeah but Feliciano stopped living with him to go with Ludwig. Think about it; Ludwig and Kiku took Feliciano away in a way. Feliciano was always the better liked twin and as a kid, everyone he stayed with left him or didn't want him after seeing him compared to his brother. Of course he would be close to Feliciano after what everyone did to him. Feliciano was the only one who never left him or wanted to trade him until now." Francis said.

"Hey bastardo! Want to say that to my face?" Romano demanded angrily. Everyone jumped and looked up at him, noticing him by the door for the first time. Francis' face drained of color.

"H...hello Romano. I...I didn't know you were there." Francis stammered.

"Of course you didn't! You wouldn't have the guts to say that in front of me, you bastardo!" Romano yelled. His hands trembled in anger and his face heated up.

Francis put his hands up defensively. "Romano, calm down!" he said.

"Don't tell me to calm down, you jerk! You have no clue what I'm going through! Antonio nearly died last night. What's my reason to kill him, huh? Because he wanted to trade me for Feliciano all those _years_ago?" Romano yelled, his voice rising more and more. His chest heaved with his heavy, angry breathing. He glared at Francis with an irate expression.

"Romano, I'm so sorry. I...I had no idea!" Francis said.

"Of course you didn't! You never know what's going on so you should just shut your mouth!" Romano yelled.

"Calm down, lad. Don't hurt yourself." Arthur said gently.

"Don't tell me to calm down! Feliciano's gone, someone hurt Antonio and he can't remember anything!" Romano yelled. Everything was just too much for him. He let out a sob and roughly wiped his eyes.

"Oh Lovi!" Belgium said walking over. She wrapped her arms around him in a hug. "I'm so sorry!"

Romano let her hug him but didn't hug back. He was no good. How could he expect to save anyone when he couldn't even control his emotions? Bella drew away, gently rubbing his shoulder.

"Ok." he said to collect himself. He sniffed and glared at the other countries, daring one of them to comment on his tears or vulnerability. "Last night Antonio was attacked and almost drowned in a pool when we went to go to Feliciano's house. I think someone must have been in Feliciano's house, though Antonio thought he saw Feliciano" Romano said.

"What would you like to do?" Arthur asked gently. Romano's eyes twitched. He didn't want any sympathy from him or anyone, for that matter.

"I'd like for a couple people to come with me and help me look for clues." Romano said.

"I'll join you." Arthur said.

"Me too!" Alfred exclaimed putting an arm around Arthur, making Arthur blush and elbow the American. It didn't have much force behind it though and Alfred knew, for he smiled and planted a kiss on England's cheek making the Brit blush a deep red.

"I guess I'll go check Antonio's house to look for more clues." Francis said looking at Arthur and Alfred with an unreadable face.

"I'll go with Papa." Mattie said timidly.

"Elizabetha and I will go to Antonio's house." Roderick said.

"The awesome me will go to Antonio's house!" Gilbert exclaimed with a grin.

"I'll go to Feliciano's house, aru!" Yao exclaimed.

"I always wanted Italy to become one with me!" Ivan said sweetly.

"I'll come too!" Taiwan said.

Romano smiled. "Thank you." he said quietly. Alfred jumped to his feet grabbing Arthur's wrist and pulling him up along with him.

"Let's go!" Alfred exclaimed. Arthur yelped slightly, tripping over his feet. Alfred laughed lightly and pulled him against him. Romano looked away seeing the look of affection in the Americans eyes. Seeing the two of them made Romano want to be with Antonio. He waited until Yao and Ivan left before he followed behind. Behind him, he heard the American and the Briton following after him.

Arriving at Feliciano's house, Romano got out of the car. He pushed the horrifying images of Antonio's limp form at the bottom of the pool out of his head.

"Do not worry, Romano. Antonio will get better and recover his memory, aru!" Yao said coming up beside him. Romano just nodded and walked ahead. He unlocked the front door and opened the door for everyone. Alfred and Arthur came in first, followed by Ivan and Yao.

"Search for anything unusual or strange." Romano said. "I just want to check his computer." Romano said. Everyone nodded and branched out. Alfred and Arthur hurried upstairs and Ivan and Yao looked around downstairs. Romano made his way to Feliciano's computer. He looked through several files and Feliciano's computer history. He heard steps coming down the stairs. Arthur and Alfred hurried towards him, Arthur handing him an old leather backed book.

"It's a journal. I think you should read it; I don't feel comfortable reading the lads personal thoughts." Arthur said respectfully.

Romano took the book and flipped open to the first page. His eyes widened to see "Revenge" written all over the page. He flipped to the next page and saw the same thing. He flipped to the next and the next and then quickly flipped through all the pages seeing it written all over each page.

He looked up at Arthur. "Does this look like Feliciano's handwriting?" Romano asked, not wanting to believe that his brother wrote that.

Arthur's eyebrows rose to see the comment in the journal. He glanced at the handwriting and recognized the Italians handwriting. He nodded quietly. Romano sighed, turning back to the computer with a new vigor. He found a particular folder called 'tourniquet' and opened it. Inside, he found the ingredients for a bomb and instructions on how to use it.

Romano suddenly got up and raced to the bathroom. Throwing himself over the edge, he got sick into the sink. He felt sick to think of Feliciano causing everything. He could see Yao, Ivan, Alfred and Arthur looking at the computer screen from the mirror. Another wave hit him making him get sick again. He moaned at the taste and wiped his mouth. He cupped his hands and ran the sink, sucking at the water in his palms and used it to wash the bitter taste away. He jumped feeling a hand on his shoulder. He turned around to see Alfred rubbing his back. He blinked in confusion still in a daze.

"I'm sorry Romano. I can't imagine what you're feeling but I know it must be hard for you." Alfred said gently. Romano hadn't seen the American this serious in a while.

"Just know that we're here for you. We'll get through this together." Arthur said, close behind Alfred. Romano nodded, trembling now.

"Come on. Ivan and Yao got the address to some building and we'll check it out sometime. I think we should meet up with everyone who went to Antonio's house so we can see if they found anything." Alfred said gently. Romano nodded and stood up. Arthur and Alfred walked close beside Romano like sheep dogs guiding cattle to new grazing land.

Romano still couldn't grasp the fact that Feliciano caused everything. He couldn't imagine his cute, innocent brother kidnapping and hurting so many of the closest people. He wished he could just wake up in his bed; that this would all just a horrible nightmare! He didn't know what would happen to his fratello or what his fratello was planning to do but none of them could be good. He closed his eyes tightly, wanting nothing more then to feel Antonio's arms around him.

Feliciano smirked from his office area in the government building. He had set up cameras in his house and had seen and heard everything with Romano and his little friends. Now that they knew he could get the show on the road. Everything was going perfectly according to plan. Years of his careful planning and planting and having to put up with the other countries finally was beginning to pay off. He only had a few more steps before the real revenge could begin.

**A/N:**Whoa. This chapter actually took me a while. I actually didn't like this one as much but I think its ok. I'm still in Canada; going home tomorrow(Not really. I wrote this over a month ago XD). It's been interesting(For lack of better word. DX) up here. I'm really amazed by how patriotic Canadians are. I'm really jealous. When I get back home, I'm going to go on a flag rampage, hanging American flags all over my house. I want to encourage you all to hang flags outside your house too! If you already have one, put out another or maybe hang smaller ones that are sometimes passed out at parades around your house. You can never have too many flags! Show your patriotism and love for the country you live in! LOL. Sorry, I got a little carried away. Seriously though, put out a flag, support your troops! Also to readers from the UK or London, I'm hoping you're staying safe. You'll all be in my prayers (talking to everyone now; not just people from England. Everyone can use a prayer)!

Thanks for reading and please review!


	8. Chapter 8

**Lost. Chapter 8.**

**A/N: **I really liked picking songs to fit the story for my past stories *cough* that I need to finish *cough*. So, I'm going to start adding song lyrics to the chapters. Some of them were chosen specifically for the story and others just to fit the story. I can almost guarantee you they will mostly or will all be Evanescence songs because her songs are awesome and are emo (And now I'm sad because emo wasn't in my dictionary. DX) which are basically all the songs I listen to so enjoy! If you wanna make a song suggestion or even draw fan art make a suggestion or link me the picture and I'll put a link in my profile so people can look at it! Also, I started at a new school this year so I'll try to write as often as I had but I want to focus more on my horse this year and now this year I'm taking more honors classes. Thank you for all your guys support! You don't know how much I love each and every review! 33

_**Disclaimer:**_ Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia, any of its characters or the song listed below. *is depressed now*

_Out on your own, cold and alone again  
>Can this be what you really wanted, baby?<br>_

_Blame it on me, set your guilt free  
>Nothing can hold you back now<br>_

_Now that you're gone, feel like myself again  
>Grieving the things I can't repair and willing<br>_

_To let you blame it on me and set your guilt free  
>I don't want to hold you back now, love<br>_

_I can't change who I am, not this time  
>I won't lie to keep you near me<br>And in this short life there's no time to waste on giving up  
>My love wasn't enough<br>_

_And you can blame it on me, just set your guilt free, honey  
>I don't want to hold you back now, love<br>_

Lyrics to Lacymosa by Evanescence

~*~*~

_Taiwan's POV_

After the visit to Feliciano's house, everyone reported back to the meeting room. Nothing had been found at Antonio's house other then signs of an entry and what Antonio hadn't cleaned up from Feliciano's 'kidnapping'. Everyone had been shocked with the discovery at Feliciano's house. No one could believe it had been Feliciano all along. Romano, Hungary and Roderick took the news the hardest.

Mei was worried about his younger brother, Kiku. She knew he had been close to Feliciano so he probably went to go see the Italian after the meeting. Mei winced to imagine Kiku being chained to a dark dungeon with skeletons and rats in the corners. Her poor little brother had endured much but he always had the support of someone else. Now that he was stuck in a dark place because of a person who had most of the time done the comforting in the past he must feel so betrayed. That is, if he was even still alive.

"What should we do now? We know Feliciano did it and we have an address but should we really go rushing into a building with no plan?" Roderick asked.

"Of course we should! Mein bruder's in there!" Gilbert exclaimed. Mei glanced at Romano and saw him sitting blankly in a chair. The poor guy, this must have been such a shock. It was obvious that he wasn't aware of his surroundings or didn't care because Bella sat extremely close beside him and was holding his hand. Romano just allowed her to do it, staring off into space.

"Excuse me, aru! This could be a life or death situation! If we have an address we should go, aru! Any time we waste could be their lives!" Yao pointed out.

The others seemed to consider it.

"I agree! Feliciano has obviously changed so we can't predict what he's going to do. It's best to get Ludwig and Kiku out of that building before anything horrible happens!" Alfred said. After learning of how serious the situation had been, the American had been surprisingly serious. He hadn't said 'hero' or 'hamburger' since going to Feliciano's house and he had been supportive and kind to Romano.

"What if we see Feliciano though?" Arthur spoke forward. A long silence lapsed over them. Nobody wanted to hurt the sweet Italian but nobody wanted him to hurt anyone. Romano stood up and looked over at the group, surprisingly calm.

"If anyone sees Feliciano, try to catch him without harming him. Hurt him _only_ if it's absolutely _necessary_." Romano said glaring at everyone in a silent threat. He sat back down. Bells resumed to hugging him. Romano shooed her off but she didn't listen and Romano left her go, not having the energy to fight.

"Romano," Arthur said gently. The Brit had been surprisingly kind and gentle to the elder Italian. "Aren't you going to come too?"

Romano shook his head, "No. I'm going to go see Antonio." He said his golden eyes saddening. He enjoyed his visits with the Spaniard but every time he left he felt as if he was leaving part of his heart behind.

Alfred stood up. "Ok. So now that everything's settled, everyone remember to stay on your toes and watch each others backs. Try to catch Feli without causing him any harm and rescue Ludwig and Kiku." Alfred said. No one objected and they all headed out to go to the address. Little did they know that Feliciano had purposely left the address out for them to find.

_Kiku's POV_

Silence. There is nothing but silence. Ludwig and Kiku are both too exhausted and in pain to talk. The first few days of Kiku's arrival were filled with both of their labored breathing. Then their wheezes died down to silent gasps.

Feliciano had came in once for their weekly beatings. Now, he had two people to beat so he was there twice as long. Kiku watched first as Feliciano beat Ludwig; kicking his ribs, punching his face, spitting insults at him. All the while, Kiku watched helplessly as Ludwig was beaten almost to unconsciousness by his lover. Kiku knew Feliciano beat Ludwig first so Kiku could watch and see what was going to happen to him.

Kiku knew it would hurt, but he didn't imagine the searing pain each strike would bring him. With every kick, his back scraped against the pole, aggravating his burn wounds. Feliciano punched his face. Kiku's eyes nearly rolled back but he forced himself to stay conscious. If Ludwig could then he could as well.

After Feliciano had left, both Kiku and Ludwig's breathing was even more labored. He coughed dryly, spitting up blood. He groaned lolled his head forward.

Kiku stared at the floor, not having the strength to look up. His neck and back burns hurt and the stick was rubbing his skin raw. He had only been there a few days but he was already so exhausted from one beating. He couldn't imagine how Ludwig must feel. Ludwig had been there longer then him and had been the closest to Feliciano. He felt all the pain sharper then Kiku did, emotionally and physically.

He knew Feliciano wanted all the nations to be destroyed. There was no way he can get revenge on them all without getting hurt in the process.

Feliciano must have been driven crazy by his desperate, hidden feelings. Even though he was subjecting Kiku and Ludwig to so much pain and neglect, Kiku didn't want Feliciano to suffer further. Kiku could now see past Feliciano's mask and see how he was still in so much pain. He could tell by the crazed look in his eye when he came to beat him, the force behind each blow and the tone behind his insults.

He needed to find a way to get him and Ludwig out so they could get to the other countries and warn them. Kiku knew Ludwig was mentally exhausted so it was up to Kiku to get both of them out of the building safely.

Kiku tried to think of a way to get himself out of his bounds. Once he was free, he could get Ludwig free and help him out. There would no doubt be armed guards outside the door but if they could beat them they could take their weapons. The only problem was they were both extremely weak and they didn't know the layout of the building or surrounding area or how many guards were in the building. They'd have to be smart about this and be extra careful.

The door cracked open and a figure stepped in. Kiku looked up and winced at the light. He couldn't make out the figures of the person silhouetted by the light. Kiku's heart jumped in his throat, pulsing against his neck thinking Feliciano had returned to beat them. He breathed out when the man stepped in with a bucket in his hand. He walked over to Ludwig.

Spooning a large spoon into the bucket, the man practically shoved the water down Ludwig's throat. Ludwig gagged and coughed harshly. Some of the water must have tickled his throat. Without waiting for Ludwig to finish coughing the man continued to shove the water into Ludwig's mouth.

Ludwig only coughed more spitting up some of the water into the mans face in an attempt to gag the water out. The mans face twitched in anger and he punched Ludwig's stomach. Ludwig doubled over in pain, vomiting onto the floor. The man looked in disgust and took the water away, not allowing Ludwig to rinse the bitter taste from his mouth and leaving him to wheeze.

The man walked over to Kiku and did the same to him. Kiku coughed as the dirty water flooded his mouth. It tasted like sand in his mouth but he was so thirsty that he would drink almost anything. He took a few sips before he got an idea.

He swung his leg up in a large arch gracefully and connected his heel with the mans head. The mans head hit the floor and he was out. Kiku hooked his foot around the bucket handle and drug it to him. He banged the bucket on the floor until the handle broke off.

He moved the handle in reach with his foot and picked it up with his teeth. He turned his head and dropped it behind his back, catching it in his hand. He carefully stuck the metal in between the ties and loosened the string so he could stand up on shaky legs and maneuver the metal easier. Soon he had the intricate knot figured out and had freed himself. He rubbed his wrist before moving onto Ludwig.

Ludwig slumped forward, caressing his raw wrists tenderly. Kiku bent down, wincing at his burnt skin and helped Ludwig to his feet. Kiku then searched the man for a weapon and found not only a sword but also a gun. He handed the gun to Ludwig who took it with trembling hands.

"Ludwig, we're getting out of here now but we need to be quick and help each other." Kiku said, gently slapping Ludwig's cheek to get the German to focus on him. Ludwig's eyes focused on him and he nodded. Kiku patted his shoulder awkwardly and hurried towards the door. Ludwig followed close behind him. Kiku put his hand on the door knob and counted down on his fingers from three. On zero he opened the door and jumped out.

He cut down the guard on the one side of the door. A gunshot from the other side signaled him that Ludwig got the other guard. Kiku bent down and took the guards sword and gun. He kept a hold of the sword and gave Ludwig the other gun.

Kiku pointed down the hallway to the right and hurried down the corridor. He could hear Ludwig's loud footsteps behind him. Up ahead, rapid footsteps hurried towards the two. Japan readied his sword as a group of four guards rounded the corner. Ludwig began firing at guards away from Kiku. Kiku expertly used both swords to ward off the guards; skillfully spinning and twisting as years and years of swordsmanship sprouted into his head.

Soon all the guards had fallen and there was not a scratch on Ludwig or Kiku that had been caused by them. Kiku paused to take a breather. Ludwig looked more alive then he had been earlier but Kiku could tell the German was extremely tired. He began to have doubts on their escape. Feliciano probably had tons of guards everywhere and he himself was probably somewhere in the vicinity. Kiku knew for a fact that neither he nor Ludwig would be able to hurt him, much less kill him.

"Lets continue, Ludwig-san." Kiku said. Ludwig gave him a jerky nod. The pair continued down the hall. They came upon several guards either in groups of two or three. As they neared the exit, Ludwig and Kiku sped up. Adrenaline pumped through their system, giving them the extra burst to get to the door. Suddenly, a large group of guards ran from a hallway by the door.

Kiku stopped immediately and kept his sword poised for attack. Ludwig came to an awkward stop behind him and started firing at the guards. Several of the guards rushed to attack Ludwig but Kiku intercepted them and fought them before they could even touch Ludwig. Kiku heard a low grunt and recognized it as Ludwig's. He abandoned his position to look behind him.

Another large group of guards had flanked him and Ludwig. While they both had their back turned they attacked Ludwig. Kiku quickly attacked the closest one to him and tried to get to Ludwig. No matter how hard he fought, Ludwig only seemed to get further away. Kiku's heart sinked to realize that he and Ludwig wouldn't be escaping. A flash of anger irrupted in his eyes. He wasn't going to back down. He would fight until his last breath.

He kept fighting but his movements were slow and delayed from exhaustion. He could see Ludwig from the corner of his eye and knew the German was even weaker then he was. He was aware of Ludwig's legs giving out on him as a muffled thud sounded in the hallway.

He tried to get to Ludwig's direction but a guard slammed into his back. He stumbled to his hands and knees, unable to catch the cry of pain that slipped past his lips. He tried to crawl but someone stepped on his fingers and someone else was kicking him. His arms trembled. With one last kick, he fell awkwardly to his side.

His limbs flailed, his mind unable to grasp that there was no ground beneath him. A boot rolled him onto his back and stepped on his chest. A sharp pain pierced his chest followed by a crack. Kiku gasped in pain, his yell choked, each breath hurting his chest. The guard chuckled and kicked his side making his body flood with red hot pain. He could just barely keep his eyes open. The pain was much too great.

Kiku began to feel his consciousness waver. _This is the end!_ He tried to turn to his side so he could crawl up but someone kicked him down again, sending a fresh wave of pain through his body. Kiku held back bile that shot up his throat. He closed his eyes as unconsciousness pressed on him, that or a boot.

Another wave of pain shot through him. His body was numb and he didn't know what was happening. The only thing he was aware of was that the waves of pain ceased and a gentle pair of arms carefully lifted him into a warm chest. Kiku kept his eyes closed. He unconsciously leaned against the warm chest as his savior gently rocked him like a baby.

He let out a long breath as unconsciousness finally closed over his senses like a suffocating, black veil.

A/N: Please review! 33


	9. Chapter 9

**Lost. Chapter 9.**

**A/N:** I really enjoyed writing the last chapter and this chapter. I feel like such a horrible person writing this. DX. Oh well, still fun. XD I have a feeling a few people are gonna hate me by the end of this chapter.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia, the characters or the song used below!

_Stay low.  
>Soft, dark, and dreamless,<br>Far beneath my nightmares and loneliness.  
>I hate me,<br>For breathing without you.  
>I don't want to feel anymore for you.<br>_

_Grieving for you,  
>I'm not grieving for you.<br>Nothing real love can't undo,  
>And though I may have lost my way,<br>All paths lead straight to you.  
><em>

_I long to be like you,  
>Lie cold in the ground like you.<br>_

_Halo,  
>Blinding wall between us.<br>Melt away and leave us alone again.  
>The humming, haunted somewhere out there.<br>I believe our love can see us through in death.  
><em>

_I long to be like you,  
>Lie cold in the ground like you.<br>There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you,  
>I'm coming for you.<br>_

_You're not alone,  
>No matter what they told you, you're not alone.<br>I'll be right beside you forevermore.  
><em>

_I long to be like you, sis,  
>Lie cold in the ground like you did.<br>There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you.  
><em>

_And as we lay in silent bliss,  
>I know you remember me.<br>_

_I long to be like you,  
>Lie cold in the ground like you.<br>There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you,  
>I'm coming for you.<em>

Lyrics to Like You by Evanescence.

~*~*~

_England's POV._

Upon breaking into the building, the bands of countries were met by chaos. About 15 people were all mashed together in a swirl of clothing. Some guards laid strewn on the ground with bullet or sword wounds in them. Others were swarmed around two forms near the ground.

Arthur's heart beat quickened, searching the mob of people for Kiku or Ludwig. He didn't want to think about what all these people could do to the pair especially if they were injured.

He suddenly caught a flash of dirty white near the bottom of the fury. He recognized it as Kiku's uniform. He saw a man get off the lithe Japanese man, giving Arthur a better view. Kiku's face and neck was stained with dried blood. His usually pristine uniform was soiled with blood, probably from whatever wound he sustained and possibly the people he killed, and dirt. Kiku looked extremely tired but he kept trying to fight.

In a daze, Kiku tried to get to his feet but a man slammed into his back. Kiku fell to his hands and knees. Another man stepped on his limbs and fingers but Kiku still tried to get to Ludwig. The man standing over the Japanese man drew his leg back and sent his foot into Kiku's chest. Kiku let out a strangled gasp and crashed to his side, his limbs churning feebly. The man was on him again, stepping on his chest. Kiku's feet twitched and his body went ridged. Even over the noise, Arthur could hear the crack of a rib. The man wedged his toe into his ribs making Kiku almost pass out from pain. He started kicking him again in a fury of cruel laughs.

Arthur quickly picked up an abandoned sword and hurried to Kiku. He was quickly followed by Alfred who had drawn his trusty pistol. Arthur noticed a determined fire in Gilbert's eye and a cold anger in Mei's that made him flinch. Mei and Gilbert quickly hurried to the guards. Mei killed the man kicking Japan and a few around him before kneeling down and carefully collecting Kiku's crumpled body into her arms. Kiku leaned his arm against his chest and finally passed out.

At that time, everyone else had drawn their weapon and was joining in the fight. Gilbert had gotten the men off of Ludwig but was struggling to hold them back. The ex-country was loudly swearing in German that Arthur couldn't understand nor did he really want to know what he was saying. Judging by the anger burning in his scarlet eyes and in the brutal way he killed the guards, Arthur had a pretty good guess to what he was saying.

Arthur grasped his sword tightly with the skill of a pirate and quickly joined his lover's side. Alfred quickly shot him a glance that said 'be careful'. Arthur allowed a small smile. Back to back, they fought off the men.

In the background, Elizabetha was stunning men with her frying pan, Roderick was finishing off the men she was hitting, and Mattie and Francis were fighting the guards together. Ivan was brutally crushing peoples head with his water pipe.

Soon the countries had managed to kill them or severely injure all the guards. They weren't feeling kind enough to put some of them out of their misery so they writhed on the ground, slowly bleeding out from a wound.

They all turned to look at each other. "I don't think we'll be able to leave as easily as we came. I saw a line of trees across a field; if we hurry we can make it." Alfred panted. A small cut above his eye was bleeding and the blood was running between his nose.

"Oui, that should work." Francis said nodding. The Frenchman's sides were heaving from all the strenuous exercise.

"Ok. I'll run ahead and make sure everything's clear." Alfred said.

"Good idea." Mathew agreed.

Gilbert crouched down beside the unconscious German. Ludwig had a large cut in his hairline and another above his eye and on his cheek. His uniform was stained with blood and grime. It was obvious by his skeletal frame that he had been at the building for a while. His eyes were hallowed and his cheeks jaunt. His skin looked paper-thin and pale as flour.

"Be careful with him." Arthur said frowning at Ludwig's condition.

"I know arschloch!" Gilbert said petulantly.

"Ok. Let's get moving then." Alfred said quickly as more footsteps were coming down the hall. He turned to race ahead but Arthur grabbed his hand.

"Be careful, you bloody git." he said with no trace of a smile. Alfred nodded and Arthur released his hand with some hesitation. He tried to push down the feeling of butterflies in his stomach. Something was off. He didn't have a good feeling about the situation. He told himself that it was just Alfred. The American always made his stomach feel like that whenever his skin touched his.

Mei was still holding Kiku as if Kiku would break if she held him too tightly. Gilbert was looking attentively, a fury sparkling in his scarlet eyes. The group turned and ran out of the door. Arthur glued his eyes to Alfred running about 20 feet in front of them. The American was easily running through the grassy field. His stride was long and quick, propelling him through the field. His eyes looked around the side to look for any possible danger.

There was a click and a loud boom shattered the air. An explosion went off right beside Alfred. Being not too far, the group was thrown to the ground. Bits of shrapnel reached where they were now sitting. Dust rained down on the hard packed earth. Arthur's heart thumped loudly in his rib cage.

_Alfred?_

He looked up and strained his eyes to see through the dust and dirt still in the air. The moments seemed to drag on making Arthur feel sick. Alfred had to be ok! He was the hero! Heroes never died and neither did countries so Alfred had to be alive!

When the debris finally cleared enough for Arthur to see he let out an agonized scream. Alfred's mutilated corpse laid in a heap still 20 feet in front of him. Pain of realization pierced Arthur's heart and wrenched it in half.

_Alfred! No!_

Arthur screamed again and covered his face with his dirt coated hands as screams and sobs irrupted from his body. He was only vaguely aware of footsteps racing towards him but he didn't care. He would let the guards kill him! Then he could be reunited with his Alfred!

A pare of hands tightened around his shoulders and yanked him to his feet.

"Angleterre! We need to go!" Francis' voice shouted over Arthur grief stricken screams that continuously ripped through his throat. Arthur raised his arms, trying to shake Francis off of him but Francis' grip was tight.

"No! Let me go!" Arthur screamed. Tears were running uncontrollably down his face. He felt as though his heart had been ripped from his chest and he had been left to bleed out into the grass. He wished it had been him and not Alfred: Alfred with his dazzling smile, Alfred with his sparkling eyes, Alfred with his adorable laughter. Never again. Never again would Arthur be able to see him, to hear him, touch him or love him. His Alfred was gone, gone from him forever.

Francis' voice was thick with sadness when he spoke again. "I'm sorry Arthur. Amerique wouldn't want you to die!" he said quickly. The Frenchman's heart was thumping quicker against his ribcage. He was all too aware of the footsteps getting closer. He needed to get Arthur away quickly or they would both be killed.

"What does it matter? He's dead!" Arthur shouted.

"You can't let him die for nothing!" Francis yelled, desperate to get through to the Brit. Arthur sobbed uncontrollably. Francis yanked on his arm, pulling him close to him as he ran.

"I won't let you die out here like this!" Francis said, "Maybe someday, you'll appreciate it." Arthur stayed silent. He ran past Alfred's dismembered body. Alfred's body was soaked in blood. He had been so close to the mine that his body was unrecognizable. His mutilated corpse would haunt Arthur's nightmares for many, many moons. He noticed his precious bomber jacket was gone and noticed Mattie running ahead with it.

Arthur turned his head as he ran past, his eyes not leaving Alfred's corpse as he ran. "Good bye, my sweet little Alfred." he whispered tearfully as Alfred's body got smaller until it disappeared from view.

Memories of his lover played in his mind. He saw Alfred the first day he ever laid eyes on him in the field, his head too big for his body. He was playing among the grass quietly, oblivious to all the joys and pains in life. At the time, neither knew of what fate would bring them but both were eager. From the first day Arthur ever saw him, he had though he was the most beautiful creature on Gods green earth. His eyes sparkled like the sky and his hair as golden as his wheat fields that billowed majestically in the wind. His laughter was the sweetest melody that Arthur's ears ever heard. The new child brought a joy to Arthur's long life; a joy that would light up the darkest night or the bloodiest war.

A few years passed and Alfred was a little older. He had grown into his head and he had grown taller. His azure eyes sparkled to see Arthur walking into his house. He called his name with the energy only a child could have and ran to hug Arthur's waist. Arthur chuckled and ruffled Alfred's hair. His heart always thumped hard against his rib cage whenever the American would say his name with such happiness or would hug him as if he was the most cherished person on the world. He had never experienced such a feeling before. Alfred was the first person who made him feel so loved. Alfred was the first person and maybe the only person that Arthur considered family.

Years flew by to the Revolutionary War. What had been bitter memories were now joyful. Alfred had always been so passionate about justice and freedom. He had helped to teach Arthur important lessons on how to treat growing countries and people in general. What touched Arthur the most was that Alfred had forgiven him and had loved him just the same as if the revolutionary war had never happened. Even though Arthur had been cruel to him and had taxed him, Alfred almost seemed to know that Arthur just wanted Alfred to stay with him as many people had left Arthur over his existence. The Revolutionary War always had bitter memories for Arthur but Alfred was always careful with him whenever Arthur came to visit.

More years flew by, and now it was WWII. Alfred had told him he wouldn't join in the war. Arthur was in deep trouble and in danger of disappearing as a nation. Alfred, even if he wouldn't join the war, devised a plan to try to sneak supplies to Arthur to help him. The act could have drug Alfred into the war and could have cost him civilian lives but Alfred wouldn't stand by when Arthur was hurting.

Arthur remembered Pearl Harbor and how strong Alfred had been. He grieved and hurt for his lost citizens but he pulled himself together at an unbelievable speed and made plans to attack Japan. He remembered the difficulty of Alfred's decision and the maturity he had. He hadn't been blinded by revenge as Feliciano was. He had thought clearly and eventually made the decision that would help to end the war even if he never forgave himself for the damage of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

More years flew by and Alfred witnessed 9/11. Arthur remembered how grief stricken the country had been. Yet Alfred's citizens, like Alfred, were strong. They honored their fallen loved ones and joined together to help each other through the difficult times. Terrorist attacks were always hard on a country and its people but Arthur remembered how he envied Alfred's mature handle on the matter. The day Osama Bin Ladin died had been one of Alfred's happiest moments. While it couldn't bring back those men and women who had lost their lives, it brought Alfred a little closure that the man responsible was dead.

Alfred had always been strong in Arthur's memory. Even though people said America was a shell of it's former self, Alfred would always be as strong as his strongest moment in Arthur's mind.

He turned and closed his eyes, getting tired from running and crying. His memories faded away into the background.

"We're almost to the trees. Just keep going a little longer." Francis encouraged quietly. He kept his grip on England and desperately tried to speed up to get them to safety.

Shortly, the group reached the trees. They quickly veered sharply into thick underbrush and crouched down. Arthur had stopped crying by that time but tears continued to silently streak down his face. Francis' heavy breathing warned Arthur of his appearance before Arthur saw him from the corner of his eye as the Frenchman crawled under the bush.

Francis stayed on his hands and knees but wrapped one arm around Arthur, pulling him close. Arthur leaned against the Frenchman, pressing his face into the fabric of Francis' shirt pitifully. Francis rubbed his arm gently, not trying anything perverted for once. "Shh. Calm down, Angleterre." Francis whispered. Men's voices were heard in the distance, becoming louder at an increasingly alarming rate.

Arthur's heartbeat increased again. Fear pulsed through his body causing his senses to be on edge. He was aware of every crackle in the woods, every brush of fabric, every breath of air. He could hear it all with increased senses. The men drew closer to their spot. Arthur held his breath afraid they would see them and kill them. They whispered back and forth to each other occasionally. They walked right past the countries hiding spots.

Arthur felt and heard Francis sigh in relief when their voices faded away. Everyone sat up quietly. Gilbert was still carrying Ludwig, Mei was cradling Kiku's form to her and Mattie was tearfully clutching Alfred's bomber jacket.

A warm pair of arms suddenly wrapped around Arthur's shoulders and drew him into a warm chest. It took him a few moments before his tired brain finally realized Francis was hugging him.

"I'm so sorry, Arthur." he whispered gently. Arthur sighed and closed his eyes, letting his tears soak through the Frenchman's shirt. "I thought we were going to lose you...the way you just sat there. Please, don't scare me like that ever again." Francis said.

Arthur didn't reply other then a shaky sigh.

After a few moments, someone timidly tapped Arthur's shoulder. Francis let him go so Arthur could turn around. Mattie looked into Arthur's emerald eyes. His eyes were red from crying and his cheeks were wet. He held out Alfred's bloody bomber jacket, which were in pretty good shape considering the shape of Alfred's corpse.

"Here, I think Alfred would want you to have it." Mattie said offering the jacket to him. His voice quivered slightly. Arthur gently reached out and touched the fabric. He took it and looked at Mattie for a moment.

"Thank you Mattie." he whispered. Mattie smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. The group all struggled not to cry over the loss of Alfred. His loss hit them all hard. Despite what everyone said, they all cared about the American. His presence had the ability to brighten a room. His laugh could make anyone smile and his eyes could open everyone's hearts. His absence was already felt. The cause of his death had been no comfort. Even though it was quick, the damage to his physical body had been horrifying and the fact that they would have to abandon his body was heartbreaking.

His death was a crushing blow to them, not just because he was a dear friend. Alfred was also the strongest of them all. His death demonstrated the strength Feliciano had received and the cruelty he possessed to kill one of their kind.

Alfred's death was a shock to them all, especially to Arthur, the one who loves Alfred with all his heart and soul. Without Alfred, Arthur felt lost and empty. He didn't know what to do anymore beside to get up and keep going, like Alfred would have wanted as Francis had pointed out to him.

**A/N:** Is it bad that I didn't cry when I wrote this? Does getting depressed count? I feel like such a horrible person. I almost didn't post this chapter. Just almost. DX I'm sorry! I do love Alfred, his death was kinds needed! Please review and tell me your thoughts about this chapter/story! I got some questions though:

1: Is any of the characters out of character? If yes, who and how so?

2: Is there any gaps in the story line or any parts not believable?

3: Is the writing successful in describing scenery and emotions? If not, how can I improve?

That's if for now! Arigato!


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**A/N:** Wow, double digits. *sniffs* My baby's growing up. Ah~ I feel like a mother now. Ok then~ Now that I just said that, let's continue on with the story. Ohs, I'm extremely hyper as I'm starting out this chapter but I bet you I'll be really depressed when I'm done!

Sorry, this has only been edited once so it won't be as good as my regular chapters. Sorry. 

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own Hetalia or any of its characters.

_Angel__of__darkness__  
>Angel<em>_of__darkness__  
>Don't<em>_follow__your__command__  
>But<em>_I__will__fight__and__I__will__stand___

_When__darkness__falls__  
>Pain<em>_is__all__  
>The<em>_Angel__of__Darkness__  
>will<em>_leave__behind__  
>and<em>_I__will__fight__  
><em>

_The love is lost  
>beauty and light<br>have vanished from  
>garden of delight<br>_

_The dreams are gone  
>midnight has come<br>the darkness is our new kingdom  
><em>

_Angel of darkness  
>Angel of darkness<br>The world is in your hand  
>But I will fight until the end<em>

_Hunt goes on  
>deep in the night<br>time to pray  
>down on your knees<br>you can't hide from the  
>eternal light<br>until my last  
>breath I will fight( I will fight...)<em>

_Now realize  
>the stars they die<br>darkness has  
>fallen in paradise<br>_

_but we'll be strong  
>and we will fight<br>against the  
>creatures of the night<em>

_Angel of darkness  
>Angel of darkness<br>The world is in your hand  
>But I will fight until the end<em>

LyricstoAngelofDarknessbyAlexC._  
><em>

~*~*~

_Arthur__'__s__POV_

Arthur pressed the worn cloth to his nose. While it was ripped and stained with blood, the Brit loved it just the same. If he went past the metallic tang of blood he could still smell the familiar scent of hamburgers on the jackets fabric. Arthur held that jacket as if it was the most precious thing in the world. He shut his eyes tightly and let the Americans scent wreath around him. His laughter filled his ears and behind his dark eyelids Arthur could see his bright smile and shining blue eyes.

"Angleterre?" Francis said gently. His gently voice nudged him from his daydream. Reluctantly, Arthur opened his eyes. His visions of Alfred disappeared like mist in the suns rays. Emerald eyes met with cyan eyes causing him to wince. Francis' eyes were soft as he looked at the grieving Brit.

"We must go, Arthur. We don't want them to find us." Francis said. Arthur kept silent and just looked to the side to the forest. Somewhere back there was Alfred; lying bleeding and dead and alone on that field. If he ran fast enough, the Brit could reach him. He tried to move his feet but they were heavy as if they were stuck in concrete blocks.

_Frances__POV_

Francis sighed and gently wrapped his now dirty fingers around Arthur's arm in a gentle, get firm, grasp.

Arthur trailed beside him the entire time. No one or sound had been uttered. He just stared ahead like a zombie; not quite dead but not quite living. Francis sighed. Those usually live green eyes that he had grown to love were now dull with a haunted look. Francis knew what exactly had been haunting him.

If only Francis had thought ahead to shield the Brits eyes when they ran past. Then he wouldn't have seen poor Alfred's torn and mutilated corpse. If only Francis hadn't let Alfred run ahead. The poor young country had only wanted to protect his friends and loved ones yet he had to pay his life to do so.

Suddenly, Francis felt very lucky to be alive. If Alfred hadn't run ahead and set off the mine, all of the countries might have been caught in the explosion. His heart wept to think that Alfred died for them when he might not have known he had ran straight into his death. Even worse, he could have known what he was running into and had acted normal anyway.

Looking back at Arthur, the Frenchman quickly scanned over him. His shoulders were slumped, his head staring straight ahead and his feet dragging sluggishly behind him; all of the Brits body language screamed defeat.

Francis might have under estimated Arthur's feelings for Alfred. He knew they both cared about each other but Alfred's constant teasing and Arthur's irritation for him made it uncertain to how much they cared for each other. He hadn't expected this kind of devotion from Arthur.

Arthur had never been good at showing his emotions. He could easily show irritation or anger but happiness and sadness were always boarded up by a wall. Sometimes a brick was removed and some of those forbidden emotions had leaked out but Arthur quickly rebuilt the wall to be even stronger than the last.

Francis could practically see the large towering wall of bricks looming high around Arthur; their strength guarding the Brit from any further pain and hiding his shattered heart and grief. It pained the Frenchman to think of his beloved Angleterre in so much pain. He wanted Arthur to be able to confide in him and let him in the wall; whether it be for Francis's own selfish desires for the Brit to love him as the Frenchman loved the Brit or if he truly wanted to help him Francis would argue to himself about that for decades.

Either way, Arthur couldn't stay in his zombie-like state forever. Francis needed to at least break a hole in the wall to let some of the emotion trapped inside get out. Arthur wouldn't survive long in his state. His feet were barely moving him through the woods. A gap was forming between the two and the other fleeing countries. Arthur hardly seemed to care if he got captured. He didn't seem to care about the World anymore. It was if the Brit had lost his will to live.

Francis kept his grip on Arthur's arm and tried to get him to run quicker. Every time he sped up, Arthur's feet would stumble over a root or branch and France would quickly yank him to his feet and continue running. The gap was getting wider; Francis' heart beat faster in desperation, not for himself but for Arthur. He wanted to see the Brits bright orbs again and he wanted him to regain his fighting spirit.

He was barely aware of the sounds around him. He could hear both of their labored breathing and the sound of leaves rustling or tree branches snapping under their feet. The canopy above shielded much of the suns sharp rays.

Winter was fast approaching; winds starting to pick up and the air getting a nip to it. Even though the sun was bright the weather had a mind of its own. The two stayed warm, their blood pulsing through their veins with each step.

The others seemed to notice the gap and slowed down until the gap was no more.

"Where are we even at anyway?" Ivan asked.

"Somewhere in Italy." Mei answered. He was panting from having run and carry an injured Kiku.

"Well, no duh! Where in Italy?" Gilbert snapped impatiently. Mei didn't seem to mind or notice his sharp tone.

"How should I know? We could be running southward for all I know, aru!" Yao said.

"Let's not worry about where we're running, da?" Ivan said sweetly. Both Gilbert and Yao sent him a look that clearly asked him if he was crazy.

"What?" Gilbert snapped.

"Shh!" Roderick chastised. "He's got a point. Let's just run for now. When we reach a town we can find a map and get a ride out of Italy." he said.

"Where do we go? We can't all just split up but we can't stay in Italy- meeting or no meeting." Elizabetha asked.

An idea suddenly sprouted in Francis' head. "Why don't you all stay with me!" he said. They all flashed a look at him, obviously suspecting something dirty. "What I mean is Feliciano would expect us to go to the closer countries like Switzerland or even Germany but he wouldn't think of you agreeing to go to France!"

The others thought in silence, weighing their options carefully. "Well, we need to get medical attention to Ludwig and Kiku right away, aru. We can worry about where we're going later." Yao said.

Coming to an agreement, silence, with an exception to Kiku and Ludwig's labored breathing and everyone's gasps, engulfed them.

Francis sighed, trying to think of a better idea. Russia, China, Japan, North America or England would be too far. Feliciano might expect them to go to Germany because of Ludwig, or Switzerland because of Vash's neutrality or even Spain because of his closeness to Romano.

That left them with Austria, France or maybe even Poland or Hungary if they wanted to go that far. Austria could be a possible choice. One would not expect Roderick to let them stay in his country. France would also be an unlikely choice because of Francis' perverted nature. Poland or Hungary would be too far as of now but could be a choice later on.

Francis thought deeper into which country to go to. He wanted to take Arthur to a safe, calm place so he could talk to him in private. He only snapped out of his thoughts momentarily when Arthur would trip and he would catch him and steady him so they could continue.

Finally, after what seemed like hours of running, the trees began to become scarce and the undergrowth thinned. Francis felt extra energy coarse through his legs at the prospect of going to a town.

"We're almost there Arthur! Just a little further!" Francis exclaimed. He received no reply from the Brit, though he didn't expect one.

Finally, they emerged from the trees and onto a road. Francis had never been so happy to see that black strip of blacktop before. He grinned like a giddy school girl and laughed in a high, airy voice.

"We made it! Look Arthur, we made it!" he exclaimed happily. Again, no reply. Arthur's silence didn't deter Francis' excitement. The group stopped to catch their breath quickly, walking slowly down the empty road looking for a sign. After about a mile, they came to a sign that read: "Matera- 5 miles north"

Excitement and relieve buzzed through the air. Everyone picked up their pace and hurried to the town. They finally saw the town and ran the rest of the way.

The town had been cut from a large, stone ravine. The century old buildings were large and had a very calm, Italian feel to it. Some of the buildings had been abandoned while others were remodeled and made into hotels.

They quickly located one of these hotels and rented as many rooms as they could afford. Ludwig- of course- had to stay with Gilbert and Kiku would stay with Mei. Yao would stay with Ivan and Francis would also have to share a room with Arthur and Vash would stay with Roderick. Elizabetha had to have her own room being the only girl not sharing a room.

They tiredly found their rooms and nearly collapsed from exhaustion into the soft beds. Francis and Arthur panted. There was two single beds in the room that had a yards gab between them. Francis turned his head, blowing up to move his now ratty blond hair off his dirt streaked face. His entire body felt dirty and sweaty but his feet ached too much to get up and into the shower. Besides that, he had no extra clothes to wear.

Glancing over at the Brit across the room, his heart went out to the man trying to deal with everything happening so bravely. He had just lost his lover and everything was going wrong. Yet, while he was shielding himself from the world, Francis knew that that was the only way to keep his rising emotions at bay.

The Brit was lying on his side with his back facing Francis. Francis would see his chest rising and falling to each now-gentle breath. He had pulled his knees towards his torso, his head tucked by his chest in- what Francis' guess- was him trying to smell the Amrricans scent through the blood.

Francis, being the country of love, couldn't let the person he cared about most go on suffering like this. Emotional pain was always harder to deal with physical pain since wounds almost always heal.

Rising to his feet, he only took a step and sat on the edge of Arthurs  
>Francis gently put a hand on Arthurs arm, near it's socket, and gently rubbed up and down in a soothing mannor. Arthurs body tensed slightly, expecting him to do something perverted.<p>

Francis started to sing a song in his native tongue. His soft voice and gently touch relaxed Arthur. His body became less and less tense until his breathing was as soft as the tender words sung by the blue eyed man. Francis smiled and gently patted Arthur's arm.

"I know you don't want to talk now, which is fine; just please know that I'm here for you. I know what you're going through and it hurts. It hurts more then any other pain but the pain will ease over time and you'll be able to laugh at happy memories again." Francis said gently. He remembered a human he had been foolish enough to fall in love with. Of course, she had died and much too young but even if she had been old hadn't helped his grieving heart. 

He paused, looking at Arthur who didn't appear to hear him. He sighed gently. "Just get some rest, Angleterre." he said.

Francis returned to his bed. Crawling underneath the covers, he was asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow.

_  
>Prussia's<em>_POV_

Carrying his bruder into the room, Gilbert gently laid him down in the bed. Ludwig winced lightly as each movement as he had when Ludwig had been running.

One look at Ludwig's bruised and bloody face made Gilberts stomach churn in anger. Ludwig-like himself- wasn't good at showing emotion. Certain emotions were easier then others but sentiments were not easy for either of them. They might not be close like other siblings but even Gilbert knew Ludwig possessed feelings for the small Italian. His time at that accursed building must have been more of a mental torture then physical.

Seeing Ludwig's broken and bleeding body, Gilbert decided he needed to take a bath. He went to the small bathroom and filled the tub with warm water. Gilbert tested the water with his hand to make sure it wouldn't be too hot or too cold.

He returned back to Ludwig and took off all his soiled clothes albeit his underwear. He gently picked Ludwig's thin form to him, surprised by how much more lighter he was and gently set him in the tub.

Ludwig instantly reacted to the warm water. He lolled his head to the side, a ghost of a smile crossing his features. Gilbert frowned and gently took Ludwig's chin in his hand and turned his face too look at his. Ludwig's face looked like a face of a person who was mugged. Ludwig had gotten beat up before, but never beaten and starved and never by a person he -dare he say it- loved.

Gilbert's blood boiled in his veins thinking of what Feliciano caused to poor Ludwig and Kiku. How dare he treat his bruder that way? How dare he take advantage of Ludwig's emotions?

Gilbert knew, perhaps better then anyone else that Ludwig appeared tough on the outside, much like Romano, but his was to hide his fragile feelings. He had made attachments before and only had his heart broken in the past. Gilbert feared that after this time Ludwig would shield himself from relationships even further.

Gilbert gently released Ludwig's chin and gently patted his uninjured cheek. He gently took a cloth that had been neatly folded beside the sink and used it to gently clean Ludwig's face of dirt and dried blood.

Cleaning Ludwig's face of all the grime, Gilbert was able to see the full extent of his injuries. He had many cuts and bruises on his face; particularly, a deep cut across his cheek and a black eyes. Gilbert noticed that a lot of his wounds are infected and would need medical attention as soon as possible.

Gilbert moved the cloth to Ludwig's neck and to his chest. His chest was almost covered in blue, black and deep purple bruises. Upon touching some of these bruises near a rib, Ludwig would wince. Gilbert tried to be as gentle as possible but Ludwig's skin was so brittle it was a difficult task, though not impossible.

Gilbert gently cleaned each of Ludwig's arms. Those arms that had once been strong and big were now thin and soft. Malnutrition and lack of movement had taken a toll on his body, especially his upper body. Gilbert gently rubbed the raw skin on Ludwig's wrists. The skin was so raw that it was still red and still bore the indentation of the rope.

Gilbert sighed. He gently rubbed the soft skin of Ludwig's legs, keeping them submerged in the cool water. Upon touching Ludwig's lower leg of his left leg, Ludwig let out a small whimper.

Gilbert was alarmed by this since Ludwig hardly ever showed if he was in pain. He set the cloth on the side of the touch and gently felt the knee and going lower towards the ankle, trying to find signs of an injury. He felt a slight difference on the bone beneath his fingertips just as Ludwig gasped. He stirred lightly alarming Gilbert further.

Gilbert released Ludwig's leg making a mental note of all the things he thought was wrong with his bruder.

Picking up his cloth again, he finished his task. After he cleaned his body of dirt and blood, he found a box of soup near to where he had found the cloths and gently lathered Ludwig's body that was above body with it, bring gentle in places he knew was sore.

That went smoothly since he had already cleaned his skin and checked for injuries. Next he found a small bottle of shampoo and conditioner mixed together. Squirting some into his hand, he gently messaged it into Ludwig's scalp.

He felt an irregular spot in his head and parted his blond hair until he found a rather large bump from where Ludwig was probably struck with something. Gilbert sighed and gently messaged the skin around it.

He used the cloth again to wash off his hair. Once he was sure his bruder was clean, he spread a towel on the floor and gently lifted Ludwig into it. Getting another towel, Gilbert sat behind Ludwig. Ludwig leaned his head back into Gilbert's chest. The peaceful look on the Germans face caused the Prussians mouth to curve in a smile.

Gilbert gently kissed his forehead and dried him off. He wrapped him in the towel and carried him into the bed. He settled him into the bed and adjusted the pillow under his head. Memories of long ago replayed in his mind of young Germany and of Holy Rome. Gilbert smiled fondly and chuckled.

He pulled the covers up to Ludwig's chin and gently ruffled his blond hair although being cautious of the bump. His gaze lingered on his brothers for a few more moments. Ludwig's eyelids flickered slightly.

Gilbert watched more intently and smiled. Ludwig opened his tired cyan eyes. They looked even more lifeless as though Feliciano had ripped away all his dignity.

"Yo~!" Gilbert said hoping to brighten the mood. Ludwig blinked confused and looked around.

"W-wha?" he said slowly. His voice was so low, Gilbert almost didn't hear it. Gilbert smiled encouragingly.

"You fought awesomely, bruder! Although the awesome me had to come in and save your arse!" Gilbert teased. Ludwig couldn't help but smile. It was a true real smile; not just a fake to make Gilbert happy or to make him stop worrying. Whether it was because of Gilbert's words or of the fact that he was now free, Gilbert didn't care.

"I-I'm out?" Ludwig asked in disbelief. His volume had increased and Gilbert could hear the relief in his voice.

"Ja, bruder. You're safe now." Gilbert smiled gently. With that statement Ludwig smiled broadly and started laughing lightly.

"Heh heh! I'm free! I'm finally free." he said in a gay (happy for all you people who always think sexually) manor. Gilbert smiled at his bruder's joy. Ludwig looked up at Gilbert turning serious again. "Where's Kiku?" he asked.

"Kiku is with Yao. He'll be just fine." Gilbert said. Ludwig nodded. He sighed and frowned.

"What's the matter? You and Kiku will heal and your free from whatever torture _he_," Gilbert spat the word like venom, "can't hurt you any more."

Ludwig's frown deepened. "Bruder?" he asked.

"Ja?" Gilbert asked.

"Promise me you won't hurt Feliciano?" Ludwig asked.

"Vas? After all he's done to hurt you and Kiku?" Gilbert asked outraged. Ludwig didn't flinch by his harsh tone.

"Ja. Promise me, please!" Ludwig said with more desperation. Despite everything that had happened be everything Feliciano had did, Ludwig still believed there was a way to get him back to normal. Gilbert knew Ludwig cared for Feliciano but he didn't know the extent.

"Ja." Gilbert said after a few moments. His tone wasn't his usual loud or obnoxious tone. It was gentler. "Ja, I promise." Gilbert said. Ludwig smiled in relief, closing his eyes tiredly.

"Danke!" Ludwig said. A sob escaped him. "Danke bruder."

Another sob escaped his throat and soon the dam broke. Having holding in all his emotions for as long as he did, he couldn't hold it in any more. He tilted his head down and sobbed louder.

Gilbert stood there awkwardly. He wanted to comfort his brother but he wasn't partial to hugs- it was too unmanly. Yet again, why did it matter to be manly when your usually strong bruder was crying in front of you?

Gilbert didn't hesitate after that. He gently leaned over and wrapped his arms around Ludwig's thin frame, staying cautious of the Germans wounds.

It tools few moments for Ludwig to respond. Unsteady of usually brushing his brother off, he instead wrapped his arms around the albino and leaned into his form.

"Shh." Gilbert cooed gently. He rubbed small circles into Ludwig's back. "Its alright." he murmured quietly in Ludwig's ear. He continued to repeat the phrase until he realized Ludwig had fallen asleep in his arms.

Smiling lightly, Gilbert laid him back into the bed and tucked him in again. He planted a gently kiss on Ludwig's forehead and smoothed his hair once.

"Guten nacht bruder." Gilbert said. "Sweet dreams." he said.

**  
>AN:** This one was a bit of a pain to write. My hand has pins and needles right now and I'm so FrUKing tired right now DX. BTW, I don't think I'll be able to update as much soon. My dog was put to sleep today so computer time for me might be a little slow. Any way, reviews! Review and I'll love you for eternity! 33 Arigato!


	11. Chapter 11

**Lost. Chapter 11.**

**A/N:** Well, I would have had this out sooner but when I went to email it from my notes on my iPod to my computer I accidentally deleted the entire note. IT WAS SO BIG TOO! I'm not sure if this one is bigger or not. I hope to God it is. I apologize if this isn't in the right mood because I've been listening to a lot of country songs. I'll try to use one for the song thingy one of these times. Anyway, continue reading.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia, the characters or the song below.

_I'm the one who's so in love with you.  
>I'm the one who's so in love with you.<br>Man, I'm gonna fail you all the way!  
>Oh, man, I'm gonna screw you all the way!<br>Uh!  
><em>

_Cause I'm stupid, sadistic, and suicidal.  
>Hard to accept, and that's the whole<br>idea behind my motivations.  
>Now is the part for the radio station.<br>_

_I'm the one who's so in love with you.  
>I'm the one who's so in love with you.<br>Man, I'm gonna fail you all the way!  
>Oh, man, I'm gonna screw you all the way!<br>Uh!  
><em>

_Cause I'm stupid, sadistic, and suicidal.  
>Hard to accept, and that's the whole<br>idea behind my motivations.  
>Now is the part for the radio station.<br>_

_You! do do do do  
>Take it! do do do do do<br>You! do do do do  
>This is what you want baby,<br>this is what you want.  
>And this is what you want baby,<br>this is what you want.  
>oo ah, oo a oo oo ah.<br>oo a oo ah, oo a oo oo ah.  
>oo a oo ah, oo a oo oo ah.<br>oo a oo ah, oo a oo oo ah.  
><em>

_Yo! I really mean it this time.  
>Really mean it this time.<br>Really mean it this time.  
>I really mean it this time.<br>Really mean it this time.  
>Really mean it this time.<br>Really mean it this time.  
>I really mean it this time.<br>_

_Cause I'm stupid, sadistic, and suicidal.  
>Hard to accept, and that's the whole<br>idea behind my motivations.  
>Now is the part for the radio station.<br>_

_Stupid, sadistic, and suicidal.  
>Hard to accept, and that's the whole<br>idea behind my motivations.  
>Now is the part for the radio station.<em>

Lyrics to Stupid, Sadistic and Suicidal by Mindless Self Indulgence.

* * *

><p>Italy's POV<p>

The lithe Italian sat at his desk surrounded by a mountain of paperwork. He sighed and ran a hand through aburn hair. He wasn't used to such a large amount of work. He wouldn't complain though. The more work to do; the more work he was getting done.

Despite what others would say about the Italian, Feliciano knew how to work and wouldn't complain when receiving a large work load. Feliciano didn't mind when he knew that work would take him further up the food chain. For far too long, he had been near the bottom; silently staying out of sight so he could make his plans. His plans have been long complete and perfected. It had taken a lot of time and resources to gather the man power he needed. Fortunately, many of his citizens were also waiting for the day when the name 'Italy' would make others shiver in fear.

Now, he had obtained a vast amount of followers who were all willing to sacrifice their lives for their countries. They were all careful to not make word of their increasing army to anyone who might betray them while they had been growing. So far, all has gone smoothly. Everything was going well.

Feliciano felt powerful for the first time in his long life. He had a few allies on his side who loved him as he had once thought Ludwig loved him and he had all his followers who would stay with him to the end, which promised success for him.

Feliciano hoped to make a small dent in the mountain of papers before he left the building. A small smirk tugged at the edges of his mouth. He looked forward to seeing Ludwig and Kiku tomorrow. He glanced at the clock. They usually received their water around this time. He shook his head. He needed to stay on task. He went back to the work at hand.

A knock at the door broke through the silence in the room. Feliciano didn't look up from work.

"Come in." he ordered. The door groaned, alerting Feliciano that the person entered. Footsteps proceeded to the desk at the opposite end of the room. The person stopped a respectable distance from the desk.

"Excuse me, sir?" Feliciano immediately recognized the voice as General Alfonso. He was an aged man who was brilliant with war strategies. He was tall and muscular despite being well into his forties. He suited his name well; Alfonso meaning ready for battle. Feliciano looked up at the General.

"Yes General." Feliciano responded respectfully. Amongst his men and generals, he required that they treat him with the most respect as possible and they would get respect in return.

"I have some very important news for you; good and bad." Alfonso said dipping his head in the greeting Feliciano required.

"I'll have the bad news first." Feliciano said with a sigh. It must be pretty big news if Alfonso was the one telling it to him.

"Germany and Japan have escaped." Alfonso said. He paused seeing Feliciano's eyes darken and his expressionless face twist to an irate expression. When Feliciano was silent, he continued. "They attacked the guard while he was giving them their water and they escaped somehow and used the mans weapons to attack the guards. They made it to the door and the men that had been sent to intercept them would have gotten them if it hadn't been for some unexpected guests. I haven't watched any tapes; I wanted to let you know and offer you to come with me before I did." Alfonso finished.

Feliciano was trembling in anger, "Yes, take me to the video surveillance room."

Alfonso dipped his head, "As you wish. May I warn you sir that we're still cleaning up the hallways." Feliciano waved to him impatiently and got up from his chair. The paperwork would have to wait and undoubtedly he would have more when he returned. He maneuvered around his desk. The General stepped out of his way as he walked past. The doors were opened by the guards, always present by the doors and Feliciano walked out.

"Just lead the way." Feliciano said. The General hurried to catch up with him and led him down the hallway.

At first, Feliciano didn't see anything out of the ordinary. When he turned the corner going past the room where Ludwig and Kiku had been kept he saw the first body.

He instantly recognized the man as Arduino. The man had so young and naive but so eager to fight for his country. He had a family; a wife and a young daughter. He had lived in Italy all his life. He was dedicated to his country and being very active in the gym, he had joined the army as soon as he found out their plans to instill fear into the hearts of other countries. He was kind and loyal to his fellow soldiers and friends but he was ruthless to his enemy. He had stood out to Feliciano which is why he had agreed to take on someone so young.

If you'd thought Feliciano had become completely heartless you're wrong. All the people he had loved and trusted for so many centuries had betrayed him in his eyes. He longed to be around people that would truly understand him and make him feel respected and wanted. To the Italian nation, his followers were more then followers. They were his children. They loved him for giving them a chance to make something of their lives and Feliciano loved them for their dedication.

Feliciano pressed his lips into a thin line and crouched down by Arduino. He had a single bullet wound in his chest. A quick and hopefully painless death. Feliciano barley withheld a shutter seeing his opaque eyes staring up at nothing. Feliciano let his hand rest on Arduino's head. He gently slid his fingers down his face, his fingers dancing across his cooling skin and slid his eyelids shut. Feliciano let his hand linger as he sent an Italian prayer up to God to give the man safety in the next world.

He rose to his feet. Alfonso was standing a few feet behind him with his head bowed.

"Let's go." Feliciano said softly. Alfonso dipped his head again and continued. Feliciano and the General continued down the hallway. The number of bodies increased as they went to the door. At every body, Feliciano did the same as he did for Arduino; kneeling by them and making sure their eyes were closed before sending them a prayer.

By the time they reached the surveillance room, both Feliciano and the General had heavy hearts. Even thought it was war and Feliciano and the General had seen much death, it still was upsetting to see so many young men killed. Feliciano sat down facing the TV monitor. Alfonso had the man running the surveillance tapes find the part in the holding cell of the Germany and Kiku when they escaped.

Feliciano and Alfonso watched the reply; Kiku kicking the man, breaking the bucket and using the handle to undo his ties and untying Ludwig. The two got to their feet. Feliciano couldn't help but smirk at how unsteady they were on their feet. They got weapons from the man rendered unconscious on the floor. They left the room. From that point on, Feliciano and Alfonso kept having to look from one screen to the next to keep up with what was happening.

Feliciano felt anger suffocate his insides when he saw the large band of countries enter the building and leave with Germany and Japan. How dare they unexpectantly come and take his prisoners. Granted, Feliciano planted evidence in his house so that they would know where he was but they were supposed to come to when Germany and Japan were still tied up so that Feliciano could capture them as well.

"Alfonso." Feliciano said in a dangerous tone though it wasn't directed at the General.

"Yes sir?" Alfonso said.

"You said you had good news as well?" Feliciano asked. He browsed through a few scenarios in his head but he couldn't think of anything that would make up for what had happened. Everyone had been alive when they left. A sudden thought filled his head just as the General answered.

"Oh yes. My apologies sir," Alfonso quickly said. "After they all left, they went through the training field and one of them ran into a mine. We haven't been able to identify who it was so I would appreciate it if you would take a look and see if you can help at all."

Feliciano smiled. Just as he had hoped! "Yes, I can do that. I just need you to prepare a few things for me while I do so." He said.

"Anything sir." Alfonso said.

"Since they know where we are now and we have nothing to use against them, we will need to change locations. Use the remaining men to move everything to the second building and I would like to get in contact with my _fratello_." Feliciano said.

"Yes sir. As you wish sir." The General said.

"Good. Now excuse me while I go see who is lying out in our field." Feliciano smiled devilishly. Alfonso allowed a small smile.

"Very well sir. I'll get on what you have asked of me." He said. Feliciano smiled. He could make use of this situation.

"Just keep up the good work." Feliciano said. He turned and left the room before waiting to hear Alfonso's response.

* * *

><p>Feliciano walked out onto the training field. The ground was hard against his feet. The sun was beginning to set. Soon, night would fall upon them all and the countries would be left to stay in the woods.<p>

He could easily detect where the body was from the thick cluster of men. Not only that, the sharp scent of blood filled the air.

Feliciano felt eager to go over and see who it was that was lying on the ground. He smirked and hurried to check it out.

The men parted to allow him through. Feliciano peered down at the bloody mess that had once been a person. Just as the General promised, he couldn't tell who it had been. He knelt down, not bothering to avoid the blood and leaned close to the body to get a closer inspection. He couldn't tell anything from the blood stained clothes.

"If you don't recognize him, we can always use DNA testing." One of the men informed him. Feliciano sighed. He didn't feel like waiting for the results. He wanted to find out now. Without any hesitation, he started digging around the corpse to look for any sign of recognition. Some men around him made noises of disgust but they all tried to hide whatever noises they made.

Feliciano finally found a couple hairs that hadn't been stained with blood. He nearly yells in joy seeing the easily recognizable golden hair. It was Alfred who was dead! Oh, joyous day! Alfred had been the one that Feliciano considered the biggest threat. With him out of the picture, things would go so much smoother. He hadn't planned for it but sometimes not every mistake was bad. Feliciano whipped his bloody hands on his pants and stood up.

"This man used to be Alfred F. Jones, the United States of America." Feliciano grinned triumphantly. Someone wrote something down.

"Thank you sir." Someone said. Feliciano turned to face the men.

"Anyone who doesn't have anything to do, go see General Alfonso. He will need lots of help." Feliciano said. A couple of men saluted and quickly dashed off to find the nearly middle aged man. Feliciano turned to one of his guards that always followed him.

"I would appreciate it if you to see the weapons specialist." Feliciano said. The man, Martino nodded.

"As you wish sir." He said respectfully. He led Feliciano inside the building and down the hallways which were now almost clear of bodies. In a matter of minutes, they reached the weapons specialist's room.

The weapons specialist's name was Taddeo, meaning courageous. He was a small man but was strong. He worked with his knives and guns every day and was also very talented with bombs, the reason of Feliciano's visit.

"Taddeo?" Feliciano said. The man immediately rushed into the room from a room connected to the side, most likely a lab.

"Hello sir! What can I do for you?" Taddeo asked dipping his head respectfully.

"I just need you to send a bomb to France. I don't care what kind, or where it is; I trust your judgment just send it!" Feliciano said rather abruptly.

Taddeo was taken aback at the order. "A bomb to France you say?" he repeated.

"Yes! That's what I said wasn't it? Now can you do it or not?" Feliciano asked impatiently. He had a lot of work he wanted to do as well as some people to contact so he didn't want to talk with the man long.

"Y-yes sir. I'll be right on it." Taddeo said dipping his head again.

"Good. Do it quick." Feliciano said. He turned on his heels and left as quickly as he came. He returned back to his office again. He sat back in his chair and sighed again. His plan wasn't going perfectly but this could certainly work out to his advantage. With Alfred dead, he'd have no real threat. He and his allies could take on those countries with ease. He knew from watching the tapes that he had one of his allies amongst the other countries keeping an eye on them for him. He would no doubt alert him if they were going to try anything completely against his plans.

Feliciano smirked again. Yes, he could make do with this mistake. He would get Ludwig and Kiku back and they would pay for all the pain they put him through.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Sorry that this chapter is really bad. I wanted to get it out today so that I could start writing chapter 15. Please review! The next chapter will be better, I promise!


	12. Chapter 12

**Lost. Chapter 12.**

**A/N:**Woot! My babies last year becoming a teen. Dondondon! Haha. Get it? If you don't, look up at the chapter number. Also, the last chapter made the 50 reviews mark (on FF)! Thank you so much for your support! Continue to review! Pretty soon this story will have 5,000 views on FF. I'm not sure about DA. The more people who review, the faster the chapters will come. I might be able to get two chapters a week if school and life (Yes, I have a life outside writing...called horses and my new puppy and school) allows. Usually, I'm completely against pairings of 'siblings' but I don't really could Taiwan and Kiku as siblings. Unlike Germany and Prussia and North and South Italy, they don't share the same last name. You can look at it any way you want; I'm not trying to change anyone's opinion. I'm just saying this is how I see it.

**Disclaimer:**Hikari does not own Hetalia, its characters or the song used below.

_Can you tell me, softly  
>How you'll always haunt me<br>Can you help me  
>Hold me<br>Come to me now, slowly  
>You caress me, smoothly<br>Calm my fears and soothe me  
>Move your hands across me<br>Take my worries from me_

_I will sacrifice_  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>To clear my conscience<em>

_I will sacrifice_  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>Sacrifice, sacrifice<em>  
><em>Can you feel me, solely<em>  
><em>Deeper still and wholly<em>  
><em>With your understanding<em>  
><em>And your arms around me<em>  
><em>Can you help me<em>  
><em>Hold me<em>  
><em>Whisper to me, softly<em>  
><em>Move your hands across me<em>  
><em>Take my worries from me<em>

_I will sacrifice_  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>To clear my conscience<em>  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>Sacrifice, sacrifice<em>  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>Will sacrifice<em>  
><em>Will sacrifice<em>  
><em>Will sacrifice<em>

_I will sacrifice_  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>To clear my conscience<em>  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>I will sacrifice<em>  
><em>All I have in life<em>  
><em>Sacrifice, sacrifice<em>

Lyrics to Sacrifice by T.a.T.u

* * *

><p><em>Romano's POV<em>

Spain was so much like his old self that Romano almost forgot it wasn't. Of course, it was Antonio but it wasn't the same when he had no memories. Of course, Romano filled him in as much as he could. He had decided against hiding things from him so he told him what happened at the pool.

Antonio never stopped smiling. It was as if everything Romano told him went in one ear and out the other. It frustrated the Italian to no end.

"Why do you keep smiling, bastardo?" Romano snapped harshly. It came out crueler then he had meant it but it was already said. Too late to take it back.

"You're so adorable, Lovi~" Antonio said happily. Romano sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He looked up desperately at the clock.

"I should be going." Romano declared. He stood up from the chair beside the Spaniards bed. Antonio pouted.

"You don't have to go now, Lovi." he said. Romano sighed.

"Visiting hours are almost over," he said then quickly added,"and I have somewhere I need to be."

It was a lie but he couldn't be in the room much longer. He turned on his heels going towards the door.

"See you later, Antonio." Romano said without looking back.

"Bye." Antonio said, his tone a little sadder. Romano quickly walked away. He couldn't stand being in the room for too long. Antonio was acting as if everything was ok when in fact, nothing was right. He couldn't stand the deception he felt. The Spaniard made him feel as though everything was normal and that he had nothing to worry about. After leaving the hospital reality would crash down harder then it ever did.

Ever worse, Romano lost both people closest to him. Feliciano was not his sweet, innocent fratello any more and Antonio didn't even remember him.

Yet Romano did not break down. He could not allow himself to when people needed him. A change was blowing in the breeze. Roles were switching. Antonio was relying on Romano as Romano used to rely on him and Feliciano used to be victim but now he was forcing everyone else to kneel as victims to his cruelty.

In the privacy of his car, Romano finally let out an elongated sigh of pent up emotions. He turned on the car and let the engine run. He found the low purr and soft rumble to be comforting to his ears.

The ring of his cell phone shattered the calm moment. Romano jumped in his seat; a manly scream escaping his lips as he fumbled to answer the device.

"Ciao?" he breathed into the phone.

"Ciao fratello." Feliciano's voice said from the other end of the phone.

"Veniziano?" Romano asked in disbelief. After all the fear of thinking his brother had been dead, he was glad to hear his voice even if it was uncharacteristically calm and collected.

"Why?" Romano asked quietly.

"Why what, fratello?" Feliciano asked in mock innocence.

"Don't play coy with me!" Romano snapped. "Why did you push Antonio into the pool?"

There was a pause before Feliciano spoke again. "I didn't do that, fratello."

"Yes you did, you liar!" Romano accused.

"I may have changed, Romano but I would never lie to you." Feliciano said in a heart felt manor. Romano felt even more confused but he didn't want to drive Feliciano away. He wanted to get him to come to his mind.

"Why did you call me?" Romano asked stotically.

"Don't sound so much like Ludwig." Feliciano said, spitting out the Germans name like it was poison. "I called to ask you to join me."

Silence.

"Please, fratello. We are two parts of one country. We are supposed to always be together. If you come with me you will gain much respect and we can reign together!" Feliciano said. The way he said his words with all that confidence, Romano felt a slight twinge of temptation. How many times had he longed to be stronger? To not rely on others to save him if he got in a pinch?

Romano had no intention of wanting to join his fratello but the more the idea rolled around in his head the better it sounded. If he joined him he could be with Feliciano. If he observed him he could find some way to get the old Feli back.

"Ok." Romano said.

"Ok?" Feliciano asked hopefully almost not believing his ears. Romano withheld a sigh and tried to sound convincing.

"Yes. You're my brother and I'll support anything you do." Romano said. "How should I meet you?"

"I do not want to take any chances of getting caught by any of the other countries so go to the train station. Alone. One of my men will meet you there and transport you to my new head quarters." Feliciano said.

"Ok." Romano said.

"I have already sent you the train ticket so you should receive them soon along with more detailed instructions." Feliciano said. There was a pause before he whispered "I miss you fratello."

Romano felt the hope rekindle in him. "I miss you too fratello. We all do." he said. He heard a crash in the background. "Fratello?" he asked concerned.

"See you in a few days." Feliciano said. He abruptly hung up.

* * *

><p><em>Taiwan's POV<em>

Taiwan gently carried the other Asian nation into their hotel room. She gently laid Kiku out on the bed. Her heart ached to see him in so much pain, even in his sleep. He winced with each breath, indicating a broken rib, he sported bruises and cuts all over his body, clearly deplicting the abuse he had sustained. She could also see scolded and torn skin along his back and neck.

The first thing Mei did after that was to gently unbutton his jacket. It had been ripped in some area and stained almost everywhere. Mei winced at the shoe print on his stomach. She gently unbuttoned it and took out her pocket knife to cut the arms of the jacket so that it could just be pulled out from under him when she pulled him towards her.

Kiku was left with his undershirt on. Not wanting to cut that off since that was the only clothing they brought; she carefully lifted his shirt over his disheveled head. She gently set him down on the bed. She plated a sweet kiss on his dirty forehead, blushing at his bare chest.

Mei went to the kitchen. She grabbed a towel and bowl from the kitchen. She filled the bowl with warm water and soup before returning to Kiku's side.

Kiku had not moved from his position. Mei set the bowl on the stand by the bed and dipped the cloth into the soapy water. She gently washed the skin exposed on Kiku's body and cleaned his wounds. She didn't know how to fix a broken rib so she stayed away from his chest as much as possible, with an exception to clean the scratch on his chest.

Mei then very carefully rolled him over. She felt her stomach churn to look at his back. Tears stung her eyes at the burns on his back. The burns had been rubbed off, only leaving the sensitive skin underneath. Feeling sick of the task at hand, Mei began to clean out his burn wound.

Kiku cried out quietly as she cleaned his burn. However, not being trained in the medical field, Mei didn't try anything other then cleaning it. After that, she used her knife to shred the sheet from the other bed into bandages. She felt guilty for tearing it up but she had decided long ago that she'd protect her brother at any cost.

She wrapped his burns, his deep cuts and part of his face and head where she had found a large cut on his scalp. After turning him over, she tucked him into bed and kissed his forehead.

"Oyasumi (Good night)." she murmured tenderly in Kiku's native language. She shut off the lights and got into bed. She went to bed as soon as her head hit the pillow, no longer having to worry about Kiku's safety. As long as he was with her, she wouldn't let anything happen to him.

* * *

><p><em>France's POV.<em>

Despite Francis' exhaustion, he couldn't stay asleep. It seemed that every hour he would wake up with a burning desire to make sure Arthur was alright.

For the first part of the night, Arthur was alright. He slept soundly with his back still to Francis. After around midnight, Arthur started a low murmur. His facial expression morphed into a look of discomfort. He tossed in his bed lightly, whimpering as if on the verge of tears. At first, Francis didn't take it too seriously. He hadn't expected the Brit to sleep as well as he already had considering what he had seen and been through in just the course of a day.

But his whimpers turned into quiet, tearless sobs. He clutched the precious bomber jacket to him tightly, even in sleep, and let his emotions pour out subconsciously. Francis sat up and went over to the Brit.

"Shh. Arthur, it's over now." he said empathetically. He gently rubbed Arthur's arm. Arthur let out a loud yell and turned to smack Francis' arm. Francis only tightened his grip. Arthur yelled more and twisted in his grasp, still sleeping.

"Shhh. It's alright Angleterre." Francis cooed. He carefully positioned himself over Arthur's flailing limbs and pioned him down. He continued to coo and murmur in a smooth, melodic voice.

Arthur's emerald eyes snapped open. The first thing he saw was the Frenchman's blue eyes, similar in color to Alfred's. He went limp under Francis' grip. His yells died down to a fresh wave of grief filled sobs. The loss of his precious Alfred was too much for him to bear. He closed his eyes, not wanting to see the eyes that reminded him of his lost lover.

Francis' heart broke for the man he secretly loved. Out of compassion for the man whose world had been flipped upside down, Francis gently pulled him into a hug. Arthur instantly wrapped his arms around Francis and buried his golden locks into Francis' shoulder. Francis hugged him back tightly and sang softly knowing nothing but time could ease Arthur's grief.

Arthur sobbed loudly into Francis' shoulder for a long time. When he couldn't cry anymore he just clung to Francis, imagining it was Alfred and whimpered. Francis, at that point, just rocked him gently like a child and hummed a lullaby.

When Arthur's whimpering ceased, Francis eventually drew back. Arthur leaned on the back of the bed, his opaque emerald eyes staring ahead as if in a trace. Francis' heart went out to him to see that Arthur had rebuilt the dam to hide his emotions so quickly.

He gently wiped Arthur's face of tears and let his hand linger on his face for just a heartbeat longer. He got up and smiled gently, hoping this would brighten the depressed aura emanating from Arthur.

"I'll be back, Angleterre." he said gently. Arthur didn't react to him; not a flicker of his eyes, not a nod or even a blink. Francis didn't even know how the Brit could go so long without blinking.

Francis bit back a sigh, not wanting to trouble Arthur if he did hear him. He left the room and knocked Gilbert's door. He waited patiently. He heard a slight thud behind the door followed by a muffled German swear before the door opened revealing the albino.

Francis would usually have laughed at how knotty and unkept the albinos hair was or by how wrinkled his clothing was but he knew he looked just the same.

"What's up, Francis?" Gilbert asked groggily.

"Come with me. We need to discuss things we need to do." Francis said. The albino was still for a few moments before it finally clicked in his brain. He nodded with a yawn.

"Yeah. Let me leave a note for West real quick." he said. Without waiting for an answer from Francis, the albino disappeared into his room. Within a few moments, he returned and grinned his classic grin at him.

"Let's go!" he said. The two members of the Bad Touch Trio walked to everyone else's room and got them. They decided to meet in Ivan and Yao's room since they were last to be visited. Some sat in chairs or in the bed while others stood around the room.

"Ok, so where do we go next, aru?" Yao asked.

"Mein bruder needs to see a doctor!" Gilbert said quickly looking surprisingly serious.

"Kiku needs one too!" Mei spoke up. Almost everyone murmured in agreement.

"Da, they need to be treated before we move them." Ivan said.

"Do you think Feliciano is in contact with any hospitals that they may be looking for Kiku or Ludwig?" Roderick asked. Everyone fell silent.

"Oui, that's a good point." Francis agreed breaking the silence.

"Well," Elizabetha began. "What if a couple of us go to a convenient store and buy some basic medical supplies and some food. Then we can head to wherever we're going to go."

A couple looked skeptical. "What if he's watching the convenient stores?" Roderick asked.

"I doubt it." Elizabetha said.

"Ja! We'll just have to take a chance!" Gilbert said firmly to Roderick. "Mein bruder needs help as soon as possible!"

"We understand that Gilbert but we need to think of everyone." Roderick said. "Not just one person."

"Your being over protective again! If you don't understand my situation then imagine if your precious little Elizabetha was hurt!"  
>Gilbert said getting angrier by the second.<p>

Roderick stood up quickly. "Elizabetha and I are not together! We divorced and you know it!" Roderick said. His voice softened slightly. He wanted to be the one to keep things civilized. If left up to Gilbert, things would get uncivilized real quick. "But, I understand your urgency and your impatience. I think we need to plan things carefully so no one else gets hurt."

Gilbert glared at him. "You're over thinking could cause more pain to mein bruder!" Gilbert snapped. Ludwig's quiet sobs echoed loudly in his ear. "Don't you think Ludwig's been through enough pain and suffering?" he challenged all the people in the room. No one dared to speak. "I know both of us aren't good at showing emotion but even I can see he had feelings for Feliciano!" Gilbert yelled.

Francis laid a comforting hand on his friend's tense shoulder. Gilbert flinched at his touch. Elizabetha spoke up first.

"Gilbert, I understand you care about your brother but we must think about everyone." she said matter-of-factly.

Gilbert's fury snapped. The veins in his neck bulged as he yelled, "None of you have room to talk! You all only thought of yourselves during wars! You weren't there before the second Great War when my bruder struggling to get by! You weren't there when all the hope and faith he had put in Hitler come crashing down! You weren't there when he felt all the millions of deaths caused by his leader! You only thought of yourselves. I'm his older brother and it's up to me to look after him and protect him when no one else will!" Gilbert screeched.

His face was beat red and his hands were trembling with anger. Elizabetha noticed this and gently touched his hand. Gilbert quickly jerked away. Elizabetha went to speak but Gilbert cut her off.

"Nein! I don't want to hear any of your excused. I don't care what you do! I'm going to go to the convenient store whether you like it or not so do whatever you like." Gilbert said. He mumbled to himself in German angrily and glared at the people in the room as if daring them to judge his composure. He got up and quickly stormed out of the room.

Elizabetha sighed and went after him.

"I'll go talk to him." she said quietly. She left and headed in the direction of the albino.

Francis coughed to break the silence. "Well, what do you guys want to do?" he asked. The others shrugged.

"Gilbert has a point." Roderick forced himself to admit. "If we over think this, someone can get hurt. We should just go get things from the store and leave." he said.

"Ok. Please, consider coming to stay in France. It's important we all stay together and he won't suspect you to go there." Francis said. Everyone considered. No one else wanted to offer their own countries because of the damage Feliciano could cause if he were to find out where they were all staying.

"Sounds good." Ivan said. Everyone else agreed. Roderick said he'd talk to Elizabetha about Gilbert and he'd ask a few people to go to the store. They went back to their own rooms silently.

Upon entering his room, Francis immediately noted that Arthur hadn't moved since he had woken up. His face was dry of tears and his eyes still dead. Francis got a cup of water from the bathroom and walked to Arthur.

"Drink some of this." he said gently. He gently nudged Arthur's lips with the cup. Arthur obediently obeyed Francis but didn't move any of his limbs. Francis gently tipped the glass back and let Arthur have a small sip. He swallowed absentmindedly and continued to stare ahead. Francis gave him a few more sips before putting the cup down on the table. He fixed Arthur's hair to how Arthur usually kept it and gently patted Arthur's cheek.

"Don't lose yourself." he said with an encouraging smile.

* * *

><p><em>Prussia's POV<em>

Gilbert stormed out of the room after his outburst and quickly fled towards his room. He was only half aware of the rapid footsteps behind him or of someone calling his name. A hand seized his arm and forced him back. Gilberts fuming red eyes bore into the eyes of Elizabetha. Her soft expression surprised Gilbert. Never in his long existence had she ever given him that look. The sharp words died on his tongue.

"Gilbert," she said kindly. "Please don't run off." she said.

Gilbert was speechless in shock. His mouth formed an 'o' like a fish out of water.

Elizabetha's tight grasp on his arm softened. "I know you're angry and I understand. Please listen to me and hear me out. If you take Ludwig and just run away you'll be putting Ludwig in more harm then good. You're not the nation you used to be." she said softly. Her words were like a knife twisting in his heart, "You can't defend Ludwig against everything by yourself. It'll be safer if we stay together." she said. Gilbert's eyes hardened.

"Of course I'm not the nation I was before. I'm not a nation anymore! No one would help me because you didn't think of anyone but yourself! Have you ever lost your country? It's a horrible feeling; as if someone ripped out your heart, took away all your dignity and pride. There is nothing in me except for a black emptiness and I'm not going to let that happen to Ludwig!" Gilbert said. All the feelings Gilbert had learned to push away returned. His chest felt empty, his heart turned cold and his stomach wrenched in disgust at what he had become.

Elizabetha took a step forward and cupped his cheek. "You're wrong. There is much more in you then a black emptiness." she said with a kindness and tenderness that he never heard towards him before, "When I see you, I still see the same feisty, over-confident goofball from our childhood. You hide so many things from others but you care in your own way. Every time I see your face or your grin, I think of how lucky I am that your here." Elizabetha said.

"Liz..." Gilbert began. He was interrupted as Elizabetha gently pressed his soft lips to his. Gilberts mind froze and he didn't know how to respond. Elizabetha leaned back and smiled gently.

"Please consider staying with us; if not for yourself then for your brother." Elizabetha asked. Gilbert allowed a small smirk.

"Alright." he said. He gently kissed Elizabetha's lips again. It was only for a moment but it felt a whole lifetime for the two. Never before had a situation like this came up in their histories that had affected them all. It brought out the real side of everyone, including those that were the most guarded.

Gilbert and Elizabetha parted. Gilbert searched her face vigilantly. Elizabetha's mouth curved into a smirk, her eyes looking at him teasingly.

"Not a word to anyone." she purred.

"Pfft! Like I'd tell anyone I kissed you!" Gilbert smirked. Elizabetha smacked his shoulder.

"Jerk!" she exclaimed smiling.

Gilbert smirked and stumbled slightly. He regained his balance and smiled.

"Hey watch that!" Gilbert joked. "I'm not as young as I used to be." he said.

"You're not as awesome either." Elizabetha grumbled knowing how that would make him react.

Gilbert's mouth dropped. His scarlet eyes widened and filled with a fire.

"Vas? I'm totally awesome and you know it!" Gilbert exclaimed loudly. Elizabetha chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah. Sure." she said. Gilbert narrowed his eyes.

"Liz! Gilbert!" Roderick's voice called from down the hall. Elizabetha and Gilbert quickly separated and watched as the raven haired man hurried up.

"Yo Austria~" Gilbert exclaimed grinning, having forgotten his anger.

Roderick looked between them. "He'll stay with us." Elizabetha said.

"Good. How about the three of us go to the store?" Roderick suggested.

"Awesome!" Gilbert exclaimed grinning.

Roderick's expression stayed serious.

"Yo~ I'm going to go check up on West. Just give me five minutes and I'll meet you right here." Gilbert said.

"Alright." Elizabetha said. Gilbert retreated to Ludwig's room.

* * *

><p><em>Hungary's POV<em>

Elizabetha turned to Roderick.

"What's up?" she asked.

"Nothing." the aristocrat said with the same stony expression.

"How are you about Feli?" Elizabetha whispered. Back when Italy had been known as Chibitalia had been some of the best moments of her life. Roderick had been kind to her, Holy Rome and Chibitalia had been absolutely adorable and Prussia had been irritating. Even though he had been irritating, he had been the source of all the excitement.

Roderick sighed, "I don't know." he admitted truthfully.

Elizabetha blinked sadly in understanding, "I know. It just doesn't seem real."

Roderick nodded in agreement. "I-I feel as if I messed up some how. Maybe if I had been kinder or gave him more pasta..." he drifted off.

Elizabetha swallowed the lump forming in her throat. She had often thought of that herself, that maybe if she had been kinder or offered support to him more that maybe he wouldn't have felt such hatred.

"I know. I can't help think that maybe I -we-," she quickly added so he could relate, "could have been there for him more after he left your house." Elizabetha said. A tear escaped and burned down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away with the back of her hand.

"We failed him as guardians; us and his grandfather, though Rome didn't mean to disappear." Roderick said. Elizabetha nodded. "I do not wish to be cruel to you, Liz but I don't think we should hide from the truth." Roderick said.

Just then, footsteps hurried towards them. Elizabetha quickly wiped her tears before looking up at the advancing Prussian.

"Yo~ you ready?" Gilbert asked. Elizabetha forced a smooth smile, having perfected her fake smiles over the centuries.

"Yeah," she said. "Let's hurry up so we can get out of here."

Gilbert grinned at her and started walking ahead. Elizabetha kept her eyes trained on his back.

Gilbert was just as skilled at fake smiles like herself but Elizabetha could see through his act. His grins were just a mask to hide his inner emotions that he was too 'manly' to show. She knew he was having a hard time seeing his bruder in that condition. Even worse, he had liked the little Italian as well and knew Ludwig had feelings for him.

Gilbert had raised Ludwig since a child so they both shared an unbreakable bond (though they wouldn't show it or admit it openly) that not many other brothers understood. They had fought on the same side in WWII. Gilbert had stayed with Ludwig through the hardest moments and Ludwig had comforted Gilbert after the fall of the Berlin Wall.

On the surface, Gilbert was fine but Elizabetha knew he was fragile inside and was just grinning to prevent others from caring about him. Elizabetha saw how similar his two grins were but she had an expert eye for picking the real one.

His real grin had the ability to make her heart skip a beat, to make her heart beat beneath her breast and to make her want to kiss him, not like she'd ever tell him (she wasn't going to live the previous kiss down). His fake grin made her heart sink in her chest and made her want to hit him with her frying pan so that he would start smiling for real as he claimed his awesomeness.

Elizabetha could tell that his grin was fake but yet she had no urge to smack him. She only wanted to pull him back to her and hug him tightly and never let go; though she'd never live that down either and he'd most likely try to get away claiming that hugs weren't manly. She had known she cared about the Prussian but after seeing how Feliciano had changed, she realized how much she was glad that Feliciano hadn't hurt Gilbert.

It was a mystery how Gilbert was still alive when Prussia was dissolved and the Berlin Wall had fallen long ago. It didn't matter to Elizabetha since all that mattered was that he was alive and healthy.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Fail ending is fail. I couldn't think of anything else so I tried to wrap it up there but failed as you can see. Anyway, please review! Can I be a really selfish person and ask for seven reviews? The most reviews for one chapter (on FF at least. This same version is posted on here as well as DA) is six reviews and I really want to break that record. This chapter is the longest one I think. 16 pages! That deserves an extra review or two, ne? Also, if you haven't already, you NEED to read this book called Carry Me Home by Sandra Kring! It's the best book I ever read which is quite a title! Serious, as a fellow Hetalia friend, I can guarantee you that you'll laugh your arse off and bawl you eyes out all at the same time! I had so much trouble trying not to cry but I really didn't want to cry during Study Hall. READ IT! Thankies. 333


	13. Chapter 13

**Lost. Chapter 13**

**A/N:** Noo! My babies a teen now! I never actually gave it a human name. Since the stories called Lost, I shall name my baby Larry because guy's names are cooler. Har. Also, the last chapter got 8 reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH! Anyway, continue!

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below.

_Throughout the projects  
>Throughout the projects<br>Throughout the projects_

_Bitches love me cause they know that I can rock  
>Bitches love me cause they know that I can rhyme<br>Bitches love me cause they know that I can fuck  
>Bitches love me cause they know that I'm on time<em>

_Throughout the projects  
>Throughout the projects<br>Throughout the projects_

_Done.  
>Done.<br>This is how it should be done  
>This is how it should be done<em>

_This style  
>Style<br>Style  
>Done<em>

_Pow!_

_Muthafucka..._

_Pow!_

_Bitches love me  
>Bitches love me<br>Bitches love me  
>Bitches love me<br>Bitches love me  
>Bitches love me love me love me love me love me<br>Bitches love me  
>Bitches love me<br>Bitches love me  
>Bitches love me<br>Bitches love me cause they know that I can rock_

_Done.  
>Done.<br>This is how it should be done  
>This is how it should be done<br>This style  
>Style<br>Style  
>Done.<em>

Lyrics to Bitches by Mindless Self Indulgence  
><span>

~*~*~

_Romano's POV_

Just as Feliciano promised, he received the ticket to the train station the next day. He didn't know where he was going other then some part of Italy. He had packed all his clothes, unsure of what to bring.

He didn't go visit Spain. He couldn't bear to see his face and not tell him what he was doing. He was scared; scared of what Feliciano would be like and what he would do to him.

He sighed and wheeled his bag out to his car. He got in and sighed. He began to have second thoughts on this new choice. The others would surely think that he was joining Feliciano's side. He should probably tell them what he was doing. But if they tried to convince him not to do it, Romano feared that he could be talked out of it. He didn't want to go but he felt that if he didn't, that he would be dooming Feliciano to be attacked by the others. He couldn't let his sweet younger brother get hurt, even if he deserved it.

Putting his own problems beside, he turned the car on and turned the radio on loud so that it could mask his thoughts. He gripped the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles turned white and drove to the train station. He quickly handed his ticket to the ticker man. He barely was aware of anything until he stepped onto the train's platform and waited for the train. He hated waiting. That was when all his thoughts came back to him.

What if Feliciano had changed too much? Would he hate Romano? What if everything he said about missing him on the phone was a lie to get him to come to him so he could kill Romano? Romano knew he wouldn't have the guts to kill Feliciano and Feliciano must know it too. But surely since they were both Italy Feliciano wouldn't hurt him, much less kill him.

Luckily, he didn't have much time to wait before the train chugged into the station, blowing smoke. Romano waited until it rolled to a stop before he boarded the train. He took a seat. Feliciano had been kind enough to buy him first class but that again could just be a ruse to get Romano to trust him. Romano didn't particularly like trains. Trains were noisy and bumpy. Granted, he hadn't been a train in a very long time. This train was fairly smooth and wasn't as noisy unless it blew its whistle.

Romano uttered a string of Italian curses. He was probably walking right into a trap. How stupid was this? Feliciano was probably sitting back where he is and laughing his butt off thinking of what a gullible idiot Romano was. Romano wouldn't stand a chance if Feliciano started fighting him. He stood up about to get off. Just as he did so, the doors shut tightly and the train creeped forward, steadily picking up speed. Romano groaned and watched the scenery go by.

Well, he was screwed now. He'd have to go on with it or somehow try to sneak out after he got off the train. He sighed.

What if this wasn't a fake? What if Feliciano really did miss him? Romano didn't want to admit it but he missed his fratello as well. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to go. If he went and Feliciano did kill him then at least he died trying to make a difference.

Romano sat back down in his seat. There was only a few other people in the same cabin so it was quiet. Romano looked out the window at the passing scenery. No doubt, Feliciano represented Italy's beauty. Everyone always commented on how cute Feliciano was. The only one who ever thought Romano was cute was Spain and that seemed too biased since Antonio raised him.

_Look at the bright side,_ Romano thought, _if you die then no one will have to put up with my loud swearing or angry temper any more. Everyone will be happy._

Romano leaned his head against the seat, getting more depressed the more he looked at the beautiful scenery. He sighed and closed his eyes.

"Excuse me, sir?" a polite voice asked a few minutes later. Romano blinked his eyes open, grumbling incoherently.

"What is it, bastardo?" he snapped. The woman, dressed in a work uniform, blinked in surprise.

"Where's your ticket?" she asked trying to stay polite even though Romano could tell she wanted to say something smart to him.

Romano rooted through his pocket and brought out his ticket. He gave it to the lady who thanked him, even though it sounded fake or even sarcastic to Romano. The bad tempered Italian just grumbled and leaned back in his seat. He soon fell asleep and the trip flew by in the blink of an eye.

_Still Romano's POV_

Romano woke up as the train stopped. He looked out the window and noticed the train had stopped and was at the station. He stood up, stretching from his nap and picked up his bags. The doors were already open so he just walked out. According to the letter that had came with the tickets, Feliciano had sent some of his followers to go to the train stop and pick him up.

Romano set his bags on the ground and looked around. Feliciano had said that they would find him. Sure enough, a group of big men wearing suits were standing by the sides. They spotted the Italian and walked over.

"Lovino Romano Vargas?" the one man asked gruffly. Romano gawked at how tall and muscular they were.

"Y-yes." He stammered. He internally swore at himself for sounding so small and incompetent. The men allowed a small smile.

"Very good. Mr. Vargas has been looking forward to seeing you." One man said, "My name is Gosto."

"And I am Fosco." The other man said. Romano just stared at them, not knowing what to say. He picked up his bags.

"Are we ready?" he asked.

"Let me take your bags, Mr. Vargas." Gosto said bending down to take them from Romano. Romano glared slightly but gave them up. He still didn't feel confident that Feliciano wouldn't hurt him but he'd just have to wait and see.

"A-alright." Romano said, mentally beating himself again for stuttering.

Fosco and Gosto smiled. It kind of creeped Romano out, "There is no need to be nervous."

"You wouldn't say that to yourself if I was smiling in the creepy way that you both are now." Romano snapped.

"Mr. Vargas was right about his temper." Fosco said.

"Yes. It's very amusing." Gosto laughed. Romano growled.

"I'm not amusing, you dumb bastardo!" Romano snapped. Fosco and Gosto only laughed at him more. Romano growled and balled his hands into fists, wanted to show them both not to laugh at him.

"Sorry, Mr. Vargas. Let's go. Mr. Vargas is probably getting impatient." Fosco said. All the Mr. Vargas was confusing Romano.

"Just call me Romano." The Italian grumbled.

"Yes, Mr. Vargas." Fosco said. Romano sighed and slumped his shoulders.

"Kill me now!" he grumbled lowly.

_Still Romano's POV_

Romano arrived at a quant house. When the car rolled to a stop, Romano stepped out and went to the door without waiting to hear any instructions from Fosco or Gosto. Those two had been driving him insane the entire half an hour car ride. He knocked on the door as Gosto came up carrying his bags. Fosco was driving the car to the garage around the back.

Another man answered the door. Gosto shouldered past Romano. "Show him to Mr. Vargas." Gosto said to the man. The other man, much taller then Gosto and more muscular too. Romano gulped as the man looked down at him. The man turned and around and went into the house. Romano decided that must mean to follow him. He walked inside, closing the door behind him.

He gasped at the interior of the house. The wood floors had been polished and were shining in its pristineness. Beautifully crafted mahogany tables and desks were in some of the rooms and fragile vases stood on pedestals near the wall and frescos and paintings hung from the wall. Everything was absolutely stunning.

"This way." The man said in a deep voice. Romano quickly hurried after him, going up the stairs to the second floor.

"Mr. Vargas?" the man said.

"Yes?" Romano heard Feliciano's voice say from a room.

"Your fratello is here." He said.

Romano heard a chair leg move on the hardwood floor. Feliciano came to the door way and grinned.

"Fratello!" he greeted him warmly. Part of Romano sighed in relief while another part stayed on guard. He forced a smile to his mouth.

"Hello Feliciano." He said trying to sound happy to see him.

"Come in. I'm sure you're tired from the trip." Feliciano said motioning him into his office. Romano came in. He was surprised at the huge mountain of paperwork on Feliciano's desk.

"Wow! You sure got a lot of work!" Romano commented.

Feliciano shrugged, "Everything comes with a price, yes?"

Romano smiled, "I guess so." He sat down in a chair. Feliciano smiled at him happily.

"I'm so glad you've decided to join me! You don't know how excited I am. You won't have to do any of the paper work. You'll just be in charge of our allies and you'll run the missions. I might attend but I'm only planning to go to the big ones." Feliciano said.

Romano sighed in relief. So Feliciano wasn't planning to kill him after all…that made him relax. "Ok. So who are our allies?" he asked curiously. Realizing now that Feliciano had allies made curiosity knawl at him.

"Yes, of course we have allies. We wouldn't be able to win this on our own." Feliciano said. He chuckled. "Do not worry. They might seem like good allies but like us, they are underestimated and determined. They have all passed my test and they will be excellent fighters. You shall meet them very soon." Feliciano said.

Romano withheld a gulp. If they were as good as Feliciano made their allies out to be then the others might be in some serious trouble. Maybe he should have contacted them and told them what he was doing so he could tell them what Feliciano was planning. He was beginning to think that he couldn't change Feliciano's mind, especially after Feliciano put forth so much effort into his plan.

"Are you ok, fratello? You don't look so good?" Feliciano asked. Romano nodded.

"Si. I feel fine," Romano said, "Just tired."

"Oh. I should have thought that. I'll let you take a nap. We can talk more later." Feliciano smiled.

"Grazie." Romano said getting up.

"Your room is the one at the end of the hall to the right. Make yourself comfortable; what is mine is yours." Feliciano smiled. Romano got up and left, not bothering to say anything. Feliciano could just think he was really tired. He found the room and laid on the bed. He sighed.

_Please God, let me convince Feliciano to stop. _

Romano was more tired then he thought and fell right asleep.

~*~*~

_England's POV._

After returning to the hotel, everything had passed in a blur. He could barely recall when he had fallen asleep, only noticing sleep when horrific, detailed images painted his dreams.

Over and over again, he saw Alfred's body get blown up. He was again overwhelmed by emotions; panic, a minuscule hope and grief of the inevitable that he didn't want to face. He felt himself fall to his knees. Sobs ripped through his throat. He gripped his hair with his hands and squeezed so hard that his knuckles were as pale as a ghost.

"Stop! Oh please God; make it stop!" Arthur sobbed quietly. He looked up, hoping that, somehow, he had been taken out of the field.

His heart sank to the hard ground seeing the same grassy field with the tree line. This time, Alfred was standing still and facing him. The look on Alfred's beautiful features caused Arthur's heart to twist in pain.

Alfred's beautiful azures looked at him sadly, accusingly. His posture was defeated, opposite of his usual confident stance.

"Why?" Alfred asked in a whisper. When Arthur didn't respond he continued. "Why didn't you stop me? Why would you let me run ahead like that? You promised me when I was young that you wouldn't let anything hurt me!"

Arthur was confused. He never said anything like that.

"What? Don't you remember?" Alfred asked harshly. 

"...I-I..." Arthur stammered quietly.

"I should have known you wouldn't remember; you don't love me." Alfred sighed. "I had a nightmare and you told me you'd never let anyone or thing hurt me. You broke your promise and I'm dead." Alfred spat venomously.

Arthur quickly scrambled to his feet and took a step forward.

"I'm so sorry, Love. You know I love you! If I could, I would take all your pain!" Arthur said desperately. He couldn't let Alfred believe he didn't love him.

"Your already too late for that. I know you knew something bad would happen but you let me go anyway. You let me die!" Alfred said. Arthur felt his heart beating rapidly on his chest, reverberating in his head.

"N-no. I didn't!" Arthur said in a whisper. He could feel his own eyes widen. Desperation flowed through his veins. _Alfred, I didn't kill you!_

"Yes you did!" Alfred yelled angrily. His beautiful azure eyes darkened in anger. His face grew beat red in anger, "You killed me, you murderer! I hate you, you lying, backstabbing, piece of crap!" Alfred yelled in rage.

Arthur stumbled back, his palms covering his ears. He shook his head slowly. "No. No no no no no! I didn't kill you; I love you." he said quietly. His closed his eyes. _This is all a dream! It's not real!  
><em>

"Stop saying that! If you truly loved me, you wouldn't have let me die!" Alfred said. He paused then continued, angrier then ever. "Look at me, Arthur!"

Arthur looked at Alfred timidly. He screamed loudly. Alfred's body, still standing, was covered in blood and grime. His beautiful golden hair was now tinted red. His blue eyes were dull and bloodshot. His pristine face was streaked with scarlet blood from deep cuts all over his body.

Arthur fell to his knees again and crouched low, gripping his head. "No. Please! No no no no no!" he sobbed loudly. He heard an explosion and felt a warm liquid splash against his cheek making him scream and jump away with suck force that he fell onto his back.

Keeping his eyes closed shut; he felt a firm grip on his arms. Someone was holding him down. Panic choked the air from Arthur's throat so his screams were muffled and forced.

He then realized the person holding him pinned was speaking to him. The voice was that of a mans and was low; soothing Arthur's worries and comforting his grief. He noticed that the touch wasn't sharp or painful but rather forceful yet gentle; as if the person was trying not to hurt him.

Arthur snapped his eyes open out of his dream. He was immediately met with blue eyes. For a moment, Arthur thought it was Alfred and that everything had been a dream but then he noticed long curly blond hair and no Nantucket.

Unable to hide his emotions and still shaken by his dream, Arthur started sobbing again. He closed his eyes again, not wanting to see those kind eyes that reminded him of Alfred's.

Francis gently pulled the Brit into his chest and wrapped his arms around his back. Arthur immediately responded by hugging the Frenchman tightly and grasped the fabric of his shirt so tight that his knuckles turned white. Arthur allowed himself to imagine it was Alfred holding him so tenderly. His heart ached when the Frenchman started singing a song. Though it was meant well to comfort him, it only reminded Arthur that Alfred wasn't the one holding him?

His heart seemed to ache almost physically, the pain almost too much to bear for him. He never knew how great his love for the American was until he was gone. If only he hadn't let his pride get in the way so many times. Then he could have told the American how much he loved him. If only he had stopped Alfred and ran ahead himself. Then Alfred would still be alive.

Francis gently rocked him. Arthur cried until he couldn't cry anymore. His arms slackened and his grip weakened. His body sagged into Francis'. Arthur was only aware of the sharp ache in his chest.

Though the pain was great, he still felt dull. He couldn't bring himself to focus on the world around him. What was the point now that Alfred was gone from his life? Arthur had to live the rest of his long existence without the American laugh and his smile and his touch.

Francis leaned him back, not that Arthur noticed. His awareness was still trapped within his mind.

Stray tears continued to leak from the Brits dull eyes. Arthur, though he didn't react, felt Francis' hand gently wipe his tears. Electric pulses shot through his body at his simple touch. How could suck a simple action mean so much? Arthur's heartbeat accelerated and thumped against his chest though his facial expression remained stotic.

"I'll be back, Angleterre." Francis said gently. Arthur didn't blink or make any movement to acknowledge him.

Francis' footsteps faded down the hallway, leaving Arthur alone in the room.

Why didn't you stop me? Why did you let me die? You said you would protect me? Why did you lie to me? Don't you love me?

Alfred's haunting whispers echoed in his head. He knew it wasn't really Alfred but the truth behind the words was just too real.

If he had a bad feeling, then why didn't he not let Alfred run ahead? If he really wanted to protect him, then why didn't he protect him? If he really loved Alfred then why did Francis' touch make his body feel as if tiny electrodes were racing through his veins?

Arthur felt as though he was detached from his body. He wanted to get up and make some tea to comfort his nerves but his legs wouldn't budge. He wanted to thank Francis for everything he was doing for him but the words died on his tongue.

Maybe it was better this way. Whenever he came back to his senses he always broke down. Just when he thought all of the tears were gone, fresh tears would ambush him. The grief was still too raw. His heart ached and his arms longed to embrace his boy but Alfred was never coming back.

Why couldn't it have been himself instead of Alfred? Why did Feliciano want to kill them? Why did it have to be Alfred of all people? Alfred had the strength and the guts to end all their problems yet he was ripped from them all so suddenly.

Thoughts like these reverberated through Arthur's head until Francis returned.

Francis came in and surveyed the room quickly. His gaze scanned Arthur's quickly. Arthur's thoughts re-grouped to Francis. Where had he gone? Did he go see the other countries? Did they discuss their next move? Arthur wanted to voice these questions but his lips wouldn't form words.

The sound of rushing water emanated from the kitchen, shattering Arthur's thoughts and catching his attention.

Francis came back into the room holding a cup of water.

"Have a drink." Francis said. His tone was soft like that of a mother to a sick child. He gently nudged Arthur's lips with the cup and tipped the cup. Arthur slowly drank the liquid. He tried to move his arms to hold the cup but his arm wouldn't budge. He stared straight ahead at the blank wall in front of him.

When Francis was satisfied by the amount of water he drank, he set the cup down. He used his hands to fix Arthur's hair. Before any of this mess happened, Arthur would have yelled at the Frenchman or at least worry about what he was doing to his hair but Arthur felt more trust towards the French country. His face remained stotic yet he adored the feeling of Francis' soft touch in his hair. His fingertips occasionally brushed against his forehead, sending involuntary shivers down his spine.

When Francis finished, he smiled and gently cupped Arthur's cheek with his hand.

"Don't loose yourself."

Then something about him changed. Almost by the drop of a hat, the Frenchman's eyes narrowed to slits. His eyes shut tight and his mouth gaped in a silent scream. Francis' hand clutched his chest and he collapsed to the floor

Fear gripped Arthur's chest. He was immediately snapped out of his trance. He scrambled from the bed, to where Francis was writhing on the floor. His hand clasped around the Frenchman's hand, which was already pale and clammy. Francis squeezed it tightly.

Arthur's heart beat rapidly in his chest. _What was happening?_ His heart jumped into his throat making it hard to breathe. He didn't want to loose the Frenchman too. His shattered heart broke further. Poor Francis was in so much pain. His entire body was rigid and trembling. His skin was extremely pale. His facial features reflected the agony of whatever he was going through; his eyes shut tightly and his mouth parting only to allow the pained gasps out. Pained gasps were all he could manage.

A dread loomed over Arthur. Francis' free hand was tightly clutching his chest. Memories of the bombing in London flashed in his mind. Could Francis have been bombed?

"Francis?" he spoke softly at first. When the Frenchman didn't hear him he spoke louder; his words laced with fear and forcefulness, "Francis?"

Said man cracked his eyes open. His sky blue eyes warmed ever so slightly to see Arthur.

"Bienvenue a la maison, en Angleterre." Francis croaked out weakly. He closed his eyes, all strength ebbing from his body as unconsciousness consumed him.

A/N: Yay! Another chapters finished. Review and you shall be forever loved!


	14. Chapter 14

**Lost. Chapter 14**

**A/N:** I thought I should clear things up. I translated the French on Google translate and it is infamously unreliable but it'll have to do. -_- Anyway, it should have said "Welcome home, England". A lot of people were confused by that but you might understand if I told you why. But what fun would that be? Interpret if how you'd like. I'd love to hear your interpretations though. Also, some people are confused about what happened to Spain. You'll find out what happens later on in the story. Thanks so much for the reviews! I love all of them!

**Disclaimer:** Hikari doesn't own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below.

_I hate feeling like this  
>I'm so tired of trying to fight this<br>I'm asleep and all I dream of  
><em>

_Is waking to you  
>Tell me that you will listen<br>Your touch is what I'm missing  
>And the more I hide I realize I'm slowly losing you<br>_

_Comatose  
>I'll never wake up without an overdose of you<em>

_I don't wanna live  
>I don't wanna breathe<br>'les I feel you next to me  
>you take the pain I feel<br>waking up to you never felt so real  
>I don't wanna sleep<br>I don't wanna dream  
>'cause my dreams don't comfort me<br>The way you make me feel  
>Waking up to you never felt so real<br>_

_I hate living without you  
>Dead wrong to ever doubt you<br>But my demons lay in waiting  
>Tempting me away<br>Oh how I adore you  
>Oh how I thirst for you<br>Oh how I need you  
><em>

_Comatose  
>I'll never wake up without an overdose of you<br>_

_I don't wanna live  
>I don't wanna breathe<br>'les I feel you next to me  
>you take the pain I feel<br>waking up to you never felt so real  
>I don't wanna sleep<br>I don't wanna dream  
>'cause my dreams don't comfort me<br>The way you make me feel  
>Waking up to you never felt so real<br>_

_Breathing life  
>Waking up<br>My eyes open up  
><em>

_Comatose  
>I'll never wake up without an overdose of you<br>_

_I don't wanna live  
>I don't wanna breathe<br>'les I feel you next to me  
>you take the pain I feel<br>waking up to you never felt so real  
>I don't wanna sleep<br>I don't wanna dream  
>'cause my dreams don't comfort me<br>The way you make me feel  
>Waking up to you never felt so real<br>_

_Oh how I adore you  
>Waking up to you never felt so real<br>Oh how I thirst for you  
>Waking up to you never felt so real<em>

_Oh how I adore you, ohhhh  
>The way you make me feel<br>Waking up to you never felt so real _

Lyrics to Comatose by Skillet

_England's POV_

The TV hanging in the corner of the room was the only thing breaking the silence. The Frenchman laid on the white hospital sheets, his pale skin nearly matching the white color of the blankets. His chest rose and fell with each of his breathes that seemed to rattle in his chest. He still hasn't woken up.

Beside the blond haired man sat a golden haired man. He was tightly clutching the other mans hand. It was tight but not uncomfortable. The man stared down at the Frenchman's facial features while listening to the TV and glancing up every so often.

The TV screen depicted of the horrors that had been struck at Paris, France. An Italian bomb had hit the capital at the time when Francis' collapsed.

Thousands were dead and thousands were injured. The beautiful city of Paris lay in ruins, now a ghost of its former glory. The Eiffel tower had been damaged. It hadn't collapsed but each pillar was twisted and bent making it look like a heap of metal. A thick, choking smoke suffocated the clear blue sky, hiding it behind its black veil.

Arthur had stopped watching TV after the first few hours; he found the images too disturbing. He had forgotten how long he had been in the same position but it didn't matter; he just wanted to be near Francis.

He continued to hold Francis' hand. Besides an occasional squeeze or stoke of the clammy skin beneath his own, neither moved.

The minutes stretched to hours. Arthur's eyelids grew heavy. He knew others had visited Francis earlier but he had been too deep in thought to notice. He knew Gilbert had visited after he returned from the convenient store. He vaguely remembered seeing Roderick but he couldn't be sure. He was only sure of Gilbert from his loud mannerisms and the hard smack on the back he received when he didn't answer the albino's question.

A nurse came in to check on Francis and to insert some liquids into his IV bag. She was kind enough to turn off the TV for Arthur. 

Arthur didn't respond to any of this. It all passed by like it did at the hotel, before France was bombed.

Arthur felt sick to the stomach thinking of the Italian bomb that had destroyed Paris. Before, Feliciano had only attacked the personifications of the countries, albeit the small bomb in the cafe in Italy. Now he was attacking innocent people. He was completely out of his mind now. He honestly couldn't expect to be allowed to bomb a countries capital with no warning or even declaration of war.

As much as Arthur detested the idea, he knew he had to convince the other countries to form an alliance with him and take down Italy by any means necessary. Regardless, they would have to be careful that Romano wouldn't be hurt but it could work.

A fresh anger flared in the pits of Arthur's heart.

Feliciano started this mess.

Feliciano captured Ludwig and Kiku.

Feliciano abused them and mistreated them.

Feliciano _killed_ his little Alfred.

Feliciano bombed Francis' capital.

Now he must pay.

Arthur's days as an empire might be over (at least for now) but that didn't mean he wasn't strong. He had the motivation. All he needed to do was put forth some effort and he could achieve anything.

Arthur pressed his lips to a line and blinked his eyes into focus. No more feeling bad for himself and no more hiding from reality. He had to accept that Alfred was dead. Thinking those words caused his eyes to sting with tears but he knew he couldn't just expect to forget about Alfred. He didn't want to. He wanted to hold onto him for as long as he could but he knew there was a time when he had to let Alfred go. He could love him and honor his memory but he had to let go.

He looked to the Frenchman's blank features. He smiled softly and chuckled warmly to spite himself.

"You know, I've been a real jerk." Arthur said. He waited, half hoping France would respond.

He didn't.

"I've decided I want to get revenge on Italy. He almost took away two of the most important people in my life- well he already took one- and I won't let him get away with it." Arthur took a breath.

What good would that do? That might only provoke Feliciano more but he couldn't just allow the Italian to get away with all the deaths he caused. This called for war!

"I'm so unsure what to do though. I-I need Alfred. I know you're probably tired of hearing about Alfred but I can't let him go. I want to, I really do but it's just so hard to say good bye when I'm not ready. I don't think I'll ever be ready though so I guess it's now or never, eh?" Arthur sighed again. Sighing was becoming more of a habit now, "I pray nothing will happen to you, Francis. You've been great to me lately and I want to be able to thank you for that like a proper gentleman."

Arthur paused and his lips formed a line again. What was Francis to him? Is he an old enemy, a friend or...more then a friend? He and the Frenchman squabbled in much of their history but that didn't mean they always had too. The past few days, Francis had been so supportive. Arthur had felt as though his life was a cup of tea on a balancing  
>beam. The tea represented how calm his live used to be. When Alfred died, part of his life balance was tipped so severely that his tea spied and his cup shattered.<p>

Francis was never to far away to pick up his pieces and up him together. But like Humpty Dumpty, he couldn't be put back together again, or at least not the same as he had been. His life wouldn't be complete without Alfred but Francis filled much of the void that Alfred made behind. Arthur just had to open his head and let him in so he could fill that void in even more then he already had.

Arthur laughed lightly but it sounded flat to his ears, "You've been strong, so strong; your people, yourself, everything! I've never seen such fast reacting. I hope they can start rebuilding soon so you can get better. It's not right being able to talk like this with you. I could never say all of this unless you were asleep.

"But I guess that's a bad thing though. I did the same thing with Alfred and now I'll never get the chance. I don't want to make the same mistake with you."

The Brits lips curved into a smile. He was beginning to understand things better. Talking his thoughts out loud really helped him to realize what he was truly thinking. As long as Francis was asleep, it wouldn't hurt to talk to him.

"I've been trying to figure out my feelings for you. I know we're friends but you've been so kind to me that I've been sensing a deeper meaning. I feel guilty for thinking about this after Alfred's dead. I feel like I'm cheating on him and replacing him and I don't want to do that. I know I should be able to love other people and still honor his memory but it...it still feels like he's alive. I'm just waiting for him to burst through that door and laugh again." Arthur let out a quiet half laugh, half cry. He'd never hear his Alfred's laugh again.

"I don't want to use you either. I can't help but think that I'm just looking for a re-bound. It's...sick. It's absolutely revolting. Why can't I be a normal person and wait to fall in love for someone else after their soul mate dies? It hasn't even been 24 hours and I'm already looking to replace him. God, I feel so unholy." Arthur finished in a whisper.

He stiffened at a muffled moan. He looked up from the random spot he had been staring at. Emerald met with sky blue.

"You're not unholy." Francis croaked. "Don't even think such a thing. I know you love Alfred and you're taking his death so hard that it hurts to see you in pain that I can't help you with."

Arthur blushed darkly. His mind was in a tizzy. He didn't want Francis to hear him! Of God this was embarrassing.

"Francis..." Arthur drifted off.

Francis' gently took Arthur's hand and gave it a weak squeeze. "You're so strong, yet you don't see it. I know how Alfred's death is eating you away on the inside and you try to mask it but you can't fool me. I know the pain won't ever go away. It'll get easier to deal with as more and more time goes on but you'll never truly forget. The bond between you to is too great. A-Arthur," Francis took a breath. "I love you. I've loved you for a while but I knew I could never get between you and Alfred even if I wanted too."

A choked sob escaped from Arthur's throat. Francis could see the dam was starting to crumble. Arthur squeezed his hand back tightly and shut his eyes tight in a desperate attempt to seal the cracks.

"Angleterre, if you feel the same, I'll wait for you until you're ready to let someone inside your heart again." Francis said softly.

Arthur let out another sob and brushed his tears. Francis smiled softly. He enveloped Arthur into a heartfelt embrace. Arthur immediately responded and hugged back. He hid his face in Francis' shoulder and sobbed loudly.

Soft hands rubbed soothing circles into the British mans back. This simple yet meaningful gesture caused the golden haired man to cry even more. Now wasn't the time to worry Francis. The French nation already had so much to worry about. It should be Arthur comforting Francis, not the other way around.

"Its ok, Angleterre. Get everything out; I'm here for you." a soothing voice whispered in Arthur's ear. Arthur hugged Francis as tight as he could without hurting the injured man.

A hand drifted up from his back to stroke his short locks. The sobs echoed through the empty room.

They stayed like that for what seems like hours but was in reality only a few moments. Francis scooted over and tugged the British man onto the bed, who did so with no hesitation. He always hated crying since it always made him feel so open and exposed but after he was done he felt so refreshed and rejuvenated like each tear was one pound of baggage being dropped from his tired shoulders.

Arthur curled in on himself and tucked his head in between the crook of Francis' neck. Francis had to be careful at how he treated the Brit. He took one of his hands and gave it a reassuring squeeze. He didn't let go.

"I'll always be here for you, Angleterre."

"I know." Arthur whispered tenderly. "How do you feel?" he asked.

"It hurts." Francis said truthfully, "But not as bad with you here."

A blush blossomed on Arthur's cheek. His eyes flickered away embarrassed.

Francis chuckled warmly, a new warmth spreading through his chest. This was different from the last and felt very pleasant.

"Get some rest, Angleterre. You look tired." he smiled.

Arthur pouted much like a child being told it was their bed time.

"But..." he began.

"Ah ah ah!" Francis said using his other hand to wave his finger like a parent might to a naughty child. With him, it was a warm gesture. "No buts. I know what bags under peoples eyes look like and those are them." he said poking playfully at the tender skin under the Brits eye causing him to let out a small chuckle. It was music to Francis' ears. It was the liveliest sound Arthur had made since Alfred's death.

"Fine." Arthur grumbled putting a playful frown on his face. Francis smiled gently.

"Good boy. Now get to bed. I'll be right here when you wake up. I won't let any monsters get you." he smiled. Arthur blushed a vibrant red. A low chuckle rumbled from Francis' throat.

Arthur closed his eyes. Within a matter of minutes his breathing deepened and evened out, signaling to Francis that he was asleep.

_France's POV_

The agonized screams pierced through the blackness of Francis' unconsciousness. Everything was pitch black. Francis had no senses other then sound. The high pitched screams of pain, every last breath and the frantic cries and pleas from the loved ones of those deceased.

The sounds went straight through Francis' head. His unconscious self cringed. The noises felt as though they were cracking his skull in half. They traveled from his head to his heart. His heart ached to think of all of his citizens lives who had been shattered because of his 'younger brother'.

Somehow, amongst all of his screaming citizens, he heard Arthur sobbing right beside his citizen. They were sharing the same devastating pain of loss; they were all hurting and crying together gave them strength. Strength that they weren't alone. That they had someone with them.

The voices of his people faded until it was just the Brit. Arthur's sobs morphed to whimpers. Francis called his name out, wanting to find a way through the impenetrable darkness and comfort him.

A second voice crescendoed as the whimpering began to fade. Fear flashed through Francis.

_No, Angleterre! Don't go!_ Francis thought desperately.

Reality hit him like a rock. Conscious did not slowly come to Francis.  
>The sharp ache of his chest slammed against his chest and the pounding in his head didn't stop. Though all of his inner voices had died away, he still heard a voice.<p>

Francis squinted his eyes in confusion hearing the same voice in his dreams. It had been Arthur that was speaking? When Arthur's cries had subsided it had been his own voice that had masked everything else,

Francis kept his eyes closed, not wanting to alarm him or silence him.

"I've been trying to figure out my feelings for you. I know we're friends but you've been so kind to me that I've been sensing a deeper meaning. I feel guilty for thinking about this after Alfred's dead. I feel like I'm cheating on him and replacing him and I don't want to do that. I know I should be able to love other people and still honor his memory but it...it still feels like he's alive. I'm just waiting for him to burst through that door and laugh again." Arthur whispered.

Francis felt his heart go out to the Brit. He didn't want him to feel any guilt about what happened. He already had too many emotions to deal with without adding guilt to Arthur's defeated shoulders.

"I don't want to use you either. I can't help but think that I'm just looking for a re-bound. It's...sick. It's absolutely revolting. Why can't I be a normal person and wait to fall in love for someone else after their soul mate dies? It hasn't even been 24 hours and I'm already looking to replace him. God, I feel so unholy." Arthur whispered; his voice quivering slightly like he was fighting back tears.

Francis wouldn't stand to let the golden haired man think he was alone any further. He opened up his eyes, immediately blinded by the lights. He groaned silently. Arthur turned to look down at him just as Francis looked at him, forcing his eyes to adjust to the light.

"You're not unholy. Don't even think such a thing. I know you love Alfred and you're taking his death so hard that it hurts to see you in pain that I can't help you with." France said to him weakly.

Francis, had the situation were not so serious, would have laughed at the blush on Arthur's face.

"Francis…" Arthur let his voice trail off.

Francis reached out and took Arthur's hand despite the pain it brought to his chest. "You're so strong, yet you don't see it. I know how Alfred's death is eating you away on the inside and you try to mask it but you can't fool me. I know the pain won't ever go away. It'll get easier to deal with as more and more time goes on but you'll never truly forget. The bond between you to is too great. A-Arthur," Francis blushed. Should he really go through with this? Was it still too early for the Englishman to bear? "I love you. I've loved you for a while but I knew I could never get between you and Alfred even if I wanted too." Francis said before he would stop the words from leaving his mouth.

_Oh crap! Oh crap!_ What would he say now? Would he still think that Francis was a pervert? Would he think Francis was weird and just saying that so he could take advantage of him while his mind was so weak?

Arthur let out a sob. For a moment, Francis felt guilty for making the man cry. Hadn't he already shed too many tears? Then he realized that the dam was starting to break. He knew that Arthur would never be able to move on with his life until he let the dam down long enough to let someone else in. They both squeezed each others hand.

"Angleterre, if you feel the same, I'll wait for you until you're ready to let someone inside your heart again." Francis said gently. He knew he might have to wait a while or he might not have to wait much but he would wait because what he said was true; he's loved Arthur for a while and he wanted to be with him. He would wait if Arthur wanted him to.

Arthur lets out another sob. Francis can practically see the bricks of the dam falling away. He gently pulled the golden haired man to him. Arthur hugged him back quickly and buried his face in Francis' shoulder. Arthur's shoulders shook as sobs wracked his tired body. Francis cooed lightly and rubbed his back. Arthur cried louder, touched that the Frenchman cared for him so much.

"Its ok, Angleterre. Get everything out; I'm here for you." Francis whispered in his ear. Arthur hugged back firmly though Francis could tell he was trying to be careful with him. Francis smiled gently and stroked Arthur's hair.

After a while, Francis decided that Arthur wasn't going to calm down soon and was probably uncomfortable. He moved over in the bed and tugged Arthur into it. When in the past, Arthur wouldn't stand being in the same room alone with Francis let alone a bed, Arthur crawled right in. He trusted Francis more not to be perverted. Francis smiled as Arthur curled into him carefully and nuzzled his neck in between Francis' neck and shoulder.

Francis was no fool. He realized how careful he had to be around the British man. He couldn't touch him to much or Arthur would think that he wanted him right then but he couldn't touch him too little or Arthur would suspect that he was in pain or that he was lying about loving him.

Francis gently found Arthur's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Arthur smiled gently and squeezed it back. Francis looked into Arthur's handsome face. He remembered seeing the absolute terror and shock when Francis had went down. He never wanted to see that face again. He wanted to see him smile for him and laugh that laugh that he only did with his fairy friends.

"I'll always be here for you, Angleterre." Francis whispered.

He got what he wanted; a simple smile.

A/N: Yay chapters done!

Omg! I'm sooo ticked right now it's not even funny! If you already don't know this, I write my stories in school in study hall or on the bus on my iPod. My last period class, this dude was making fun of my friends! Omg I'm so ticked that I started yelling at the dude. And since the teacher is like, my best friend (Seriously! We're tight yo!) and we both have horses she stuck up for my friends. The guy who made fun of them ticks me off. He needs to realize that he has no real friends and that no one even likes him! Gah! Sorry, I just really need to rant! I hate people so much so much! Not you guys obviously. I'm not saying that just because you read my stories but because you're all so wonderful and lovely. I'm gonna stop now before I give myself a heart attack. Thanks for letting me rant. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Review please. 3


	15. Chapter 15

**Lost. Chapter 15.**

**A/N:** I forgot to post this on FF. Two chapters ago a couple records were beaten. We reached the 5000 views mark and went past 70 reviews. Even more records were beat the last chapter. Over 6000 views, the most reviews for one chapter (10 reviews!) and we reached the 80 reviews marks! I love you all soo much! Seriously, even if you don't review and you're reading this I LOVE YOU!

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own any of the characters in Hetalia or the sound used below.

_Have I been blind?  
>For the first time in my life I feel I've opened up my eyes<br>Since you've arrived like an angel from the sky  
>I'm on a spiritual high<br>_

_So don't you ever go away  
>I could never face<br>Losing you would kill my faith  
>In a higher place<br>_

_What kind of world  
>Would it be without you<br>I couldn't breathe without you here  
>What kind of world<br>Would I see without you  
>I can't dream without you here<br>_

_Yeah woah yeah  
><em>

_Beautiful boy  
>How on earth did I do something worth deserving you?<br>My better half  
>How I cherish through and through every part of you<br>I do  
><em>

_Loving you's made me whole  
>Now I belong<br>I found my heart  
>Promise me we'll always stay<br>The way we are today  
><em>

_What kind of world  
>Would it be without you<br>I couldn't breathe without you here  
>What kind of world<br>Would I see without you  
>I can't dream without you here<br>_

_Hey-yeah  
><em>

_I can't ever imagine  
>If this never would happened<br>I thank God everyday  
>Almost lost you forever<br>But I always remember (remember)  
>That you're my saving grace<br>_

_What kind of world  
>(what kind of world)<br>Would it be without you  
>(oh without you)<br>I couldn't breathe without you here  
>(ohh here)<br>What kind of world  
>(what kind of world)<br>Would I see without you  
>(oh see without you)<br>I can't dream without you here  
>(dream without you here) <em>

Without You by Christina Aguilera  
><span>

_  
>Germanys POV<em>

Ludwig's dreams were filled with nothing but blackness. He was not aware of anything but sleep. No dreams, no sounds. Just nothing.

Though he might have wanted to see happier moments with Feliciano, he was partly glad of the nothingness. He wouldn't have to be teased of times that will never again happen.

His sleep refreshed his tired body. When he woke up he realized that he was alone in what looked to be a hotel room. His mind tried to recall the last moments before he passed out. With much difficulty, he was able to remember escaping from his prison along with Kiku.

He sat up weakly, only to have pain shoot through his chest. He quickly sank back down to lessen the pain but it was for naught.

He wondered if maybe Feliciano had recaptured him and put him into the hotel. He looked around in hopes of seeing Japan. Instead, he saw a note in the desk beside his bed.

He forced himself to sit up and ignore the pain in his chest as he reached out and snagged the note from the desk. He quickly read over the note hastily written by his brother telling him that he was going out to get some things from a convenient store.

Ludwig narrowed his eyes. What was his brother doing here? He didn't remember seeing anyone albeit the swarm of guards that were beating him up. He then remembered the previous night when he woke up and talked with Gilbert who had hugged him despite how 'unawesome' and 'nonmanly' hugs were. He always was very protective of him though the former country would never admit it.

Ludwig couldn't help but smile. He was very happy to finally be out of that building. He wasn't sure how many more of those weekly beatings he would be able to take. He could already feel how much his body had weakened and he could see plainly by looking down at the small mount of covers that was his body that he had lost much weight and muscle since he came into Feliciano's 'care'.

He would miss seeing Feliciano though. Even though he had hurt him in so many ways he still loved the Italian. He knew he shouldn't but he couldn't help but fall in love with him after all the times they spent together. He might not be perfect or his ideal person but he was who he loved and who he was attracted to and no one could ever make him stop loving Feliciano.

A light laugh escaped Ludwig's split lips thinking of happy memories with said Italian. He remembered back many years ago when it was his birthday. At the time, he was being punished for his deeds in World War II and was being held in a jail cell until his fate was decided.

Feliciano hadn't been allowed to see him but he had somehow snuck in. He went up to Ludwig's cell with a huge grin plastered on his face; a smile that lighted up the entire dark room.

"Happy birthday, Ludwig!" Feliciano exclaimed happily.

Ludwig had looked up glumly. He had lost the war that he had believed so much in. Even though Feliciano had betrayed him (and not that Ludwig could blame him) he had came to visit him in a place that he was obviously uncomfortable in. Despite the cheerful features, he could see an edgy look in his chocolate eyes if he didn't cover it up with happiness quick enough.

"Why are you here, Italy?" Ludwig asked in a monotone voice. He didn't feel there was any reason to try and be happy when he was to be divided and his bruder dissolved.

"I snuck in to see you!" Feliciano exclaimed tilting his head slightly in a way that made the Germans heart thump against his ribcage.

"You snuck in?" Ludwig asked curiously.

"Si! I wanted to see you so I asked to see you but they said no so I snuck in!" Feliciano exclaimed.

Never before had Ludwig ever felt so touched. Even after all of the horrible things he did, Feliciano still wanted to be with him. Even enough so to sneak in. Ludwig kept his face expressionless.

"That's nice of you, Italy." Ludwig said.

"Ve~ I brought you some presents too!" Feliciano said. He handed Ludwig a wrapped gift with a card through the bars. Ludwig took them gently and opened the card. Inside, Feliciano had drawn a picture of the two of them. The artwork took his breath away. It was such a beautiful picture; exquisitely detailed with Feliciano's talent and style. Ludwig folded the card gently.

"Danke Feliciano." he said softly. Feliciano giggled.

"Silly, you need to open your present next!" Feliciano exclaimed.

Ludwig set the card aside and opened his present. Inside was a small stack of dirty magazines as well as some food, mainly some liverwurst and some sweets. Ludwig quickly scarfed down the food and blushed at the magazine.

"T-thank you, Italy." Ludwig said.

Feliciano grinned, "Ve, I'm glad you liked it!"

"Ja. I loved it." Ludwig said. He blushed and turned his head getting embarrassed. Feliciano giggled. He had to leave afterwards before anyone realized he had been down in the cell but after he left, part of his light stayed behind making the cell not seem as scary as it had been.

Ludwig sighed and smiled at the memory. He missed the old days greatly. He never realized how much he loved the Italian until after he had lost him in a sense.

He knew there was no way of getting the old Italy back. To much hate had consumed him and too many countries would have grudges on him. Ludwig squeezed his eyes tightly and blink the memories away from his vision.

He needed to get out of the bed and take his mind off of Italy. Nothing good will happen from sitting in bed feeling sorry for himself. No doubt Kiku was hurting as well. It wouldn't be a bad idea to look around and see if he could find Kiku or someone else.

Ludwig pushed the blankets to the side. Pain shot up his leg when he tried to put his legs to the side. Ludwig's hand shot to his leg with a surprised gasp.

Almost on cue, a noise sounded from the door. Ludwig froze, instinct taking over. His brain shouted at him that it was Feliciano who had come back to kill him.

Footsteps walked down the small hallway that led into the hotel room. Ludwig couldn't see the person from the angle he was at. Just a few more steps.

A bag rustled as the door was closed. Ludwig's breath caught in his throat, his heartbeat thumped hard against his aching chest.

Gilbert came into view. He looked at Ludwig and grinned, "Hey Luddy!" he exclaimed. "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Ludwig forced himself to swallow his heart, "I-I'm fine, bruder." Ludwig said.

Gilbert sat down on the bed beside Ludwig. He sat the bag beside him.

"Liz and I went to a pharmacy. I'm going to tend to your wounds now." Gilbert said rooting through the bag.

Ludwig was silent.

Gilbert opened up a roll of bandages. "You can't fool me. You're not alright and I wouldn't expect you to be after all that you've been through. I don't want you to hold things in but I also don't want to force you to talk to me. Just know you can talk to me alright?" Gilbert said.

Gilberts skilled fingers wrapped the bandages around his deep cuts that still needed to heal. He wrapped his chest to help the broken bone as well as his leg.

"I know bruder." Ludwig said quietly.

Gilbert put medicine on the wounds that weren't deep enough for bandages. When he finished he grinned at Ludwig.

"I bought you some crutches but since you'll heal quickly your bone should be nearly healed in a day or two." Gilbert said.

"Can I see them bruder? I'd like to go see Kiku." Ludwig said.

"Ja. Last I know Kiku was still sleeping but we could always go talk to the others first and then go see Kiku." Gilbert said.

"Sounds good." Ludwig said. Gilbert got up, setting the bag on a table opposite the bed. He disappeared down the hallway where the coat hanger was and where he had rested the crutches against the wall.

Gilbert handed the crutches to Ludwig and gripped his shoulders in a firm yet gentle grip. He helped Ludwig sit up and position the crutches under his pits.

Ludwig stood up. Gilbert stayed to his side in case he fell.

The two of them walked down the hallway to the room where the others were still meeting in. Gilbert was surprisingly patient and helpful with his little brother. He seemed to know when Ludwig would stumble and would steady him on his feet again.

Gilbert knocked on the door. After a few moments, Roderick answered the door. The volume from inside the room grew as the door opened. The countries constant arguing was deafening in Ludwig's sensitive ears.

Roderick held the door open for Ludwig and Gilbert.

Once the door was closed Gilbert shouted, "Will everyone just be quiet!"

Somehow, he gained their attention. A couple of them stared at the Prussian. Ludwig sat down on a chair and watched as his brother sauntered in.

"I'm hoping there is a good reason for all of this yelling?" Gilbert said. "You guys are yelling so loud I think you made my ears bleed!"

"Gilbert," someone began. Immediately, Ludwig's heart sank. The tone of which they spoke to his bruder warned him that something horrible had happened, "Italy bombed France."

The room was silent for a few moments. Ludwig could hardly believe it. He couldn't grasp himself around the idea that his sweet, peace-loving Italy would bomb another country.

"V-vas?" Gilbert asked. Ludwig winced at how shattered his voice seemed. Gilbert was close friends with Francis. The two of them, along with Antonio, had formed the Bad Touch or the Bad Friends Trio. With Antonio being hurt, and now Francis being bombed Gilbert was practically the only one left. Ludwig didn't know about Spain at the moment though. "Where was he bombed?"

"Paris." someone said solemnly. Gilbert just stood there, his face not betraying what he must be thinking. Even Ludwig who could read Prussia like a book couldn't see what he was thinking.

Elizabetha walked over and put a gentle hand on his shoulder, "Sit down. You look pale." she said. Gilbert was usually pale but that was besides the point.

Gilbert shook his head defiantly. "N-nein! I'm too awesome to sit." he said.

"If you insist..." Elizabetha said.

Ludwig looked around the room observing everyone in it.

"Ludwig," Gilbert said softly. Ludwig turned his attention back to his brother who was having a hard time thinking of how to word what he was going to say next, "Since you've been gone, Feliciano has pushed Spain into a pool and caused him to lose his memory. He also," Gilbert paused. He didn't want to be the one to tell Ludwig that the person he loved was a murderer. Elizabetha thankfully stepped in.

"Feliciano killed Alfred when we went to rescue you and Kiku." she said in a serious tone that was rarely heard spoken from any of the countries other than Ludwig.

Ludwig- he was shocked. He stood as still as a statue unable to comprehend what he had been told.

"Feliciano is insane!" Mattie exclaimed from the back. His voice was laced in pain. Feliciano had taken his brother away from him and had hurt his Papa.

"He isn't Feliciano anymore! Our Feliciano wouldn't do this, aru!" Yao interjected.

"He should be stopped before he hurts anyone else, da?" Ivan said sweetly.

This caused an uproar again, this time Gilbert took part in it. Some said that Italy needed to be stopped immediately but others still denied that it was Feliciano's doing.

Ludwig stayed silent, still comprehending Alfred's death. Feliciano wouldn't kill anyone; he didn't have the guts for it. But what about Antonio and Francis? Why would he hurt his brothers? They might not be brothers like Romano and him but they were his brothers nonetheless.

Was Feliciano really savable? Could he go back to the way he was or had the need for revenge poisoned his heart and turned it to stone?

"...wig? ...udwig? Ludwig?" Gilbert exclaimed loudly. Ludwig blinked away the distant look in his eyes and looked at his bruder's scarlet eyes.

"Ja?" he said, monotone.

"What are your thoughts?" Gilbert asked.

"On what?" Ludwig asked.

"O for Jesus Christ... what are your thoughts for how we should deal with Feliciano?" Gilbert repeated. Ludwig quickly scanned the room, realizing that everyone was watching him.

"I don't know, Gil." Ludwig said quietly. "Maybe now he's gotten all of his hateful feelings out and just needs some time to cool down."

"Luddy," Gilbert said sympathetically. "You and I should know better than anyone that peoples hate doesn't deter with one kill. If anything, it grows and their lust for blood intensifies."

"And even if he has calmed down, he can't go unpunished." Roderick said. "He's hurt far too many people to do so."

Ludwig stated silent. Gilbert put a hand in his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"You don't have to take part in any of this. We all understand how you're feeling so you don't have to harm Feliciano in any way." Gilbert said.

"Bruder?" Ludwig asked.

"Ja?"

"You said you wouldn't hurt him remember?" Ludwig asked.

Gilbert blinked but nodded, "Ja." he said softly. "I remember and I will not touch a hair on his pretty little head."

Gilbert ruffled Ludwig's blond hair gently, staying aware of the scratches on Ludwig's scalp.

Ludwig stayed silent as the other countries finished the conversation. Gilbert offered to walk him back to their room so Ludwig wouldn't have to hear how the other countries planned to hurt his sweet little Italy but Ludwig shook his head.

It was finally decided that they first needed to focus on getting out of Italy and on getting Francis help and proper care for Ludwig's and Kiku's wounds. Once they got to Austria, where they had decided to go when they escaped, they would make official plans to deal with the Italian. They also had to take Romano into consideration since he wasn't on Feliciano's side even though they were two halves of a whole.

Ludwig felt so cold and empty inside his chest. It felt as though his heart had been ripped out of his chest and had been replaces by a cold stone weighing down on his chest. He carried his burdens silently, though everyone knew he was having inner turmoil. No one wanted to pressure the German into a subject that would obviously be very painful for him to talk about so they let him go.

They let his thoughts go to wander and drift to happier times and happy memories that could have happened if they had noticed something was wrong with Italy.

They were all monsters. Monsters for turning their head away from the Italian. Monsters for turning Feliciano into a cold blooded killer. Monsters for wanting to harm and potentially kill their creation.

It all made Ludwig sick. His belly kept doing flips and his hands kept twitching involuntarily. He wanted nothing more than to wake up and realize this was all a horrible dreams but if he had a penny for every impossible thing that he wanted, he would be a rich man.

****

**A/N:** Ludwig will go see Kiku in the next chapter. Or I might just leave that out. I need to double check what plans I had made. Thanks for the reviews and please R&R for this chapter. Reviewers will have my undying love!


	16. Chapter 16

**Lost. Chapter 16**

**A/N:** Ok, not really much to say other than hello and happy 11-11-11. It's passed already but oh well. Just deal with it.****

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the songs used.

_I hurt myself today  
>To see if I still feel<br>I focus on the pain  
>The only thing that's real<br>The needle tears a hole  
>The old familiar sting<br>Try to kill it all away  
>But I remember, everything<br>_

_What have I become  
>My sweetest friend<br>Everyone I know,  
>goes away<br>In the end  
>And you could have it all<br>My empire of dirt  
>I will let you down<br>I will make you hurt  
><em>

_I wear this crown of thorns  
>Upon my liar's chair<br>Full of broken thoughts  
>I cannot repair<br>Beneath the stains of time  
>The feelings disappear<br>You are someone else  
>I am still right here<br>_

_What have I become  
>My sweetest friend<br>Everyone I know  
>goes away<br>In the end  
>And you could have it all<br>My empire of dirt  
>I will let you down<br>I will make you hurt  
><em>

_If I could start again  
>A million miles away<br>I would keep myself  
>I would find a way<em>_  
><em>

Lyrics to Hurt by Johnny Cash.

_Germanys POV._

Gilbert had seated himself beside Ludwig. His shoulders were touching his bruder's but neither seemed to mind. Gilbert shot a glare to anyone who looked at Ludwig, reminding the blond of the bruder that had raised him back when Gilbert was in the Teutonic Knights.

Ludwig was too much focused on what the others were saying about Italy that he didn't notice his own pain. Gilbert must have noticed that Ludwig's hands kept twitching, fore every time they would twitch the older of the two would clasp his hands tightly around Ludwig's until they became motionless.

Ludwig, while he couldn't feel his own pain, could very easily feel the pain that hung in the air. Alfred's death still hung heavily in the hair and the bombing on Paris was still a shock to them all. Ludwig felt it the worst. Everyone felt some sort of guilt for potentially causing Feliciano for being this way but they know it was Feliciano who chose to make those decisions.

They knew that it wasn't their fault for what happened. Many people on the earth feel as Feliciano does yet only a few made the choices Feliciano did.

Ludwig however, felt as though everything was his fault. He was the one who was closest to Feliciano. He was the one Feliciano called out to help for the loudest and he was the one who ignored him. If he had been the one person who noticed Feliciano's pain, then he could have helped Feliciano deal with everyone else and Alfred's death and the destruction of Paris could have been avoided.

Unfortunately, what's done was done and nothing could be taken back. They couldn't avoid dealing with the situation any longer. If they did, more innocent people and possible some of their own kind might die.

The realization of knowing that Ludwig had lost Feliciano and wouldn't ever get him back was almost enough to crush his already shattered heart. He kept his facial expressions impassive though the others knew he was heartbroken.

Ludwig could feel his hands beginning to shake again. Gilbert glanced at his hands again and covered them with his own. He gently messaged the thin, paper-like skin with his thumbs. Ludwig forced himself to relax and stop his hands from shaking. Gilbert let his hands go, neither of them wanting to show the others too much emotion or vulnerability. They both kept their facial expression smooth ad the other discussed their plans for Feliciano.

"What should we do? With all of allied we can easily take him on! This will be a quick war and there will be no need for anyone else but Italy to get hurt!" Roderick said. No one could bring themselves to call Italy by his human name anymore. They were having a hard enough time thinking of him as a bad guy.

"I don't think it would be that simple." Matthew said softly.

"Yeah, he probably has allies as well that we don't know about." Elizabetha said, actually hearing Matthew for once.

"Ok..." Roderick said. "Then why don't we give him a warning. If he doesn't surrender then we'll bomb him."

"It's already past that point!" Mei exclaimed. "He didn't give any warning to Ludwig, or my brother, or Antonio, or Alfred or Francis!"

"I agree with Taiwan. I think we should just blow him to bits." Ivan smiled.

"Where are you getting at Taiwan?" Mattie asked.

"I'm saying that it's time we took control of this situation. We can't let him win this war!" Mei exclaimed. Several people opened their mouths to respond to her comment but were interrupted.

There was a knock at the door. Mattie went up to get it. Ludwig's hands started shaking again. Gilbert takes Ludwig's hands silently.

"Arthur?" Mattie said in surprise.

Ludwig glanced up surprised. One of the last people he expected to be here was England. He suspected that he would want to avenge Alfred's death but with Francis in the hospital, Ludwig thought he'd be with him.

Arthur came into the room, looking timid. "Um...Francis said it would be a good idea if I talked with you guys." Arthur said.

"Get comfortable then!" Elizabetha said cheerfully, trying to lighten the mood.

Arthur allowed a small smile and walked in. His usual proud shoulders were slumped in defeat and his emerald eyes had lost their luster.

Ludwig looked away when Arthur glanced at him. He couldn't help but feel bad. He felt responsible for Alfred's death and Francis' hospitalization. Despite Gilberts hands around his, his hands shook harder.

Gilbert messaged his hands harder while staying gentle. He glanced at Ludwig's face, quickly scanning for any sign of illness. Ludwig knew his older brother was starting to worry but he couldn't get his hands to stop shaking.

"What are you talking about?" Arthur asked quietly. He sat down quietly in the chair.

"We were discussing how we should deal with Feliciano." Roderick said matter-of-factly.

Arthur didn't respond.

"Ok!" Elizabetha said recollecting the group. "Do you have anything you'd like to say, Arthur?"

Arthur shook his head quietly.

This surprised Ludwig. How could Arthur not have an input to deal with the man who killed his lover and severely injured his best friend?

From the corner of his eyes, Ludwig saw Arthur glance at him. Ludwig couldn't look at him. Ludwig kept his gaze on his still-shaking hands, ignoring Arthur's burning eyes. What must Arthur think of him? Alfred was dead because Ludwig didn't notice the person he thought he loved.

"Well we can't let this go on!" Mei said. Ludwig could the anger emanating off of her in waves. She imagined Gilbert must feel exactly the same that Mei did but Gilbert wasn't saying anything because of Ludwig being in the same room.

"No one wants to let this go on, Mei. Just calm down, ok?" Elizabetha said firmly, sensing Ludwig's obvious discomfort.

Mei glared at her. "Don't tell me to calm down! You all are taking this too lightly!" she said. She glared in Gilbert's direction making Ludwig's hands tremble more though now with anger.

Gilbert firmly took Ludwig's hands. "Don't." Gilbert whispered quietly to Ludwig. Ludwig looked up at his older bruder. Gilbert grinned his usual cocky grin. A hand reached up and gently touched a cut on Ludwig's face.

"That hurt?" Gilbert asked. Ludwig shook his head. Gilbert chuckled, "Liar."

"Gilbert?" a feminine voice said. Gilbert turned his head sharply.

"Ja?" Gilbert asked. His scarlet eyes met the probing eyes of the others in the room.

"Do you or Ludwig have a say?" Elizabetha asked.

Gilbert looked back at Ludwig asking him with his eyes. Ludwig quietly shook his head.

Gilbert looked back to Elizabetha. "Nein. Do whatever you want." he said quietly. He gave Ludwig's hand an indiscrete squeeze.

"See! You all need to get serious or he's only going to hurt more people!" Mei said sharply.

"Hey." Gilbert said. His voice foreigning calmness but anyone could hear the anger and protectiveness lacing his voice, "Just because some of us aren't saying anything doesn't mean they don't care."

Mei glared at him sharply, "Oh really? Care to explain?" she said.

"Sure since some of us are too daft to understand" he smirked, "I understand how you're feeling protective over your siblings but open your eyes! Kiku went through hell but he wasn't in there nearly as long as Ludwig! If your best friend had done the things that Italy did to Ludwig and Kiku, then you'd be quiet too so just shut up and stop being a brat!" Gilbert said. He gently squeezed Ludwig's hands even though they weren't shaking.

"This is the exact same attitude that made you lose your country! Why are you even here anyway? Everyone would be much happier if you just died like you should have!" Mei snapped. "That way you can't destroy Ludwig like you destroyed yourself!"

Ludwig could feel Gilbert stiffen up beside him his scarlet eyes filled with an anger that he had seen many times in their history together. Not one time had that look done anything good for Gilbert's opponent.

"Hey!" Elizabetha said sharply. "Enough! We don't have time to fight amongst ourselves! Now more then ever we need to stay together and forget past instances!"

"Yes. We need to stay together, aru!" Yao said.

"I think we should just blow Italy to bits, da?" Ivan said sweetly.

Ludwig stiffened. Gilbert gently squeezed his hand.

"No." Ludwig whispered. Gilbert gently rubbed his hand.

"Ludwig," Gilbert said gently, "He's gone. You can't save him; we can only protect ourselves now."

Ludwig shook his head. He couldn't accept the fact that Italy was gone.

"No! I can save him! We made a deal; if he gets in a pinch then I'd come save him!" Ludwig said quietly.

"Ludwig, that happened a long time ago. Italy's changed too much. You need to let him go." Gilbert said.

"His name is Feliciano!" Ludwig shouted. Everyone looked at him, startled by his sudden outburst, "You all keep calling him Italy like he's not a human with feelings. Why are you all so eager to hurt him like he's some animal that needs to be hunted! He's a human just like us!"

"He is an animal! Humans don't lock each other in rooms and beat them!" Mei shouted.

"He killed Alfred and bombed Francis!" Arthur cried out.

"He shoved Spain into a pool! That's more then enough evidence against him!" Roderick said.

"Ludwig," Elizabetha's gentle voice said. "I know your close to him and most of us in here was, though none of us were as close as you two were." she said. "I understand you don't want to hurt him but everyone else in here has faced reality. I'm sorry Ludwig but your Feliciano is gone. Unless you want someone else to get hurt, we have to stop Feliciano."

"You don't have to kill him though!" Ludwig pleaded desperately.

"No one wants to do it, Ludwig." Yao said.

"But we can't stop him any other way." Elizabetha said gently.

Ludwig's hands started trembling furiously. Gilbert held them firmly.

"Calm down, West." he whispered quietly as to not draw attention to Ludwig's hands.

"N-no!" Ludwig choked out. A lump formed in his throat making it painful to speak. "Not him! Please not him!"

Elizabetha, she walked over to Ludwig and knelt down in front of him as if he was a little child. She gently tilted Ludwig's head to look at her.

"Ludwig, we all understand what you're feeling; you're not alone." she said gently.

Ludwig stayed silent. He refused to show any more weakness to them; he had already exposed too much.

"It'll be easier if you face the facts; Feliciano's gone and we can't stop him from hurting anyone else unless we stop him." Elizabetha said.

Ludwig stared right through her. His brain slowly wrapped itself around the truth even though his heart refused to listen.

"Have we reached a conclusion?" Roderick asked solemnly.

Everyone else nodded.

Gilbert stood up, his face neutral. "Let's go, Ludwig." he said taking Ludwig's shoulders and helping him stand on his crutches. Elizabetha's eyes met Gilberts; hers being soft and compassionate, his unreadable. They both felt bad about what was to happen to Feliciano and both worried about Ludwig.

Gilbert steered the zombie-like Ludwig to the door.

"How about we go see Kiku now?" Gilbert asked in his usual upbeat tone. Ludwig shook his head.

"Nein. I think I'll take a nap." Ludwig said in a monotone voice. Gilbert gently ruffled his hair.

"Anything you want, West." Gilbert smiled. "Anything you want."

The two brothers walked back to their room, shoulder to shoulder. Ludwig's shoulders were slumped low. Gilbert kept his arm wrapped around Ludwig's shoulders and occasionally ruffled his hair the way he used to. He wanted to keep reminding Ludwig that things would always get better and he'd still have happy memories to help him through tough times.

Nothing could brighten the Germans mood. Not when he had allowed those people-those monsters- to think they could hurt his Feliciano. He knew Feliciano was gone but he couldn't accept it. He wanted to refuse it but the rational part of himself kept telling him that he was just thinking what he wanted to think.

Ludwig was so confused. His heart was beginning to throb as the jumbled up thoughts spun around in his head. Gilbert must have known this because he would ruffle his hair or gently squeeze his shoulder. It would take Ludwig's eyes off the pain, if only for a second.

"Gilbert!" Elizabetha's voice called from behind. Gilbert stopped. Removing his arm from around Ludwig, Gilbert turned around.

"Ja?" Gilbert said. "What is it Liz?"

Elizabetha stopped, her eyes wide, "Antonio just called! He said Romano hasn't come to visit him in a while. When Antonio got a nurse to go check his house, the nurse said that no one had been home in a while. They think Feliciano got him!"

"Vas?" Gilbert scoffed. "That can't be right! Feliciano would never hurt Romano!"

"But we also said he wouldn't hurt Ludwig or Kiku!" Elizabetha exclaimed.

"Well, there must be an explanation for this!" Gilbert said.

"Well, Spain's getting really worried so he's meeting us here so we can discuss what to do about Romano. He just got cleared from the hospital the other day! We're then all going to head up to Austria if all goes well." Elizabetha said.

Gilbert growled. "Dumb Four Eyes."

"Gil!" Elizabetha snapped. Gilbert looked at her, his scarlet eyes holding an edge to them. "This is serious! Something really bad could be happening to Romano and all you care about is that we're going to Austria?"

"Just can it, Liz! What point is there in leaving if we have to find Romano? We can't do much in Austria" Gilbert snapped.

"We can do plenty in Austria! It's at least a safe place to go!" Elizabetha snapped.

Gilbert sighed, "I have gotten so tired of you always sticking up for Austria and complimenting Austria. Austria this, Austria that!" Gilbert mocked.

"Come on, Gilbert! That's not fair and you know it!" Elizabetha said.

"No! You're not being fair so just go away! I don't need anyone except Ludwig. Its way too awesome to be alone!" Gilbert said coldly. He turned around, putting an arm around Ludwig. "Let's go, Ludwig."

The two started walking down the hallway. "Gilbert!" Elizabetha exclaimed.

Gilbert ignored her, just grinning and ruffling at Ludwig's hair. Ludwig knew his brother well enough that he was just trying to hide his pain.

"Gilbert, just talk to me, you big jerk!" Elizabetha called after him. She again got no response from Gilbert. She sighed, "Fine then! Screw you!"

Elizabetha stalked down the hallway, opposite the direction of Gilbert and Ludwig.

"Girls are jerks, aren't they?" Gilbert said smirking. "Is that why you like dudes better?"

This earned Gilbert a smile from Ludwig. Gilbert chuckled lightly and ruffled his hair.

"Kesesese! Did you like that one?" Gilbert asked.

"Ja." Ludwig smiled softly.

"You know what? I'm better off alone anyway. There's no one awesome enough to be worthy enough to be called my girlfriend!" Gilbert smiled.

"Gil?" Ludwig asked.

"Ja, Luddy?" Gilbert asked smirking.

"Do you really want to be alone?" Ludwig asked gently.

Gilbert was surprised by the question. "Ja. Of course!" Gilbert insisted grinning again.

Ludwig looked at him skeptically. Gilbert smile faded eventually.

"Ok, so maybe I don't. But there's no one out there who can put up with me besides you and no offense, I'm not into the whole incest thing." Gilbert said.

"You never gave them a chance. Granted, I think you were crazy to date Ivan but Elizabetha can be the person for you." Ludwig said. His brother had been alone to far too long. He wanted Gilbert to feel how wonderful it was to be loved.

"But West," Gilbert started.

"Nein. Don't start with that 'I'm awesome' crap. You need to give her a chance!" Ludwig said. Gilbert was silent for once in his life. "Just let her into your heart. People aren't perfect but it's their faults that make them special."

Gilbert sighed and ran a pale hand through white hair. "I guess you might be right." he sighed. "I'm so confused though!"

"That's what love is about!" Ludwig said.

Gilbert chuckled, "I didn't know you knew so much about love, West!" he teased him. He unlocked the hotel room's door. Ludwig went in first and Gilbert locked the door behind him.

"I don't." Ludwig said sadly. He sighed and sat down on the bed. Gilbert plopped down beside him.

"Hey. Cheer up, West!" Gilbert exclaimed.

"How? Nothings right anymore!" Ludwig said desperately.

"Well just look at the bright side!" Gilbert said.

"What bright side?" Ludwig snapped.

"Uh...?" Gilbert said.

Ludwig sighed, "Just relax. I'm going to bed."

Gilbert helped Ludwig get into bed and under his covers. Ludwig closed his eyes. Gilbert brushed his hair with a gentle smile. He stayed at the foot of Ludwig's bed like a faithful watch dog.

Ludwig smiled, thankful that he at least had Gilbert. He smiled and let himself drift into sleep.

_Japans POV  
><em>

Deep brown eyes slowly opened to drink in the change of scenery.

Kiku made a small noise of confusion. Where was he? He had no idea. Nothing looked even slightly familiar. His heart beat accelerated painfully in his chest. His body was weary and sore almost everywhere. He feared that he had been kidnapped to some place again. He did not see Ludwig though. What if his friend had been killed? The very thought send his heart into over drive.

Almost on cue, footsteps neared the door. Kiku stiffened, fear racing through his veins like electricity. Each breath hurt his chest but he couldn't get himself to calm down.

The footsteps came into the room and neared where Kiku was. When he saw Mei come into the room he immediately breathed in relief, wheezing from the ache in his chest.

"Kiku, are you ok?" Mei asked in a motherly tone. She was by Kikus side in a flash. She gently brushed Kiku's forehead with her hand. Her touch sent more electric pulses through his body causing him to blush.

"I-I'm fine." Kiku said.

"Do you have a fever?" Mei asked. Kiku shook his head.

"I feel fine." He said.

"You don't look fine." Mei said. Kiku blushed again.

"Ok, maybe I am a little sore." Kiku said. He leaned his head into her touch. He hand not felt gentle touch in what felt like forever. While he didn't like touch, his body craved for that gentle touch to wash away all the pain and confusion.

Mei smiled sadly, "I'm so sorry that happened to you." She said. "But do not worry, Feliciano will pay for what he did to you."

Kiku frowned. "W-what?" he whispered.

"Do not worry. He will not be around much longer to hurt you or anyone else." Mei said smiling almost cockily.

"N-no! Is violence the answer? We can solve this without the need for blood shed!" Kiku said quickly. He didn't want Feliciano to get hurt or die. He still considered the Italian to be his friend and he didn't want him getting hurt.

"Kiku, he killed Alfred and bombed Paris!" Mei exclaimed. Kiku's froze in disbelief and shock.

"W-what? No! He couldn't have! He wouldn't do that!" Kiku said closing his eyes tightly. This all had to be some bad nightmare. Feliciano would never do anything like that. He willed himself to wake up but nothing happened.

"I'm sorry, Kiku, but you need to let him go. He needs to be stopped." Mei said gently brushing his cheek. Kiku winced in pain. His breathing was hurting his chest. Mei kissed his forehead.

"Just calm down. Everything will be ok in the end. At least you and Ludwig got out ok." Mei said gently.

"Ludwig got out?" Kiku asked, his spirits rising just slightly. Mei smiled and nodded.

"Yes, he's alive and he's doing well. You should both heal quickly since Feliciano didn't hurt your country in any way." Mei said. Kiku sighed in relief. His breathing calmed causing the pain in his chest to decrease.

"Good. I'm glad." He said. Mei smiled and kissed his head.

"Get some more rest. We'll be leaving soon." Mei smiled. Kiku, still tired despite his rest obeyed her. He closed his eyes; silently hoping good dreams will await him to give him a break from harsh reality. Mei stayed beside him, gently stroking his cheek and humming a lullaby.

Kiku was asleep in minutes.

**  
>AN:** Writing this makes me depressed but country music makes it all better. I know these last few chapters have been boring but if you get what I'm trying to hide in these chapters for you, it'll come back to play in future chapters. Please review! I love you all! LOL. 3


	17. Chapter 17

**Lost. Chapter 17**

**A/N**: Wow! This is going faster than I thought. Chapters seem empty without an authors note. Sorry if last chapters note sounded mean. I didn't mean for it to sound that way. You guys know I love you! *huggles*

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below.

_Drop the ball, watch it fall far below  
>Suck you in, hold your breath<br>The undertow creeps in slow  
>Everyone owns a gun deep inside<br>It's just a matter of how much you let it slide  
><em>

_Drop the ball, watch it fall far below  
>Suck you in, hold your breath<br>The undertow creeps in slow  
>Everyone owns a gun deep inside<br>It's just a matter of how much you let it slide  
><em>

_Help me help you they wont be there  
>Help me help you they won't see<br>_

_It hurts when you need me  
>And I can't break your fall<br>It hurts when you can't see  
>And it hurts<br>_

_Drop the switch, scratch the itch, watch it grow  
>Inch by inch, the cutting board, watch it swing to and frau<br>Everyone carries one deep inside  
>It's just a matter of how much you let it slide<br>_

_Wash it off, take the loss, let it go  
>Take it in, drink it up, we can just take it slow<br>Everyone carries one deep inside  
>It's just a matter of how much you let it slide<br>_

_Help me help you they wont be there  
>Help me help you they won't see<br>_

_It hurts when you need me  
>And I can't break your fall<br>It hurts when you can't see  
>And it hurts<br>_

_It hurts when you need me  
>And I can't break your fall<br>It hurts when you can't see  
>And it hurts<br>_

_And it hurts when you're lonely  
>And I'm standing right beside you there<br>And it hurt when you told me  
>That you told me that you tried this on your own<br>_

_Hope you never hurt  
>Hope you never cry<br>Hope you never lose your way tonight  
>Hope you never crumble<br>Hope you never fall  
>Hope you never throw away the<br>_

_Drop the ball, watch it fall far below  
>Suck you in, hold your breath, watch it swing<br>_

_It hurts when you need me  
>And I can't break your fall<br>It hurts when you can't see  
>And it hurts<br>_

_It hurts when you need me  
>And I can't break your fall<br>It hurts when you can't see  
>And it hurts<br>_

_And it hurts  
>And it hurts<br>And it hurts  
>And it hurts<br>And it hurts  
>And it hurts<em>

Lyrics to Hurt by Thousand Foot Crutch

_England's POV_

When a person is murdered their loved ones will want revenge. That much can definitely be said for Arthur even though the person who murdered Alfred was one of his own kind. At the hospital, the Brit had been positive about wanting to avenge Alfred's death. After Francis had forced him to go back to the hotel, Arthur was faced with the slightest hesitation.

Seeing Ludwig so small and injured and yet still in love with Feliciano made guilt prick Arthur's heart. How could he think of killing Feliciano when he had seen how severely his hands had shook and the look of horror in his eyes despite his attempts to hide it?

He felt like a monster. Ludwig only let a few people into his inner circle in his life. He knew of only three; Kiku, Gilbert and Feliciano. How could he think of hurting the person that was arguably the most important person to Ludwig? If they killed Feliciano like they were planning how would that affect Ludwig and Kiku, who also let only a few people in.

Arthur sighed. He watched as Gilbert led Ludwig out of the room after the heated argument. He was going to follow when Elizabetha got up before him. Arthur decided that he would wait until she came back.

He waited patiently, blocking out the others discussion of how they wanted to kill or at least hurt Feliciano. Most had decided he was too far gone to save. Those few who didn't want to hurt Feliciano were slowly being converted to wanting to hurt him. The only few that stood as strong as bricks were Ludwig and most likely Kiku.

When Elizabetha came back, her emerald eyes were glassy as if she was trying not to cry. She sought out Roderick and whispered something too him that Arthur couldn't hear. Arthur took his chance to leave not bothering to see what Roderick's reaction was. .

He let his feet carry himself to the German brother's room. He hardly noticed anything else in the hallway, which in the past Alfred would have teased him for since he was probably thinking about his fairy friends. He knocked on the door quietly. He hoped it would be hearable. He was starting to doubt that anyone heard his knock. He was going to knock again when Gilbert opened the door, scarlet eyes hard and mouth set in a firm line. His features softened seeing Arthur which made the Brit angry. He didn't want others sympathy because of what happened to Alfred and Francis, especially the ex-country.

"Hey Arty." Gilbert said trying to sound normal but it was plain from his tone of voice that even he, the great and 'awesome' Prussia couldn't. Something must have happened that Arthur missed for the usually cocky Prussian to have trouble smiling.

"Um...hey Gilbert." Arthur murmured timidly. He didn't know how to start off. "I...is Ludwig in your room?"

Gilbert glanced in although he knew his bruder was inside, "Ja, he's in but he's asleep. Why?"

Arthur heard the edge in his voice. He tried not to take it personally. Of course Gilbert would be edgy around him. He didn't know what Arthur wanted to see Ludwig for. For all he knew, Arthur could be planning yell at Ludwig and blame him for Alfred's death and Francis' injury.

"C...can I talk to him? It's really important." Arthur asked. Gilbert shifted his weight, leaning against the door. His eyes quickly scanned Arthur's body. He took in the British man's body posture and decided he wouldn't do anything bad. If anything, what he would say could help Ludwig immensely. Deciding the good over ruled the bad, Gilbert decided to let him in.

Arthur grew nervous under Gilberts gaze, even though it was Gilbert who was looking at him and not Russia. He looked away nervously.

Gilbert widened the door and stepped aside. "Ja, you can see him real quick." Gilbert said. Soundlessly, Arthur came in. He quickly found Ludwig lying on the bed, sleeping soundly. He sure did fall asleep quickly.

Arthur's confident boosted a little seeing the German asleep and so vulnerable on the bed. It was a sad sight, the bandaged and thin Ludwig, but it further convinced Arthur that what he would say would help him. He approached the bed cautiously, still unsure on how to go about this. He could either make or break Ludwig depending on how he said it.

He could feel Gilberts eyes boring into his back, watching his every step. He pushed his thoughts back and set to the task at hand.

Arthur's pale hand gently shook Ludwig's shoulders. He was almost afraid to touch him too much in fear that he'd hurt him. Ludwig's tired opaque blue eyes crack open. He looked to the sides but then finally rested and focused on Arthur in front of him.

"Ludwig," Arthur said quietly, "I'd like to talk to you."

Ludwig sat up with some effort. Arthur could tell his wounds were bothering him yet healing. Ludwig looked at Arthur and noticed that he was wearing Alfred's bomber jacket. He couldn't hold back the wince seeing how ripped and stained the precious jacket was. Nether the less, Arthur wore it anyway even though it pained him to see how beat up the jacket was.

"I'm sorry." Ludwig whispered. He looked away Arthur, not able to bear the sight of the man whose loved ones were hurt because of him. Arthur's scowled slightly, though his eyes remained gentle, almost as insurance. He was certain now that Ludwig needed to hear what he had to say.

"I didn't come here for an apology, you git, even though I appreciate it," Arthur said. He quickly added, "Not that I need sympathy."

Ludwig couldn't help but smile. Arthur realized how alike they were. Both of them had lost a very important person to them and neither wanted sympathy. Neither could help with their fragile positions. They didn't like sympathy and always tried to make themselves seem stronger but that was just to hide their fragility. Now that both were stripped of the people that helped to make them seem strong, they were left with just a shell of their former 'strength'. Ludwig might be in more pain than Arthur, not because of the physical pain, but because he would have to kill or help the others kill Feliciano and he wouldn't gain the support of another person like Arthur had with Francis.

"I," Arthur paused, unsure of how to continue. He hadn't planned too far ahead of what he was going to say and he was acutely aware of how much each word would count, "I wanted to...to tell you that I don't blame you."

Ludwig was silent. He was looking at the Brit with a mix of confusion, joy and sadness. He just blinked, waiting for Arthur to explain.

Arthur coughed nervously, "Well, what I mean is that I don't blame you for," he paused feeling a lump growing in his throat, "for Alfred or Francis. You suffered enough from Feliciano."

Ludwig cringed at the mention of the Italy but was grateful that Arthur called Feliciano by his human name instead of a country. It reminded him of how some still might consider Feliciano one of them still even though he knew Arthur probably wasn't one of them. It was clear by the look in Ludwig's eyes that he could see the Italians cruel smirk or his death at Ludwig's hands.

Arthur sat down on the bed beside him. "And I don't blame you for not wanting to harm Feliciano!" he said. His confidence was growing in confidence like how a snowball gains size as it rolls down a hill.

Ludwig swallowed, chapped lips slowly forming words, "He's a monster. He needs to be stopped or someone else will get hurt." he whispered in a monotone voice.

"Yes," Arthur said sympathetically, "but I know you love him. If I was in your position and Feliciano was Alfred, I wouldn't want to hurt Alfred." Arthur said firmly. He was determined to help the German. Not for Ludwig but so then he wouldn't feel guilty when Feliciano is killed. He wanted to be the one to slowly make him bleed out and make him cry in pain for all the pain he caused Alfred and Francis.

"I don't want to loose him," Ludwig said. "He can still come back; he's not gone just left! I don't want to give up on him!"

"Ludwig," Arthur said gently. He knew how stubborn the German was.

"I know!" Ludwig said exasperated. "He's gone. I have to face the facts like I always told him to do."

Arthur gently touched his shoulder. "Ludwig, I understand that you must feel guilt but we all need to get over our guilt before we can take the next steps." Arthur said. He felt truth in his own words and he hoped Ludwig would too. They both needed to exile all guilt they felt over the fate of their loved ones. He felt a lump rise in his own throat. He had blamed himself on Alfred's death when the real person to be blamed was Feliciano. In Ludwig's case, Ludwig blamed himself for Feliciano's murderous nature when it was also Feliciano's fault.

"But those next steps will kill him!" Ludwig suddenly shouted furiously. His hands started to tremble again. Just as he had seen Gilbert do, he enclosed his hands around Ludwig's.

"Ludwig," he said gently. "Do you want Feliciano to kill anyone else? What if Gilbert got hurt?"

Ludwig winced. "I don't want that." he whispered, "Please, don't even say that."

"I know you don't. That's why you have to choose; Feliciano or everyone else like Gilbert and Kiku." Arthur said gently messaging Ludwig's hand gently with his thumb. He knew he was being cruel in making him choose but he needed to get the point across.

"I don't want to choose! This isn't right!" Ludwig exclaimed.

"I know it isn't but we can't stop him so we're forced to prioritize." Arthur said gently. Ludwig's breathing quickened trying to control his emotions. Arthur stood up quietly deciding to let Ludwig sort out his emotions.

"I'll talk to you later." Arthur said turning away.

"Arthur?" Ludwig spoke up. Arthur paused and looked back at the German. "Thank you"

Arthur smiled gently. "Your welcome, lad, your welcome."

There was a quick almost frantic knock on the door. Gilbert growled from the kitchen area and went to answer the door.

"Pack up! We're leaving now, aru!" Yao exclaimed from the doorway.

"Vas? Why?" Gilbert asked furrowing his eyebrows.

"Because we received a note from Romano, aru! He sent us the address to Feliciano's new hideout!" Yao said.

_Romano's POV_

A few days had passed since arriving at the building. Romano had avoided Feliciano ever since he found out Alfred was killed and France had been bombed. The Feliciano he knew would never harm others the way he had. He had completely changed and Romano feared he had changed too much to go back to the way he was.

Obviously things would never be the same. Alfred was _dead_. The others would hold too much hostility towards the Italian to ever let things go back to normal. It was too late to turn back now.

The others would want revenge for all the pain Feliciano caused but what would they do? Romano feared for Feliciano's punishment. No one ever had power for long. Eventually he would have to come down and as the saying goes, 'the bigger they are, the harder they fall.'

Romano hoped Feliciano wouldn't notice he was avoiding him. He still needed to gain his trust in order to try to convince him out of his reign of power. The younger Italian probably did notice. He wasn't as dumb and oblivious as he had made himself out to be making him a dangerous enemy.

Romano felt as though he didn't know his brother anymore. Everything about him had changed. His eyes held a darker look to them, his mouth now in a constant frown or straight line, and his laugh deeper. He no longer smiled his classic close-eyed smile. If he ever smiled, his mouth curved slightly around the edges. He only laughed if it was bad news on the other countries.

Things weren't looking too brightly for the other countries. Their leaders were all arguing about how they should deal with the situation and no one seemed to be taking charge. Somehow, Feliciano found this funny and would laugh like it was the funniest joke he ever heard.

Romano, more than ever, missed his fratello. Even though he saw him every day he felt as though he was living with a stranger. His Feliciano was gone, replaced by this heartless, soulless creature. He lived in constant fear that Feliciano would deem him a traitor or a fake and would finally kill him. Visions of his bloody corpse by a smiling Feliciano haunted his dreams. He didn't want to die. He couldn't stand the thought of not being able to eat another table or sitting under a tree while Antonio picked tomatoes near him. He wanted things to go back to the way things were.

Like a cornered animal, Romano didn't know what to do. He couldn't run or Feliciano would certainly hurt or kill him. He couldn't fight for he knew he could never hurt his brother. He could only try to pretend like he was loyal to Feliciano and that he was just as hungry for power as he was.

Of course Romano wasn't. He was content with being South Italy. He was who he was and he gas grown to accept it, though he didn't like it.

In truth, he was never called Italy. He was just Romano. No one but Antonio, who couldn't remember him, and Feliciano, who wasn't really Feliciano anymore, liked him. Everyone disliked him for being a rude, loud, foul mouthed want to be country. Now that both of the people who cared about him the most were gone in a sense, Romano truly felt alone now. If he were to die here, who would grieve for him? 

He was able to avoid Feliciano for a few days after the bombing with  
>ease but soon he began to feel something he had felt many times as a<br>kid.

Until he went to Antonio, he had been moved from place to place because he wouldn't do his chores. Antonio loved him anyway despite this and his temper. Besides Antonio, he had never been wanted by anyone. Everyone had wanted to trade him or sell him, even Antonio but that was in the past. Romano had simply accepted that he was sour and that people didn't like him. Now he wished he would have been at least a little nicer so at least someone would be sad at his death.

He had often felt a burning desire to be loved or at least wanted, though he wouldn't tell anyone. Whenever Antonio complimented or cooed over Feliciano, Romano would feel jealousy knawl at his stomach. He had learned to stay detached so that when his boss would give him up he wouldn't be disappointed. That was how he developed his perpetual frown and bad temper.

It worked in driving off others around him accept Antonio and Feliciano. Somehow they still loved him and cared about him and Romano loved them back, though he hardly ever said so.

So when Antonio and Feliciano both changed, Romano felt that familiar hollowness and jealousness. Hollowness that he was alone again; jealousy that it wasn't him who had lost his memory.

The loneliness became too unbearable for him that he gave up on avoiding Feliciano. Besides that, it was depleting his original purpose for coming; trying to stop Feliciano.

Summoning whatever confidence he had, Romano made his way to Feliciano's room, hoping he hadn't noticed that Romano was avoiding him or thought that he was just leaving him alone so Feliciano could work on his vast mountain of paperwork.

Finally reaching the solid mahogany door to Feliciano's office, Romano knocked on the door, inwardly cursing at how timid he sounded.

"Come in." Feliciano said. His voice was void of emotion; something Romano wasn't used to hearing from his fratello usual jovial, almost bell like voice.

Romano opened the door and walked in, forcing his shoulders to relax. He tried to give out a comfortable aura but even Romano could sense how uncomfortable it was and how nervous he felt.

"Lovino?" Feliciano said, happy and yet half amused too see him. "It's good to see you."

Romano tried to act like he normally did so he just frowned, crossed his arms over his chest and looked away, "Yeah yeah yeah." he muttered.

Feliciano smiled, intrigued by his fratello's actions, "I had been beginning to think you were hiding from me."

"Pfft! That's dumb!" Romano scoffed.

Feliciano shrugged. "I don't know; your not denying it." he said. His once warm chocolate eyes bore into Romano making him feel over exposed and vulnerable. His instincts screamed at him to run the other way but he kept his feet firmly planted in the ground.

"You're just as stupid as ever, Feli." Romano said. If the statement had come from anyone else, they would have to be carried out of Feliciano's office in a coffin. However since it was Romano speaking and it was how Romano usually talked, Feliciano allowed it.

Instead, Feliciano just laughed, "And you're just as bad as a liar." he said. He smiled at Romano, though the friendly demeanor was fake, "If I think that you're avoiding me again, you'll be finding yourself with a few new scars at least."

Romano gulped and nodded stiffly.

Feliciano smiled again as if he hadn't just threatened Romano, "So why'd you come here?" he asked.

"Uh..." Romano said scrambling to gather whatever wits he had, "I came to you because I wanted to help you but so far I haven't done anything and I don't even know our allies."

Feliciano smirked, "All in good time, fratello. I have a task for you shortly. Call it a test if you will. Actually, more like a pre-test." Feliciano explained. He leaned forward on the desk, propping his head on his hands.

"A pre-test?" Romano echoed, "Of what?"

"We'll be seeing our little friends soon. Then is when you will finally meet our allies." Feliciano said smirking in a way that made Romano feel uncomfortable. It was as if all of Feliciano's dark, twisted thoughts had tainted Feliciano's facial expression as well.

"What are we planning to do?" Romano asked, trying to sound excited or at least happy.

"I want to see how well you fight. You will lead our allies to go fight our friends. Trust me; we have enough that we should be strong." Feliciano smirks.

Romano tries to mimic the smirk, "Hopefully it is soon; I am too excited to wait much longer."

Feliciano chuckled, a dark sinister sound, "Yes. Very soon, fratello. Our time of revenge is coming soon."

Saving Romano from a reply, a man walked behind Romano knocked on the open door.

"Mr. Vargas, I have very important news." the man said. What was his name again? Cosco? Disco?

"Yes, what is it?" Feliciano asked, his smirk taking on a curious edge. The man glanced at Romano causing his heart to beat erratically. He smoothed his face so neither Felixiano nor the man would suspect anything.

The man quickly crossed the floor and whispered in Feliciano's ear. Feliciano's smile disappeared like a boat being dragged into the watery depths of an ocean. Feliciano whispered something in the mans ear.

At this point, Romano's mind is spinning so fast that he can barely think. He hardly noticed the man shut and lock the door and Feliciano get up from his chair and stroll to the front of the desk.

"So fratello?" Feliciano asked in a voice often used on a parent to a disobedient child, "Is this true?"

"I-Is w-w-what t-true!" Romano mentally curses himself for stammering like a coward.

Feliciano kept calm. "I think you know what I mean." he said. Romano stayed silent. Feliciano looked at him. The more he stared at Romano, the edgier the older brother got. He knew he know and Feliciano knew Romano knew he knew.

Before Romano would even grasp what was happening, Feliciano had stalked up to Romano in lightening speed and shoved him roughly into a corner. He grabbed a fist full of Romano's shirt, using his arm to pin Romano to the wall. His free hand formed a fist and smashed itself into Romano's face. Romano groaned and sagged into Feliciano's arm.

Feliciano looked in disgust and threw him to the ground. Blood leaked from a cut on Romano's cheek.

"How dare you,?" Feliciano snapped, "How could you lie to me and give me away like that?"

"I-I didn't." Romano said desperately. Feliciano sent his foot flying into Romano's stomach. Romano doubled over with a sharp cry. Feliciano crouched and grabbed a fistful of his brothers auburn hair and thrust his head against the wall.

"You worthless piece of crap! If you lie to me one more time I'll kill you!" Feliciano spat. Romano only had the energy to groan. "I will be generous and give you a second chance but do not blow it!"

Feliciano let go if Romano and stood up. He looked down at his impudent brother in disgust. He snorted.

"Get your filth out of my office now! I have worked to do!" Feliciano snapped. Romano struggled to his feet, using the wall as support. He waited a few seconds until his legs were strong enough to hold his weight and went to the door as quick as he could. He could feel Feliciano's eyes following him the entire time. The guard opened it for him and he quickly fled to his own room.

Once in his room, he shut the door quietly in fear of upsetting Feliciano if it was too loud and flung himself down on the bed. He struggled to control his breathing. The events replayed in his brain, images of Feliciano's cruel eyes and barbaric smirk replayed in his head as the sound of his sadistic laugh reverberated in his head.

He began to doubt he could help his brother. Feliciano had never shown hostility towards Romano and he knew Romano had a special place in his heart for Feliciano even though Romano would never say so.

If Feliciano could hurt Romano as he did, what else could he do? He had already hurt Antonio (though Feliciano said he didn't, Romano didn't believe him), Kiku and Ludwig, killed Alfred and bombed France. If his goal was to kill all the country like he perceived then he did have the means to do it.

Fear took over nearly all of Romano's emotions. Not fear for himself but for Feliciano. He was Feliciano's only chance at changing his mind. He had to save Feliciano from himself in order to make things right but Feliciano was making it hard.

But if situations were reversed, Feliciano wouldn't have given up on Romano so Romano would do the same. Romano would fight until he was killed, may it be by Feliciano's hands or someone else, in order to save Feliciano.

He just prayed that Feliciano hadn't changed too much that he couldn't be saved.

**A/N:** Review please! This chapter was going to be MUCH longer but I divided it in half. I know the last few chapters have been boring so the action starts the next chapter. I was curious bout something that I was hoping you guys could answer for me. I can't tell you my age (sorry.) but based on how I write the story, how old do you think I am? Thankies! Review please! 


	18. Chapter 18

**Lost. Chapter 18**

**A/N: **Ok, the event that really starts the plot is going. If you haven't figured it out, this will be about 40-50 chapters. Maybe more! I really want to finish this story and practice my writing! I'm going to try to get out more than one chapter a week! Then it'll be done quicker! Hope you enjoy this next chapter! Oh and I found a way to not get depressed when writing/reading this...LISTEN TO MICHAEL JACKSON! I finally stopped crying when I listen to his songs since I'm an emotional sap and cry over things for two years or in some cases longer. ^.^ Hehe.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below.

_Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear  
>Sealed with lies through so many tears<br>Lost from within and pursuing the end  
>I fight for the chance to be lied to again<br>_

_You will never be strong enough  
>You will never be good enough<br>You were never conceived in love  
>You will not rise above<br>_

_They'll never see, I'll never be  
>I'll struggle on and<br>On to feed this hunger  
>Burning deep inside of me<br>_

_But through my tears breaks a blinding light  
>Birthing a dawn to this endless night<br>Arms outstretched, awaiting me  
>An open embrace upon a bleeding tree<br>_

_Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
>I have lived and I died for you<br>Abide in me and I vow to you  
>I will never forsake you<br>_

_They'll never see, I'll never be  
>I'll struggle on and<br>On to feed this hunger  
>Burning deep inside of me<br>_

_They'll never see, I'll never be  
>I'll struggle on and<br>On to feed this hunger  
>Burning deep inside of me<br>_

_Rest in me and I'll comfort you  
>I have lived yet died for you<br>Abide in me and I vow to you  
>I will never forsake you<br>_

_They'll never see, I'll never be  
>I'll struggle on and<br>On to feed this hunger  
>Burning deep inside of me<em>

_Lyrics to Lies by Evanescence_

_Germany's POV  
><em>

To say Arthur's visit surprised Ludwig would be the under-statement of the century. He could hardly understand why the Brit would come to take guilt off of Ludwig's shoulders now.

Ludwig was in for a second surprise when Yao came in. Arthur left with Yao and left Gilbert with Ludwig.

"Ok Luddy! We're heading out again!" Gilbert said with a grin. Ludwig got his crutch and stood up.

"Where are we going?" Ludwig asked wanting to hear from Gilbert.

Gilbert was quickly spinning around the room with about as much organization a tornado. He was making more of a mess than he was packing but Ludwig just let him go. He would never tell anyone but he enjoyed to see his brother so energetic.

"Uh...Romano joined Feliciano to spy for us. He got the locations to Feliciano's new base so we're going there now." Gilbert said. To say that Ludwig's emotions were clashed would also be an understatement. He kept his facial expression cool and emotionless while he could feel anger, and sadness all swirling around in him in a torrent of confusion.

He knew they would have to kill Feliciano but he didn't expect it to be so soon. He had hoped for some more time to come to terms with the Italians fate.

"You do not have to go, Ludwig. We can go back to Germany; you and me." Gilbert said pausing in his work for a moment to observe Ludwig. He was surprised that Ludwig's hands weren't trembling.

"Nein. I'm fine. I-," Ludwig paused thinking. Could he stand there quietly as his allies killed Feli? Would he be able to bear the sight of Feliciano's precious blood or hear his pained screams as he drew in his last breaths? Could Ludwig let Feliciano die without letting him know how much he loved him? "-I want to be there for him." Ludwig said finally.

He didn't know why he said it. He just had to be there for Feliciano's last moments; for closure and to feel like he was there for the Italian even though he hadn't.

Gilbert nodded; his facial expression unreadable. He finished packing in silence. Ludwig didn't know what else to say. His Feliciano would be dead soon. He wouldn't do anything to help him. Did his pinky swear mean anything? Did he love the Italian as much as he said he did?

Since they didn't have anything accept for the medical things that had been bought, which took long enough to gather since Gilbert tossed everything around when he was taking care of Ludwig and their weapons, packing didn't take too long though it did cause a big mess.

"Hey West?" Gilbert asked.

"Hmmm." Ludwig said half paying attention.

"How's your leg? It should be healed soon." Gilbert said. Ludwig blinked his eyes into focus and looked down at his bandaged leg. It was still sore but not nearly as sore. His other wounds that had been infected had been healing quickly due to the medicine Gilbert put on it.

"It's better. Danke." Ludwig said though it was clear there wasn't a lot of emotion behind it. Gilbert grinned and ruffled his hair playfully.

"Lets go, dummkompf." he said affectionately. He picked up their supply and strutted to the door. He held it open with his foot for Ludwig as he crutched out. Everyone but Mei and Kiku was out already since they hadn't had anything.

"Aww!" Gilbert said grinning. "Did you guys wait for my awesomeness?"

Roderick crossed his arms over his chest. His eyes narrowed into slits. "No." he snapped. "This is serious so we don't have time to goof off!"

Gilbert made a face as if he had just eaten something sour, "You don't have to be such a prick, specs."

Roderick sighed and decided against arguing with him.

Ludwig noticed that Gilbert hasn't acknowledged or even glanced at Elizabetha.

He prodded Gilberts rib with his elbow.

"What is it, West?" Gilbert asked him with a big grin.

"Give her a chance. Go talk to her." Ludwig whispered. Gilbert groaned and looked at her. Ludwig knew that Gilbert did want to go over with her. Gilbert might be the older brother but sometimes it seemed as though Ludwig was the older brother. Gilbert could be mature about something but those things were few and far between. He still acted hyper as a child and about as mature as one as well.

"Go!" Ludwig said sharply.

"I can't just go. That would make me a totally unawesome big bruder." Gilbert scoffed. Ludwig looked around quickly. He spotted Mei and Kiku walking towards their group, holding hands.

"There's Kiku; now go talk to her!" Ludwig said. He used his arm to weakly shoved Gilbert towards Elizabetha and hurried to Kiku, finding that his legs had more energy now that he was getting more life back into him now that he wasn't thinking of Feliciano's death hanging over his head like a bolder.

"Kiku!" he called. Kiku glanced up and locked gazes with Ludwig. Since both of them were uncomfortable with too much touch, they didn't hug. They just looked at the other, taking in each others injuries.

"You look much better, Ludwig-san." Kiku said politely. Ludwig couldn't help but allow a small smile.

"Danke, Kiku. The same goes to you." he said.

"Do you know where we're going?" Kiku questioned.

Ludwig winced slightly. All his energy was crushed at the reminder of Feliciano's planned death, "W-we're going to Feliciano's new base." he said quietly, "Romano sent the new address. Apparently, he is spying for us."

Ludwig watched Kiku's face bug Kiku was far too skilled at keeping his face void of emotion.

"They are going to kill him." Ludwig whispered. He was aware of Mei standing there beside Kiku and he knew she strongly supported Feliciano's death but he didn't care. Kiku's eyes flashed with surprise and hurt but he quickly masked himself. He was all too familiar with having to mask emotions.

"Kill Ita-chan?" Kiku asked, using Italy's pet name. Ludwig only nodded.

"Kiku," Mei spoke gently. "You should understand why he must be killed. He killed Alfred, he caused Spain to loose his memory, he bombed France and you've both have endured his 'care'." Mei said.

Her gentle tone made Ludwig angry. Why should she be kinder to Ludwig and Kiku when she had just told Prussia it would be better if he had died with his country? Didn't she already realize that she had insulted Ludwig by telling everyone that it would have been better if Gilbert was dead?

Kiku closed his eyes for a few moments before opening them again, "Mei, I am touched by your concern but Feliciano has been my friend for a long time. I cannot simply toss our friendship out the window any more than I can agree to him being killed." Kiku said in a voice barely over a whisper.

"What do you expect us to do?" Mei asked. "You might not be able to forget your friendship but he did! We cannot just let him kill another country! Have you seen what Arthur's become? "

"Mei, I believe you have already stuck your nose into too many unwanted places." Ludwig said sharply. Mei glared at him.

"I am simply caring for those around me. I know you've been through a lot, Ludwig, but my concern is to those that are innocent of atrocities." Mei said. Ludwig narrowed his eyes at her dangerously. Kiku put a hand on her shoulder in a warning. He understood that she was just upset about her brothers treatment but she was taking it almost to an extreme.

"Please sister, stop this." Kiku said quietly.

Mei sighed. "Fine fine! I don't want to be the bad guy!"

"You're not the bad guy. We know you have good intentions." Ludwig said though his voice was not comforting in the least. "But if you _ever_ tell my bruder that it would have been better if he had died, I swear to Gott that you will wish you had never come with us."

Mei blinked surprised at the sudden change in the German. She nodded none-the-less.

Ludwig glanced back at Gilbert who had appeared to have made up with Elizabetha then looked back at the small Japanese man.

"Bye Kiku." he said. Kiku allowed a small smile.

"Hai. Sayonara, Ludwig-san." Kiku said. Ludwig hurried back to Gilbert who grinned and ruffled Ludwig's blond locks.

"Hey, Luddy! How'd it go?" Gilbert asked enthusiastically.

"Gutt." Ludwig lied. Gilbert laughed gently, "Kesesese."

"Let's head out now, da?" Ivan said sweetly.

"Yeah. Lets get the show on the road!" Gilbert said grinning. He took Elizabetha's hand and wrapped an arm around Ludwig's shoulders almost in a way to show the Russian that they were his. Gilbert chuckled with a grin, "Kesesese!"

A blush blossomed on Elizabetha's cheek. Gilbert leaned over and stole a kiss on her rosy cheeks. She swatted his chest playfully.

Ludwig removed Gilberts arm around him. When Gilbert looked at him he simply said, "I'm going to walk with Kiku."

What he didn't want to say was 'I'll let you have some alone time with your girlfriend.' Gilbert would start going off about how Elizabetha wasn't his girlfriend.

Gilbert just ruffled Ludwig's hair. "Alright." he grinned. Ludwig went over to Kiku who just smiled. They walked out in silence.

"So where's this address at and how do we get there?" Roderick asked.

"Antonio is on a train over here right now, aru. He seems pretty bent on getting 'his Lovi' back." Yao said.

"I still don't understand why we don't we just blow little Italy up?" Ivan asked sweetly.

"Because if we bomb Italy, we'll hurt Romano!" Roderick said sharply.

"So, then we'll be rid of Mr. Anger Management too." Ivan sang.

"Ivan!" Elizabetha snapped. "Romano is helping us and that's not a good enough excuse to kill him!"

"It is for me." Ivan grinned. Ludwig and Kiku both stayed silent.

"Well we're not hurting him and that's final!" Gilbert said. His tone clearly said 'no buts'.

They quickly left their little town in the mountains to head to the train station Antonio told them he would be at.

_Romano's POV_

Romano lived in constant fear of confronting his friends. He couldn't disobey Feliciano in fear of getting hurt and fear that he will not be able to save Feliciano. He couldn't stand the thought of Feliciano getting hurt and he knew the other countries weren't going to let Feliciano go. Worst comes to worse, they would bomb Italy. Romano and his innocent citizens would be hurt just to get to Feliciano.

Romano couldn't allow himself to chicken out just to save his own butt when his actions could cause many innocent people to loose their lives.

He was stuck now. He was bound with his fratello in his war. It seemed as if it was them against the world but Feliciano was pretty confident about their allies. Even though Romano felt like Feliciano was his Feliciano, he knew that Feliciano was stronger and smarter than he made himself out to be so he would just have to trust him.

Sometime yesterday, Gosto had shown Romano where the weapons were and gave him a brief explanation of how to use them properly. The demonstration had scared him more than comforted him. He didn't want to fight them yet he had no doubt his real allies would come to the address.

The gun in his holster feel heavy, like it was pulling him down; down to the depths of hell. He didn't want to hurt anyone, much less kill anyone. He needed to make his fight look believable but he needed to send the others message: that he wouldn't hurt them and he was still on their side.

Romano went downstairs of the house. He had to admit, Feliciano was pretty clever. If he had thought of a base, he would have thought of some big warehouse and not this tiny house. One of the things Feliciano had taught him was to not under estimate such things.

Feliciano had told Romano of the vast underground lab under the house. Anyone who would see the house wouldn't be able to suspect anything other than two Italian brothers living together.

Romano had to admit that it was pretty clever. He hoped that when his allies came, they would see the house and turn around thinking he had misled them.

Of course, with his luck, that is not what happened. Within a few days, his allies did in fact come and even worse, Spain was there too.

They had came with the same weapons they had when they attacked the first base. They must have collected a few guns for the shot the door knob.

Gosto and Fosco quickly joined Romano, both wielding swords. Romano quickly unsheathed his own swords. His eyes met with Antonio's. His kept himself cool, not allowing himself to feel bad by the look of betrayal in Antonio's eyes.

Feliciano quickly descended the stairs. Romano didn't look up from the band of countries in front of him; waiting for Feliciano's order or a move from the others.

He caught some movement in the back; Gilbert and Mei shoving a stunned Ludwig and Kiku outside. Romano also noted Hungary, Austria, Russia, China, England and of course Spain. He didn't see France but yet again, he should have guessed he wouldn't be there.

"What are you standing there for?" Feliciano shouted. "Get them!"

Almost simultaneously Gosto and Fosco charged at the countries. Romano quickly gathered his wits and charged a few steps behind him.

Romano charged at Antonio like a bull. He needed to get his message to him. Maybe he would listen to him.

Their swords clashed together with the clank of metal striking metal. The light bouncing off their swords shined on the roof of the house like a pool of water. Romano was only able to hold in his wince, thinking of the night Spain fell into the pool.

Antonio's eyes filled with beads of tears as he battled Romano. He had forgotten his memory but he obviously hadn't forgotten how to fight.

"Why Lovi?" Antonio asked broken heartedly. "I thought you were on our side!" Perspiration was already starting to dot his forehead. His days in the hospital had caused him to get out of shape.

"Because," Romano snarled as realistically as he could. He wasn't aware of where anyone else was but he wanted to sound believable in case Feliciano was nearby. "I'm tired of everyone seeing me as the angry, cowardly Italian!"

Antonio looked at him desperately. "Oh Lovi!" he said softly. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you thought that way! Please, just stop this fighting and come back. We can make this work out!" Antonio begged.

Romano was starting to get tired of fighting. He kept a firm grip on his sword and advanced a step, swinging his sword offensively. He locked his sword with Antonio's and leaned close to him.

Antonio's body stilled and went ridged. "Roma?" he breathed. His sweet scent wreathed around Romano. He felt more at home than he had for a long. He longed for Antonio to hug him close and tell him everything would be alright.

Romano frowned but his eyes softened. He stared hard into Antonio's eyes, hoping his message would get across.

Antonio started to relax slightly seeing the change in Romano's golden eyes. Romano was about to lean back and start fighting him again when something slammed into him and drove his body into the ground.

The impact caused the breath to be driven out of the Italians body. His mind scrambled to grasp what was happening. Before he could see who was still on him and straddling him to the floor, a fury of fists rained down on him.

"No! Russia stop!" Antonio exclaimed. Footsteps hurried to Antonio.

"Let him go. Ivan won't kill him." Gilbert said pushing Antonio away.

_No! Antonio, save me, bastardo!_

The fists didn't stop. Romano feebly tried to protect himself but his arms were trapped by the Russians so all he could do was keep his eyes closed.

His face hurt so much. His head pounded painfully and his ears rang against his poor eardrums. His wounds from Feliciano reopened. He could tell his face would be a bloody mess. His nose hurt particularly, as if it had been broken.

The taste of blood filled his mouth. Romano cried out at every strike. Blood ran out of his mouth, joining other streams of blood, running down his face.

"Ivan, stop! You're going to hurt him, aru!" Yao exclaimed near by. Even though he was close, his voice sounded distant. A fog swirled around Romano's consciousness, dragging him down. He only groaned, no longing able to obtain the strength to cry out. He felt dizzy.

His body went limp, devoid of any fight he had been putting up

"Gilbert, let me go!" Spain cried. "He's hurting my Lovi!"

Romano didn't fight as the mist swirled around his consciousness and swallowed him up.

The last thing he was aware of was the agony of Russia's fists and Spain's cries.

_N. Italy's POV_

Feliciano joined in the fight shortly after Romano and his two henchmen joined in. He charged quickly at Austria.

Austria tried to hold his ground but he was nothing compared to Feliciano's superior skills. He managed to injure his arm. He didn't plan to kill him since he needed him to suffer more still. He released him hearing Antonio yelling at Ivan. Begging was more like it.

Feliciano ignored it at first. He knew Romano had been fighting the Spaniard. He was probably begging him to come back into him 'loving' arms. Judging by the nonstop begs, Romano was staying loyal to Feliciano.

Feliciano smirked, very happy with this. He knew his fratello would choose him. They were closer than anyone else. They would forever be linked in a way no one could beat or even compete with.

"No! Ivan stop! You're killing him! You're killing him!" Antonio cried hysterically. Feliciano quickly kicked Roderick into a wall so he could look at what was happening.

He would never have expected to see Ivan straddling his fratello's unconscious body. Rage filled Feliciano. A red streak obscured his vision. He was by his brother in a second. He quickly cut Ivan's chest, not enough to kill him but enough to get him off and cause a great amount of pain.

Ivan hissed in pain and looked up sharply to meet Feliciano's eyes. Feliciano could feel the blood pulsing on his ears. His finger itches to thrust his sword through the Russians heart. Even better yet, cause him a more painful death and stab his neck. He forced himself to keep his cool. He kicked Ivan's chest wound, sending him sprawling onto his back.

Feliciano bent down and picked up his fratello, not taking his eyes off his enemy.

"It is not your time to die yet. However, if you do not get out of here right now I will be forced to kill you!" Feliciano warned with a dangerous tone. They might have him out numbered but they knew Feliciano could easily have more men. They quickly ran out, taking their weapons with them. Feliciano let them go. It wouldn't be fun if they were weaponless.

"Gosto, make sure they leave. Fosco, fix the door and clean up down here." Feliciano ordered quickly Gosto and Fosco ordered a couple of the other men who had been fighting with them to help. He held Romano to him gently. He could feel blood soaking into his shirt, causing an urgency to his tone. Both men dipped their heads to him.

"Yes sir!" they said in unison.

Feliciano quickly took Romano to his room. He gently laid him all the bed.

His stomach churned at the sight of his fratello's bloody face. He didn't mind blood as long as it wasn't his loved ones blood. His brother's face, however, was covered in blood.

He couldn't see the full extend of his wounds since there was so much blood. He could only see that his nose was a wreck and both his eyes were swelled.

Feliciano went to the bathroom. He got a small bucket and filled it with water. He carried that, a cloth and a first aid kit back to the room.

He gently washed his fratello's face of blood. It was a good thing his fratello was unconscious because he would probably be in a lot of pain. It was just his face though. Feliciano could teach him to fight after he woke up. He wasn't going to let his fratello get hurt any more than this.

After his face was all clean, Feliciano could see all the cuts that littered Romano's face. Most of them were deep and without proper treatment, would probably get infected.

Feliciano rooted through the first aid kit and put alcohol on another end of the cloth and used that to clean the wounds even more. He could imagine the sting that the chemicals brought to the wounds, again making him thankful that Romano was unconscious.

Feliciano gently fingered Romano's nose. It indeed was broken. That much was clear by the angle of the cartilage. Feliciano took it firmly and put it back into place. He was satisfied that it was put back into place and reassured of it by the crack.

Feliciano got out two ice packs and snapped them to activate them. He gently put them over Romano's eyes to help with the swelling.

Once he was finished with his work, he gently bent down and placed a tender kiss on Romano's forehead, trying to find a spot where there wasn't a cut but that was near impossible. He pulled a chair beside the bed. He wanted to be there when Romano woke up. His fratello deserved it since he had proved that he was loyal.

He was proud to finally have his fratello on his side. His other allies were wonderful, no doubt but none of them loved them as Romano did. Even though it was brotherly love and Romano had a weird way of showing love, his love was truer than his allies; even his secret lover.

His allies only loved him because he helped them reach their goal. Yet again, the only reason Feliciano loved them was because they were loyal and they would help him. Romano had always loved him, even when he had portrayed himself as a wimp. He had always been beside him, no matter if he was powerful or not.

For that, Romano deserved someone to wake up to.

**A/N:** Sorry the second half is bad editing. My parents came in halfway through and told me my hamster was dying so we spend almost an hour with him until he passed and then spent a long time crying over it. Don't expect another fast update. There probably won't be any because of that and because of some stories I got to write for school. I hope that was enough action for you. Some more action is coming! I think I almost have this whole thing planned out now but some suggestions are always welcome and considered. I love to make you guys happy. Also, last chapter marked one hundred reviews on fanfiction. I read every review on fanfiction and DeviantArt so thanks guys! I love ya! Keep the reviews coming!


	19. Chapter 19

**Lost. Chapter 19**

**A/N:** Omg! Nineteen chapters! None of my stories have exceeded 14 and I have never finished a chapter story except for the book I made in fourth grade which was only 20 pages.

I also wanted to thank my dad. He doesn't know it but he helped me with this chapter. He taught me how to punch properly so I'm going to use that in this chapter. Please excuse any inaccuracy on the blocking, sword or gun. I do not hunt and my dad hasn't taught me how to shoot...yet and so far I haven't gotten into any legit fist fights except you want to count the ones with my sister or my Dad or the ones I get into with this guy at lunch but I'm the only one who throws the punches/slaps.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song.

_I'm gonna make it bend and break  
>(It sent you to me without wait)<br>Say a prayer, but let the good times roll  
>In case God doesn't show...<br>(Let the good times roll)  
>(Let the good times roll)<em>

_And I want these words to make things right  
>But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life,<br>"Who does he think he is?"  
>If that's the worst you got<br>Better put your fingers back to the keys_

_One night and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories<br>Even though they weren't so great;  
>"He tastes like you, only sweeter"!<br>One night, yeah, and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories;<br>"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"!  
>Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh<em>

_Been looking forward to the future  
>But my eyesight is going bad<br>And this crystal ball  
>It's always cloudy except for<br>(Except for)  
>When you look into the past<br>(Look into the past)  
>One night stand...<br>(One night stand, oh)_

__

_One night and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories<br>Even though they weren't so great;  
>"He tastes like you only sweeter"!<br>One night, yeah, and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories;<br>"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"!  
>Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh<em>

_They say  
>I only think in the form of crunching numbers<br>In hotel rooms collecting page-six lovers  
>Get me out of my mind<br>And get you out of those clothes  
>I'm a liner away<br>From getting you into the mood  
>Whoa<em>

_One night and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories<br>Even though they weren't so great;  
>"He tastes like you but sweeter"!<br>One night, yeah, and one more time  
>Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories;<br>"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"!_

_One night and one more time (One more night, one more time)  
>Thanks for the memories<br>Even though they weren't so great;  
>"He tastes like you but sweeter"!<br>One night, yeah, and one more time (One more night, one more time)  
>Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories; (For the memories)<br>"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"!_

Lyrics to Thanks for the Memories by Fall Out Boy

_Romano's POV_

The suffocating darkness lightened its hold on Romano.

Thin tendrils of light pierced the veil of darkness. The pressure on his head relinquished its hold. As he began to wake up, he obtained more of his senses.

A moan escaped his split lips. He tried to crack over to find out that something cold was blocking his vision.

Something lifted the obstacles off of his eyes. He cracked his eyes open. Feliciano was standing over him, an ice pack in each hand. His chocolate eyes were soft in concern, compassion and pride.

It seemed too much like the old Feli that Romano thought it was all just a nightmare. His lips cracked a smile.

"Feli." he said weakly.

Feliciano's soft expression quickly morphed into a look of anger, though Romano could tell the anger wasn't directed at him.

"You useless pezzo di merda! Do you know how much you cost me?" Feliciano shouted angrily.

Romano's smile disappeared. He blinked his eyes painfully, confused by the sudden change.

"W-what?" Romano stammered.

"You caused me to stop the fight early and I wasted perfectly good bandages and time because you wouldn't defend yourself!" Feliciano yelled.

Romano blinked. His tired brain struggled to wrap around what Feliciano was saying. "I'm s-sorry, fratello. I didn't mean to cause trouble!"

"Cause trouble? That's not even half of it! Now I'm going to have to waste time to train you! Did anyone tell you how useless you are?" Feliciano shouted.

Romano winced. "Si, I hear it a lot." he whispered.

Feliciano sighed. "I'm sorry, fratello. You tried your best and I'm chastising you. I'm doing exactly what Germany did." Feliciano said.

Romano narrowed his eyes. What was with Feliciano's sudden mood changes?

"You tried your best and you proved your loyalty to me. For that, I rewarded you with the bandages and care as well as the training. I'm grateful to have you on my side, Roma." Feliciano said quieter.

Romano hadn't heard Feliciano call him any nicknames in a long time. Too many emotions were swirling around in him, causing him to feel like a hormonal teenager.

"F-Feli!" he gasped. He couldn't stop the lone tear that trickled down his face. He hated crying in front of people yet it happened so often. Feliciano's mouth formed a straight line.

"There will be no tears; tears are for the weak." he said. As if to comfort him, Feliciano took Romano's hand gently, "You are not weak. If I have anything to do with it, this will be the last time you ever shed a tear."

Romano forced himself to calm down and stop crying. Feliciano might be calm now but that didn't mean he couldn't change personalities in a second. He recalled his act and smoothed a determined look on his face. He tightly squeezed Feliciano's hand.

"Help me be stronger!" Romano asked. "I don't want to be..." he paused, struggling to remember what he said to Antonio, "I don't want to be the angry, bratty Italian. I want to help you reign over them all and get revenge for the injustice against us!"

Feliciano grinned deviously, "Of course, fratello. I was help you grow strong and we shall grow and prosper together." he said. His grin turned into a smirk, "Our time of being cowards are over! It's time we took control! This is our time to be a great, vast empire and we shall not fall under anyone's army!"

Romano was finding himself moved by Feliciano's speech. "Yes fratello, we will both rule the world; all continents and countries far and near!" Romano said excited.

"Every person shall quake in fear at the mention of our names!" Feliciano added, a fox-like smirk curving upon his lips.

"No one shall stand in our way; we shall stampede to the top!" Romano grinned.

Feliciano let out a hearty laugh. "You're on the right track, Roma. I think we will just fine!" Feliciano grinned.

"When can I meet our allies?" Romano asked.

"I have arranged a meeting in a few days for you to meet them. I do not wish to share too much since it's still not set on a date. I need to get them all here which is harder than it seems." Feliciano said smiling just to spite himself. Romano began to relax around his fratello.

Feliciano was relaxing around Romano. Romano smiled subconsciously. He was gaining Feliciano's trust. Maybe if he gained enough trust, Feliciano would listen to some of his suggestions, like to not hurt any more countries. For now, he decided to whole heartedly throw himself into Feliciano's plot. If fate decided Feliciano should find out about him spying for the others then so be it.

"Get up." Feliciano ordered. He himself rose from his chair, the chair legs squeaking, and put the chair back by a desk in the corner of the room.

"Get up?" Romano asked. He inwardly groaned. He was still exhausted from the fight and not to mention sore and really wanted to take a nap.

"Yes. Get up now; we're going to train." Feliciano said. He allowed a smile to display his excitement.

Romano sighed quietly and obediently did as he was told. He stood up from the side of the bed and stretched his sore limbs. His face was still sore but at least it wasn't an arm of leg or even chest that hurt. He could fight with the injuries he had.

Feliciano smiled, pleased with him, "Come," he demanded, "We can train outside."

Romano followed as his fratello led him outside. Feliciano took him to a flat patch of land, sparse grass growing and, like the last base's training area, hard packed dirt.

"We'll first start with hand-to-hand. I doubt you'll use it much but you never know." Feliciano said.

"Ok." Romano said.

"Ok?" Feliciano looked at him sharply.

"Um...yes...?" Romano said after a long pause.

"Yes...?" Feliciano offered.

"Yes sir?" Romano said uncertainly.

"Good. Now make a fist." Feliciano ordered. Romano made the best fist he could. Feliciano shook his head, laughing.

"What?" Romano asked looking at his punch. He hardly ever punched; he preferred head butting.

"No. Not like that. First of all, take your thumb out and wrap it around the outside of your fist; you'll break your thumb if you don't. Secondly, there should be a straight line from your elbow to your knuckles. If your wrist is bent, you'll break that as well." Feliciano explained.

Romano made the proper corrections and tried to get used to how it should feel.

"Good. Now take a few practice punches." Feliciano said. Romano did as he was told. He tried to replicate all the boxers and MMA (Mixed Martial Arts) fighters he had seen on the Ultimate Fighter.

"Your form is alright but when you punch, Step into it and put your body into it. Using just your arm won't be as powerful." Feliciano said. Romano tried to remember everything that Feliciano taught him.

"Yes sir." Romano said.

"Ok. Since you've got that down, I want you to take a shot at me and I want you to actually try and hit me." Feliciano ordered.

"Yes sir." Romano said. He leaned slightly into a fighting position. Feliciano smiled approval and also took up a similar stance. Romano made his fist and tried to remember everything Feliciano taught him. He pulled his fist back and exploded his body into the punch.

Feliciano easily dodged the punch. He smiled in approval.

"Your punch was good but I could tell you were going to punch me by the way you pulled your arm back. You need to stay unpredictable so just try not to pull your arm back." Feliciano said. He quickly demonstrated what to do. Romano quickly mirrored his actions, hoping it would please him.

Feliciano smiled. "Very good! You're picking this up quickly!" he said.

Romano smiled, enjoying his praise.

"Now we'll work on defense." Feliciano said. "Keep both hands in proper fists and position them up near your face with your elbows tucked in towards each other." Feliciano said. He did each step as he explained. Romano quickly replicated Feliciano. This part was easy; even a fool could do it. It was learning to put everything together and use it that was the hard part.

"This way, if someone throws a punch as your face, you can move your fists up to block it or vice versa if they try to punch lower like your stomach." Feliciano explained. I'm going to pretend to punch you and I want you to block me."

Romano dipped his head, "Yes sir." he said. He positioned his fists in front of his face. Feliciano spread his feet apart and leaned defensively. Romano quickly assumed the same stance.

Feliciano slowly extended his fist towards Romano's face. The elder Italians arms came up to block the blow.

Feliciano's other fist shot towards his stomach. Romano missed it and Feliciano's fist made contact with his stomach causing Romano to double over slightly.

"The first one was good. You need to think quicker. Your opponents will not go easy on you. Or tell you where they're going to punch you." Feliciano said with a quick laugh.

Romano straightened up and nodded. "Y-Yes sir." he said.

"Good." Feliciano said. "Now again. We do not stop until you are perfect. You will be quick like a cheetah, swift as a fox and as strong as a bear. I want you to think of that as you're doing this."

"Yes sir!" Romano nodded. His heart pounded hard in his chest. He surprised himself with how strong his desire to please Feliciano and show him that he was good was.

He dropped back into position and watched Feliciano carefully. Feliciano switched the order and punched his stomach first, quicker than the last one. Romano quickly blocked. He kept his eyes trained on Feliciano. He saw the fist coming towards his face and blocked it.

Feliciano smiled approval. "Very good. You're getting quicker and sharper but you need to make your movements more fluid."

"Yes sir!" Romano said. He dropped down once again, his eye brows furrowing in determination. Feliciano's fists shot towards Romano's face. Romano quickly moved his arms up but Feliciano faked and his other fist quickly shot to Romano's stomach. Romano's reactions were too slow and Feliciano's fists connected with his stomach again.

"You must be prepared for anything. Your opponents are trying to break you; you have to be ready for anything they throw at you." Feliciano said.

"Yes sir." Romano spit into the grass and got into position again. His eyes darkened in fierce determination. A sly grin spread over Feliciano's face.

Feliciano let out a dark chuckled, "Eager I see. You won't be for long."

He swung a fist at Romano's face with lightening speed. Romano quickly blocked and grabbed Feliciano's fist. He twisted his arm around, pulling Feliciano to him.

"You have to be ready for anything your opponent throws at you." he sneered. A hearty laugh escaped from Feliciano. Romano let him go, smiling slightly.

"Very good fratello. I think you got the hand of both of them. Let's have a match now. If you do well, we'll move on." Feliciano said after he recollected himself. Romano quickly took up his defensive stance. Feliciano assumed the same position.

Both siblings' facial expressions were serious; sharp eyes looking for any hint of movement. Romano threw the first punch. Feliciano quickly dodged and counteracted an attack. Romano blocked and dodged the second fist that came at him.

The two were like this for what seemed like hours; dodging and attacking, spinning and twirling with increasing grace and fluency.

Romano found himself caught in the moment. He wanted to show his fratello he wasn't useless and that he could beat him. Sweat dropped off his brow and his fists were slippery but he could see as more time went on that both he and Feliciano were getting tired.

Romano smirked. He needed to persevere. This could be a huge step in defeating Feliciano in the big shot. Feliciano had placed himself on such a high pedestal. He hadn't considered that his enemies could get stronger just as he had gained strength. All he had to do was beat him in this match and he could lower Feliciano's ego just a notch.

Romano saw the fist coming towards his face as if in slow motion. He grabbed the fist and held it in a solid iron grip. He kicked his leg out, his foot connecting with Feliciano's stomach. Feliciano doubled over ever so slightly. Just ever so slightly that Romano could knock him to the ground with an uppercut.

Romano stood up tall and stood triumphantly over Feliciano. "There is no fair play in war." he said smiling. He offered a hand. "Nice match."

Feliciano, and Romano too, were both panting hard. He smiled tiredly and accepted Romano's hand. "You too fratello. You will be a good fighter."

Romano smirked. "Between the two of us, I think we could easily beat our enemy without our allies help." Romano snickered.

"Perhaps so but our allies will only help us torture our enemy." Feliciano grinned deviously. When Romano tilted his head confused all Feliciano said was, "You'll understand soon."

Romano chuckled. "Keeping things exciting?" he asked. He didn't really understand why Feliciano wouldn't tell him about their allies.

"I prefer a bit of mystery." Feliciano smiled brushing off his clothing. "That and you wouldn't have much faith in our allies if I told you who they were. I believe I've already told you that they too are underestimated but like us, they are stronger than they let on."

"Speaking of which, I can't wait to get back at Ivan!" Romano hissed. He hoped his anger seemed legit enough. He was terrified seeing the Russian again. His face still hurt and he could tell his face didn't look so pretty. He still hasn't looked in the mirror; he wanted to put it off for as long as he could.

"Be patient brother. You'll get your chance." Feliciano smirked. He looked up at the sky. "Back to work. We still need to work on your sword and gun skills. If we have time we can work on knife to knife combat." Feliciano said.

They practiced until it was too dark. By the time they were done, Romano had improved much. Any improvement would have been a huge feat considering Romano didn't know which direction you point a gun. Feliciano was very pleased with his progress and for that Romano was happy.

He was convinced that Feliciano thought Romano was solely loyal to his fratello. Appearing to be loyal to Feliciano was easy when it was just the two of them. The hard part was when Antonio was around.

Romano found it hard to lie to Spain if he saw his big round eyes, teary at the thought of Romano being the enemy. As far as he knew, Antonio still didn't have his memory but Romano was the first person he bonded with ever since he lost his memory.

More than anything, Romano wanted to slap his head for thinking something so preposterous and tell him to stop being such an idiot. Of course, that would blow his cover so they would both have to suck it up and persevere.

"That's enough for today; we'll resume tomorrow. Let's go inside. Sally's cooking pasta." Feliciano said. Sally being Feliciano's personal cook. The two brothers walked side by side so close that their shoulders brushed each others. Both stood proudly and confidently, though the one was walking stiffly. Both were confident that their own goals would work out and both just glad to be with each other.

_Spain's POV_

The Spaniards stomach did summer salts, twisting his gut into a knot. He was absolutely disgusted by this Russia person. He had hurt his Lovi, even after he had passed out. He could have killed him if no body had stopped him.

Spain shuttered at the thought of Romano dying in such a horrible way. His face had already been damaged. He knew there had been many deep scratches judging by the amount of crimson that decorated his face. His nose had been in a different angle than Antonio remembered. It was absolutely sickening.

Even if Romano was truly on Feliciano's side he didn't deserve that. Feliciano was his brother; arguably closer to him than anyone. Of course he would want to be with him.

Antonio found himself wondering where Romano's loyalty's truly lie. His words sounded legit enough and the idea that he and Feliciano shared similar thoughts seemed plausible but there was something in Romano's eyes that through him completely off.

Antonio knew first hand that it was easy to fake emotions with words. It was harder with facial expressions. The eyes were by far the hardest of all to fake. One can not mask over their emotions because every mask needed holes to see out of. No exceptions. It was as simple as black and white. If there were no holes, the mask bearer is unable to see out.

That's why when Romano looked at Antonio with big, round, almost apologetic eyes when he didn't think Feliciano was watching, Antonio knew Romano was trying to send him a message or at least tell him that he was still on their side.

It would be easier if Antonio had all his memories. He only had memories of Romano visiting him in the hospital. If he had been as close with him as he suspected than he might understand Romano's actions better.

Things were extremely confusing without his memory. Every face, every place was new. Even the other people whom he was traveling with were unfamiliar. An albino man had explained a few things to him about who he was and who the other people were that it was hard to remember even just their names. Even the lively albino man who had been the only one to offer any sort of explanation was just another nameless face in the sea of strangers.

Antonio just longed to see Romano. To just see one familiar face.

Back to the matter at hand, Antonio sent a deadly glare at the Russian who had so barbarically beat up his friend. The Russian didn't notice. He just walked beside the short Chinese man with a seemingly innocent smile on his face.

Masks surrounded Antonio everywhere. He was beginning to see how those around him used masks to benefit.

All around him were unfamiliar faces but yet they were all familiar by their masks for they wore the same masks that Romano wore- masks to hide grief, pain- both physical and mental- anger and fear. Everyone in the world wore masks. Some used them more than others and some for even more reasons.

The different variety of masks fascinated Antonio. It made everyone unique. He could practically see all the different colors, shapes and expressions worn but all the different people. He knew everyone needed kindness for every person needed the kindness of a person. Even if it was a strangers kindness rather than the kindness of a loved one.

Spain sighed. All this thinking was starting to confuse him. He just wanted this all the end. He desperately longed to have his memory back or to be able to hold Romano in his arms.

He knew he shouldn't be feeling or thinking the things he does towards another man but he found himself attracted to Romano and his mask. Like the mask at an ancient Greek play, Romano's mask was shaped in an exaggerated frown and was painted in deep blues and blanks.

Having raised Romano for most of the Italians adolescent life Antonio knew Romano better than anyone yet he still couldn't understand why Romano still wouldn't smile around the Spaniard. It was as if he still didn't trust him to stay with him.

Now it seemed as though Romano and Antonio were switching roles. Romano was the one who left Antonio though it wasn't the first time he left. Antonio had tried to stay patient with him. All Romano needed was love. Love could eventually help his Lovino to open up and become more comfortable.

Of course, that didn't happen and if anything Romano became more bitter. Antonio feared that Feliciano leaving had completely shattered any trust Romano had built up. Even though the Italian never would admit it, Antonio knew Romano loved him. He and Feliciano was everything to Romano. Dealing with the decision of who to be loyal to would be extremely hard on him.

Antonio found himself longing again for Romano. He wanted to hold him in his arms and tell him everything would be ok and that he would understand if he choose Feliciano and he would support him in whatever he did. Knowing Romano, he would listen to Antonio but he would yell at him and try to push the Spaniard off. It was one of the things Antonio loved the most about him.

Antonio sighed again. Sighing was becoming quite a habit for him...

"What's wrong, Antonio?" the albino man asked.

"Nothing. I was just thinking." Antonio said.

"Don't worry about Romano. He's strong and he'll be just fine." the other man replied. He flashed Antonio a toothy grin. Antonio chuckled.

"Si. Gracias senior." he smiled. The German laughed gruffly and smirked.

"Anytime." he said. They walked back to the cars they had high jacked after picking Antonio up. Antonio got in a car with the Hungarian woman, the albino, the albinos brother and another German accented man who had raven hair.

The albino ran a pale hand through his silvery locks. "So what now?" he asked.

"I honestly don't know, Gilbert." the raven haired man said. "What can we do?"

"We can go back with an army and kick his arse!" Gilbert exclaimed.

The Hungarian sighed and slapped the back of the albinos head only half playfully. "Be realistic! Where are we going to get an army at?" she snapped.

Gilbert rubbed the back of his head tenderly. "How should I know? You're all countries- not me." he said coldly. The Hungarian sighed.

"I'm sorry Gilbert. You know I didn't mean it that way." she said gently.

"Ja. I know you didn't Liz." Gilbert said looking out the window, finding something more interesting to look at.

"Can we get back on task? What are we going to do?" the raven haired man said. Antonio really wished he could remember all their names. He could only remember two which was only because they said it.

"We need to regroup and gather more ideas. Maybe it'd be a good idea to stay in Italy for now. We know where their hideout is and if he decides to move we'll just track them down." Elizabetha said.

"Not to sound like Ivan or anything but why don't we just bomb Italy? They've given us enough reasons too and with Romano on their side now we don't have to worry about hurting him." Gilbert said. Both Antonio and Gilbert's brother stiffened.

"No!" they said in unison.

"Romano is still fighting for us! He's just spying!" Antonio exclaimed.

"Antonio, he was fighting _against_ us today." Elizabetha pointed out gently.

"No! I mean, yeah he was but he is still on our side! Why else would he send us the directions to the base? They didn't kill any of us so it can only mean that Romano did it secretly!" Antonio said. There was a silence as the others considered this new idea.

"That could make sense..." Roderick said.

"And we're not positive so we can't hurt Romano just because of an assumption." Antonio added desperately. He knew he couldn't hurt Romano and he wasn't going to let anyone else hurt him if he could help it.

"Ok. Just chill dude. We're not making any set plans." Gilbert said. Both Antonio and Gilbert's brother sighed in relief.

"Let's go some place. I'm sure Russia would like to rest. That cut looked like it hurt." Roderick said.

Gilbert snorted, "Good. Serves him right." he grumbled.

Elizabetha elbowed his ribs and shot him a disapproving glare.

Antonio couldn't help but smile. He couldn't say he was upset by the Russians wounds. If anything, he wished he had caused them.

Soon enough he would see Romano again and he would know if he was alright. Hopefully by then he had regained his memories so he could tell Romano everything he remembered about him. He knew it would make the Italian happy and more than anything he just wanted to see the Italian smile.

_A/N:_ Heya guys! I started a new story and so far there are no reviews. It's called Protector so take a look at it and review if you're feeling up to it. Also...HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Eat lots of turkey and get really fat! XD I wanna know what your thankful for so tell me when you review!


	20. Chapter 20

**Lost. Chapter 20.**

**A/N:** Omg! 20 chapters! I'm so happy! So what's up dawg? Oh, sorry this is up so late. I hadn't written the other chapter and I was waiting for more reviews. Only four for the last chapter on FF. : (

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song below. (Sorry this song doesn't really fit the chapter but I really wanted to put a Black Veil Brides song in here. They're a great screamo band if you haven't heard them and the guys are cross dressers.)

_GO!  
><em>

_Awake at night you focus,  
>On everyone who's hurt you.<br>Then write a list of targets,  
>Your violent lack of virtue.<br>_

_LEAVE US ALONE!  
>YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN!<br>GO!  
><em>

_We are breathing,  
>While you're sleeping, go, (GO!)<br>And leave us alone.  
>The lines cheated,<br>Our hearts beating, go, (GO!)  
>And now you're on your own.<br>_

_Here's to your perfect weapon,  
>Crack bones with blind aggression.<br>Like birds whose wings are broken,  
>You live without direction.<em>

_LEAVE US ALONE!  
><em>

_YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN!  
><em>

_We are breathing,  
>While you're sleeping, go, (GO!)<br>And leave us alone.  
>The lines cheated,<br>Our hearts beating, go, (GO!)  
>And now you're on your own.<br>_

_GO!  
>GO!<br>GO!  
>GO!<br>AND NOW YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN!  
>GO!<br>GO!  
>AND LEAVE US ALONE!<br>_

_We are breathing,  
>While you're sleeping, go, (GO!)<br>And leave us alone.  
>The lines cheated,<br>Our hearts beating, go, (GO!)  
>And now you're on your own.<em>

Lyrics to Perfect Weapon by Black Veil Brides

_France's POV_

The hospital did not help Francis' condition. Since Francis' body was reacting to the destruction on his capital the only that could make his condition improve was the improvement and rebuild of his city.

One of his fellow countries (though Francis didn't know who or how) had succeeded on getting him out of the hospital. A nurse came into the room to help him out of the bed and into his normal clothes.

Francis would have been ashamed of himself for not trying to flirt with the young female nurse or try to get a lay out of her right on the hospital bed but he found that he could hardly think about something like that when Arthur was in danger. He feared that Arthur would get hurt or die and he'd end up like Arthur was; lonely, depressed and a shell of his former self.

He feared for Arthur. Even though he had made a tremendous step into his recovery he still had a long way to go.

He was willing to wait until Arthur was ready before they started seeing each other, if Arthur even wanted to. Francis was getting too hopeful thinking he could finally have the Brit he had loved for so long.

He had to constantly remind himself that Arthur might not want him or might find something else. Francis didn't want to get his heart broken but he couldn't ignore what his heart was screaming at him though his brain told him something entirely different.

Francis was eagerly awaiting Arthur's wait and was hoping Arthur was eager to see him. It was foolish in his eyes. Childish.

He had been in many relationships before but he viewed all of them as objects or toys to have fun with. Arthur had been the first person he viewed as a person whom he could love more then just sex. He didn't want to do that with Arthur. He wanted to know what it was like to be loved not just because of how he was in bed.

He sighed. He had better things to think of. His country was in shambles and his people were dying. Italy was still harboring his not so discrete murderous feelings. He didn't have time to worry about love or his personal life. He had a duty to his country to take care of.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the open door. Francis turned his head as did the nurse that Francis had forgotten was there even though she had a shapely figure with luscious breasts.

Another nurse stood in the door though not as shapely. "Francis Bonnefoy?"

Francis just nodded. The nurse at the door motioned to someone in the hallway, "He's still in here." she said quietly. She and the nurse in the room left as Arthur entered.

Right away, Francis could tell something was wrong. Arthur hurried into the room and hugged him while being cautious of the Frenchman's wounds. This action scared Francis. The Brit never hugged. Never.

"What's wrong, Arthur?" Francis asked. Though his own fears of something happening to Arthur were soothed, his fear for the others rose. Arthur pulled back allowing Francis to quickly scan him for any injuries or indication to what was wrong.

The Brits clothing was rumpled and his hair tussled but there was no wounds that Francis could see. His facial expression was bashful and reminded Francis of when Ivan threw cats out his window (*historical reference*).

"Romano's fighting with Feliciano." Arthur said. Francis immediately thought of Antonio. He wondered how he felt about Romano's betrayal. "And Ivan beat him up! Feliciano had to interlope or Ivan would have killed him!"

Francis was slightly hopeful. Feliciano still cared about his brother. Maybe that could use that to their advantage. He smiled and looked at Arthur's face.

"That's great!" he smiled. Arthur looked up at him, tears shining in the corners of his emerald pools.

"No it's not!" Arthur whispered. Francis gently brushed his hair.

"What are you talking about Angleterre? He still cares about Romano. Maybe we won't have to kill him." Francis said gently.

"But I want him dead!" Arthur burst out, surprising them both. "Why should he save Romano from death when he killed my Alfred? I want him to pay for hurting Alfred and you!"

Francis felt only but compassion. "Arthur, Alfred wouldn't want that. He would say that heroes don't want other people to die." Francis said.

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "No! He would say heroes kill the bad guy to prevent others from being hurt!" he snapped. Francis gently touched his arm.

"Arthur, I'm not trying to soil your memory of Alfred or anything. It's just that Feliciano is my brother and I don't want him getting hurt." Francis said gently. Arthur's face depicted the mixed emotions he was battling.

"I'm sorry! I-I never thought of how you would still be attached to him." Arthur said. He took a deep breath, showing his conflicting emotions. "I'm sorry but I still want him to die. He will pay for what he did to you and Alfred."

The way he said that with such confidence scared Francis. What was Arthur becoming?

"Arthur, does he really deserve death? He hasn't committed nearly the amount of atrocities that Germany did in WWII. We got Ludwig back even though he was pretty crazy then. Shouldn't we give Feli that chance too?" Francis said ever so softly. He didn't want to offend the Brit in any way.

"No. Ludwig never actually killed a representation of a country. This is nearly unspeakable for our kind and for that, he must die!" Arthur said, his tone getting angrier. His body was tense and his face red. Francis gently rubbed the tops of his arms in a soothing manor.

"Arthur, I understand." Francis said in a whisper. He could easily feel Arthur relax under his touch. "Just please don't take my brother from me."

With that final blow, Arthur stiffened again. Francis had said the last phrase with such sadness that Arthur didn't know what to do. His head tipped down, his golden hair casting shadows over his face.

Francis searched for any holes to see a hint at his facial expression. He was so confused as to what the Brit was doing. One minute he was strong and confident when he was nearly crying the next. Francis started rubbing his arms a little more vigorously.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Francis asked concerned. Arthur's shoulders shook slightly.

"I'm sorry." he whispered. It was so quiet that Francis hardly heard him.

"Amor, there's nothing to apologize for." Francis said softly.

"Yes there is! I'm such a monster for wanting to kill him! How could I think such a horrible thing and let such a horrible thing happen?" Arthur cried out.

Francis' was completely confused now, "Let what happen?" He extended a hand to gently brush Arthur's hair so he could see his face but Arthur flinched away from him. Francis drew his hand back, trying not to let Arthur's motion sting him.

"They're going to kill Feliciano!" Arthur exclaimed with pure confidence. There was no doubt in the Brits voice that it wasn't going to happen. Francis' frail heart beat against his chest.

"W-what?" he chocked out. "How do you know?" His throat constricted making it hard and painful to speak.

"I'm sorry Francis. I supported them in killing him. I don't think they'll change their mind. Even Ludwig couldn't make them change their mind." Arthur said.

Francis felt the little strength in his knees slowly ebb away. He half sat, half fell down on the bed.

"Francis?" Arthur exclaimed. He rushed to the Frenchman's side. Francis had covered his face with his hands. He pulled himself away from the real world, hiding himself in the safe spaces of his mind. He couldn't hear Arthur's voice or feel the gentle touch of his hand on his shoulder.

"My little Feli!" he whispered. He remembered all the times Feliciano had come to visit him and all the meetings. He was always so sweet and considerate of others. How could they think of killing him?

Arthur pulled the Frenchman into a hug. "Oh Francis," he said in a whisper. "I'm sorry."

Hidden in the deep recesses of his mind, Francis could tell he wasn't helping Arthur's fragile condition.

Francis gently wrapped his arms around Arthur's form. Arthur's tense muscles relaxed under Francis' comforting touch.

Both rested their head on the others shoulders. Their warm breath gently tickled the others skin. They both shared a feeling of loss and their growing yet fragile bonds felt stronger. Both were comforted by each others presence, knowing they weren't alone and that they had someone else to cry on.

"It's not your fault Angleterre; I don't blame you." Francis whispered into his ear, causing Arthur to shiver.

"You don't?" Arthur asked in disbelief.

"If I was in your position I would want the same thing. I just wish it wasn't Feli." Francis said quietly.

"I know you do. I'm so sorry." Arthur said softly. A gentle hand reached up to gently pet Francis' hair. The Frenchman closed his eyes, all his fears and sadness being soothed by his simple touch. He allowed himself to enjoy the bliss, knowing it would disappear as soon as Arthur wasn't touching him.

After a while Francis pulled away. "Amor, why don't we go now?" he suggested. He felt colder without Arthur's warm hold. He felt as though Arthur had taken a part of him when their hug ended. He wanted to hold the Brit and never let go.

A light blush dusted Arthur's cheeks. Francis was comforted by the action glad that Arthur was slowly recovering.

"Yeah. I bet you're tired of being here." Arthur said.

Francis just nodded. Arthur slipped his arm under Francis' and helped take some weight off of the Frenchman's weak legs. Francis' smiled appreciatively and followed the Brit to the parking lot where a car was waiting.

In one car held Gilbert, Roderick, Elizabetha, Ludwig and Antonio. The other car concealed Ivan, Yao, Kiku, Mei and Matthew. The car was large enough to carry both Arthur and Francis. They got inside the car and buckled their seatbelts.

"Hello Francis, aru!" Yao greeted him upon entering the car.

"I expect you are feeling better, da?" Ivan asked. The massive Russian was driving the car. He glanced back in the mirror, smiling sweetly. Francis easily smiled. The Brits hand was lightly touching his making him happy.

"Oui, I am. Merci." Francis said.

Ivan giggled. "Why are you begging for mercy already? I didn't even bring out my pipe yet~." he said. Yao, sitting in the passenger seat, looked uncomfortable.

"Yet, aru?" he squeaked.

Ivan just closed his eyes and smiled, "Ufu!" he giggled.

Yao scooted away. Ivan frowned almost playfully and looked at him. "What is wrong, Yao? You know I'd never hurt you."

Yao just laughed uneasily, obviously hoping he'd please Ivan. With Alfred gone, Ivan was the strongest nation and would be their best ally along with China, considering his population.

Francis nearly jumped out of his skin when Arthur leaned his head on Francis' shoulder. His eyes dropped until they were half closed. A gentle smile graced Francis' features. His heart thumped pleasantly against his rib cage, temporarily relieving him of his almost constant chest pain.

He moved his arm and gently draped it around the Brits shoulders and pulled him closer.

"Go ahead and sleep, Angleterre. I'll wake you up when we get there." Francis whispered softly. His breath moved a few golden strands of hair causing the Brit to blush.

Being as tired as he was, Arthur's emerald eyes closed. His breathing deepened signaling his sleep.

All other conversations drowned out into silence. All other background noises and distractions melted away until it was just Arthur and Francis. Francis allowed a gentle smile. With Arthur in his arms and leaning on him, everything in his chest felt whole. He had found the feeling he had been longing and searching for.

Somehow though, something didn't feel right. In normal circumstances, Arthur wouldn't cuddle him like this in public. He wouldn't have trusted Francis enough to fall asleep. Perhaps though Arthur had changed because of Alfred's death, causing him to show more emotion. Either way, Francis liked the new Arthur. He enjoyed cuddling him and being trusted and needed by him.

He gently kissed the top of Arthur's golden haired head and leaned his cheek into his soft locks. His familiar scent wreathed around him, completing his feeling of peace.

His whole country could have been obliterated and he would have been content if his last moments had been spend with Arthur in his arms.

**A/N:** More action starting up real soon! Please review! I know at least 49 people are getting alerts for this so I'd love if you'd drop me a review! You don't even have to log in. Just click the button and write at least one word like yes or no for if you like the story. Thankies!


	21. Chapter 21

**Lost. Chapter 21**

**A/N:** Yay! Some good stuff in this chapter. I hope you enjoy it! Character names at bottom of chapter. I don't wanna spoil the stuff so just look down if you see a name you don't know. .

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own Hetalia or the song used below.

_Scream, shout, scream, shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>_

_We are the in between  
>Cast down as sons of war<br>Struck to the earth like lightning  
>On this world we're torn<br>_

_We won't cause the pain  
>Of living out their law<br>Take joy in who you are  
>We know our wings are flawed<br>_

_We're bored to death in heaven  
>And down alone in hell<br>We only want to be ourselves  
><em>

_We scream, we shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>We scream, we shout, woah, woah  
>To those who sing alone<br>No need to feel this sorrow  
>We scream, we shout, woah<br>We are the fallen angels  
><em>

_Follow the morning star  
>A land where darkness failed<br>The passion left unholy  
>Now you found yourself<br>_

_We have nowhere to go  
>No one to wish us well<br>A cry to find our home  
>Our stories they will tell<br>_

_We're bored to death in heaven  
>And down alone in hell<br>We only want to be ourselves  
><em>

_We scream, we shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>We scream, we shout, woah, woah  
>To those who sing alone<br>No need to feel this sorrow  
>We scream, we shout, woah<br>We are the fallen angels  
><em>

_Scream, shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>Scream, shout, woah, woah  
><em>

_We scream, we shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>We scream, we shout, woah, woah  
>To those who sing alone<br>No need to feel this sorrow  
>We scream, we shout, woah<br>We are the fallen angels  
><em>

_We scream, we shout  
>We are the fallen angels<br>We scream, we shout, woah, woah, woah, woah  
>We shout, woah<br>We are the fallen angels_

Lyrics to Fallen Angels by Black Veil Brides

_Romano's POV_

Almost as reward for his loyalty, Feliciano started coming around a lot more. He ate dinner and lunch with Romano and he took his breaks with him. They would just talk and laugh about nothing and Romano would try to sound enthusiastic about their plans. Feliciano let Romano sleep in more and stay up later. Romano was always tired from their daily training so he was grateful when he first realized that Feliciano came to wake him up at ten in the morning.

This day was different though. Their usual schedule consisted of Feliciano coming to wake Romano up at ten. He then looked at Romano's wounds and took care of them. Romano, being a country, healed fast. Most of his shallower cuts had healed while some of the deeper ones were just faint lines. Regardless, Feliciano insisted in taking care of them until they were completely healed. He firmly believed that he should treat his allies how he would expect them to treat him.

After tending to his wounds and eating a quick breakfast, Feliciano and Romano would go out to the training area to train once again. With the extensive practice, both brothers had improved their skills significantly and could be considered experts.

Romano had practically perfected his hand to hand combat and was doing well in his sword and gun training. He practiced sword fighting with Feliciano and was an admirable opponent but still had room for improvement. He also had started shooting at long distance and moving targets and was doing well. Feliciano was very pleased with him.

However, this morning he woke Romano up at 7:00. Romano, being tired and not used to getting up at that time, groaned and turned onto his side.

"Mmm...Five more minutes." he groaned forgetting where he was at. He shut his eyes tightly willing sleep to come. He pulled the covers up over his head to block out any light. He was suddenly left to clutch thin air as Feliciano yanked the covers off of him.

"Get up. I let you sleep in as long as I could and now I've only got five minutes to check your wounds before the meeting with our allies." Feliciano said. Romano's eyes snapped open remembering where he was and his reason for being there.

He sat up in bed, hitting foreheads with Feliciano. Romano braced himself for the yelling and possible beating he constantly feared but nothing of the sorts came. Instead, Feliciano started laughing, and not the usual cruel laugh he irrupted with when he heard good news evolving something bad happening to the other countries. It was pure and innocent like the old Feliciano. Overcome with happiness and joy, Romano started laughing as well.

The two brothers laughed until tears shimmered in their eyes. Feliciano chuckled as he calmed down.

"Ok. We've got to really hurry now." he said. Romano sat up in bed and stayed still as Feliciano looked at his wounds. Judging by the smile on Feliciano's features, his wounds were almost all healed.

"Hurry up and get dressed. We'll be in the basement." Feliciano said. Romano dipped his head and started to get dressed. "Also, I ask that you don't forget to keep an open mind. Our allies might not seem worthy but I assure you they are strong."

Romano's lips cracked a smile. "Yes, fratello." he said. Feliciano smiled again. Romano hoped his fratello's heart was softening being around Romano so much. Feliciano quickly departed the room, leaving Romano to get dressed alone with himself and his thoughts.

Now he was curious about their allies. He had given up trying to guess who it was. He had simply resigned to finding out who it was at the meeting. Now that the meeting was so close his curiosity was starting to knawl at him. He quickly stumbled towards the hallway as he yanked the jeans up his legs and into place. He pulled his shirt on at the top of the staircase and hurried down.

In less than a minute, Romano was hurrying down the stairs of the basement. His chest was beating hard in anticipation and his fingers were beginning to itch with impatience. His feet ate up the distance between him and satisfying his curiosity.

He wanted to know who he was fighting with and who he would be possibly fighting against at some point. These people could make or break Feliciano even though Feliciano was confident on winning himself. As much as he didn't want Feliciano succeed he also didn't want to see him crash and burn. He hadn't ever endured the things that Ludwig did when his country failed. Romano didn't want him and his fratello to be broken up or even dissolved like Prussia. He hoped that the others might be merciful and not kill Feliciano.

He could only wonder who their allies were though. He couldn't think of any other people that would be willing to fight with Feliciano and would be as strong as Feliciano perceived them to be. He hoped they were strong enough to help Feliciano and maybe take some of the blame.

To say he was surprised to see Lithuania, Poland, Latvia, Estonia and Sealand (See bottom of chapter for human names.) would be an understatement.

They were always who Romano thought were the weakest of all the countries or the goofiest, in Poland's case. He wouldn't have expected either of them to join Feliciano's side let alone to earn Feliciano's trust.

Felixs was sitting beside Toris, Ravias and Eduardo were sitting nearby and Peter was sitting at the chair to one side of Feliciano. There was still one vacant chair sitting beside Feliciano, opposite of Peter.

"Welcome Romano." Feliciano smiled. Romano narrowed his eyes and frowned. All eyes were trained on him. The familiar feeling of being judged washed over him. He scowled and tried to look as unwelcoming as possible. It was his natural self defense now and even though he knew Feliciano wanted him to be with them he still felt as though the others didn't want him on their side.

"Hi." Romano greeted them stiffly.

"No need to be so sour, Romano. We like you here." Feliciano said, striking a welcoming smile. The others smiled as well; it seemed genuine enough.

"I believe you know everyone here but I think it'd be a good idea to reintroduce ourselves and tell each other why we're here." Feliciano said smiling happily, "Then we can better understand each other and can maybe trust each others strengths more."

"Like, why do we need to do that? That's totally stupid!" Felix asked waving his hand in an exaggerated manner.

Feliciano's enthusiasm was not depleted. "We are all misjudged but you have all passed your tests, which is quite an achievement. I had others come and they didn't pass it. Rest assured they will not give us away because we have men waiting to act if they decide to give us away. However, I think it'd be a good idea to tell our stories so we can all be on the same page. We function as a team not as individuals." Feliciano said still smiling, though it was not his usual smile.

Romano took the liberty of sitting down in the empty chair. He noticed how Feliciano and Peter seemed to be sitting exceptionally close then any of the others, even Felix or Toris.

"So, who would like to go first?" Feliciano asked. He glanced around the table hopefully.

After a while, Toris tentatively raised his hand. "I will." he volunteered in a soft spoken voice.

"Yeah! Go Toris!" Felixs said causing Toris to blush.

"Ok well...I'm Lithuania or Toris. I...I decided to join Feliciano because I'm really tired of being controlled and taken advantage of by Russia." Toris said. As he continued, his anger picked up giving him confidence. His volume increased steadily, "I want to control myself now and show Russia that I can beat him!"

"I second that!" Eduardo spoke up passionately.

"Third!" Ravias exclaimed standing up.

"Well there we go. Three birds with one stone. Felixs, how about you go next?" Feliciano asked.

"Ok. I'm like, Poland. You can totally call me Felixs though. But you already know that." Felixs grinned. "So like, I'm tired of Russia separating me from Toris and he like totally invaded me and I want to kick his arse."

"I'd like to go next! Don't forget me!" Peter exclaimed raising his hand enthusiastically.

Feliciano chuckled, "I could never forget you." he said. He gently leaned over, taking Peters chin gently and placed a heartfelt kiss on his pink lips. Romano's eyes widened in surprise as Peter blushed and leaned into his touch like a dog.

The kiss only lasted a few moments but it was plain to see the emotions running between the two. They were in love.

"Ok," Peter leaned away and continued as if nothing had happened, "So I sick of Arthur not acknowledging me as a country! I've told him time and time again and he's such a jerk and doesn't acknowledge me as part of his family!" Peter exclaimed.

Feliciano smiled affectionately though Romano could see lust gleaming in his chocolate eyes. "Good. Romano, you're next." he said. Romano scowled again as all eyes turned to look at him.

"Well," he started, trying to remember the story he said yesterday. He decided that it was easier to just rant about his treatment as a child, "I hate that no body wanted me as a child and always gave me up just because I didn't do my work or because I swore a lot! I want to show them that I am useful and that people do want me!" Romano said.

Feliciano understood how much it took for Romano to say that so openly. He didn't realize though was that the reason why he said that was so then he could gain more of Feliciano's trust.

"I think you all know but since you all did it I suppose it's only fair if I explain as well." Feliciano said, "I hate how everyone thinks that I'm just the happy, dumb, clueless Italian. They always look on the surface and were too worried about their own problems to think about how I felt when they would look at me like I was some disgusting thing or when they threatened me or tried to hurt me,

"They will all pay for their mistakes." Feliciano vowed to them. His gaze darkened as well as everyone else in the room. Romano balled his hands into fists and tried to blend in.

"When?" Toris demanded.

"Just wait, I am getting to that," Feliciano said, "Before I tell you when I need you all to remember that we have a man amongst our enemy."

"Who?" Romano asked before he could stop himself. Luckily, Feliciano seemed pleased at his curiosity.

"Our other ally is Matthew Williams." Feliciano said. The others didn't seem surprised but the news was hard for Romano to grasp. Mattie? The same Mattie whose brother was murdered and whose father's country was bombed? How could he ever support in something that would cause that amount of damage to the people he loved?

"Ok, our plan is Mattie is going to send us the address of where they're staying at and a count of persons and weaponry." Feliciano said. He paused to glance around at the others who nodded in agreement, "Ok. So once we have said information we will attack. I believe Mattie said he had something in mind with Francis that I have approved of. Baltic's, you can do whatever you like with Russia and the same goes to Romano with Spain."

"What about me?" Peter asked.

Feliciano smiled affectionately. "You can do anything you want to Arthur though you may not kill him or kidnap him. I still have plans for him and everyone but you will get your revenge soon enough." Feliciano said. When Peter pouted, Feliciano continued explaining, "Think of it this way, we will just prolong his torture."

With that statement being said, Peter grinned.

"Ok. You will all be contacted when we have the information. Anything else?" Feliciano asked.

Everyone shook their heads.

"Alright then. I have sent each of you uniforms to wear. I expect you to wear them whenever we meet from now on. Meeting adjourned. We will meet back here before we attack." Feliciano grinned darkly.

"Remember, we strike as one. Stick to our plan and everything will work our way." Feliciano grinned deviously.

**A/N:** Heres the character names of the new people:

Poland: Felix

Lithuania: Toris

Sealand: Peter

Estonia: Eduardo

Latvia: Ravias

Sorry this one was so short! The next one will be better and longer, I guarantee it! Much more action and even some character deaths! Please review and I might update more quickly. By the way... 20 REVIEWS IN FANFICTION ALONE! I love you guys Soooo much! If you can review like that all the time you will make me so happy and I shall reward you with faster chapters and maybe a hint as to the sequel if I finish this.

Just some questions for you:

1. Who do you think will be killed?

2. What do you think the outcome of the story will be?

Thankies and review please!


	22. Chapter 22

**Lost. Chapter 22**

**A/N:** MORE ACTION. :O I've been waiting for this one forever! I accidentally made a mistake. Someone informed me (I'm sorry, I forget who and I'm too lazy to go look. Nothing personal at all, I promise! I've been having horrible memory as of late) that Estonia's (I think it was Estonia...I can't remember who and I'm too lazy to look it up right now) had the wrong human name. I think it was supposed to be Eduard and not Eduardo. But just now when I went to type Eduard it changed it to Eduardo so yay! Cruddy autocheck!

**TheRebelX3:** I'm sorry! You're gonna hate me after this chapter. XD Hope you enjoy it anyway!

Also, I couldn't decide weather to play Leave Out All The Rest by Linkin Park or the song that is chosen so I'll just suggest that you look up the song I didn't use as well as the sing I put for this chapter. Sorry if your not a fan of rock. That's about the only type of genre that fits this. I got some MJ in mind and maybe some country so it will be spiced up. I really hate it when people say they only listen or read something. I am a firm believer of branching out and liking a wide variety of things.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below. Also, I quoted a line from the song 'Issues' by Mindless Self Indulgence.

_I feel insane every single time  
>I'm asked to compromise<br>Cause I'm afraid and stuck in my ways  
>And that's the way it stays<br>So how long did I expect love to outweigh ignorance?  
>By that look on your face I may have forced the scale to tip<em>

_I'm not insane, I'm not insane  
>I'm not insane, I'm not - not insane<em>

_(Mother)  
>Come back to me, it's almost easy<br>(Said it all)  
>Come back again, it's almost easy<em>

_Shame pulses through my heart  
>From the things I've done to you<br>It's hard to face, but the fact remains  
>That this is nothing new<em>

_I left you bound and tied with suicidal memories  
>Selfish beneath the skin<br>But deep inside I'm not insane.  
><em>

_I'm not insane, I'm not insane.  
>I'm not insane, I'm not - not insane.<em>

_(Mother)  
>Come back to me, it's almost easy<br>(Said it all)  
>Come back again, it's almost easy<br>(You'll learn your lesson)  
>Come back to me, it's almost easy<br>(But first you fall)  
>Come back again, it's almost easy<em>

_Now that I've lost you it kills me to say  
>(Hurts to say)<br>I've tried to hold on as you've slowly slipped away.  
>I'm losing the fight.<br>I've treated you so wrong, now let me make it right.  
>(Make it all right)<em>

_I'm not insane, I'm not insane. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha  
>I'm not insane, I'm not - not insane.<em>

_(Mother)  
>Come back to me, it's almost easy<br>(Said it all)  
>Come back again, it's almost easy<br>(You'll learn your lesson)  
>Come back to me, it's almost easy<br>(But still you fall)  
>Come back again, it's almost easy<em>

Lyrics to Almost Easy by Avenged Sevenfold.

_France's POV_

Turns out Antonio had purchased a large cabin in a remote area in Italy for when he took Romano on get aways. He would not gave known about it had it not been for reading a journal he had tried to keep. He had only written for the duration of a month. Luck had graced them for once and he had written down the address of the cabin.

After their unfaithful meeting with Feliciano and Romano, Arthur had come to retrieve Francis from the hospital. While the Brit went into the hospital Yao had patched up Ivan's chest as best as he could. The wound was large but shallow so it hadn't endangered the big Russians life in any way.

They traveled to the cabin successfully without running into any trouble. Upon entering the cabin Matthew excused himself to make a phone call outside. Of course, no one noticed. Francis was too busy helping the others to notice the Canadian.

Francis glanced at the clock and noticed the time. His stomach growled and he blushed. He went over to Arthur and bent down so he could reach his ear.

"I'm going to make something to eat. Would you like me to make you something?" Francis asked quietly.

Arthur looked up at him, his emerald eyes wide with concern, "A...are you sure? Are you feeling well enough?" Arthur asked.

"Oui, I'm feeling well. I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't." Francis said smirking lightly.

"Are you sure? I can make you some food if you like." Arthur offered.

"No!" Francis quickly exclaimed. Arthur's eyes flashed with hurt before being masked by confusion. Francis immediately felt guilty. "I mean that you should rest."

"You need to rest more." Arthur pointed out.

"Then why don't you help me." Francis suggested with a smile. He silently hoped that the Brit would say yes. Even though the British man cooked horribly Francis enjoyed his company.

"Ok." Arthur said. His lips curled slightly upward in a smile. Francis smiled broadly, not even bothering to hide his happiness.

"Great! I'm sure we can make something good from the cans of food that Antonio said were in the cabinets!" Francis said.

The Frenchman and Englishman walked to the kitchen walking so close that their shoulders were touching. There weren't many cans of food but Francis quickly came up with a clever idea to make soup.

In less then an hour, Francis and Arthur were happily slurping up their soup. They sat on the small table diagonal from each other. They hardly spoke but no words were needed. Both men were comfortable in the silence. As Francis had once heard, "You know you've found a good friend when you don't feel the need to fill the silence."

Affection for the Brit was strong and growing stronger. The sight of the golden haired man made his heart beat hard against his chest, the little moments where their skin touched sent shivers through his entire body and when he smelled the familiar scent of tea on him, his nose seemed to breathe a sigh of relief.

Luckily, the Spaniard had some tea bags in the back of the pantry. Arthur had been able to make a cup of hot tea and was currently nursing his cup, deeply drinking in the warm scent.

The Frenchman smiled at Arthur but not his usual smile. He had realized that this tragedy had changed a lot of people. Arthur was quieter and mellower while Francis was calmer and wasn't being a flirt.

Francis didn't mind the new changes though he missed the way the Brit used to stiffen and gawk at the how rude the Frenchman was. He did however like how Arthur was starting to show more emotion. Before, Arthur would not be caught dead hugging anyone. Francis' was not a man who hugged often but he was the country of love and he loved to show affection (even though most countries saw his show of affection as a way to say 'Excuse me, do you want to screw?').

Arthur smiled at Francis timidly, "The soup is delicious." he said. Francis smiled sadly. The British man never used to compliment him either.

"Merci, Angleterre." Francis smiled, flashing some teeth in order to cheer Arthur up. Arthur just blushed and looked into his cup of tea.

Just as Francis was about to speak again, there was a loud noise at the door. Both men stiffened and looked up.

Shouts of alarm were shouted by their allies as Romano, Matthew, Peter, Toris, Feliks, Ravias and Eduard entered the cottage. Peter tapped on Matthews shoulder and pointed to where Francis and Arthur were sitting together. The two intruders drew swords from their sheaths and raced to Francis and Arthur.

Both countries were so confused that they both dove out of the way. Both still had their weapons on which was drawn quickly.

Before Francis could see if Arthur was alright, Matthews sword cut through the air, aimed at Francis' neck. Francis quickly blocked with his swords. He looked into his child's amethyst eyes, confused by his anger.

"Mattie, what are you doing?" he asked in a heartbroken tone. His arms began to tremble and he was already getting tired. Matthew just smirked at Francis' weakness.

"Now you have time for me, eh?" he asked coldly. Francis blinked in confusion.

"Amor, I'm confused." Francis said gently, "Let's just stop fighting and talk this out like men."

"Talk this like men? That's a woman's thing!" Mattie exclaimed scornfully. "You only want to talk this out because you're too weak to fight! You never could fight for yourself after Napoleons death and Alfred isn't around to bail you out this time!"

Mattie's words stung almost as much as his sword would but they sparked an idea. He was able to grab a quick breath as Mattie drew his sword back. His relief was short lived as he swung his sword at him again. Most of his energy had been zapped from him. His chest heaved and he was starting to sweat.

"Matthew, Alfred wouldn't want this!" he panted out. Instead of getting the reaction he wanted, he got the exact opposite. Matthew's eyes darkened in anger and his fingers turned white as he gripped his sword tighter.

"Alfred is the cause of all my problems!" he yelled angrily. He slashed his sword down swiftly and was only just angry to block it.

"Matthew, Alfred loved you very much. He didn't mean anything he did." Francis said gently, trying to calm Matthew.

"Oh yeah? Then why didn't he ever notice me? Why did he forget who I was and still called himself a hero? I needed a hero; he could have been a hero for me but he wasn't!" Mattie screeched.

"Well you got what you wanted then; you killed your brother." Francis said coldly. Arthur was suffering so much from the Americans death and yet Alfred's own brother was happy about it.

Mattie laughed as if what he had said was ironic. "Heh, I didn't kill him. I was just lucky that one of Feliciano's bombs had killed Alfred. It could have very easily have been you that died and I could be fighting Alfred instead. It wouldn't matter to me either way; I hate you both." Mattie said smirking slightly, "I bet you that Arthur would have been happier if you had died rather than Alfred."

His words struck deep. All facial expression had morphed to sadness. Matthews's words were true; if Francis had died rather than Alfred Arthur wouldn't be in the sad state he was in. Arthur could still have love without guilt that he was cheating on his dead lover.

Francis took a few steps back, "You're right. It should have been me that died." he whispered.

"Everyone would be happier if you died. No one loves you; you've never been loved. You're country just take up space that others could use for better purposes. You use resources that other people would gladly take." Mattie snarled. He kept advancing on Francis until he backed the Frenchman into the wall.

Matthew suddenly advanced and pressed his elbow into Francis' neck, cutting off his air. Blue eyes widened in fear and pain. He dropped his sword, unable to cause Matthew any pain, and weakly tried to pry Matthews arm off of his throat.

"Just give it up, old man. Just die." Matthew snarled. His mouth curved into a smile as Francis choked. The Frenchman's lungs screamed for oxygen. His eyes threatened to close; his eye lids getting too heavy to keep open. His arms slackened, his attempts to free himself getting weaker.

He lost his will to fight; his body sagging against Matthew and his eyes closed in surrender to unconsciousness.

_England's POV_

His sword clashed with Peters. The smaller country narrowed his eyes hatefully. Unlike Mattie, Peter fought Arthur mercifully. Metal clanged against metal. The reflection danced on the ceiling and danced in both men's eyes.

"S...Sealand!" Arthur stammered.

"Don't say my name!" Peter snarled hatefully, "You wouldn't accept me before and I don't want it now!"

"Peter, I'm sorry!" Arthur exclaimed. He spun quickly to avoid the blade aimed at him. He quick turned to block Sealand's swing. He didn't try to take any hits on Sealand, unable to hurt his brother.

Peter's eyes flashed with anger, "You're only sorry because I'm getting stronger!" Peter yelled, "Your too self absorbed to ever care about me or anyone else."

"No Peter! It's not like that. I..." Arthur paused, "I do care about you." Hearing a loud gag, he turned quickly to see Francis locked in Mattie's grip struggling for air. He froze in fear, completely forgetting about Peter standing right near him ready to hurt him.

"See! You don't care!" Peter shouted. He brought the flat of his sword down upon Arthur's head. Arthur was only able to mutter in pain or surprise and fell to the ground in an unconscious, crumpled heap.

_Lithuania's POV_

"Do you see him?" Toris asked glancing around. Right away Peter and Matthew found their prey and were already battling. Himself, Feliks and the other two Baltic's were looking around for their enemy.

"Like, I don't know." Feliks said. Toris turned to Feliks. He took his hand and pecked his lips.

"How about you go find Germany and leave us to Russia?" Toris asked.

Feliks scoffed, "But I came here to help you get revenge, like totally!"

"I know but this is for us to take care of privately." Toris said. Feliks frowned earning a chuckle from Toris and a peck on the cheek.

"I'll make it up to you tonight." Toris promised. Feliks smirked. He pecked Toris on the lips.

"All right. You better, like, keep your word!" Feliks said. The Polish man turned and hurried to find Germany.

Toris faced his fellow Baltic's. "Lets do this." he smirked. They hurried around the cabin but didn't see Ivan. The climbed the stairs, drawing their swords knowing what was to come. As they traveled down the hallway they walked soundlessly and peaked into rooms. On a room near the edge of the hallway. Their anticipations rose as they neared the last door.

Their hatred had built up over years of mental and physical abuse. The days that they weren't beaten were days that they lived in constant fear of being beaten.

Then their tourniquet came to save them. Feliciano had contacted them about joining his side in destroying the others. Their incentive: personal revenge and a chance to destroy Ivan Braginski, the cause of all their pain.

They slowly entered the room. Sitting on the bed staring at them with that sweet smile that always made the Baltic's shudder was Ivan.

"I've been waiting for you three." Ivan smiled.

The three of them smirked, their confidence rising being with each other being so close to their goal.

"You've been waiting, but you're not ready." Toris smirked, waving his sword.

"I am always ready, Pupsik." Ivan smiled sweetly. The massive man stood up and reminded the three smaller men of how big he really was. It didn't faze them though. Feliciano had worked with them and trained them hard. The lithe Italian had boosted their confidence and taught them that size doesn't matter.

"Enough chatter." Ravias said bitterly.

"Just tell me, what is it that you want from this?" Ivan asked curiously.

"Revenge." Eduard spat.

"Justice!" Toris exclaimed.

"Victory!" Ravias shouted.

"Victory? Victory in what? What do you hope to gain besides a feeling?" Ivan asked.

"You wouldn't understand. We get more than just a feeling. We are standing up for all of our past abuse!" Toris exclaimed.

The three Baltic's charged at Ivan. Ivan swiftly pulled his swords out to block. Just before they reached him, Ravias and Eduard split into two directions, effectively distracting Ivan.

The Baltic's had decided that they wouldn't be merciful. They wanted to make him pay for all the pain he caused them. While Ivan was distracted by their sudden change, Toris was able to cut Ivan's chest.

Ravias and Eduard landed beside Ivan. While Ivan was trying to gather what was going on, the cut Ivan's sides with the blade.

Ivan doubled over slightly. He turned his sword sharply trying to cut just one of the Baltic's but they were too swift for him.

They flashed around him like three tornadoes, cutting flesh and lightly impaling him. They wanted to make him suffer, draw out the pain and make it a slow, gruesome death.

Toris let out a cold laugh as Ivan sank down to one knee. Cuts littered his battered body, blood mingling with sweat. He couldn't put up much of a fight now but he didn't stop trying.

The other Baltic's began to chortle in pleasure. A smirk painted all of their faces. They longed to see more of his blood. They wanted to rip him open and see his insides.

"Y-you cannot kill me." Ivan choked out, spitting out blood. He looked up at them; amethyst eyes dangerous but for once, it didn't frighten the Baltic's.

"Do not worry; we can and will kill you." Toris snarled. He slashed at Ivan's back, now partially exposed. The other two swung at him, cutting deeper. While they were enjoying their revenge, they knew their allies were probably almost done and that they'd have to leave soon.

They wanted too see Ivan's last breath before they left.

Ivan's snarled, "Do not forget, _dorogoy_, I will come back and I will make you all become one."

The Baltic's just snorted and slashed him with more force than the others. Skin parted to their blade and blood ran from the wound. Ivan, who had been doing such a good job hiding his pain, writhed in pain. His hands and feet twitched lightly.

The Baltic's regrouped and stood over their oppressor and watched his twitching body, blood seeping out of him. Each one of their faces was plastered with a smirk.

A gurgling noise sounded from Ivan's throat. He gagged for a short time, sucking in air trying to breathe. He looked up above him, his eyes glazing over in a haze and his body freezing in time. A trickle of blood that had been previously been blocking his airways, spilled over his lips.

The Baltic's looked at his still body satisfied. A tremendous weight had been lifted from their shoulders. The chains, pinning them to their torture, had been lifted from their shoulders. They felt as though they could do anything, invincible.

After a while, Toris was the first to speak, "Let's head downstairs. I'm willing to bet that the others are done."

The others nodded and turned their backs to the dead body, not even feeling any remorse or looking back as they walked back to the others.

_Spain's POV_

Relief filled Antonio to see Romano safe and unharmed as he burst into the cabin. Antonio smiled happily and opened his mouth to call a greeting until he noticed something.

The others behind them didn't look at all familiar, save for Romano and the blond with the long curl. They quickly forced their way into the house and some drew weapons. Antonio froze as shock filled him.

Then the worst thing happened, again. Romano hurried to him, baring a sword. With lightning reflexes, Antonio drew out his sword. As his sword locked with Romano's he noticed the look in the Italians eyes again. He realized it was all an act. He relaxed slightly. He just had to pretend to get beaten; Romano wouldn't ever really hurt him.

"Toni, Feliciano's still at the same hideout." Romano whispered rapidly. He spun around quickly with an elegant grace, swinging his sword in a wide arch. Again, Spain easily blocked it.

"Feli has roles for you all. He won't kill anyone until he's finished with them." Romano quickly whispered so low that Antonio had to strain his ears. Antonio quickly tried to make a slash at Romano; making sure had given the Italian a subtle hint.

"He has everything planned. All you need to do is break away from the plan or get stronger and you win." Romano quickly said. "He's way too overconfident. Listen, I'm still on your side and I got to kill you so just fake it, ok?"

Before Antonio could even reply or barely even think, Romano rammed his foot into Antonio's stomach, knocking him to the ground. In a flash, Romano kicked Antonio's weapon away and was straddling him. He pins the Spaniards arms above Antonio's head with his elbow.

Antonio would never have expected what was to come next. Romano crashed his lips down onto Antonio's. By instinct, Antonio kissed back. Something about the Italian felt right even though everything about them was supposedly wrong. Antonio relaxed very quickly.

That is, until Romano pinched his nose. The kiss, which in reality had only lasted a fraction of a second, had turned into something completely different. Antonio couldn't breathe.

He tried moving his arms to get him off as panic took over but Romano kept his hands stuck. Antonio thrashed his legs around as his lungs screamed for air.

He jerked around trying to free himself. He looked up with wide eyes at Romano who gave him a sad look before hardening his eyes. Unconsciousness began to close over his vision and his struggles weakened. Just before Spain blacked out, he was almost positive that he heard Romano softly whisper to him, "Lo siento, Spain. Te amo."

**A/N:** Yay! Ok, now the real action starts! Sorry but something in this chapter lacked but I really wanted to get it up so just deal with it. Next chapter will be better, I promise. Please review! I love and read every single review and favorite and watch or whatever. XD I think I had way too much fun writing the Baltic's part. Gosh it was so satisfying! Oh! Guess what? I've had a Monster daily for six days in a row. Why am I posting this? Cause it means that I get happy and that means I get sadistic and carried away with things. Have a happy Holiday now that I cheered you all up! Please review!


	23. Chapter 23

**Lost. Chapter 23**

**A/N:** Hey guys! Surprisingly, not much to say! That's a first right? Haha. It still seems empty without an authors note sooo... Yeah.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the song used below.

_Yeah!  
><em>

_And if your heart stops beating  
>I'll be here wondering<br>Did you get what you deserve?  
>The ending of your life<br>And if you get to heaven  
>I'll be here waiting, babe<br>Did you get what you deserve?  
>The end, and if your life won't wait<br>Then your heart can't take this  
><em>

_Have you heard the news that you're dead?  
>No one ever had much nice to say<br>I think they never liked you anyway  
>Oh take me from the hospital bed<br>Wouldn't it be grand? It ain't exactly what you planned.  
>And wouldn't it be great If we were dead?<br>Ohh dead.  
><em>

_Tongue-tied and oh so squeamish  
>You never fell in love<br>Did you get what you deserve?  
>The ending of your life<br>And if you* get to heaven  
>I'll be here waiting, babe<br>Did you get what you deserve?  
>The end, and if your life won't wait<br>Then your heart can't take this  
><em>

_Have you heard the news that you're dead?  
>No one ever had much nice to say<br>I think they never liked you anyway  
>Oh take me from the hospital bed<br>Wouldn't it be grand to take a pistol by the hand?  
>And wouldn't it be great if we were dead?<br>_

_And in my honest observation  
>During this operation<br>Found a complication in your heart  
>So long, 'Cause now you've got (now you've got)<br>Maybe just two weeks to live  
>Is that the most the both of you can give?<br>_

_One, two, one two three four!  
><em>

_LA LA LA LA LA!  
>LA LA LA LA LA LA!<br>LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!  
>Well come on,<br>LA LA LA LA LA!  
>LA LA LA LA LA LA!<br>LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!  
>Oh motherfucker,<br>_

_If life ain't just a joke (LA LA LA LA LA!)  
>Then why are we laughing? (LA LA LA LA LA LA!)<br>If life ain't just a joke (LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!)  
>Then why are we laughing?<br>If life ain't just a joke (LA LA LA LA LA!)  
>Then why are we laughing? (LA LA LA LA LA LA!)<br>If life ain't just a joke (LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!)  
>Then why am I dead?<br>DEAD!  
><em>

Lyrics to Dead by My Chemical Romance

_England's POV._

Darkness; crushing, suffocating. A thick veil of fog smoothers the mind. All senses are gone, the brain muddled. Arthur found himself in his own mind, away from real life.

In his perfect world, Alfred was there. The American's large hands were secure around Arthur's waist, pulling him close to his muscular (that many people mistook for fat) side. His booming laugh reverberated in the empty space and his bright grin pulsed with confidence and happiness.

Arthur didn't hold back his smile. He was too happy to have Alfred back. He leaned his head on Alfred's shoulder. Alfred just laughed again and wrapped his arms around him. Arthur loved to have his boy beside him once again but something felt different. Something wasn't complete.

Suddenly the surroundings morphed. Instead, it was Francis beside him. His hand rested gently on Arthur's shoulder, gently pulling Arthur towards him. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Arthur's forehead.

"I love you, amor." he whispered, his voice thick in his French accent. Arthur shivered at his touch and leaned into him. It shamed him to say so but his heart truly felt full. There was just something about the Frenchman that made Arthur feel whole.

It was the same thing he felt for Alfred but just a little stronger. Arthur could feel electricity boarding through his veins at Francis' simple touch. He would never admit it to the Frenchman but he needed him with him.

The haze separating himself from consciousness was starting to slowly ebb away. Like waking up from a dream, Arthur blinked his eyes open. A groan escaped his lips and a sharp pain felt like it was splitting the top of his head.

As his eyes focused, he began to make out the texture on the ceiling as well as a blurry figure. He began to make out the color of blond hair and blue eyes.

"Arthur?" the Germans voice exclaimed. He gently slapped Arthur's face a few times, chasing away the last bit of shadows dancing in the corners of his vision. Arthur blinked up at him questioningly.

"Hmmm," he groaned, "What happened?"

Arthur propped himself up on his elbows. Ludwig's arm slid behind his back to help him sit up. Arthur softly rubbed his head, feeling a lump. His voice was a bit hoarse but that was to be expected.

"We were attacked." Ludwig informed him. He quickly scanned his meticulous eyes over Arthur, checking for an injury.

"And we're still alive?" Arthur asked surprised. He looked around, memories slowly starting to come back to his mind. He could remember being with Francis and the door bursting open but then a fog clouded his vision and he couldn't remember anything else.

"Ja, I don't think Feliciano wants us dead just yet." Ludwig said, trying to keep his voice void of emotion.

"Where's Francis?" Arthur asked noticing the blond wasn't in the room. He glanced at the Germans pale face. Fear quickly sank in his stomach seeing the Germans expression.

"Ludwig?" Arthur asked. When Ludwig didn't answer Arthur quickly sat up further.

"Where's Francis?" he yelled. Ludwig sat up, taking Arthur arms in hopes of calming the British man down.

"Calm down, Arthur." Ludwig said in a warning tone. The memories suddenly slammed on Arthur. He remembered fighting Peter and glancing over to see Mattie choking Francis. Raw sobs ripped past his throat.

"Francis!" he cried curling in on himself. Ludwig looked awkward but tried to comfort the panicking man. He rubbed Arthur's arm, his motions stiff.

"Calm down, Arthur. It's ok." Ludwig said. Something snapped within Arthur and his sadness turned to anger. He suddenly turned on Ludwig, screaming in rage.

"Don't tell me everything's alright when it not! Everyone is gone now!" Arthur screamed. His limbs were flung everywhere, smacking Ludwig. The large German tried to get a hold of him and calm him down.

Arthur's foot connected with Ludwig's ribs. The German winced and instinctively sucked in air only to feel a sharp pain in his chest again. His wounds had healed for the most part but they were still sore. The British mans flailing was only making them open up or become agitated.

Before either could comprehend, a blue and white blur tackled Arthur. The figured pioned Arthur to the floor and leaned close to his face.

"Calm down! Arthur!" Gilbert yelled. Arthur's angry screams calmed to mournful sobs. Arthur's body relaxed until he was just a puddle under the Prussian's hard grasp. Gilbert's angry expression changed to sympathy.

"Shh. Calm down, Arthur." Gilbert said, his grip softening, "Francis isn't dead; you can still save him."

Arthur didn't appear to hear him, still lost in grief, "Was I really such a horrible guardian?" he asked quietly.

"Vas?" Gilbert asked confused.

"E-everyone left me. Was I really that unfair or cruel?" Arthur asked so softly that Gilbert almost didn't hear him.

Gilbert looked very awkward, "Uh...you were pretty bad but you weren't _that _bad. They must be pretty weak to want to leave you." Gilbert said. He sat up off of Arthur and rubbed the back of his neck.

Arthur covered his face with his hands, his back hunched over. Silent sobs escaped his lips.

"Uh...Gilbert?" Ludwig said softly.

"Oh, hey bruder? You awesome?" Gilbert asked, just acknowledging Ludwig for the first time even though Ludwig was the reason he went over to help. He wasn't going to let Arthur hurt his bruder because he couldn't control himself.

"Ja. Awesome. I don't think your helping him." Ludwig said quietly. His eyes motioned to Arthurs pitiful figure.

"Vas? Nein, I'm awesome. I can cheer anyone up." Gilbert said, flashing a grin. He glanced over at the crying Brit. Some of his confidence lowered seeing how destroyed he looked.

"Ok. You take over." Gilbert admitted.

Ludwig sat down in front of the Brit, "Arthur, you need to get up. Francis still needs you; you have to be strong." Ludwig whispered.

Emerald green met cyan eyes. Ludwig had never seen the British man look so broken or lonely. "I can't help him." He whispered back, his voice broken.

"Yes, you can." Ludwig stated firmly. "Francis needs you. He helped you so much and now he needs your help. The least you can do is try."

Arthur looked down at his feet and nodded. Guilt flashed through him at he almost gave up on finding the person he claimed to love, or at least claimed to himself. "Alright. I'll try."

"Good." Ludwig smiled. He awkwardly patted Arthur's shoulder. A horrified scream split the air, startling the three men.

"That sounds like Yao!" Gilbert exclaimed. Arthur jumped to his feet, eyes wide.

"I thought everyone left!" Ludwig shouted, looking around skeptically for any other intruders. Gilbert helped Ludwig to his feet.

"Maybe not! Come on!" Gilbert held tight to the handle of his sword and raced up the stairs. Arthur was close behind him and Ludwig followed more slowly.

Arthur's heart thumped against his chest nervously. He hoped it was Mattie still in the house. He wanted to get Francis back as soon as possible. Gilbert went into the room first. Before Arthur even got into the room, he knew something horrible had happened. He smelled the odor of metallic blood and heard the sound of loud sobs.

When Arthur came into the room the first thing he saw was blood and Yao hunched over something that Arthur couldn't see- Gilbert was blocking it.

Fear gripped Arthur again. Someone was dead. No one could survive the loss of all that blood. He slowly stepped closer, letting his feet carry him to the person as if in a dream.

He peered over Gilberts shoulder and was barely able to hold back the vile in his throat. Lying on the ground was the body Ivan, hacked up. His entire body was coated in blood with wounds almost everywhere. There were few deep wounds however; whoever had killed him had wanted it to be slow.

His creepy sweet smile was stuck on his lips; his blind amethyst eyes stared up unseeingly at the ceiling. It was a gruesome sight and definitely a painful way to go. Arthur was so surprised- and horrified -to see Ivan's body. He couldn't imagine anyone killing the massive Russian even though so many people would want him dead.

Arthur glanced over at Yao. The Chinese mans face was red and streaked with salty tears. His grief filled sobs and screams reverberated around the room and yet no one comforted, too afraid to get near the body.

Knowing how the Chinese nation felt, Arthur walked over to the man. He let a hand rest on his shoulder comfortingly, more at ease than Gilbert or Ludwig had done to him.

"Yao," he said gently, "Come on. He wouldn't want you to be sad like this."

Yao didn't appear to hear him. Sobs continued to wrack the small Chinese mans form. Arthur gently brushed his dark hair.

"Shh. I'm so sorry. I know it hurts." Arthur said gently. Yao let out a loud wail and threw himself into Arthur, wrapping his arm around him tightly. Arthur was surprised at first. He blushed and gently hugged him, continuing to brush his hair.

It was odd behavior for the Chinese man but when nothing seemed right and when the most important person to him was brutally murdered he wanted the comfort of another person and would take anyone he could get.

"Shh." Arthur whispered. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ludwig, Kiku and Mei come in. Kiku and Mei hurried over to support their brother. Arthur stepped away from Yao to let them in. He glanced over at Ludwig who was talking with a Gilbert. Surprisingly, Gilbert wasn't grinning or looking remotely happy as Arthur had expected. His face was uncharacteristically serious, maybe even morose

As Arthur neared them, he picked up on their conversation, "No Ludwig, I am fine!" Gilbert insisted.

"I thought you would be happy about this but you look almost sad. I know you used to go out with him so please tell me what's wrong!" Ludwig said. Arthur took off his bomber jacket and then his uniform jacket. He quickly put the bomber jacket back on, unwilling to give it away or get it dirtier, and covered the Russians bloody body with his other jacket. He looked down at the man who had seen so much hardship and history. He wondered what would happen to the vast expanse of land now that its representation is dead.

"I'm sorry, Ivan." he whispered.

"Ludwig. I'm. Fine." Gilbert loudly pronounced each word as a sentence, pinching the bridge of his nose, "I'm sure you know why I'm upset. I don't care if Feliciano did it personally or not; his allies killed Ivan!" Gilbert exclaimed.

Ludwig grimaced, "I know Bruder." he stated, "I'm worried about Feliciano too. He is worse than we thought. Alfred might have been just an accident but now he intentionally killed someone."

Gilbert frowned and put his hands on Ludwig's shoulder. "Just relax for now. We'll do what we have to, just like always." Gilbert flashed him a huge grin and ruffled Ludwig's blond hair. Arthur chuckled but frowned sadly, remembering how he used to do that with Alfred when he was younger.

"Gilbert!" Elizabetha called from downstairs, her voice urgent.

Gilbert turned his head to face the door. "Ja?" he called back. There were quick footsteps coming up the stairs before Hungary burst into the room. She came to a sudden stop, her eyes coming to rest on Ivan's body. She gasped and covered her mouth with her hands at the sight of the bloody Russian. Gilbert was up in a second, blocking the view from her.

"Shh. Its ok, Liz. What's the matter?" he asked sensitively.

Elizabetha swallowed, "R-Romano tried to kill Antonio." she told him. Gilbert went ridged and his scarlet eyes widened in fear. "He's still alive though. He says he needs to tell you something."

Gilbert relaxed visibly. "Alright. Where's he at?" he asked.

"Down stairs with Roderick. Just call his name. Oh and he said Arthur should come too." Elizabetha said. Arthur glanced up at her and then at Gilbert. The albino motioned him to follow him. The two hurried down the stairs.

"Yo Specs? Toni?" Gilbert called, scanning rooms as they walked past..

"In here." Roderick answered.

Gilbert and Arthur hurried to Roderick. The aristocrat had an arm behind Antonio, helping him sit up. He didn't appear to be hurt. Something had happened though for the Spaniards face was beat red and his entire body was trembling.

"Toni?" Gilbert rushed over to his long time friend, pushing Roderick aside. The Austrian rolled his eyes at the Prussian and joined Arthur.

"Antonio has something important you two need to know." Roderick stated calmly. It was as if nothing horrible had just happened.

"Ok. They might need your help upstairs," Arthur said. He wanted so bad to wipe that calm look off of Roderick's face, "Ivan was killed."

Roderick's eyes bugged out for a second until he smoothed out his features. Arthur secretly smirked in hi head. He wouldn't be so calm after he saw the condition of Ivan's mutilated body.

Roderick just nodded his head and walked away, posture erect. Arthur wanted to run over and punch him just to get a reaction but held himself back he had to find out what Antonio had to say to him.

Arthur joined Gilbert and Antonio, who had calmed down. He looked over at his long time enemy and couldn't help but feel slightly happy even though he knew it was wrong.

"Hey Antonio. Are you ok?" Arthur asked kneeling down so they were eye level.

"F-fine." Antonio said, his voice shaky.

"What happened?" Gilbert asked.

Antonio swallowed and tried to smother the fear in his eyes, "L-Lovi had led the raid. He came over and fought me. He secretly told me that he is spying for us and that they were still at the same base that they were in when we went to attack them. He says Feliciano is overly self confident and says we can use that to our advantage."

"Ok. What does this have to do with the two of us?" Arthur asked. He turned the information in his head a few times, wondering if he could figure out how he could use it to help Francis.

"He said that Feliciano has a huge plan. Everyone has a part to play and that he won't kill any of them on his own until their purpose is fulfilled. He said it was my turn to die but he wasn't going to kill me. Instead, to make it look like he did and that he was loyal to Feliciano, he forced me to the ground and tried to s-suffocate me. Before I passed out, I saw Mattie leave with Francis."

Arthur stiffened. "What did he do to Francis?" he asked quickly. He noticed Gilbert stiffen as well and he remembered that Gilbert, Antonio and Francis were part of the Bad Touch Trio, or Bad Friends Trio.

"He only knocked him out. Now listen, you still have time. Francis' part isn't finished yet. Feliciano has a specific role for him to. Romano didn't tell me and I'm not sure if he knows but that is all that he told me. We need to hurry and get Francis back before Feliciano decides his job is done." Antonio said quickly. Arthur quickly lept to his feet.

"Let's go now!" he exclaimed quickly. It was in those rare moments when he was raring to go that he felt Alfred's spirit beside him.

"We can't do that now, amigo." Antonio stated.

"Why not?" Arthur glared at the Spaniard. He wasn't in the mood to let the Spaniard boss him around and keep him from Francis.

"Because that's what they're expecting us to do. We have to try to think outside of Feliciano's plans. What wouldn't he expect us to do?" Gilbert interjected.

"I go it. I will go pretend to join Feliciano's side and make sure he is not killed. You guys can go escape to America. He would never expect you to go there." Antonio exclaimed grinning.

"No!" Arthur spat quickly.

"Amigo, I get you don't want to go to America but we have to do what we can to stay alive." Antonio said gently.

"Well...what about Francis? What if he gets out and he doesn't know where we are?" Arthur asked.

"Then I'll tell him where you are and he'll go find you." Antonio said thinking. He looked at the British man, smiling that he figured out a plan to get his Lovi back.

"Ok well...how will we get out of here?" Arthur asked.

"If we can just acquire a plane, I can fly us out of here." Gilbert suggested grinning proudly.

"Ok. Where are you going to get this plane, Amelia Airheart?" Arthur asked, his voice dripping in sarcasm.

"I have connections in Italy." Gilbert grinned. Arthur and Antonio just stared at him but agreed none the less

Arthur sighed, "Fine. I guess that's an ok idea." he groaned. Antonio rested a hand on his shoulder.

"I know it hurts now but the pain will get easier." Antonio said sympathetically.

"It never fully goes away does it?" Arthur asked quietly, his eyes hard.

Antonio squeezed his shoulder. "No but we always have memories and pictures to remind us of Alfred." he said. Arthur blinked away fresh tears, not wanting to show weakness in front of his old enemy.

"Thanks." he said quietly, wanting to get away quickly.

"De nada." Antonio smiled.

Gilbert clapped his hands together and rubbed them with a devious grin, melting the sadness with its warmth.

"Ok. I'll go tell everyone we're going to leave. We should probably bury Ivan here before we leave." Gilbert said. Antonio and Arthur just nodded.

"Si, señor." Antonio said. Gilbert got up and hurried upstairs. Antonio looks back to Arthur. A warm breeze blew in from the window, carrying the scent of violets through the house.

"Things will get better, Arthur." Antonio said sympathetically. He turned to look at Arthur, his curly chocolate hair blowing gently away from his gentle eyes. "You can only go up once you've hit rock bottom"

Arthur chuckled cruely, "What is rock bottom though? It can't be much further from this."

**  
>A:N:<strong> Sorry for lateness and shortness. I'm so far behind! Please review. Thankies and I love youuu! 


	24. Chapter 24

**Lost. Chapter 24.**

**A/N:** Hey guys! Sorry about not posting in a while. Had a 600 point project to do that took me nearly two months to complete. I got really far behind in my writing and I only had chapter 23 prewritten and I like to be three chapters ahead of time so I can make sure there are no gaps. Plus it helps me edit better since I'm my own beta. ^_^ So if it sucks it's my fault. I'm much too impatient for a beta. Wow. That sounded pretty nerdy, eh? Lol.

_Sparkling angel I believed  
>You are my savior in my time of need<br>Blinded by faith, I couldn't hear  
>All the whispers, the warnings so clear.<br>_

_I see the angels, I'll lead them to your door  
>There's no escape now, no mercy no more<br>No remorse 'cause I still remember  
>The smile when you tore me apart.<em>

__

_You took my heart, deceived me right from the start  
>You showed me dreams, I wished they turn into real<br>You broke the promise and made me realize  
>It was all just a lie.<em>

__

_Sparkling angel, I couldn't see  
>Your dark intentions, your feelings for me<br>Fallen angel, tell me why  
>What is the reason, the thorn in your eye?<br>_

_I see the angels, I'll lead them to your door  
>There's no escape now, no mercy no more<br>No remorse 'cause I still remember  
>The smile when you tore me apart.<em>

__

_You took my heart, deceived me right from the start  
>You showed me dreams, I wished they turn into real<br>You broke the promise and made me realize  
>It was all just a lie.<em>

__

_Could have been forever  
>Now we have reached the end.<em>

__

_This world may have failed you  
>It doesn't give you a reason why<br>You could have chosen a different path in life  
>The smile when you tore me apart.<em>

__

_You took my heart, deceived me right from the start  
>You showed me dreams, I wished they turn into real<br>You broke the promise and made me realize  
>It was all just a lie.<em>

__

_Could have been forever  
>Now we have reached the end.<em>

Angels by Within Temptation

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia!

_Prussia's POV_

It took a while to pull Yao off of Ivan's mangled body. Gilbert just observed through much of it all as if he wasn't actually apart of them. It was still a huge shock to him considering how much misery the dead man caused him. Spain's news still ran through his head and he couldn't help but feel uneasy.

Kiku and Mei finally managed to pull Yao off of Ivan. The Chinese man had not stopped sobbing.

"No! Please, don't leave me, aru!" he sobbed over and over, possibly thinking that if he said it enough Ivan would come back to life. It was still a shock to them all that a country could die. Two of their strongest allies had been killed as if they were toothpicks even though Alfred's death had been more heroic.

Gilbert snorted at the irony. Alfred finally became a hero like he always talked about but he wasn't there to see it. Ivan had just merely been a target, an obstacle to their enemy, a play toy. His task, whatever it had been, had been fulfilled and Feliciano allowed the Baltics to kill him, just as he let Romano 'kill' Antonio.

The albino wondered what Francis' purpose was. Mattie hadn't killed him so he must have a bigger purpose. Possibly to torture Arthur more but maybe he had some secret meaning.

Gilbert looked out the window to where the sky was starting to turn orange, and pink near the horizon, "Yo, we need to get moving. It's getting late."

He had to admit he was nervous flying a plane. He had done it plenty of times by himself and was known for doing insane and risky stunts but he was not use to being responsible for others' lives or wellbeing. He was a screw up on many things but his screw ups never affected anyone but himself until now.

Elizabetha must have noticed his unusual behavior for she quietly approached him and put a hand on his shoulder, "You nervous about the plane?" she asked quietly, her voice uncharacteristically soft.

Gilbert sighed. "Ja. It's so not awesome." he admitted.

Elizabetha's mouth curved with amusement, "Don't be worried. I've seen you fly a plane and your one bad ass pilot. Trust me, you'll be just fine."

"Liz, I've never had to deal with being responsible for other passengers in a plane. If I mess up and you or West or anyone else gets hurt because of it..." Gilbert let his sentence hang.

Elizabetha's soft lips pressed against his for a brief second. "It's not awesome for you to stress out about something so mature like this. I want you to be immature like you usually are."

"Liz, this war has changed all of us. I can't act stupid like I use to." Gilbert spoke in a low voice. Elizabetha brushed some of his dirty white hair.

"I know, Gil," she sighed, "But we can't let this control us. We have to take charge or else we'll be at their mercy." Elizabetha whispered.

"Liz, we're already at their mercy!" Gilbert said, his voice getting louder. "We're running away from them; waving a white flag and retreating to the hills with our tails between our legs! How can we take control of a situation that we have no hope of grasping?"

"Don't tell me that there is no hope, Gilbert! As long as there is still breath in our chests, there is always hope. Things may seem down now but what goes up always has to come down. Feliciano won't be all high and mighty for long so don't you dare tell me there's no hope." Elizabetha retorted.

Gilberts scarlet eyes flashed with anger. He hated to be challenged in front of other people. "Listen here woman! He might fall someday but how many lives will it cost? Alfred and Ivan are already dead! Francis was kidnapped and the only reason why Antonio is still alive is because Romano is still our ally. So what hope is there if it is inevitable for someone to die or get hurt?" Gilbert yelled, getting closer to her red face.

"What happened to you?" Elizabetha said quietly. She looked at him with disgust. "You used to be the strongest one here. Now you let yourself be reduced to...to a man with no hope; broken and alone."

Gilbert's eye twitched in anger. "Like I said, this war has changed everyone. Maybe I've changed too much for us to be together." he spat, his voice cold and emotionless.

"Maybe we've both changed too much." Elizabetha retorted with equal coolness. Gilbert stuck his nose in the air defiantly.

"Fine then." he grumbled. Turning sharply on his heels, he stomped out of the now quiet room, not even noticing how everyone was watching him.

Ludwig quickly followed after his brother. His leg had healed quickly and he now could walk without help though he did have a slight limp. He cursed under his breath at the ever growing gap between him and his brother. He called out to him, a sudden fear that he would lose him settling over him though he knew it was foolish.

Hearing Ludwig call his name, Gilbert turned around, a grin fixed on his features. "Hey West! What's up?" he asked as if nothing had happen. Ludwig knew that his brother loved Elizabetha and he knew he was stress and worried, both of them emotions he wasn't use to showing to anyone.

"What's going on, East?" Ludwig asked, his mouth creased into a flat line.

"You didn't hear? We're going to America and I'm going to fly the plane." he said. His voice was smooth, or at least as smooth as his rough voice could be.

"I meant back there, Bruder. You don't honestly believe that you and Elizabetha can't stay together, do you?" Ludwig asked.

Gilbert's eye brows furrowed; a sigh escaping his lips. "I believe it, Ludwig. She just can't accept how awesome I am." he said.

"East, she's just worried about you. You aren't acting like you." Ludwig carefully said. He knew he was treading into dangerous territory with his brother now. He felt like he didn't even know him now; he wasn't acting at all like his regular self. Normally, he would have been grinning that silly grin of his and claiming how awesome he was. He seemed like a hollow shell of his normal self.

"This war has changed something in all of us. You know that better than anyone, Ludwig." Gilbert whispered his voice softer. He clamped his hand over Ludwig's shoulder. "If I acted like an idiot and you got hurt because I couldn't stop Feliciano then I would never forgive myself. You're the only one I have Ludwig; I can't lose you. Ever."

"That's not true. You don't realize it but you have Elizabetha. She cares about you." Ludwig sighed, trying to find a way to make his brother understand. "You two are perfect for each other. You're both stubborn and you're both insane, crazy and yet some of the most sincere people I've ever met."

A smile graced Gilbert's features but it was gone in a flash, replaced by a look of misery. One that would forever be branded into Ludwig's cornea, "Maybe we're too much the same. No one in their right mind would want to be with me."

His hand dropped off Ludwig's shoulder and fell to his side. He turned away from Ludwig and retreated outside, looking even more miserable than before Ludwig got to him.

Ludwig was about to go after him but stopped. He would just make it worse; Gilbert needed time to cool down and think. Ludwig sighed in defeat and returned back upstairs to help Arthur carry Ivan downstairs.

Gilbert waited by the car as they buried Ivan. He could hear Yao's grief filled howls as they lowered the Russians body into the ground. His mind was a jumbled mess and more than ever he wanted a beer. He didn't know where any alcohol stores were and he probably shouldn't drink before flying so he decided to go with a Monster. He would need the energy to stay up for the entire flight.

Gilbert turned his back to the group, occasionally feeling eyes burning into the back of his head. He ignored easily, staring off into the mountains and wondering how everything would play out.

As far as he could see it, it was a lose-lose situation. Either they won the war and got rid of Italy which would destroy Ludwig more or Feliciano would succeed. That was very unlikely. All previous attempts of taking over the world were unsuccessful; it was doubtful that it would be successful now.

After what seems like a while, the others returned. Yao's sobs had turned to whimpers. Kiku and Mei walked on both sides of him, each having a hand on his shoulder or hand.

"Come on; I don't want to fly too much in the dark." Gilbert told them in a monotone voice. His heart felt frozen ever since his fight with Elizabetha. He no longer felt certain emotions. He only felt anger or worry and he was certainly both. Elizabetha's eyes were narrowed as she walked past with excessive shake to her hips as if to be snooty.

"Shut up, Gil. Stop always being worried about you for once and see how everyone else is hurting." Elizabetha hissed in an icy tone. Her words, though false, still stung. He kept his face straight; not going to give her the satisfaction of knowing how much her words hurt him. He only snorted and turned away from her, walking to the other car. He could feel her eyes burning into the back of his head, chilling him to the core.

He got behind the wheel of the other car and waited as Ludwig, Arthur and Antonio got in the car. Gilbert sighed. In the past raid, they had lost nine people. It was hard to believe that Mattie would do anything wrong so maybe this war did change everyone.

As soon as everyone was inside the car, Gilbert quickly sped off, burning some rubber as a result of his anger. The brief moment of burnt tire made him feel powerful but then he remembered what position he was in and felt even more depressed. He made sure to stop by the department store for some food, energy drinks and some beer for later. The three of them carried the bags to the car and quickly loaded them into the car.

"Gilbert where are we even going?" Ludwig asked after a long, awkward silence. Everyone else was looking at the beautiful Italian country as the scenery rolled past. Only it didn't seem so beautiful anymore. It only reminded them of the cute little Italian that was trying to kill everyone.

"I'm going to a buddies place. He has big bucks and owns a plane we might be able to use." Gilbert explained, turning to look at his brother. The car started drifting to the other side of the lane.

"GILBERT! Eyes on the road! Eyes on the road!" Ludwig exclaimed. Gilbert sharply turned the wheel, returning the car to its proper lane just in time to avoid getting hit head on by another car. Everyone let out the breath they had been holding and breathed easier.

"Ok, so what if he won't let us use this plane?" Ludwig asked, slightly annoyed at how his brother was never prepared or possessed a backup plan.

"Please, West, we go way back! There ain't no way in hell that he won't let us use it!" Gilbert smirked. Ludwig sighed and leaned his head back up against the cool glass.

"Whatever you say, Bruder, whatever you say."

_(Time skip. Still Gilbert's point of view.)_

Just as Gilbert had predicted, his buddy let him borrow his plane no questions asked. He was not exaggerating in the slightest about having a lot of money. The man owned a huge house, many expensive cars, a huge plot of land, and a few casinos in addition to his planes. How Gilbert came to know a man like that in Italy was strange.

When Gilbert returned to the car after talking, he noticed the second car had parked behind his car. He noticed Elizabetha sitting up near the front beside Roderick and snorted to himself. He knew she would get over him quickly but he didn't expect it to be that quick.

"I'm just too awesome for her." he told himself to lessen the pain in his heart though it didn't change anything. He got back inside his car and sped off to where the planes were kept. The sky was perfect weather for flying albeit the darkness but the sky was clear and the breeze was gently. He parked the car and everyone got out. His group waited as the other car pulled up and everyone got out.

Gilbert helped everyone load into the plane. The plane had just enough room for everyone to be comfortable. He ran over standard procedure before getting in his seat in the control room. Ludwig had decided to sit with him in the front seat area.

"I'll be right back, West." Gilbert told him. He quickly went back to the passenger area where everyone was chatting amongst themself. He called their attention. "We're going to be on a pretty long trip here so sit down, get comfortable. You guys all know the drill so just don't bother me."

"Like we'd want to!" Elizabetha snapped from her seat near the back of the passenger area. Scarlet eyes narrowed angrily as he glared at the Hungarian sitting beside the Austrian. Gilbert didn't want to admit it but seeing them sitting so close together made his heart burn with jealousy.

"Excuse me?" Gilbert asked, more from disbelief than anything. It stung a little that Elizabetha would say something to him like that in front of everyone else.

"You heard me jack-ass!" Elizabetha snapped. She glared at Gilbert challengingly and folded her arms over her chest with a look of defiance.

"Oh? Well aren't you a good friend?" Gilbert retorted. He could almost feel the tension suffocating the air.

"What goes around comes around!" Elizabetha snapped back. Gilbert rolled his eyes and let out a loud sigh.

"Oh my god; what the hell did I even do?" he asked, throwing his hands into the air dramatically.

"I don't have to tell you, you selfish bastard!" Elizabetha turned her head away, tipping her nose in the air. Gilbert snorted.

"Sure, I'm the selfish bastard!" he said sarcastically. "You're the one who is cheating on me!"

He hadn't meant to say it; he didn't even know he had been thinking it until the words flew out of his mouth before he could catch them. He recoiled only slightly but didn't back down.

"What? I'm not cheating on you!" Elizabetha snapped, her eyes boring into his and a flame with anger. It was a look that Prussia used to love about her. No girl he had ever known had possessed the fire and defiance that Elizabetha had. Now it only caused him to get hot with anger.

"Then how come you've been so buddy- buddy with four-eyes? I'm not dumb, Liz; I can see." Gilbert snapped.

"No you can't, Gilbert. There's nothing going in between us! You think you can see what's going on? Well you can't! Your blind, Gilbert, to everything!" Elizabetha yelled. What was followed was not another retort. Instead, there was only silence. No one dared to breath or break the silent. All eyes were trained on Gilbert's whose jaw had dropped with shock. When he finally gathered his wits, he just shook his head as he turned around.

"Let's just hope I don't crash the plane then." Gilbert said uncharacteristically quiet as he walked away. He fell into his seat heavily with an exasperated sigh.

"Bruder?" Ludwig asked in a concerned voice. Gilbert smirked and looked up.

"Yeah West?" he asked, grinning over at him in a mask of fake confidence.

"I heard," Ludwig told him silently, "I'm sorry."

"Hey; it's fine. I'm awesome and she's the one being an ass!" Gilbert smirked, chuckling at his own comment.

"East..."

"Not now West. I gotta get this baby in the air." Gilbert grinned. He reached in his bag and pulled out a Monster. He cracked it open, drinking in the intoxicating fumes before taking a chug. He set it back down and started the plane.

About an hour later, Gilbert had downed three monsters and was practically dancing in his seat.

"Bruder, just go to the bathroom already. I'll take over for you." Ludwig sighed impatiently. Gilbert reluctantly agreed and let Ludwig have control of the plane. He got up and started unzipping his pants even before he got into the bathroom.

He returned shortly, feeling much relieved. "Ahhh! That feels so good. Those damn things go right through me!" Gilbert returned to his spot, adjusting himself and got comfortable.

A switch flashed red, the light casting shadows across the two brother's faces. Both looked at it confused.

"Hey West, can you go back and check on everyone?" Gilbert asked, moving around and checking other buttons and switches. Ludwig nodded silently, getting up from his seat. "Be careful." Gilbert said to him as his brother went to the back of the plane.

Now in complete silence, Gilbert listened carefully with acute hearing. The red light cast more eerie shadows across the control area, only adding to the serious atmosphere. Ever so faintly, Gilbert could hear a slight noise as if something was near the plane. It grew in volume until Gilbert realized with anguish that it was another plane.

In a fury, he flipped on his speaker and adjusted more switches and buttons as he spoke into the headset, "Everyone get in your seats and fasten your seat belts. Get ready for a bumpy ride."

The Prussia skillfully kept a look out through the dark sky. The plane was pretty good so it probably wouldn't be able to move as fast as a smaller plane like the ones he used to fly so he would be at a disadvantage.

A deafening silence filled his ears. He scarcely dared to breathe; not wanting to taint the silence with any noise. He could hear the usual noises of a plane as well as a faint hiss or whistle, steadily growing louder. There was a flashing on a monitor just before he saw the very faint shape of something speeding towards the front of the plane.

Giving a hard yank, Gilbert sharply turned the point of the plane down. The plane jolted from the sudden and sharp movement but remained in air. Gilbert held his breath, his heart thumping wildly in his chest.

This couldn't be happening! He wouldn't be as worried if it had been just him in a small fighter plane but he was in control of a bigger plane with all of his friends in it. If anything happened to them, he would never be able to forgive himself. Each of their lives added a weight to his shoulders, forcing him to assume his sole role of pilot.

There was a loud noise near the top of the plane as well as the noise from the flashing lights. Gilbert struggled to control the plane and judging by the controls, something had ripped off one of the top panels of the plane. He realized with dread that the plane was going down when the altitude meter started shrinking at an alarming rate. He tried to keep the nose of the plane up to slow their fall as he switched on his headset.

"The plane is going down! Stay calm and hold on to something but be prepared to leave as soon as you can!" Gilbert shouted into his speaker above all the noise of the controls and the air ripping past the plane.

He heard shouts of alarm from the back where all the others were. Gilbert shuttered, the sound being branded into the back of his mind. He didn't want to be responsible for any of their deaths. Their faces flashed before his eyes; Ludwig, Elizabetha, Roderick, Arthur, Yao, Kiku, and Mei.

His hands were pure white from gripping the control. The altitude level declined quickly but time seemed to slow by. Every foot seemed like a million life times; every inch a minute. He could hear his own panicked breathing reverberating through his skull.

He had told everyone not to panic while he had so easily let himself be gripped by fear. He tried his best to keep the plane up so that maybe everyone on the plane would be able to watch the sun rise. Closer and closer the plane approached the dark torrent of ocean water, miles and miles deep. He didn't want to think about how deep that was and that maybe they'd become the next Titanic. Gilbert sent a quick prayer up to God, begging him to listen and to carry them to safety.

The plane slammed to a stop as it hit the water.

**A/N:** Yuss! This chapter was really fun to write! If you haven't had a Monster yet, you need to. The bluish purple one is the best. They're the best tasting drink you'll ever had not to mention how it makes you happy (even though you get really depressed after it wears off). I'm going on about it; sorry. DX. Still on a Monster high from after school today. I've been waiting for this chapter as well. I'm starting to think this might now be anywhere from 50-60 chapters long. If that's the case it's not even half over and I think I've been working on it for six months now. Or at least planning it. Thank you for all the reviews. I never would have expected them all. You guys are really awesome. Please keep sending them in! I read every one at least twice! Please please please, give me a suggestion on my writing. The more I read my writing and read others the more pissed I get that mine isn't better. Any suggestion will be loved! Lol. XD Thanks and love ya all!


	25. Chapter 25

**Lost. Ch. 25**

**A/N:** Splitting the last chapter in two since it was so long. It would have been about 6,000 words! On a random note since the authors note was so small, I bought Uninstall off of iTunes. Probably not the one you were thinking. It's by Tetola93. It's the same song but it has more guitar and lots of screaming so it's more my style and then some random Japanese at the end.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia.

_Racing faster,  
>Escape disaster,<br>Partners in crime will leave their mark  
>We make our own way,<br>No thoughts of yesterday,  
>Black hearts of chrome and battle scars (chrome and battle scars)<br>Oh.  
><em>

_The legacy,  
>Born from a dream,<br>On leather wings,  
>Rose from the streets,<br>With the hands on destiny,  
><em>

_We came from nothing,  
>But promise one thing,<br>We'll change the world with these guitars,  
>So listen closely,<br>And don't stop working,  
>No one can tell you who you are (tell you who you are)<br>Oh,  
><em>

_The legacy,  
>Born from a dream,<br>On leather wings,  
>Rose from the streets,<br>With the hands on destiny,  
>The legacy,<br>Born from a dream,  
>On leather wings,<br>Rose from the streets,  
>With the hands on destiny,<br>_

_Argh  
>Run<br>(Run)  
>Run<br>Never look back!  
>Run<br>(Run)  
>Run<br>Never look back!  
>Run<br>Run  
>Run<br>Never look back!  
>Run!<br>_

_The legacy,  
>Born from a dream,<br>On leather wings,  
>Rose from the streets,<br>With the hands on destiny,  
>The legacy,<br>Born from a dream,  
>On leather wings,<br>Rose from the streets,  
>With the hands on destiny,<em>

The Legacy by Black Veil Brides

Glass shattered. Metal bent in on itself. The plane was enveloped into the darkness of the night as the electricity drowned out. Fire sparked from the control area, slowly spreading to areas where water had not yet swallowed.

The water slowly drags the plane down into the depths. The dark torrents slowly inched their way closer; relatively slow at first and then faster at an alarming rate.

The passengers in the plane quickly leapt up from their seat and started scrambling towards the emergency exit; at least all but one. Water was starting to leak into the planes middle, sending panic through the people inside.

Panicked cries filled the quiet night sky. Hands trembled in the dark trying to undo the door but it was in vain. The door had gotten jammed by the force of the crash. No one has received any serious injuries other than a cut or bump.

A blond man near the back glanced towards the front of the plane where he could see an orange glow casting flickering shadows off the walls and water slowly inching in and claiming the plane. His brother had not yet emerged from his seat and he was growing worried quickly.

A hand rested on his shoulder. Ludwig jumped and turned to be inches away from Elizabetha's face. He wasn't used to seeing her looking so terrified or worried. His anger towards her mellowed slightly.

"Ludwig, I'll go get Gilbert. You're the strongest one here; we need you to open the door." Elizabetha cried over the others shouts. Ludwig hesitated for a fraction of a second but agreed. Elizabetha wasted no time by dashing off towards the nose of the plane as Ludwig approached the door.

Elizabetha cautiously stopped inside the control room. Her eyes instantly darted to the large seats positioned in front of the window. Fear gripped every fiber of her body. The only thing she could see out of the window was the steadily rising water level. Flames were licking at the controls and slowly making their way towards the body of the plane. But that wasn't what scared Elizabetha.

She couldn't see Gilbert.

Heart pounding in her chest, she took unsteady steps closer. She wasn't sure if she wanted to see what might have happened to him. Horrible visions painted her mind and all she could think of was that the last conversation they would have shared would have been a fight that resulted in Gilbert admitting that he thought Elizabetha was cheating on him.

She couldn't show how much it hurt to hear him accuse her of loving Roderick the way he had thought. She wished she had told him now. If Gilbert was really dead, Elizabetha would never forgive herself; to let him die believing such nonsense.

The heat from the flames was hot against her face, nearly burning her skin. She couldn't bring herself to move faster though and get out. She wanted to delay what she thought was the inevitable of finding her lovers body. She didn't want to face the reality of that or have to either drag him out or leave him behind to be swallowed by the cold water and have his flesh slowly eaten by the fish in his watery grave.

As she inched closer, Elizabetha could see a sliver of silver hair from her position behind the chair. A sob escaped Elizabetha's voice. She forced herself to get it over with and crossed to the side of the seat. She quickly covered her mouth to hold back her sobs that threatened to wrack her body.

There was Gilbert; lying over the controls with blood seeping from a wound on his forehead. His eyelids were lightly closed giving him a peaceful look; something that didn't fit the loud Prussian nor the desperate and chaotic situation. She let her feet carry her over to his body. She rested a hand against his silver locks. Tears were freely flowing down her cheek. She tenderly let her hand trace his cheek and then his jaw.

Then she noticed something that breathed hope back into her chest.

His chest was rising and falling. He was breathing!

"G-Gilbert!" Elizabetha exclaimed, her voice choked with tears. Her hands wrapped around his shoulders, shaking him desperately, "Wake up!"

Gilbert flopped in her grasp like a fish out of water. Elizabetha moved closer to him, gripping his shoulders and trying to tug him out of the chair. A sickening crack was heard over the crackling and snapping of the flame. Gilbert cried out in pain and Elizabetha realized with horror that one of his legs was crushed under the seat. Scarlet red was slowly staining the area around his knee and his peaceful expression contorted in pain.

Elizabetha stopped, her heart pounding in her chest and tears leaving dirt streaks on her face. "Oh God! Oh God, oh God, oh God!" she whimpered helplessly. She didn't know what to do. She didn't want to hurt him but she only had a limited amount of time before the water slowly creeping towards her and Gilbert or the flames pressing up against her back killed them.

"Gilbert! Wake up!" she begged him once again. She gently patted his pale cheek, fearing she may hurt him if she touched him any harder than that. Desperation was filling her body. The cabin was quickly filling with smoke and heat; making it difficult for her to breathe and scorching her skin.

A sob escaped her dry throat; sounding raw and terrified. She tightly gripped him as she continued to shake his shoulders. She couldn't lose him, she just couldn't. She had to tell him how much she loved him. She had to tell him how much she was sorry for fighting with him over something so stupid. She wanted to spend more time with him; to love him. She wanted to see his fiery red eyes or his devilish smirk or his snow white hair framing flawless pale skin. She wanted to feel his strong arms wrap around her waist or brush her cheek. She wanted to feel his heart beating on her chest as he gently pressed their lips together. She just wanted the man she loved to stay with her.

A quiet, tired moan filled Elizabetha's ears. A gasp escaped her own lips as she looked into the Prussians face. His eye lids flickered softly, his face contorting more in pain. Elizabetha gently cupped his cheek with a tender hand.

"G-Gil? You have to wake up. W-we need to g-go!" Elizabetha desperately called to him. Gilbert moaned again and blinked his eyes open. Glazed over in a way that terrified Elizabetha, Gilbert started back at her. His blank expression morphed to one of confusion then to one of anger.

"W-what the h-hell?" he asked. As soon as he managed to get the words out, he was overcome by a fit of coughing. Elizabetha fearfully rubbed his back, quickly darting around to the flames closing in on them.

At his attempt to move, Gilbert cried out in pain, caught off guard from the strong wave of pain that seized his body in a wave. Elizabetha took his hand as it darted to his leg.

"Don't touch it! The plane crushed your leg when we crashed! We need to get out of here but you're stuck!" Elizabetha cried out.

Gilbert pushed her hands away. What he was to say would break Elizabetha's heart. He looked square into her eyes. Every feature was entirely serious, "Elizabetha; get out of here!" he yelled, pushing her further away.

"W-what?" Elizabetha protested, "N-No! I'm not leaving you here! You'll die!"

Gilbert sighed. Instead of pushing her away, his hand gently covered hers with a tenderness that Elizabetha had never felt from anyone. She knew in that moment that despite what she said and what he said and what they hadn't yet said, he still loved her with all his heart. More tears dripped from her eyes.

"Liz," Gilbert whispered in a soft voice that Elizabetha had never heard him say before and hadn't thought been possible until now, "If you stay, we'll both die. I'm not getting out of this. If you go now, at least one of us will live." Elizabetha opened her both to argue with him but was interrupted by the Prussian, "Please Liz, I would never be able to deal with your blood staining my hands. Please don't make me deal with that."

Elizabetha's head bent into her hands, her shoulders shaking with great, choking sobs. "I can't leave you! Please, Gilbert, we have to at least try!" she cried.

"There isn't much time. Just get out of here and don't look back. I won't suffer, I promise!" Gilbert gently kissed her knuckles, closing his eyes tight. Elizabetha hated to see a man once so full of life so hopeless. He had faced death in the eye many times before; spat in its face and chased it off with his signature laugh. Now he was bending under the pressure and giving into it.

Suddenly an idea struck Elizabetha, "Gil, hold on! I have an idea!" she exclaimed. She let go of his hand and sprinted as fast as her legs would carry her. Her heart nearly burst with joy. Ludwig was helping all the others out of the plane with the help of Roderick. Elizabetha dashed over to them, panting.

"G-Gilbert's t-trapped!" was all she said. Ludwig's eyes widened and he left Roderick to go back with Elizabetha. When they arrived, the air was almost gray with ash and the flames were even closer; too close for comfort.

Gilbert was holding his shirt to his face, trying to breathe through the fabric. He had been in the smoke for a long time and it was difficult for him to breathe.

Ludwig's skilled eyes quickly picked out the problem without anyone having to tell him what the problem was. As Elizabetha rejoined Gilbert, Ludwig went to Gilbert's leg and gripped the metal crushing his knee. The metal was hot to the touch but Ludwig hardly felt it. He was consumed by adrenaline and the burning need to get his brother out of his metal trap. He grunted loudly as he pried up on the metal. The metal groaned in response, slowly moving away from the trapped limb.

Gilbert winced, biting his lip as the pain engulfed him again. His body was stiff in his seat, his hands tightly gripping Elizabetha's hands as if they were a life line. Elizabetha squeezed back, tears pricking her eyes. She hated to see him in such pain. She vigorously prayed to God that he watched over them and helped them all to safety.

There was a loud crunch as Ludwig ripped the metal away from Gilbert's leg. A small gasp of pain escaped Gilbert's ash coated lips.

"L-Ludwig, L-Liz, g-get out! I can d-do this on my o-own!" Gilbert panted, sitting up. He tried to move his leg to the side but stiffened again in pain.

"Ludwig, you go help everyone else out! I'll stay behind and help Gilbert!" Elizabetha ordered. Ludwig knew his help could be used elsewhere and nodded, quickly hurrying back to help Roderick get the last few people out.

Elizabethan gently tugged Gilbert's arm over her shoulder. She could have sworn she heard a sharp intake of breath from him but it was so faint that perhaps her mind was playing tricks on her.

She helped him to his feet. He didn't put any weight on his other leg and leaned heavily against Elizabetha; entirely dependent on her. Elizabetha knew they had very little time left. The fire was scorching hot and her throat was raw and the water level was starting to rise even faster.

Elizabetha took a small step, wanting to test Gilbert's strength first. Her own legs were trembling from fear. A mistake of hers could lead to Gilbert getting hurt or even worse. Her panic sharpened her senses. The crackling of the fire roared in her ear, each drop of water reverberated ominously through her head, the creaking of the plane sent shivers down her back and Gilbert's harsh breathing made her feel even more scared and worried.

Gilbert bit his lip to keep silent but it was clear that it hurt him immensely to walk. Elizabetha angled her shoulder skywards to take some pressure off of his wounded leg. She continued to walk slowly, determined to get him out.

Gilbert struggled to keep up but persevered and pushed through the pain that shot up his leg, showing some of the usual Gilbert fire. His leg was drug behind him uselessly. His clothing around his knee was stained red and blood ran down his nose from his forehead from when his head slammed into the controls.

He watched as the exit inched closer and closing. The prevailing heat slowly started to fade as he and Elizabetha inched away from the cabin area. His heart beat quickened. He was so close to freedom! So close to gaining a life he thought was destined to perish. He was so close to gaining the thing the plane had tried to snatch from him.

He barely had any warning of the next disaster. He heard a strange noise and turned his head back towards the front window when a control box exploded. A piece of flaming hot metal sliced past one of his eyes. What felt like thousands of tiny little razors ripped his clothing. Both him and Elizabetha lost their balance and crashed to the ground. Gilbert thought quick and positioned himself above Elizabetha to prevent her from getting hurt. Pain exploded from his knee as it slammed with the floor. He let out a muffled cry and closed his eyes.

He was quickly choked by a veil of black nothingness as the pain grew too much for him to handle.

Elizabetha was suddenly dazed as she and Gilbert was knocked off balance by a huge pressure behind them. They tumbled to the ground, Gilbert shielding Elizabetha's body with his own. She heard a soft cry escaped his cracked lips.

As soon as the last bits settled, Elizabetha rose. Her heart nearly skipped a beat when she felt Gilbert's dead weight hanging on her. She carefully turned around and was horrified to see him so limp. Her immediate thoughts were that Gilbert was dead. His face was grotesque; blood rapidly dripping from a deep wound somewhere around his eyes. Elizabetha couldn't pinpoint where the exact wound was since blood painted a large area around his eye. A chocked sob escaped her throat.

"G-Gil?" she whispered. She could hardly recognize her own voice. It was so harsh and raspy. The taste of ash was thick in her mouth, making her stomach churn in disgust. Almost like a zombie, a trembling hand gently felt along his neck. Her heart beat quicker to feel his heart beating against her touch. He was still fighting. Despite Gilbert's loss of hope, his body wouldn't abandon hope.

Elizabetha carefully stood up, trying not to hurt him by moving him. She didn't know if the force of the explosion had hurt him in another way other than the wound on his face and the rips in his clothing. She carefully wrapped his arm around her shoulder and held him up with a hand on his waist.

The plane was starting to sink even quicker now. Elizabetha's heart beat accelerated at every creak, drop or splash. She could hear the others voices outside, driving her to continue even more. She could hear Gilbert's voice in her head; louder than anything else. Replaying his voice over and over like a record player reminded her of what she could lose if she wasn't careful. Each footstep took her closer and closer to her escape. Each step brought her closer to salvation. Each step brought her closer to guaranteeing Gilbert's safety.

As she neared the door, Ludwig noticed her struggling over with a limp Gilbert and ran over to help. He had heard the small explosion and had been watching carefully with the eyes of a hawk. He collected Gilbert's body into his grasp and hurried to the door, flanked by the Hungarian. He handed Gilbert off to Roderick and then helped Elizabetha into one of the emergency floats. Elizabetha paused to help Ludwig out before turning her attention back to Gilbert.

It was now too dark to see what he looked like other than the dark patch of blood around his eye. His chest rose and fell weakly; his breathing weak and raspy like a chain smoker. His injured leg was stretched out, his jeans stained red around his knees. It broke Elizabetha's heart to see him in such conditions. She traced his jawline and caressed his cheek before ripping the hem of her dress into long strips that she wrapped around his eye, knee and forehead. It wasn't professional looking by no means but it would at least do for the moment until Gilbert could receive better medical attention.

The night drug on slowly. Everyone was silent for the most part; albeit some occasional chatting or discussions. Water gently lapped at the sides of the boat. There was a sound unlike any other when the plane was finally consumed by the dark water, great bubbles emerging from the water. At one point, Arthur started freaking out because the water washed Alfred's smell off of his bomber jacket. Practically everyone tried to console him and calm him down. He eventually silenced when he slipped into a deep sleep from exhaustion.

The only light source they had was the moon but even that was starting to sink towards the horizon. Gilbert's white hair looked ghost like when the moonlight shined against it. The sun would rise soon as result of the fading moon. Almost everyone fell asleep at one point or another but Elizabetha stayed up with Ludwig the entire time to watch the raft and to check up on Gilbert.

In the early hours of the morning, just as the sun was beginning to peak out from its night slumber, a sliver of land grew in the distance. When Elizabetha came to the realization that land was ahead, she woke everyone up with a joyous cry;

"Land! Everyone look! There's land!" More effective than any alarm clock, everyone woke up quickly. Murmurs of excitement echoed around the boat. For the first time in a while, everyone was grinning and even cheering. Gilbert stayed unconscious however, which did deter Elizabetha's good news.

They watched as the raft slowly inched towards the island at an agonizingly slow pace. Eventually, they grew impatient and started paddling with whatever they had; mostly being their hands.

The sun continued to inch its way further into the sky. Dawn shined down upon the exhausted refugees like a beam from heaven, guiding them to their haven. The suns golden fingers pointed the way to safety and hope.

The rays led the group towards Nantucket Island on the country of the United States of America.

**A/N:** HEY GUYS! Happy late Valentine's day! I loves you all! Off that note, I had a few short things to say. I know I haven't updated in a while but I appreciate every review so please make sure that you send one in. Another thing, I was wondering what kind of critique you have for my writing. I know I need to develop my skills in word diction and variety in sentence structure but what else would you suggest. Thanks and love you all!


	26. Chapter 26

**Lost. Chapter 26.**

**A/N:** Hey guys. Only 10 more reviews to 200 reviews. Reviews have been a little slow lately but I know you guys are reading. My goal is to reach 200 reviews within the next two chapters. I know you guys can do it since previous chapters have gotten between 10-20 reviews. I love hearing your guys opinions on plot and my writing. I always love to improve and the plot isn't set in stone so you never know if I might use a suggestion of yours. Oh and definitely listen to this song. I heard it for a drill team performance by rescued horses and the whole thing was absolutely moving. Seriously, look it up, it'll make your day.

**Disclaimer:** Hikari does not own Hetalia.

There's gotta be another way out

I've been stuck in a cage with my doubt

I've tried forever getting out on my own

Every time I do this my way

I get caught in the lies of the enemy

I lay my troubles down I'm ready for you now

Break me out

Come and find me in the dark now

Every day by myself I'm breaking down

I don't want to fight alone anymore

Break me out

From the prison of my own pride

My God I need a hope I can't deny

In the end I'm realizing, I was never meant to fight on my own

Every little thing that I've known

Is everything I need to let go

You're so much bigger than world I have made

So I surrender my soul

Im reaching out for your hope

I lay my weapons down, Im ready for you now

Break me out

Come and find me in the dark now

Every day by myself I'm breaking down

I don't want to fight alone anymore

Break me out

From the prison of my own pride

My God I need a hope I can't deny

In the end I'm realizing, I was never meant to fight on my own

I don't want to be incomplete

I remember what you said to me

I don't have to fight alone

Break me out

Come and find me in the dark now

Every day by myself I'm breaking down

I don't want to fight alone anymore

Break me out

From the prison of my own pride

My God I need a hope I can't deny

In the end I'm realizing, I was never meant to fight on my own

Lyrics to On My Own by Ashes Remain

Upon reaching Nantucket island, the boat occupants dove out of the boat and threw themselves into the water. Their joyful cried filled the air and the whole atmosphere seemed to be affected. Elizabetha and Ludwig guided the boat to the shore as the others swam ahead. All exhaustion was forgotten; relief and hope fueling their fatigued bodies.

Once the boat was stuck in the sand and wouldn't go any further, Ludwig collected Gilbert's body carefully into his arms gingerly. Face twitching in pain, Gilbert laid limply in Ludwig's grasp. With Elizabetha faithfully by his side, Ludwig carried his brother to the others so they could search for a hotel and hospital.

Elizabetha's eyes were trained on Gilbert's face. In his sleep, he couldn't hide his pain like he would in consciousness. The corners of his dirt streaked mouth tugged in a wince with every bounce in Ludwig's quick step. Ludwig tried to walk smoothly but he was urgent to get his only brother to medical care. His legs swayed slightly, causing Gilbert's mouth to twitch from the pain in his knee.

The others had run up the shore and thrown themselves onto the beach. The salty air was sweet in the mouth of those who had thought they wouldn't live to see land. The sand clung to their wet and sweaty bodies but they welcomed the gritty feeling. They would welcome nearly any feeling when it meant they were alive.

Ludwig took a moment to pause and look back at the sunset. He wasn't one to appreciate things like that but after everything that happened, he had the strange urge to just relax and appreciate the beautiful morning he thought he wouldn't live to see.

He wanted to join the others in the sand but he didn't want to take the chance of aggravating Gilbert's wounds either by the sand or unnecessary movement. Instead, he resigned to looking at the sun slowly climbing into the sky. Soft colors delicately painted the sky, stretching out across the span of the horizon. It was a sunrise he had not expected to see. He just wished that Gilbert was awake to see it and appreciate it.

"Ludwig?" Elizabetha's asked in a hushed voice. Ludwig tore his eyes away from the subset to look at his brother's girlfriend. He didn't know what he thought of her at the moment. She had been unnecessarily harsh to Gilbert but she had risked her life to get Gilbert out of the plane. She could have easily left him there and escaped, saving herself from the small scratches she had received from the mini-explosion, even though Gilbert had protected her from any larger injuries.

"Ja?" Ludwig asked. He kept his voice neutral so that he wouldn't sound judgmental or too soft. Elizabetha wasn't looking at Ludwig though. Her eyes were stuck on Gilbert and had been ever since Ludwig carried him from the plane. Ludwig followed her gaze and noted that she was staring at Gilbert's blood stained bandage over his eye.

"I-is Gil ok?" she asked. Her voice was uncharacteristically timid; barely over a whisper. Ludwig sighed. He didn't know how to answer that question. He didn't know the full extent of his brothers injuries nor did he know where to get help at. He didn't recognize the island but he assumed he was somewhere near America.

"I don't know." Ludwig admitted, another low sigh escaping chapped lips. He looked away from Elizabetha, not willing to look at her concerned face. "We need to find out where we are and find the closest hospital."

Elizabetha nodded in agreement. "Yes, I'm worried about his knee." she looked at his face thoughtfully before adding, "And his eye."

Ludwig sighed and nodded. "I hate to rush them but..." he let his sentence hang. Elizabetha took the hint and turned her back to him.

"Let's get going guys! We can't rest; we're not safe yet!" she exclaimed. She glanced up at the dawn sky, listening for the faint hum of a plane engine. All was silent, deafeningly silent. The others got what she was trying to say but wasn't willing to say.

Rising from the sand, their hopes renewed and new found energy fueling their bodies, they were ready to face all the challenges that they might be forced to face. Faces set in determined frowns spread throughout the group. Everything they thought was starting to turn shoulder and slap them in the face. They didn't know if some of their allies were really their allies, now wary in response to Matthew's betrayal, and they didn't know how much time was left for them. Alfred and Ivan's death still hung heavily over them.

Ludwig couldn't help but smile at their determination. He just hoped that Gilbert still carried the same determination in order to survive. He's survived this far; past WWI, WWII, and his dissolution. He could survive this as well. Just as Old Man Fritz had said once "I must in the face of a storm, think, live and die as a king".

They regrouped and headed opposite direction from the beach in search of a hospital. Gilbert was rendered unconscious for the entire time. Scarlet blood bled through the creamy colored bandages, a splash of color against white, just as his blood would have been upon his milky skin had it not been smeared in dust, ash and grit. Elizabetha remained faithfully by his side in Ludwig's arms. In the corner of her eye, she noticed how Roderick would glance back at them with a concerned look. He was with the others, helping anyone if they stumbled or grew tired as they trekked on. Ludwig seemed to have an endless source of energy. He wouldn't allow himself to take a break or let anyone take Gilbert from him.

After what seemed was hours but was only in reality a few minutes, they reached a sign by a road that read 'Coskata-Coatue Wildlife Refuge'. Ludwig's eyes narrowed in confusion.

"Uh, where are we?" he asked quietly. Arthur looked at the sign and a look of recognition crossed his features. An affectionate smile graced his lips if only for a moment but the smile lifted the look of misery and exhaustion off of his face.

"We're on Nantucket island! Alfred's cowlick!" Arthur exclaimed. It felt good to finally realize where he was and he felt at home on this soil even though he was hundreds of miles from his home.

"Ok...if we're on Nantucket island then where is a hospital?" Ludwig asked quickly. Quickly, he added, "If there is one". Part of him doubted that there would be a hospital them but another part told him that they would need one being on an island.

"I believe it's on the other end of the island." Arthur tentatively mumbled, hating to be the one to tell Ludwig that he would have to carry his injured brother that far. "But we can find someone who will give us a ride!" Arthur quickly added.

Ludwig frowned and let out a deep sigh. "Ok. Let's get moving. I want to get Gilbert medical attention as quickly as possible. He waited long enough." Ludwig grumbled, proceeding forward down the road at a brisk pace, his energy renewed.

Elizabetha hurried after him and was closely trailed by the others. Ludwig managed to flag down one of the few cars and was able to hitch a ride to Nantucket's only hospital on the far end of the island; Nantucket Cottage Hospital. Ludwig finally handed his brother off into the capable hands of a doctor. He sat in the lobby silently with Elizabetha and the others. They didn't tell the hospital staff about the plant wreck. They just told the doctors that they had been on a camping-trip-gone-bad and left it as that.

Ludwig's mind was reeling. Who had shot their plane down? Did the person responsible know they were still alive? Would they go after them and hunt them down? Could they be safe on Nantucket Island or should they leave as soon as Gilbert was able, whenever that may be. Questions plagued his min. He couldn't calm down; couldn't relax. His shoulders felt heavy with the pressure of the whole situation and he felt more stressed than he did during a war; probably because he didn't have Feli by his side.

Ludwig's thoughts changed from questions to his brother. He wondered what would be wrong with him and how long it would take for him to recover. His brother technically wasn't a country but he had continued to live and not age so maybe he could still heal at the same rate of a country. His wounds had looked painful but it would be easy for a country to recover from them.

A hand rested over Ludwig's hands crossed in his lap. Ludwig jumped and snapped out of his thoughts. He looked to the owner of the hand and felt his face grow red with embarrassment to see Elizabetha trying not to giggle.

"Sorry, Ludwig. I didn't mean to scare you." she apologized. "You just looked like you were spacing out."

Ludwig sighed and ran a hand through dirty blond hair. "Sorry," he mumbled, "I guess I'm just a little worried."

"It's ok to be worried; completely normal." Elizabetha smiled. "He's your brother. He'd be worried about you too and we all know he says that worrying isn't awesome but it can't be helped when a person you love is hurt."

Ludwig allowed a small smile to tug at his chapped lips. The Hungarian woman always knew what to say to cheer him up. "Danke, Elizabetha." he murmured quietly. Despite all that happened, he was still awkward with emotions. He should have learned but it was too hard for him to do even though his difficulty was what helped to set Feliciano off.

Elizabetha patted his knee roughly as Gilbert might have done. Ludwig could practically see Gilbert grinning and slapping his knee or punching his arm or ruffling his hair. At least Gilbert had a girl like Elizabetha who stuck with him even during arguments. They understood each other better than anyone else and were meant for each other.

"Gilbert Beilschmidt?" a doctor asked, walking out of the room a few hours later. Those that were awake stood up, chairs squeaking in protest. The doctor blinked surprised when he saw how many people was there and how dirty they were.

"You all can't go in at once. Two at a time." The doctor informed them before promptly returning to the room. Without the need to discuss, Elizabetha and Ludwig followed the man intently.

Their hearts broke to see Gilbert lying in the hospital room, so frail and ashen. A bandage was wound around his forehead and around his eye. His knee was set in a brace to help it heal. He was still unconscious, his chest rising and falling rhythmically.

Approaching the bed quietly, Ludwig and Elizabetha scanned his body solemnly. He looked so frail compared to his usual muscular build. Ludwig's hand hovered over his head, calloused hands just barely grazing the bandages.

"We were too late to save the vision in his eye." the doctor informed them in a morose tone.

"Y-you mean...?" Elizabetha stammered, shock and horror spreading through her body like electricity.

The doctor nodded. "He's blind in one eye. His other eye is fine but his knee had been broken. It needs to stay in this brace for a while and he won't be able to walk without assistance for a few weeks." the doctor said.

A trembling hand rested over Gilbert's pale hand. Elizabetha closed her eyes tightly, remembering how she told him he was blind before the plane crash. She didn't want to imagine what it would have been like to really loose him. The Prussian could have been loud, obnoxious, cocky or malicious but he had a good heart no matter how much he tried to cover it up.

To loose Gilbert would be like losing half of herself.

She didn't even realize she was crying until Ludwig put his hand over hers. Her small sniffing turned to sobs, their volume increasing. Her hand not being touched by Ludwig was desperately trying to rub her eyes.

Ludwig, struggling with tears now himself, rubbed the top of Elizabetha's hand in soothing circles. A soft moan went unheard to their ears. A single scarlet eyes cracked open, drinking in the sights of the new surroundings quickly. Gilbert's gaze fell on Elizabetha. Without even really having to think about it, a pale hand gently cupped her cheek. His thumb gently brushed the tears away. Guilt stabbed his heart. If he had been smarter or thought better, he could have prevented Elizabetha's sadness. She already had enough to stress about without him making it worse.

"Hey," he whispered to her softly. Elizabetha looked at him with puffy red eyes, her cheeks pink from a plush and from the tears.

"G-Gil!" she stammered, "Y-you idiot! You scared the crap out of me!"

Gilbert smiled. That was his Elizabetha alright. "There's no need to get worried. Nothing ever happens to awesome people." Gilbert smirked.

Elizabetha smiled and laughed. Her laugh wasn't her usual laugh though. It sounded airy almost, as if she just had a great weight lifted off of her shoulders. Her smile did a strange thing to Gilbert. His heart thumped against his ribcage and his breath seemed to catch in his throat. Never the less, he managed a grin.

"I don't know if I'd call this nothing." Elizabetha teased playfully.

"Are you trying to imply that I'm not awesome?" Gilbert smirked. Something about Elizabetha's attitude changed again. Leave it to a girl to be crying then laughing then on the verge of tears again.

"No," Elizabetha whispered. She leaned forward and placed a sweet kiss upon his chapped lips. "You are awesome. I'm sorry for the hurtful things I said earlier."

A light blush tinted Gilbert's pale face. His heart yet again thumped against his ribcage. He was acutely aware of his little brother standing nearby. "It's fine. I was being an ass as well."

"I was a bigger ass though so..."

"Of course you've got a bigger ass!" Gilbert interjected her. He could only stay serious for so long before he had to tease someone or declare his awesomeness.

Elizabetha's mouth dropped open and Gilbert would have sworn a bug flew in it. "GILBERT!" she bellowed in a voice even Germany could envy.

"KESESESE!" Gilbert snickered. His shoulders shook in laughter and soon Elizabetha couldn't help but join in.

"Oh God," Elizabetha laughed, wiping more tears though this time from laughing too hard, "I love you, Gil."

Gilbert blushed. He was never a man off emotions that wasn't cockiness but his near death experience caused him to appreciate the things he usually wouldn't just a little more, of only for a few moments.

A gently smile tugged his mouth into a smile. Not a smirk or grin but a affectionate smile that melted Elizabetha's heart and her cheeks.

"I love you too, Liz" he whispered.

**A/N:** Sorry for this being so late. Please let me know of any mistakes or suggestions. Please don't forget to review! ;;w;;


	27. Chapter 27

**Lost. Chapter 27.**

**A/N:** OMG! 200 reviews for this story on fanfiction! I didn't count DA but I'm not forgetting you guys either. Thank you guys so so much! I never would have thought this story would get so many reviews! I love you guys so much you have no freaking idea! -sniffles- See? You made me cry!

**Disclaimer:**Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia.

Gilbert remained in the hospital for a day before he was released with a pair of crutches, an eye patch and some heavy pain medication.

Ludwig carried his medicine as Elizabetha helped Gilbert walk outside. His knee was still in a brace to keep it from moving. He loved having the eye patch saying it brought back old memories of the 'good ol' pirate days.' Arthur didn't comment on it much to Gilbert's disappointment.

Being in America was like rubbing salt on Arthur's wounds. It didn't help that Francis was missing and that Feliciano could be doing God-knows-what to him. He was worried sick for Francis. He couldn't stand the thought of losing him after he had already lost Alfred. He didn't know if he could live without the both of them; he had loved them both so much. Much more than he would have first thought before these horrible circumstances.

Gilbert felt bad for the Brit but he didn't know what to say. Arthur and Yao seemed to be sticking together. They found comfort in knowing that they weren't the only one who lost loved ones. They didn't talk much to each other; nothing needed to be said. They just stood by each other surrounded by a dreary, hopeless feeling. Regardless, their two negatives made a positive and they were able to draw comfort from their dreary feelings.

Sadly, it didn't have the same affect for the others. Eventually everyone would glance back as if to check on them. Quietness soon filled the already stuffy air and stuffed up their throats.

They all agreed to catch a bus to take them to the docks rather than walk there. After being stuck in the hospital for what feels like forever, what they all really wanted to do was take a walk in fresh air. However, considering Gilbert's leg, they decided a bus would be more efficient and less harmful.

They all coughed up enough American money to pay for all of their boat fairs to get back to the main land. Arthur stared across the water silently throughout the entire boat ride. He kept his emerald gaze fixed on the horizon as if in a trance. No one dared bother him or drag him from his trance. Yao had a similar look but only looked down at the dirty planks of the boat as if they were the most fascinating thing in the world or as if the markings on the wood could tell him what was going to happen in the future.

The other passengers on the boat noticed their solemn look. One little girl who only looked to be six walked up to Gilbert curiously. "What happened to you?" she asked in an innocent voice that Gilbert had almost forgotten. He could just barely remember the times when he and Elizabetha sounded that innocent, or anyone else for that matter. Times had changed and would continue changing; hopefully they changed for the better this time.

"We were camping." Gilbert only replied. He was able to muster a smirk for the little girl who smiled that he was actually talking and smiling at her.

"Why?" she asked. Gilbert chuckled softly. What and why seemed to be a child's favorite word. It brought so many memories back into his mind that he couldn't help but smile. He remembered raising Ludwig as a little boy.

"Because I like to camp. All awesome people like to camp." Gilbert told her, still chuckling under his breath. Memories of his life as the Great Prussia came back to his mind. He remembered living in the woods. It was a rough life but it was his life. He enjoyed living amongst the wildness; living off of the things he caught and made for himself.

Ludwig and Elizabetha glanced over at him, glad that he was acting a little bit like himself and seemed to have lost his hopelessness.

"I don't like to camp." the girl retorted. Elizabetha chuckled softly as Gilbert raised a pale eyebrow.

"Is that so? Well you're still pretty awesome, kid. Not as awesome as myself but you seem pretty awesome." Gilbert said smirking his classic smirk.

"Are you a pirate?" the girl asked, staring at his eye patch in wonder. Gilbert just chuckled, glancing at Arthur but disappointed that he didn't look over.

"Ja. I'm part of a pirate band on Nantucket Island." Gilbert told her.

"Do you have a parrot that sits on your shoulder?"

"Yep."

"Do you like gold?"

"Totally."

Elizabetha chuckled as the little girl fired questions at Gilbert with eyes as wide as saucers. Gilbert just answered her, smirk never fading from his face. He seemed to actually be enjoying himself around the little girl.

There was something about her innocence that all the countries envied. They longed for the time when they had been like that and didn't have a care in the world. They were only worried about their clothing or hair or if the weather would be nice to play in. Now, burdens weighed their shoulders down and shackled them to reality like a prison ball chained to a prisoner's foot. They were trapped. They could not escape.

Eventually, the little girl's parents called her and she had to leave. The boat made it to the main land and everyone departed, heading to their own destinations.

"We should find a bus to take us to Washington." Ludwig suggested after everyone had regrouped.

"Wait, can we be safe there?" Gilbert asked. He leaned on his crutches casually. He locked his hand with Elizabetha who smiled happily. Talking with the girl had lightened the load on his shoulders. He felt reenergized; like he could take on the day.

He glanced over at the people who were the quietest as of lately; Arthur, Yao, Kiku and Mei. "What do you guys think?" he asked, trying to draw them into the conversation.

Arthur and Yao only shrugged. Kiku and Mei looked over, thoughtfully. "It would be a long bus ride. I do not know if we have enough money for everyone." Kiku stated.

"Doesn't anyone think it's strange that America is still same even though its representation is dead?" Roderick asked. He too hadn't spoken in a while. He didn't want to speak to much about their plans. It was still a soft subject for him since he used to be Feliciano's boss.

A long silence followed Roderick's observation. He had made a valid point. Nothing seemed to be wrong with America at all. Alfred's death should have triggered some kind of reaction.

"Let's not worry about that, right now." Ludwig regrouped everyone, "We need to focus instead of getting to someplace safe where we can discuss plans. Washington D.C would provide adequate protection as well as access to some military plans."

"You have a point." Kiku nodded.

"We can't afford a bus trip, we don't have a car, and planes are out of the question, same with walking. What else do we have?" Elizabetha asked.

The others were silent. One could almost hear their brains trying to think of a solution.

"We're countries aren't we? We can call the capital and request vehicles." Arthur said quietly. Heads swiveled to look at him. Pleased by his input, Gilbert smirked.

"Great idea, Artie!" Gilbert exclaimed. "Anyone got a phone?"

Everyone's phone had been either lost or destroyed in the plane crash. "Ok, then let's ask to borrow a phone!"

They sent Roderick to ask for a phone since he was the most polite. A nice young lady agreed and lent him his phone. He dialed the number from memory and quietly spoke with a lady. After a short conversation he hung up and politely thanked the lady who lent him his phone. She blushed and hurried off while Roderick returned.

"A few cars will pick us up in 30-45 minutes. In that time, they said we should meet them by the police station." Roderick informed them.

The others agreed, glad that their plans were starting to come together. Soon enough, this mess would be over and they could start to try to live their lives again as if it had never happened; despite the loss of a few of their friends.

What they were not aware of was that Mattie had sent some men to Nantucket and the surrounding area to search in case they weren't dead.

**A/N:** That's all for now. Sorry for being so late and so short and so bad. I know you deserve better but I just can't seem to sit and write. I have time but I just can't for some reason. DX. Thank you all again for all the reviews and favorites or watches. As a thank you, I will be taking requests. If you want me to write a Hetalia story for you, send in a review and tell me what you want. Sorry, but I don't do any sexual stuff besides some kisses. Sorry. Have a great day!


	28. Chapter 28

Lost. Chapter 28

A/N: This chapter will be a little different than other chapters. Point of views will change often and at some times will show multiple sides.

In the middle of a gun fight  
>In the center of a restaurant<br>They say, come with your arms raised high  
>Well they're never gonna get me<br>Like a bullet through a flock of doves  
>To wage this war against your faith, in me<br>Your life, will never be the same  
>On your mothers eyes, say a prayer, say a prayer!<p>

Now but I can't  
>And I don't know<br>How we're just two men as god had made us  
>Well I can't, well I can<br>Too much, too late or just not enough of this  
>Pain in my heart for your dying wish<br>I'll kiss your lips again

They all cheat at cards and the checkers are lost,  
>My cellmate's a killer, they make me do push-ups (in drag)<br>But nobody cares if you're losing yourself...am I losing myself?  
>Well I miss my mom<br>Will they give me the chair, a lethal injection  
>Or swing from a rope if you dare<br>Ah, nobody knows all the trouble I've seen

No but I can't  
>And I don't know<br>How we're just two men as God had made us  
>Well I can't, well I can<br>Too much, too late or just not enough of this  
>Pain in my heart for your dying wish<br>I'll kiss your lips again

To your room  
>What they ask of you<br>They'll make you want to say "So long"  
>but I don't remember<br>Why remember, YOU!

Do you have the keys to the hotel?  
>I'm gonna strike the motherfucker on fire! (FIRE!)<p>

Life is but a dream for the dead,  
>And well I, I won't go down by myself<br>But I'll go down with my friends.  
>Now now now now (I can't explain)<br>Now now now (I can't complain)  
>Now now, yeah!<p>

Lyrics to Do You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison by My Chemical Romance

"How did the mission go?" Feliciano asked. The Italian leaned over his desk. He rested his head over his gloved hands and looked at his fratello, his eyes shining and lips pulled back other his white teeth in a smirk. He knew the answer already but he wanted to hear it come from Romano and see the pride in him at completing his first mission.

Romano's white teeth smiled back at Feliciano and his eyes darkened dangerously, "It was a success." he reported, "Antonio and Ivan is dead now and we have captured Francis, as you have requested."

Feliciano nodded approvingly. He had to admit, his older brother was turning out to be one of his best allies. He had the guts and the drive; he might be able to take them to victory. Romano could help his brother and his band of misfits succeed and make those who had ruled over them and taunted them pay. They finally had their moment to shine, to be the ones to rise above and rule. It brought joy to Feliciano that his brother would be able to be a part of this and be able to share the satisfaction and delight of seeing those who had been so strong crumble under their hands.

Feliciano stood and clapped a hand over Romano's shoulder, "Good joy, Fratello. You did well!" he praised him and smiled. He made contact with Romano's golden eyes and was pleased to see they too were hardened and hungry for more. Feliciano let out a chortle and smirked.

"When is our next mission?" Romano asked, his unflinching gaze burrowing into Feliciano's own unwavering stare.

Feliciano smiled, pleased with his enthusiasm, "Unfortunately, it is not for a while now. We're just going to give them some time to get settled in America and then Mattie has his men ready to commence the next set of plans. But I'm sure there will be plenty for you to do and I'm sure Mattie could use some help." Feliciano purred.

Romano smiled, obviously liking Feliciano's response. He nodded respectfully, "Is there anything you would like me to do?" he asked.

Feliciano shook his head. He paused, his eyebrows knitting together. He smirked at an idea that popped into his head, "Actually, you can do one thing."

"Si?"

"Send Peter in, will ya?" Feliciano smirked, his brown orbs gleaming. Romano looked surprised for a moment but nodded again.

"Yes." he simply answered before going out. Within a few minutes, Peter opened the door and peeked through. Feliciano motioned him in and the small boy came close, his smirk mirroring Feliciano's.

Time seemed to fly by. The paper work was hastily brushed off the desk to the floor and was replaced by Peter. Feliciano pinned him to the table and pressed their lips together in a crushing kiss. Peter wrapped his arms around Feliciano's neck and pulled him close. A fire seemed to spark within Feliciano; though not the spark he had felt when his skin accidentally brushed against Ludwig's. It felt oddly different and he couldn't explain how.

He thrust his tongue in Peter's mouth and tasted the inside of his mouth. He swept along the roof of his mouth and let his eyes drift close. Peter wrapped his legs around Feliciano's waist, causing a groan to escape from Feliciano's mouth and into Peters. Their hot breaths mingled and their hands wandered and explored the rest of each other's bodies. Both were desperate for affection but both seemed to be unsatisfied and wanted more.

The fire intensified, Feliciano realized. It burned within him, craving more. Each kiss was like blowing air onto a fire and making it flame up, consuming anything near or around it. He forced himself close to Peter, their bodies so close that he could feel him everywhere but at the same time, his mind was elsewhere and Peter was nowhere. He did not feel Peter's small arms around his neck. Instead, he felt strong, warm arms holding him close, gently exploring the curves of his body. Arms that the simple touch caused him to feel warmth spread across his chest and through his body, taming the fire of want. He did not feel his body against his; instead he felt his own back against the soft sheets of a bed and felt a strong, chiseled body enveloping his, surrounding him completely with a feeling of safety and comfort. He did not feel Peter's bruising lips; he only felt bigger, fuller and gentler kisses, moving from his lips to his jaw and leaving a line to his neck where they gently kissed the tender skin and whispered words of love to him.

The fire was not the reaction of wanting more of Peter; but of wanting more than Peter. He knew who that person was; it was the person he hated the most yet whom he had also wanted the most.

No sooner had he realized this that there was a knock at the door. Feliciano, half glad for an excuse, pulled up and quickly straightened his disheveled hair, avoiding the curl, and smoothing out his uniform. Peter was also soon up from the desk and making himself decent.

"Who is it?" Feliciano asked, sounding as though he had a grip on the situation. He knew he was confused; why was he still having these feelings for a man who he hated, who had caused him so much pain, who had been a catalyst that had caused him to form his plan? Luckily though, his voice was more reliable than his thoughts and emotions and he was able to stay cool and collected despite the swarm of emotions in his mind.

"We have a new prisoner," one of Feliciano's guards grumbled in a rough voice.

Feliciano smiled and he wondered who his new prisoner was. Part of him hoped it was Germany but the other, stronger part hoped it wasn't. That would take all the fun out of his plan.

"Come in."

The door was opened and parted to reveal a dead man...or at least a man Feliciano had thought was dead. Green eyes stared at him with an unreadable expression. His arms were held by a guard on either side of his body and did not seem uncomfortable despite having been captured. In fact, he looked almost comfortable.

"Antonio?" Feliciano asked, remembering to keep his cool. He nodded to the guards who sat the Spaniard in a chair and closed the door, taking the care to lock it as well. Antonio sat in the chair as if it was just a business meeting. Not only did this confuse Feliciano but it infuriated him he had the nerve to look so calm and casual in his office when he had been told he was dead. Romano HAD told him he was dead. Killed him himself. So why was he sitting before him looking so calmly?

Feliciano smirked. If Antonio could play games; so could he. He sat down in his desk chair and folded his hands over the oak surface. He scanned the Spaniards body for a moment. The Spaniard stared back at him almost as if he couldn't decide whether or not he should speak first. Feliciano's mouth curved into a smile that would make even the Cheshire cat jealous. He leaned back casually and Antonio seemed to let out a breath that Feliciano hadn't realized the Spaniard had been holding.

"So, what brings you to my office?" he asked. Maybe sounding like a school principle would help him to relax...not that he wanted him to. He wanted Antonio to fear Feliciano and his brother but he wanted to test and see how the Spaniard would act. Part of him hoped he would act cocky so he could beat some respect into him but another part of him wanted him to tremble and quake with fear.

"U-uh..." the Spaniard stuttered. It was as if he had suddenly gotten cold feet. It caused Feliciano's eyes to sparkle with a twisted delight. He loved to see others react this way to him. It reminded him that he was in power now. People took him seriously now. They no longer thought of him as the weak Italian who only waved white flags and ran to Ludwig for help. He was not that person he had pretended to be anymore. He wanted to make those who had been cruel to him to wave a flag and run to Ludwig for help. He wanted to make them all break; break like the way Feliciano had broke. No matter how much he wanted to deny it, he still had the ugly scars marring the tan skin on his wrists as a constant reminder of his weakness and also a reminder of how strong he had gotten since then.

"Spit it out." He ordered sharply.

Antonio took a deep breath and forced himself to relax. Not only did he surprise Feliciano but he surprised himself by looking straight into the Italians eyes. His green eyes were calm and respectful; not filled with hatred or fear or betrayal or anything Feliciano expected from him.

"I want to join your side." Antonio declared. Feliciano blinked at the Spaniard but kept his face straight. He leaned over on his desk, propping his head up with his hands again. An amused smile took the grins place and his eyes glistened with anticipation. He really wanted to hear this now.

"Do you now? That's awful strange considering we've tried to kill you twice now...that is...unless you still don't remember the first time." Feliciano smirked at his words hit his target. Antonio flinched at the words but much to Feliciano's surprise, he smoothed a determined expression on his face.

"I do not remember much except for a few little spots of memory." Antonio told him respectfully. From his tone, it sounded as if he was at a job interview and in a way, he was. Only, if he couldn't get Feliciano to trust him, there was a chance that he would be added to the quickly growing list of fallen countries. He had already risked blowing Romano's cover by coming here but he could not stand to let his little tomato to be in any sort of danger. He still didn't like Romano being part of Feliciano's group even though it was just to spy. If anything, that made it worse. Feliciano was unpredictable. He may be very capable of killing his own brother if he found out he was spying for Feliciano's enemies.

"I see." Feliciano nodded, "So if you can't remember much, why are you here?"

Antonio took a breath. He knew this was the most important part of all. He had to sell his story and make it look believable. If he didn't, he risked his life and possibly Romano's cover and he could not let that happen.

He looked straight into Feliciano's eyes in an unwavering, determined stare. He bit back his grin of satisfaction when he saw Feliciano's expression look surprised for just a fraction of a second.

"I can remember little spots of memory from my past. Like for example, I know England was an enemy of mine and we still have grudges against each other. Ever since I lost my memory, Romano had been the one caring for me...or so I thought. Back with the others, England had turned everyone against me but Romano stayed with me. He was patient with me while the others quickly grew impatient. He was the only one I could feel comfortable around. He helped me to forget the cruelness of the others. Then he tried to kill me." Antonio took a pained breath, working a few tears into the corners of his eyes. "Without him, it felt as of everyone hated me. They teased me and picked on me constantly and filled my head with horrible memories that I knew weren't true. I became their fun game; they locked me out of their shelters and made me sleep outside. They shunned me from their group and I can take it anymore. I can't take their cruelness and they're sick games. I want to be treated better. I want revenge."

Antonio let the last sentence hang in the air. He was trembling like a leaf. Feliciano could see the angry scowl on his face and took it for his strong desire, no, his need for revenge. Antonio tried to calm the rapid beating of his heart. It felt as though it was going to break through his rib cage and burst from his chest. He hoped desperately that his story would work. He could practically see his and Romano's fate hanging above his head by a thin string.

Feliciano stayed silent. So Antonio sighed and finished his speech, "I-I realize what I have done to Romano in the past. I have hurt him badly and I do not blame him for what he did. But I am a changed man now. I want to make things better between him and me. I want to help him get revenge for what the others did. Despite what he did to me..." Antonio took a breath. This part he wasn't faking and it was hard to say aloud. He had started to realize it himself but he hardly wanted to admit it. It just felt so weird when he hardly knew Romano yet he also felt as though he knew him so well, "Despite what he did to me, I still love him. I love him with all my heart. I feel horrible for what I did and I understand if he doesn't want to see me or talk to me but I just want him to know how sorry I am for hurting him."

The air seemed to become too hot and the room too cramped. He pulled at the collar of his shirt trying to let air in. He could feel his face flaming red. His heart was pounding faster in his chest that it was like it was going to fly away and he would have no chance of helping his tomato. His sweaty hands dropped to his lap and trembled once more.

Feliciano rubbed his chin with a hand. He leaned back in his chair, thinking with a blank expression. Antonio gulped and waited for his sentence. Time seemed to freeze and Antonio's heart only seemed to beat furiously, almost painfully. Feliciano seemed to notice and took even more time, occasionally "hmmm"ing in thought.

Antonio froze when Feliciano glanced up at him with an unreadable expression. He held his breath, scarcely daring to breath. The string holding his and Romano's fates seemed to be thinning.

Oh God, what have I done!

Feliciano put his hands on the table and looked up at Antonio, the corners of his mouth being tugged by a frown. Antonio's heart stopped right then, panic coursing through him faster than any drug.

I'm sorry, Lovi! Please, forgive me!

"Fine." Feliciano said. Wait what? "But consider yourself on probation. If I think for a moment that you causing trouble or are disloyal, I will kill you, no questions asked!"

Antonio's heart started up again and a relieved smile spread across his tan face. Feliciano glared back to assure that his message was received

"Thank you very much, sir! I promise you won't be disappointed!" Antonio exclaimed happily. Feliciano rolled his eyes.

"I'll believe it when I see it. I have to discuss something upstairs so I guess I'll show you to your room." Feliciano groaned. He stood up and Antonio was surprised by how large the Italians muscles were. They weren't the size of Ludwig's or Ivan's or Alfred's but for his size, they were considerably large. Antonio stood up, grin on his face and shoulders back. He could 'prove' himself to Feliciano. He would protect his Romano and keep him from any harm.

Feliciano gracefully strode around from the back of his desk. Antonio fell into step beside him as the pair approached the door. Feliciano silently opened the door and left it open wide for Antonio to slide through. Antonio closed the door as Feliciano requested and followed him to a small empty room on the second floor.

"Romano's room is the last on the right. Do not bother him yet; I must speak with him. You have a task anyway. Mattie should have chained Francis in the basement. Your job is to fill the bucket in the basement with water from the sink and make him drink it. You are not allowed to let him refuse it; he must drink it." Feliciano told him, staring into Antonio's eyes, searching for any signs of doubt. Antonio smirked and nodded.

"As you wish." he said. He and Feliciano walked in stride down the hallway until Feliciano turned to go into Romano's room. As Antonio walked past, he bit his lip. He prayed that he didn't get Romano in trouble in any way.

He doubted Feliciano could hurt his brother for that reason but he didn't want any harm to come upon his little tomato.

Feliciano pushed the door to Romano's room open and peered inside. He scanned the room with a quick eye. The room was mostly empty as Romano hadn't brought any personal objects other than his clothes. He quickly spotted his fratello sitting on his bed. His back was propped against the bed and he had a book spread open across his lap. His eyebrows were knitted together and his golden eyes quickly scanned the crisp pages. His thumb sat just above the top corner of the page, ready to turn when he reached the end of his page.

Feliciano cleared his throat and Romano's head snaps up. Feliciano chuckled, curious to see if Romano knew about the Spaniard. Romano relaxed and smirked up at his brother. He slid his book mark into place and shut the book.

"Hey Feli." he greeted his brother casually. Maybe he hadn't known of the Spaniards alliance with them. Nether the less, he hadn't done his job properly and he must be punished.

Before Romano had any time to see it coming, Feliciano slapped his face, sending him reeling back into the bed. Tears sprung to the corners of Romano's eyes and a hand reached up to gingerly touch his red cheek. Confusion, betrayal and fear illuminated his golden eyes. Feliciano's lips curled back in a snarl.

"You told me the Spanish bastard was dead!" Feliciano snapped at him angrily. Romano seemed to break out in a nervous sweat. Feliciano grinned. He must really believe that he would kill his own brother. If Romano thought it, who was just an ally, then his enemies must know it too.

"H-he was dead!" Romano stammered. His voice was laced with fear and perhaps uncertainty, "He was dead! I know he was!"

"He obviously isn't. He asked to join us as an ally?" Feliciano spat at him calmly. He never raised his voice to Romano, his tone said it all and his eyes reinforced his words. Romano started to tremble out of fear.

"H-he did? W-what d-did you say?" he asked quietly. Feliciano rolled his eye at how weak he sounded.

"Calm down. I'm not going to hurt you anymore," he coldly retorted, "I told him that he was on probation. If anyone suspects that he is disloyal or using us, he will be killed."

Romano was silent. He bit his lip and glanced away. Feliciano could see a thousand different thoughts swimming in his mind. He found himself wondering what he was thinking. Did he speak to quickly? His brother did only make a mistake. The Spaniard had hurt his older brother and he had let him join them without even discussing it with Romano. Romano was still his brother and had wanted to help his younger brother so passionately. He had been brave and fought past his injuries and learned to fight. He pushed past his fears just for Feliciano. Shouldn't he be more trusting of him?

"Do you not want him apart of our alliance?" he asked. His tone was much softer though still hard. He couldn't allow himself to get that relaxed around anyone. No matter what his heart said, his brain told him that he could only trust himself.

Romano relaxed more at the softening of Feliciano's voice. He looked back and shook his head. "No." he whispered silently.

Feliciano waited, expecting him to continue. When he didn't, he spoke up, "Fine. He can stay but as soon as you want him gone, I will dispose of him myself."

Romano nodded quickly. His hand fell away from his still red cheek. Feliciano could see an imprint of a hand in his skin.

Did I really slap him that hard?

Feliciano rewarded him with a pat on the opposite cheek. "Sorry about that fratello."

Romano flinched away from his touch but relaxed when he was not struck. He just nodded at Feliciano. Feliciano was not bothered by it as he usually would. He understood Romano's position. He would be confused as well if their roles had been reversed and it had been Ludwig who asked to be his ally and spoke as passionately as the Spaniard did. Then again, he should know that could never happen. Ludwig never cared about him and could never speak like that. Antonio could. He was the country of passion. Ludwig was just emotionless and uncaring. He was done getting his hopes raised for Ludwig. He was only ever disappointed.

Feliciano forced a chuckle and went to the door. "Antonio's room is the old storage room down the hall. You can't miss it." he told him. Romano looked up and nodded. Feliciano couldn't bear to see his red cheek or see those golden eyes of his. He quickly turned on his heels and left the room, closing the door behind him and leaving Romano to himself more confused than he ever had been before.

Maybe my plans weren't the way to go...Maybe I still do have feelings for Ludwig. What am I talking about? I hate that bastard. He deserves what's coming for him… and I'm looking forward to watching him beg for mercy.

A/N: Sorry for waiting so long guys. I've had a major case of writers block. I worked really hard on his chapter and I'd appreciate some reviews. I'd love to see suggestions or how you think the story is going so far. Thank you!


	29. Chapter 29

Lost. Chapter 29.

Thank you to The-Last-Dragon (On dA) for beta-ing this chapter for me! :D

~/~

Antonio had easily located the basement as Feliciano had ordered him to do. Unlike what he had though, the door looked completely normal. He had been expecting a big metal door with a skull and crossbones on the front. He opened the door and peered down the dark flight of stairs descending into a pitch black room. Antonio gulped and carefully descended the stairs. He was terrified at what he might find but it frightened him to think that Francis was down here, all alone and possibly wounded. He was horrified of what condition he might find his friend in. He was afraid of the basement already and he wasn't even the one who was captured. He knew that if he was in Francis' position, he would be petrified.

He reached the bottom of the stairs. At last, the eerie creaks stopped and silence filled the cold room. The Spaniard's heart was hammering in his throat. He felt sick to his stomach with dread and fear. Despite the damp, cool temperatures, sweat rolled down his forehead. He stuck his arms out and felt around the wall for a light switch, as his eyes have not yet adjusted to the choking darkness. He flipped the switch and a single light bulb in the middle of the large room, lit up. The dim light spread across the room, the edges of the room still hidden by shadows. Antonio gulped yet again at the atmosphere of the room. He stepped into the room, looking for his friend.

Whoever had owned this house must have used the basement as a spare room. The bucket that Feliciano had mentioned earlier stood on the floor idly by a sink and cabinet. Antonio bent to pick the bucket up and quickly covered his mouth as a rank stench filled his nose. He remembered what his task was and he suddenly dreaded it. He was supposed to fill the bucket with water and make Francis drink from it. He decided he could try washing it out and see if that would eliminate some of the stench. He brought the bucket over to the sink and washed it out a couple times. When he was finished, the bucket still stank but compared to earlier, it was much cleaner.

Antonio filled part of the bucket with water and looked around for Francis. He had heard no noises other than the noises he had made. He was starting to doubt that Francis was in the room. The single bulb didn't provide enough light to reach the sides so Francis was probably on the outside of the room. Putting the bucket down, Antonio went to search for Francis, not held down by the buckets.

When the Spaniard finally found the Frenchman, he was horrified to see him. His friend was chained to the wall with his arms above his head like a person in a medieval dungeon. His head hung down over his chest and his blond locks covered his eyes limply. Everything about the Frenchman suggested that he was weak and had no hope. Antonio's heart broke to see his friend in such a condition. He gently crouched down in front of Francis. He hesitated for a moment, looking at his face, half hidden by his hair. Gentle hands cupped both of the Frenchman's face gently and tilted his head up.

"Francis?" Antonio asked softly. He patted his cheek softly, not wanting to startle him awake. The Frenchman's eyes cracked open. His usual bright blue eyes looked dull and empty. He blinked them a few times before his gaze rested on Antonio. His eyebrows furrowed together slightly in confusion. He had been expecting to see Feliciano or one of the guards in front of them; smirking at God knows what they were going to do to him. He was surprised to see Antonio and wondered what he was doing in this God forsaken place.

"Toni?" he croaked, his throat dry. Antonio smiled gently and nodded at the man.

"Si, Francis. It's me." Antonio murmured quietly. He removed his hands from his friend's face who smiled slightly at him. "I'm pretending to be on their side."

Francis frowned lightly. "Why? Isn't Romano already doing that?" he asked confused. Part of him was suddenly concerned for the older Italian but then the other part of him knew that if anything had happened to him, Antonio would not be so calm. Antonio nodded wholeheartedly.

"Si, si! I was just worried for my tomato." He explained. He appeared to be off in some other place for a moment at the mention of the Italian. Francis wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not but he didn't want to pull him away. Antonio blinked quickly, snapping out of his thoughts. He frowned quietly. "Lo siento, mi amigo but Feliciano has ordered me to make sure you drink."

"Why are you apologizing?" Francis asked confused. Isn't drinking water a good thing? He was extremely thirsty and his throat was scratchy. Antonio frowned, which was becoming more and more common to see on his usual cheery face.

"You'll see soon enough." He explained. He got to his feet and retrieved the bucket. Francis' face wrinkled at the odor when Antonio set the bucket down nearby.

"Oui, I do see what you mean now." He muttered. Antonio frowned and nodded quietly. He brought the bucket to Francis' lips and tilted it until the water was able to be poured into his mouth, small amounts at a time. Despite the smell, Francis drank thirstily though he would shiver in disgust whenever he was finished swallowing. Antonio smiled sympathetically for the man. He could see he hated the water, yet he was desperate enough to drink it. He wanted to get the man out of here so bad. It could be so easy; all he had was get him out of the chains somehow and sneak him out of the house. Yet he knew that would completely blow his cover and get him and possibly Romano killed which he could never ever risk.

On a more realistic matter, he could see the Frenchman had so many questions swimming around in his head that he wanted to ask the Spaniard. He waited until he was finished with the water and looked into the Spaniard's green eyes with such a confused and almost hesitant look that Antonio felt so bad for him.

"The Bad Touch Trio will be back together soon enough." Antonio told him gently. Francis chuckled ever so slightly, the earlier look in his eyes fading. His blue eyes lit up momentarily at the thought of Antonio, Gilbert and himself being able to laugh and get drunk and do dumb things like they used to.

"Do you remember those days?" he asked, hopefully. He liked this Antonio just fine; he acted pretty much the same and was still as considerate. But it still wasn't their Antonio and he didn't have his memories. He wanted to know his friend was ok. He knew the Spaniard was frustrated with his lack of memory; he wanted to remember his friends, the good old days and most importantly, he wanted to remember his Lovino.

Antonio frowned. He considered lying to the Frenchman just to make him happy but he didn't have the heart to do so. He deserved to know the truth for one small little thing in this place of secrets and lies. He shook his head sadly, "No. Lo siento."

Francis frowned but pressed a small smile to his face in hopes of cheering the Spaniard up. All of the events were starting to take its toll on all of the countries. Francis still had a question burning on his mind. He hesitated, wondering if it would be insensitive of him but deciding that it would change the subject to something maybe not as personal to the Spaniard.

"How is Arthur? He isn't hurt is he?" Francis asked, his voice barely a whisper. Antonio knew it must have been torture for him to be locked up in this place so far away from Arthur. The poor Brit had been heartbroken and a shell of his former self ever since Alfred's death. The Frenchman had been his safe haven in his hell. Without the Frenchman, he was much more miserable and broken. The way they both cared about each other reminded Antonio of himself and Romano.

A kind smile tugged at Antonio's lips. He wanted to put the Frenchman's worries at ease, "Arthur is safe and unharmed," Antonio told Francis who relaxed at his words. It was nice to hear good news for a change, "He is only worried for you. He has been devastated since you were taken, but he will be ok until you get back; he will wait for you. He can't stand the thought that you might be dead."

Francis looked up at the Spaniard. His blue eyes got a spark back into him and his mouth curved upwards ever so slightly. "Really?" he asked. He looked much more lively then he had been when Antonio first saw him.

Antonio nodded enthusiastically. "Si! Si! He is very worried for you and has done nothing but think about you and worry about you." He told the Frenchman with a smile. Francis' eyes softened at the thought of the Englishman and he smiled longingly. He wished he could be with him now. He wanted to be able to wrap his arms around the Brit and pull him close and tell him without doubt that everything would be alright. Yet he couldn't do any of that. He was stuck in this pit, probably many miles apart, and he couldn't promise the Brit that things would be ok when they both knew that they wouldn't.

"I wish I could be with him now…" he sighed quietly. Antonio frowned and patted his friend's shoulder. They all had things they wanted to do and people they wanted to see but both were trapped in their own prison in some way.

"I know, my friend, I know." Antonio sighed sympathetically, "I'll try to get you out of here soon so you can go back and see Arthur." He hoped the Frenchman understood just how much he was missed. If only Arthur was here. He would be able to make Francis so much happier and hopeful.

A silence stretched out between them, both men lost in their own thoughts and fantasies; Francis holding Arthur close and Antonio taking Lovino far away from the emotional torture. The events that led up to everything seemed to hold them back and the events that were to come seemed to loom over their heads dangerously. After what seems like an eternity but was only a few minutes, Francis looked over at Antonio.

"How is everyone else? Did anyone get hurt?" he asked, dreading the answer. It seemed unlikely that he would be the only one hurt. Feliciano had his plot all carefully planned out; he wouldn't just execute a plan like that without having something else planned other than capturing Francis.

Antonio frowned and sighed quietly. He was dreading to tell the blond about the other events. "I don't know how much you know from when you were kidnapped but that raid was successful in capturing you and killing Ivan." Antonio continued to share the details with Francis, his eyes widening with each new detail. Neither of them knew about the horrifying plane crash. The news of the raid alone was enough to leave them both silent in shock. Their two biggest allies were now dead. Both had died so easily that it was nearly unreal.

Antonio realized how long he had been down in the basement and sighed. It was horrible timing after the discussion of the Russians death but he was on probation; he didn't want to give Feliciano a hint to what his real plan was. He sighed quietly and looked at Francis apologetically, "Lo siento, but I have to go."

Francis nodded understandingly and gave the Spaniard a weakly smile. "Thank you for the water and the company."

Antonio nodded quietly and rose to his feet, taking the bucket with him. "I'll try to come back soon. Just try to hang in there, Francy-pants." He said, hoping the nickname would cheer him up slightly. Francis smiled softly and nodded. Antonio quickly went back to where the bucket was and left it where he found it. He climbed back up the stairs, back into the light. He emerged on the first floor and shut the door again, feeling guilty for leaving him down there once again. Hopefully, he found some peace after hearing of Arthur's safety.

He found his way back upstairs. He wanted to go see his Lovi. He quietly pushed the door open to the Italians room and poked his head inside, a small, affectionate smile covering his face. His emerald eyes shined with excitement as he looked into the room. He felt like he had been separated from the Italian for ages. He was so excited to see him again and see that he was ok. He found Romano sitting on the bed with his back to him. He quietly snuck up behind the Italian. He wrapped his arms around the Italian's slender waist and pulled him close. He buried his head into the crook of the Italians neck. Romano stiffened and jumped up. Antonio's arms fell to his side and he quickly rose to his feet to meet Romano's angry glare.

"What the hell, bastard!" Romano snapped angrily. He tried to glare at the Spaniard but his amber eyes were moist. Antonio froze, his heart skipping a beat when he noticed a red, hand shaped mark on his face.

"Lovi…" he began, his voice quiet. He couldn't pull his gaze away from the Italians cheek. Had Feliciano hit Lovino? When the realization occurred to him, Antonio suddenly felt horrible that it was his fault. Because he had suddenly appeared to help Lovino, he had instead gotten the Italian slapped. And by the looks of it, he had been crying which made him feel horrible. He had seen him cry plenty of times but this time was different. "Lo sie…"

He was cut off by a shove, "How could you try such a stupid idea! You could have ruined the whole plan!" Romano hissed angrily, keeping his voice low as to not cause attention. His voice was choked with emotion as he whispered the next sentence, "You could have gotten yourself killed!" The Italians shoulders were heaving slightly and his face was red with either anger or fear. He could still see the image of Antonio at the bottom of the pool in his vision and it haunted him. Antonio frowned and quickly pulled the Italian into a hug.

His worry quickly escalates when Romano doesn't push back or yell at him like he normally does. Instead, he leaned into his touch and hugged back ever so slightly. Antonio quickly pulled him into an even tighter hug, wrapping his arms around the brunette and brushed the back of his hair softly.

"Shh…Lovino, its ok." He said. They hugged for a few more moments before Antonio pulled back, keeping his hands on Lovino's shoulder. Romano kept his gaze low to the ground. Seeing the Italian like this was painful to see. He wanted his tomato to go back to his normal self; fighting everything and cussing and shoving. He reached out tentatively to stroke his red cheek but when Romano flinched away from his touch, he drew his hand away, "Did he hit you?" he whispered sadly.

Keeping his gaze lowered to the ground, Romano nodded solemnly. Antonio reached up to cup the opposite cheek softly. "Oh Lovi…" he whispered softly. He couldn't stand to see Romano like this. He wanted to see Romano yelling and screaming and throwing a tantrum. Seeing Romano so quiet and frightened is so unlike him. He hated to see the one person who had been strong for him when he needed him so scared. He wanted to be there for him just like Romano was there for him but it was nearly impossible. This wasn't something he could fix by himself. Yet again, Romano hadn't been able to make his memories come back yet he had done so much for him by just being so supportive. He was just hoping that he could maybe make things a little easier to deal with for Romano.

He couldn't help but pull the Italian into another hug. He didn't know what else to do to comfort him. Romano clung to the Spaniards clothing, taking fistfuls of it. Despite wanting to be strong, Romano couldn't stay strong forever. He was too stressed and too worried. He might not show his emotions too often but he cared for his brother a lot more than people would think. He was terrified to think about what would happen to his brother. No one stayed in power for too long; they always fell out of power, often falling even lower than they had been before their power. His brother had been the cause of two countries death, not to mention uncounted civilian deaths. He was so afraid of what would happen to him. Feliciano was his little brother. Everyone might have liked Feliciano more than him but that wasn't Feliciano's fault. He had always tried to be supportive for Romano and would try to help Romano whenever he got into a problem or felt low. Romano wanted to be strong for his brother like he had when he needed him in the past. Feliciano didn't realize it yet, but he needed Romano. Yet Romano couldn't be strong all the time when one of the closest people to him was marching into his own grave.

Sobs started erupting from the Italian at that thought. He hated crying in front of people but he couldn't help it. He had almost lost Antonio and he was probably going to lose Feliciano. He could just imagine Feliciano's tomb stone sticking out from the ground; fresh soil mounted on top and no one but him, Antonio and maybe Ludwig to visit it, though he doubted the German would visit the Italians grave after all of this.

Antonio held the trembling Italian closer to him. He couldn't stand to hear him cry. Romano clung to his shirt and buried his face into the fabric. Antonio wrapped an arm around his back and around the back of his head. He gently cooed to him, "Shh…Lovi, it's ok. It's ok." He whispered. His shirt was quickly soaked with salty tears as Romano sobbed quietly into his shirt.

Romano didn't calm down until a few minutes later. He kept his face buried in Antonio's shirt, ashamed of his tears. "I-I thought that if I showed Feliciano that I was loyal to him, that he would change his mind. I was hoping he would go back to his old self!" he whimpered, his voice thick with tears, "I don't want my sweet, little fratello to die!" He knew his fratello wasn't sweet or little anymore. He was blood thirsty and bigger than Romano had ever been.

Antonio frowned. Feliciano was completely blind by how his plan was eating away at Romano. Yet again, this wasn't the old Feliciano who took other people's feelings into consideration. Feliciano had changed and became someone totally new. But if he had changed into someone bad, he could also change back into the person he used to be, though it would be harder. It was easier to hate then it was to love, "It'll be ok." He murmured softly to him, gently kissing the side of his head. "Feli just needs time to realize what he has done. Feliciano is not completely as heartless as he makes himself out to be. If he wasn't, he wouldn't have let me join. He'll come back eventually and I'm sure we can convince the others to let him go. Just don't give up on him, Lovi."

Romano leaned away eventually and wiped the tears from his eyes angrily. His face was even redder than usual and his face was streaked with tears. Antonio gently took his hand and pulled them away from his face.

"Do not be ashamed of your tears. You have nothing to be ashamed of." He whispered softly, staring into the Italians eyes with an unflinching gaze. He gently reached out and wiped the tears away with a loving hand. Once all the tears were gone, he leaned forward and placed a feather soft kiss on the corners of his eyes. Romano frowned and looked away.

"Yes I do." He murmured quietly, his voice dull. "I need to be strong and be a good big brother to Feliciano for once in my life. He may say he's ok but he needs me more than ever and here I am being a baby and crying." He said angrily to himself, "I'm tired of people taking care of me. I want to save my fratello…even though it's probably too late. He's done horrible things…" he murmured miserably, as if in a daze.

Antonio lightly pulled on his arms and brought him into another hug. "It'll be ok, my tomato." He whispered. Unlike the last times, Romano didn't hug back and his arms hung loosely by his side.

"Please stop…I'm not in the mood anymore." He whispered quietly. There was something about his tone that made Antonio stop right away. He wasn't demanding or begging. He just simply stated in such a way that made Antonio stop right away. He hated to see the Italian in such a state. He complied and pulled away. He gently cupped his cheek, brushing his soft, damp skin with his thumb.

"Lo siento, Lovino." He whispered softly, "You should get some sleep. You'll feel much better."

Romano nodded silently and went to the bed, crawling under the sheets. Seeing the Italian looking so young, curled under the sheets of the bed, pulled at his brain; like déjà vu. He had heard that he had taken care of Romano as a child but seeing him act like this made the memories seem closer. He smiled ever so slightly. He quietly tucked him in, pausing to stroke his dark brown hair lovingly.

"Everything will be ok, Lovi…" he whispered softly as the man closed his eyes "Just don't lose yourself." He bent down to kiss his forehead gently before walking away. He was about to close the door when Romano's voice stopped him.

"Hey bastard…" Romano mumbled quietly. Antonio stopped and looked back curiously. Lovino hesitated for a moment, his golden eyes connecting with the Spaniard's green eyes. Despite his initial anger, he was glad the Spaniard did what he did. It was so much better already with him around. He didn't have to worry about if he was ok in America because he would be beside him the entire time, "Gracias."

Antonio smiled affectionately at the Italian. He knew Romano had a deeper side to him then the anger and irritation he showed on the outside. If only other people made the effort to get to know that side of him and they would surely understand why he adored the Italian more than anyone or thing, "Anything for you, Lovi." He whispered softly, "Anything for you."

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A/N: OMG! I am so sorry for being so late. I wish I had a good reason for you but I really don't. Dx. I'm really sorry to keep you waiting. I reread a few of the reviews and you guys helped me with my writers block so much! Thank you! 3 I hope this chapter is good for you. I spent so much time editing this to make it perfect; I listened to my new Falling In Reverse CD twice. The action is starting to get good from here so please don't give up on me! I don't have the story quite planned out yet but I promise there is a lot more action. And by the way, there are probably going to be another ten maybe fifteen chapters. I'm not sure if I want to do a sequel anymore. I think that would be even longer and on the 29th of this month, I would have been writing this story for a year. 0.0 I've never been into a show for this long and for some reason, it kind of scares me.


	30. Chapter 30

Lost. Chapter 30

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A few days have passed since Antonio was allowed to join the Italians side. It had been pretty much quiet; Feliciano stayed in his office and Antonio was able to spend time with Lovino again.

Antonio was so glad to be able to spend time with Lovino again. He had missed him so much. He could tell the Italian had missed him too. Romano would never admit to missing him but every now and then, the oldest Italian would occasionally let his lips be tugged into a faint smile. It wasn't anything another person would be happy about but every time Antonio saw it, his heart skipped a beat. He was glad that Romano was becoming more cheerful.

Antonio would never tell the Italian this but he didn't think Feliciano's plan would have a very good outcome. He would never tell him that he thought it was a waste of time to try and tempt the old Feliciano out. The old Feliciano was buried deep inside himself and strangled by his new, evil self. He expected this would end with Lovino being forced to place his brother another six feet under. Feliciano had already dug his grave and buried his old self in it.

Antonio felt so bad that he couldn't do more. He felt so hopeless. He wanted to be able to whisk Romano out of this torture. The older Italian hadn't been harmed since the last time Feliciano smacked him but not all pain and torture was physical or on the surface. Both Italy brothers had endured enough pain and torture in their life and even if all Antonio remembered of Feliciano was his evil self, he felt this strange feeling that Feliciano had been a very kind and cheerful person.

Antonio still hadn't regained his memories yet. They felt so close yet they were so far away. He would often get the feeling of déjà vu… like he could stretch his hands out and pull all the memories back. They were always just out of reach. Antonio knew he just had to be patient but it would also take off more of Lovino's stress if his memories would come back.

Antonio and Lovino had been spending much of their time together. Lovino taught Antonio the skills Feliciano had taught him. To the Spaniards surprise, he was very skilled with a sword. Lovino had mentioned something about a pirate and anytime Antonio took up a sword, his feet became quick like a cheetah; his arms quick to strike like a cobra and his movements graceful as a dancer. Sword fighting came to natural to him; it was to relaxing to finally feel like he belonged someplace and was in charge.

Lovino made him feel like he belonged most of the time but he would sometimes drift off or look dazed. He knew the situation must be extremely difficult for the Italian but sometimes he wished the Italian would try more to help the Spaniard. He felt so selfish for wishing that. The Italian had already done so much for him but sometimes he felt like a stranger in his own body; he was Antonio, yet he wasn't. Romano would sometimes treat him as he usually would but other times, he would treat him like he was an intruder or imposter.

It wasn't a big deal if Lovino was harsh or cold to him. He was detached. Antonio was a country of passion, and therefore sensitive. He told himself he was probably overreacting. Romano had a lot to deal with and process… it probably had nothing to do with Antonio's memories.

Feliciano treated him the same every time. Antonio appreciated the consistency, even if it was with something so simple. The younger Italian treated him like a member of the team and gave him the day to day task of giving Francis food and water. It was great since he was able to spend a little time with the Frenchman and keep an eye on him.

Antonio was always trusted to go down alone, so when Feliciano asked Antonio to go down the basement with him, he became confused. Why would Feliciano want to go down with him? Maybe he didn't trust him and he wanted to get him out of the way. Maybe he wanted to test his loyalty. Maybe he wanted to see how Antonio treated Francis. Either way, it terrified him to no end. He could mess this up. Romano was just starting to smile again and relax. He couldn't mess this up...yet he couldn't hurt Francis. He could never hurt his friend. He was so worried, he felt like he was going to get sick.

He followed the younger Italian down the stairs, his heart seeming to lurch with each step. Luckily, the Italian couldn't see how tense he was being in front of him. The Spaniard gulped, preparing himself for the worst and trying to think of a backup plan.

The Italian flipped the switch and the single light bulb flickered to life, sending dull light across the room. He halted and turned shoulder to face the Spaniard. Antonio gulped to see the glint in the younger man's dark eyes. He reached to his waist and Antonio froze, expecting him to pull a gun on him and shoot. Instead, Feliciano pulled out a rolled up whip. Antonio backed up a few steps, fear racing through his body. How had he not noticed the whip?

Feliciano let out an amused chuckle, "Relax, this isn't for you." he smirked. He thrust the whip at the Spaniard which he was just able to catch. He looked down at the worn leather and then looked back up at Feliciano, confusion clear in his eyes.

"It's time to put your loyalty to the ultimate test." Feliciano told him. Antonio blinked and tilted his head slightly. He was even more confused. Did Feliciano expect him to whip Francis? He couldn't hurt his friends! Antonio's eyes dropped down again to the worn handle of the whip. He could end the situation right here and prevent more people from getting hurt. He held so many possibilities in his hand. He knew being whipped could kill a person. He could kill Feliciano and get Francis out of the hell hole. They could make it back to the other countries and begin recovering from Feliciano's break down.

But could he really kill Feliciano? Could he look at his lover's younger brother and watch as he whipped him over and over? Could he listen to the others agonized cries and know that Romano could hear it? Could he destroy his relationship with Lovino?

The last question ended all his other questions. Even if he could stomach killing Feliciano, he could never ever destroy his relationship with Lovino. He would do anything for the older Italian...even whipping his good friend and letting Feliciano's plan continue.

Antonio looked up with determination in his eyes. Not determination to prove his loyalty like Feliciano thought, but determination to stay according to plan and protect Lovino. He gripped the handle so tight that his knuckle turned a pale white. He let the rest of the thin strap of leather to unravel and trail down to the floor.

"How many lashes?" his voice was unreadable, hidden by his mask. Feliciano seemed to smirk at him through the dim lighting.

"Just keep going until I tell you to stop." he instructed the Spaniard. Antonio only nodded in respect and turned his back to Feliciano as he strode to Francis. His footsteps echoed eerily off the walls and reverberated back to him, rattling in his chest. He could feel Feliciano's eyes burning into his back, searing a hole through him. His eyes looked down upon the pitiful Frenchman. Francis woke up as Antonio drew near and blinked up at him in either exhaustion or confusion. Antonio mouthed an apology before halting in front of him.

The Spaniard poised his arm, ready to strike. The look of pure horror and fear when Francis realized what he was going to do would forever be branded into his brain. He closed his eyes as he brought the whip around. The leather easily cut through the air with a loud crack! Francis' cry quickly followed the snap. Antonio wound his arm back again, pausing before whipping him again.

_I have to do this for Lovino! _

Francis cried out in pain as the whip stung his cheek and sliced his skin. Blood started to ooze out of the wound. Antonio wound up again, more quickly this time. He couldn't show hesitation. He kept reminding himself over and over that he had to do this to protect Lovino. The task became easier for him to do and he found himself becoming numb, much to his horror.

_I have to protect Lovi!_

The Spaniard let out a low grunt of effort as he whipped the Frenchmen for the third time. Francis let out another cry, squeezing his eyes shut in pain. His weak limbs strained against his ties, his wrists becoming raw and sore. Antonio repeated and told himself over and over again to keep himself going. He couldn't stop or Feliciano would surly know.

"T-Toni!" Francis begged. He let out another agonized scream as the whip stung his skin, causing his skin to part for the leather. Antonio shut his eyes tightly, no matter how much he told himself it was for Lovino, he couldn't block out his friends screams. It was horrific to hear and even more haunting that he was the one causing his friend pain.

_This is all for Lovino. I must do this to keep Lovino safe. Just a small sacrifice and Lovino will stay safe! I can't lose him again!_

"S-S'il vous plaît..." Francis begged, his voice starting to become weak and thick with desperation. Antonio tried to block it out. He tried to only think of Romano and what they would do when everything ended; he would take the Italian to the park, to the movies, to dinner, to Spain or to any place the Italian desired. He would take him anywhere and everything just because he could.

Luckily, Francis' screams began to fade into the background. If it was because the Frenchman was too weak to scream or because Antonio was too lost in his thoughts, he didn't know which. All he knew was that he had to keep Lovino safe no matter the cost…even if it would someday cost him his own life. He didn't care what he had to do; he would let the world burn if it was to keep his Lovino.

His thoughts were shattered as Feliciano's voice sternly commanded him to stop. Antonio quickly complied, silently sighing that the horrible task was finished. He felt like such a monster. Despite the immense guilt he had felt, he felt numb now. He dropped the whip to the floor and noticed for the first time, since he started the attack, the condition of Francis.

He looked horrible. His thin frame was covered in long gashes caused by the tail of the whip. His face hung in front of his chest, his eyes barely open as he fought to stay conscious. He had several cuts on his face which were weeping with blood. His already dirty, thread bare clothes were now ripped and stained crimson. It was a horrific sight that would also be burned into Antonio's brain. He felt bile rise in his throat. He caused it. He had caused such pain to someone he claimed was his friend. He had been the one to turn into a monster, molded by Feliciano's hands. He was just as bad as the Italian.

Feliciano joined the Spaniards side. He clapped Antonio's shoulder and smiled approvingly at Francis, "Nice job, Antonio. Welcome to the team!"

"Thank you...sir..." Antonio said, his voice neutral. Feliciano didn't seem to care about his tone. Feliciano spat to the side of Francis.

"Worthless, pathetic, fool." he snarled. He turned to Antonio, "Come, come!" he said, smiling happily as if nothing was wrong, "It's time to start putting our final plan into action. We'll need every man we have which includes you and Lovino. I will also be joining you this time."

Antonio nodded, smoothing a pleased smile across his features. Smiling felt like such a dirty thing to do. How could he smile after he whipped one of his best friends and Feliciano was talking of harming and possibly killing more people?

"That is good news. I cannot wait." he said, trying to sound pleased. Feliciano nodded and put a hand on Antonio's shoulder, turning him towards the stairs.

"Si, it is. Now hurry up; I'm starting to get tired of waiting." Feliciano smirked, his copper covered curl bouncing and bobbing in excitement. Antonio's stomach took a sharp dip and plummeted. He followed Feliciano up the stairs; towards their plan to destroy the rest of the countries for 'their' revenge.

_This is all for Lovino. Just remember that Lovino is worth it and I can get through this..._

Antonio thought to himself, though he doubted the words. He knew Lovino was worth it. Lovino was his reason for living. He doubted that they could get through this in one piece. He hated to think of how the event had changed his Lovino. He just hoped he wouldn't lose himself. Luckily they had each other to help them find the way home whenever they lost themselves.

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Within a few hours, all of their allies were sitting at a long, oak table. Felciano took a seat at the head, with Romano close by. Antonio sat down beside Lovino, his stomach doing flips. This was the kind of information they were looking for. Information like this was part of the reason he and Lovino were there for. He had to somehow get in contact with the others and warn them without blowing his cover. It would be a hard task and very crucial but Antonio knew he could do it.

"Friends," Feliciano smirked. The one word alone sent a shiver down Antonio's spine. He had never seen Feliciano look like this. A wide, Cheshire grin stretched from cheek to cheek. His dark eyes were alight with a fire of determination and anticipation. All of his years of planning and suffering and hard work were finally paying off.

Latvia and Estonia wordlessly went to Feliciano. Feliciano pulled away for the table and allowed the two to sit on his lap. Each draped an arm around the Italian and in turn, Feliciano put one arm around their shoulders and pulled them close to him. Antonio looked at Peter from the corner of his eyes but the little nation didn't seem bothered by it.

"This is the day we have been waiting for." Feliciano smirked. "It's time to put our final plan into play. Of course, as I promised you each get to deal with the person who caused your pain and suffering. It must fit within the plans so if you know what you want to do, speak your mind now." Feliciano announced, his hands rubbing circles into the two Baltic's shoulders.

Antonio blinked in surprise as the room was suddenly filled with angry filled shouts. Feliciano smirked at their excitement but didn't try to silence them all. He instead nodded quietly as if he could understand their shouts. He probably could though...he always made sure his allies had a chance at their revenge.

As soon as he raised a hand into the air, the shouts ceased and silence filled the room. Everyone seemed to hold their breaths in anticipation. Feliciano smiled. A smooth chuckle seemed to fill the silent room.

"Alright, once I give you the go ahead, you can all put your plans into action." Feliciano told them. The others seemed pleased with his orders and nodded.

"Now," Feliciano announced, becoming more serious. He leaned back, holding the two Baltic's close, "For our final plan! Listen very closely. It is very important that this goes exactly according to plan."

Everyone, including Antonio and Lovino, paid close attention, their brains becoming sponges to soak up every word uttered from Feliciano's mouth. To all but Antonio and Lovino, Feliciano was their savior. He had picked them up, dusted them off and set them on their feet again. He had given them hope, breathed life back into them. He made sure that all of his allies felt loved and assured that they got their chance to get revenge.

They shared a mutual relationship. Feliciano gave them a sense of security and a chance at revenge while his allies gave him strength and extra hands to put his grand plan into action. The look in Feliciano's eyes sent shivers down Antonio's spine. His eyes were so dark and so hungry for revenge. His lust for blood was clear at the sharp glint in his hard eyes. Antonio knew he had been waiting for his plan to finally be put into action. All his years of careful planning and putting on the facade that he was happy and cheerful were about to pay off...unless Antonio and Romano had something to say about it.

Paying attention was crucial. Antonio and Lovino had to pay close attention to every detail so they could pass it off to their true allies across the ocean. His heart hammered against his chest and he started to sweat. The weight of every else's wellbeing, including his Lovino, fell heavily on his shoulders. To Antonio, it seemed as though all of their fates lay within his and Lovino's hands, and it frightened him more than anything.

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A/N: Wow! Thirty chapters and this story is now a year old as of today! I can't believe it! Thank you so much for all your support! You guys have made me so so happy! Be sure to send in a review! Thanks again to The-Last-Dragon (Or AskLudwigBeilschmidt) on DA for beta-ing this! :D


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N:** I'm gonna start doing the song thing again. XD I found a lot of new music and they seem to fit this in some way, I think. Beta-ed by my awesome friend The-Last-Dragon, or AskLudwigBeilschmidt, on deviantArt! Thanks Luddy. 3

**Disclaimer:** I wouldn't be writing fanfiction if I owned Hetalia now would I?

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_You don't know anything. You don't know anything about me.  
>Once it starts, it never stops.<br>Discipline, it's all I'm not.  
>Can't help myself, you listening?<br>Why can't I say, just what I want?  
>Oooh, you don't know anything. You don't know anything about me.<br>Steady damage! Cross the line!  
>What's become clearly defined?<br>Steady damage! Cross the line!  
>What's become clearly defined?<br>Chain me up, hold me down.  
>Just let me go, there's always more.<br>I want it all, excluding you.  
>Losing control, so construed.<br>Oh, you don't know anything. Noo, you don't know anything about me!  
>Steady damage! Cross the line!<br>What's become clearly defined?_

_Steady damage! Cross the line!  
>What's become clearly defined?<br>Steady damage! Cross the line! All that is done is left behind.  
>Steady damage! Cross the line! You had it all now I got mine.<br>I can't wait to see your face when I make it without you.  
>Nothing seems to go your way, you'll never amount to (shit.)<br>Get away, get away, get away from me. Get away... (You'll never amount to)  
>Get away, get away, get away from me. Get away... You'll never amount to shit!<br>Nooooooo!  
>Steady damage! Cross the line!<br>What's become clearly defined?  
>Steady damage! Cross the line!<br>What's become clearly defined?  
>Steady damage! Cross the line!<br>All that is done is left behind.  
>Steady damage! Cross the line!<br>You got yours now I got mine.  
>You don't know anything.<em>

Lyrics to Damage by Fit For Rivals

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(Germany's POV)

The countries all made their way towards the police station. There was a long silence between them, all of them lost in deep thought. Gilbert walked near the back of the group with Elizabetha. Ludwig was not far in front of them walking with Kiku.

Ludwig was silent in thought. The plane crash was still a huge shock to him. He had almost lost his brother. Despite how cold they acted towards each other, they had a sacred bond that no one could split. Gilbert and Kiku seemed to be all Ludwig had of the old life he loved. The Italian he used to love had taken away so much. He used to wonder if it would be possible for them to ever have the same relationship they had again. It was an obvious question now after all the events that had transpired. He knew they could never be the same. He had lost all his trust for the Italian. He doubted they could still be friends.

And the German hated himself for loving the Italian still and for wanting their old relationship back. He couldn't stand to think that it was normal. Feliciano had been the catalyst of too many deaths. Maybe he didn't kill any of them with his own hand but he had sent the bomb to France which had killed so many people, he had allowed the Baltics to kill Russia. If he hadn't captured Kiku and Ludwig, Alfred would still be alive and god knows if Antonio and Romano are ok. Ludwig doubted that Feliciano would ever hurt his own brother, especially seeing how Feliciano had reacted when Ivan had beat up his fratello. Ludwig hardly knew Feliciano anymore; nobody did. Because of that, Ludwig wouldn't be surprised if Feliciano hurt his own brother.

Ludwig was brought out of his thoughts by his brother's rough, German accented voice, "Oi, why don't we go get some food or do something fun?"

Everyone seemed to pause and look back at him like it was crazy to suggest something fun and normal. None of them have had any time of normality ever since this whole mess started. The thought of doing something fun and normal seemed so abnormal, and disgusting, yet also so tempting.

Gilbert was unphased by their odd looks, "We have about 30-45 minutes to blow. Do you really want to spend it moping around at a police station or do you want to spend it being awesome?" Gilbert asked, flashing his usual grin. He was acting so much like his normal self that it made everyone forget the situation and the horrifying events for the time being.

Kiku was the first to agree, politely nodding his head, "Hai, I agree with Gilbert. We can at least have time to enjoy ourselves."

Everyone slowly warmed up to the idea, nodding their heads in agreement. Gilbert smirked, standing a little taller. It wasn't much but Ludwig noticed his straightened posture. Gilbert was use to hardships. He was a great guy to have around for something like this, as he knows how to think quickly in a pressured situation and knows how to stay positive no matter how hopeless the situation seemed.

"Right! Now let's see what good there is to eat! I don't want to eat at some shitty McDonalds!" Gilbert exclaimed, the normal gleam in his vibrant red eyes returning. Things were starting to seem more and more normal.

"I think I saw a sign for a mall a little ways back," Roderick spoke up, "We can go to the cafeteria and we can all get what we want and go shopping for new clothing."

Mei and Elizabetha seemed brightened at the thought of new clothes and probably a place to buy some make up. They had gone a long time without any of their make up or a change of clothes. The men was also excited but not as excited at the women were. They liked the idea of new clothes to at least make them feel a little cleaner.

They turned back and followed the sign to the nearby mall. They each got food from the cafeteria and indulged on the foot. Even the few that were picky eaters and wouldn't be caught in a place as dirty as the mall cafeteria was eating the food ravenously. After they finished eating to their hearts content, they split into groups based on gender to go shopping. Mei and Elizabetha happily explored the various shops of the mall and finding cheap make up and trying sample perfume from Rue 21.

The men each went and stopped into different stores. Gilbert rushed as fast as his leg would allow into Hot Topic while Roderick looked repulsed to be near a store that was filled with 'barbaric' clothing and blared 'unclean' and 'boisterous' music. Not having enough money to go into a fancier shop, the Austrian was forced to shop at a cheaper store which had casual clothing. He was the only one who looked uncomfortable in his new clothes.

They met up in a short time. They all wished they had more time of freedom but they were expected at the police station in 5 minutes. They complimented each other on their new clothing or commented on how different they looked not wearing their usual type of clothing. They all stopped when they heard a deep male voice shout.

"Stop!" the deep voice shouted. The group turned their head and saw two police men sprinting at them. They didn't think anything of it, as the police men could be running somewhere behind them and they had done nothing wrong. It was only when they go closer that they realized it was the Canadian police.

"Shit!" Gilbert cursed, red eyes widening, "Run!"

Turning on their heels, they all sprinted as fast as they could. Ludwig paused to rip Gilbert off his feet, causing his crutches to clatter to the ground, and carry the smaller man as if he weighed no more than a paper clip. Escaping outside through one of the side doors, they looked around rapidly, looking for a safe place to run to and hide. Some were already panting from running the short distance.

"Shit!" Ludwig spat out gruffly, "We came out the wrong side! The police station is in the opposite direction!"

Hearts pounding in their chest like a countdown, they rapidly searched their mind, "Go to the parking garage and hide in there!" Gilbert explained from Ludwig's arms. Without another room, the small band of refugees sprinted to the parking garage. They found an elevator and quickly loaded. They went to a different floor and got out.

Being temporarily out of danger, they sat on benches, leaned against the walk, and bent over in an attempt to catch their breath, "I think we're safe for now!" Gilbert commented. Ludwig nodded in agreement.

"I say we should try to get to the other side of the mall and get to the police station." Ludwig said. A few nodded their head at their suggestion. After waiting a few more seconds to catch their breath, they resumed their path, walking towards the opposite end of the building at a fast pace.

Gilbert looked around for more Canadian Mounties, as he could do nothing but sit in his brother's strong arms. There were no other Mounties and they made it to the entrance with no difficulty. They slowed to a speedy walk, not wanting to draw too much attention to them. Ludwig set Gilbert down for the same reason and kept an arm on his arm, trying to take some of weight off his injured leg. They didn't see any Mountie until they reached the police station where several Canadian cop cars were. They froze, wondering what to do next.

One of the Mountie glanced out the window and caught sight of them. He said something to their partner and started to hurry out the door. In the blink of an eye, Ludwig whisked Gilbert off his feet again and started sprinting. There was a wooded area across the street which they promptly ran to after avoiding several cars.

Stumbling over roots and ducking under branches and avoiding brambles, the group slowly weaved through the trees as the trees grew closer and closer together, making it harder to get through without earning themselves more scratches on their already tired bodies. The Mounties had caught up and were close behind. It was easy to hear their heavy breathing or their boots crunching twigs and leaves.

A large creek came into view. Ludwig groaned inwardly. If they went along the sides, they would surely get caught eventually. The best chance they had was to go through. "Keep going!" he panted to his friends that were slightly in front of him. He reached the water, quickly switching Gilbert to his back. He trudged through the shallow shore until he was forced to swim as the water became deeper. His clothes became soaked, as well as his brothers, making it impossible for him to swim. He bobbed in the water, trying his best to keep their heads above water. Water filled his mouth and panic began to set in. He thrust his head above, sputtering the water out of his mouth. In the meantime, the current was taking them downstream.

Kiku heard Ludwig's sputtering and swam back to help them. Ludwig shook his head, not wanting his friend to put himself in danger because of him. He realized that if he didn't accept his help, both he and Gilbert could drown, which he wouldn't let happen. He let the Japanese man assist him in helping the older German off of Ludwig's back. Ludwig was able to swim a little easier. Together, Kiku and Ludwig tried to help Gilbert swim across. Gilbert had been trying to swim the entire time but his leg was throbbing and made it difficult.

They were making good progress but unfortunately, the water zapped them of their strength. "The current..." Kiku coughed, spitting the dirty water out of his mouth, "It's too strong!" Ludwig nodded but was determined not to give up. The current swept them down further and further away from their friends on the shore. Gilbert's eyes searched frantically for Elizabetha until he found her, being restrained from going into the water to help from Roderick. He relaxed knowing that the Austrian wouldn't let anything happen to Elizabetha. He concerned himself to his brother and Kiku who were risking their lives to save him. He felt so useless. He could hardly move his leg without pain making him freeze.

Ludwig was concerned with getting his brother and his friend ashore. He couldn't stand the thought of anything happening to either of them. They were all he had left now. He and Gilbert had a sacred bond and he and Kiku had an unbreakable friendship. The thought of losing any of them gave him the strength to swim harder.

It wasn't enough though. As they drifted more downstream, their strength seemed to be carried away from them. Their limbs ached from swimming and their lungs burned from the dirty water. A roar was soon heard, filling their limbs with dread. They craned their necks to see what the source of the noise was. Their stomachs plummeted at the sight of the river speeding up even more along with rocks randomly jutting out of the foamy water. Fear gripped their hearts and they knew that they weren't all going to get out of it ok. Someone was going to be hurt, or even worse.

Too exhausted to speak, they floated helplessly into the rapid water. Ludwig felt a current split him apart from his brother and his friend and he was forced under water. Water filled his nose and his mouth as his body tumbled under water. His back and sides scraped against rocks. His lungs screamed for air but he couldn't tell which way was up or down. He kicked his legs and arms, desperately trying to break to the surface. He felt his fingertips break the surface of the water. He felt hope surge through him, giving him the strength to push his way to the surface.

He gasped and sputtered for air as he pushed above the water. He frantically looked around for his brother, his friend or the shore line. He spotted only the shoreline which he promptly swam to. He used the current to propel his body towards the shore. Once he reached an area where he could stand, he struggled to make it to the sand. Once he was close enough, he collapsed onto the shore, his lower half of his body still in the water. He closed his eyes, exhaustion taking over everything. He panted heavily and began to fall asleep. As his thoughts grew drowsy, he still wondered about his brother and his friend. He prayed that they had been able to do the same as him and was ok.

Sleep was almost upon him when he heard rapid footsteps crunching on the pebbles near the shore. Too exhausted to both to look up, he wondered if it was the Mounties or his friends that had reached the other side. Someone crouched beside him and a gentle pair of hands rolled him onto his back. He groaned lightly in response. One hand rested on his heaving upper chest whilst the other rested on his drenched hair.

"Just relax, Germany." Roderick's voice penetrated his thoughts, shaking him awake. Ludwig opened his eyes weakly and looked around. Violet eyes stated down at him sympathetically.

"W-where..." Ludwig whispered. Roderick frowned more.

"Just relax," he said calmly, "We'll find them. The others are heading downstream to see if they came aside or to see if they can help."

Ludwig nodded weakly and closed his eyes again. He must have fallen asleep for when his eyes shot open, he didn't remember thinking anything.

"I found someone!" Arthur panted as he sprinted over. Roderick nodded and Ludwig tried to stand.

"Ludwig, you need to rest." he said strictly, in the same tone he used to use on a young Italy. Ludwig shook his head in a determined manner.

"No! I need to see them!" he cried desperately. The fear that his brother or friend could be dead was too much to bear and made him sick to the stomach. Roderick seemed to understand and helped the weak German to his feet. His legs trembled and almost gave out but with a few, unsteady steps his legs strengthened enough to walk.

Roderick and Ludwig followed Arthur to where they saw Gilbert laying on the shore, his head in her lap. Fear seized Ludwig's chest but passed quickly when he saw his brother turn his head. Neither brother was too comfortable with emotions or contact, but when Ludwig finally made it to his brother, he half collapsed, half sat beside him, wrapping him in an awkward one armed hug. Gilbert returned it the best he could.

"You idiot! You could have gotten yourself killed!" Gilbert whispered to his younger brother.

"I thought I lost you!" Ludwig gasped. They quickly split from the hug. A weary grin tugged at the Prussians pale lips.

"I'm too awesome to die! You aren't ever going to get rid of me!" he insisted, ruffling Ludwig's wet blond hair.

Both still too tired to carry on the conversation, the brothers sat by each other, equally tired and equally worried for Kiku. They were so thankful that the other was safe. They both had some mild cuts and bruises but they were too worried and exhausted to care. They sat in silence, reminiscing and thinking about their situation. They were uncertain and frightened about what lay ahead for them but they knew they couldn't stop. They had to keep going and try their best to stay positive.

After what seemed like forever, Arthur sprinted over, "We found him!" he said, though his voice had a different tone to it. Fear gripped Ludwig's and Gilbert's hearts. Ludwig unsteadily got to his feet much quicker than before, driven by the need to see his friend. Roderick bent down, taking Gilbert into his arms. Oddly, Gilbert didn't utter a protest, also too worried about Kiku. The Japanese man wouldn't be in this situation if it hadn't been for him. Because of Gilbert's injury, he had hindered his brother and caused the Japanese man to come back and help them.

Elizabetha went to help Ludwig in case he needed it and together, the four of them followed where Arthur went. Kiku had been carried even further downstream. As they approached, the four could hear a girl crying. Hearts pounding and eyes burning, the four finally came upon the spot where Kiku had washed ashore. The smaller man was laid out across the shore, his upper body resting in Mei's lap. The girl was sobbing wildly, enough indication that the Japanese man was dead. His arms had been crossed over his chest and his eyelids closed. His face was deathly pale and his chest was still. Ludwig and Gilbert stood in shock for a while, unable to believe their friend was dead.

"K-Kiku!" Ludwig choked out. Tears sprung to his eyes, his breath came in heavy gasps. He couldn't believe it. Kiku couldn't be dead. He was one of his best friends, now his only best friend now that Feliciano betrayed him. He didn't want to say good bye to him. He didn't want to part with him like this. He wished he could have stopped him or told him what a good friend he had been to him. If Kiku hadn't gone back to help him with Gilbert, he might have gotten across and would still be alive. Ludwig knew it wasn't his or Gilbert's fault. Yes, it could have been prevented but he didn't have the heart to say he regretted his help. If it weren't for him, Gilbert may have died or both of them might have perished in the stream.

Ludwig knew the real person to blame on this was Feliciano. If Feliciano hadn't started the mess, Kiku, Alfred, and Ivan would still be alive. Not to mention the hundreds of people in France who died or were injured in the bomb. It no longer seemed like a shock to them. Their nightmare had become a reality of them. Nearly everyone was too mad at Feliciano and his allies to grant mercy on them.

Ludwig kneeled beside his best friends still body. He remembered all their memories together; training together, fighting as allies together, eating around the Katsu table along with Feliciano, being held prisoner together by Feliciano. If it hadn't been for Kiku, Ludwig surely would have fallen apart. Kiku had helped him deal with the situation even though he too was in the same situation. To think he would never talk, train, eat or simply hang out with Kiku ever again broke his heart.

Bowing his head over Kiku's chest, Ludwig's shoulders wracked with sobs. He clutched his sleeve and cried until he was too exhausted to cry. Gilbert touched the Germans shoulders. Ludwig pulled himself away and looked up. His brothers red eyes were soft and his mouth tilted in a frown. The expression seemed so foreign on his face that it caused another pang of pain to go through him.

"We need to go, Lud. The Mounties will be coming soon." Gilbert said solemnly. He gently squeezed his brother's shoulder. Ludwig nodded and rose to his feet. He looked into his brothers scarlet eyes for a few moments before looking back at Kiku.

"I can walk on my own." Gilbert told him, freeing him to carry Kiku as Mei wasn't strong enough. Mie reluctantly relinquished her brother, allowing Ludwig to pick him up and cradle his cold, limp body to his chest.

The group slowly recollected in silence. Elizabetha joined Gilbert's side, taking his hand and squeezing it. She seemed to notice something that the others didn't as her eyes were found with worry which Gilbert shook off. They made their way further into the trees, leaving the deadly waters behind for the unknown.

~/~

**A/N:** I looked through my story plans and I deleted about six chapters. They just seemed like a lot of fluff and unneeded, cliché action (mostly romantic drama between PruHun and I am trying to keep them in character). Also, I said this was a GerIta story so we're getting closer to that. Trust me, all the failed pairings with Feliciano will make sense in the end, or at least I hope it will. Also, I'm going to be slow posting. School and life has been so hectic. _ Thank you guys for always being so patient and supporting for me. I REALLY appreciate it.


	32. Chapter 32

**Lost. Chapter 32**

**A/N: **I'm really sorry this took so long! I attempted NaNoWriMo and I've gotten so busy with school and RPs and just life in general. I'll try to pick up the pace! The end is in sight!

~/~

_Down you fell, deep into your mind_

_Off to wonderland, leaving what's real behind_

_You're a riddle I can't seem to read_

_Your love a fairytale, too hard to believe_

_Broken and sad as the tarnish on your crown_

_Nowhere to go but down_

_Caught up in yourself, nowhere to be found_

_No other way but down_

_Down, down, down_

_Down, down, down_

_Say your farewell too what's real_

_Like the pain that you feel_

_Welcome to Wonderland (It's dead)_

_Eat me or drink me_

_Seeing is believing_

_Wonderland, baby,_

_It's all in your head_

_Your cup runs over with emptiness_

_Chasing the hare of your innocence_

_Hide behind your cheshire smile_

_Once was vivid, was gray all the while_

_Broken and sad as the tarnish on your crown_

_Nowhere to go but down_

_Caught up in yourself, nowhere to be found_

_No other way but down_

_Down, down, down_

_Down, down, down_

_Say your farewell too what's real_

_Like the pain that you feel_

_Welcome to Wonderland (It's dead)_

_Eat me or drink me_

_Seeing is believing_

_Wonderland, baby,_

_It's all in your head_

Where's My Wonderland? by Blood on the Dance Floor

~/~

They continued to trek on until it grew dark. By the time it was dark, they had found a shelter to hide in that resembled a small cave. They couldn't light a fire in fear that any Mounties would see the glow or the smoke, so they huddled close together to keep warm.

Ludwig had gently set his fallen friend on the cave floor and arranged his body so he was lying on his back with his hands crossed over his chest. Ludwig stayed crouched by his friend, unwilling to leave. Chewing on his lip to keep himself from crying again, he looked down at his friend's pale face. Even in the dimness of the cave, Kiku's face seemed as it was illuminated by the pale moonlight. He seemed as if he was only sleeping; like he could open his eyes at any moment and smile comfortingly at Ludwig.

Ludwig didn't even notice Mei join him as she crouched beside him. She had been crying the entire time, though her sobs had faded to pitiful whimpers. Yao also joined them. Despite their past, Kiku was still his brother. His face was solemn as he put a hand on Mei's shoulder.

"Get some sleep, Mei. We have another long day tomorrow and you'll need your rest, aru." he murmured quietly. Mei didn't seem to hear him. She bowed her head and touched her forehead to Kiku's chest. Her black hair swept around Kiku, blanketing his chest and stomach.

Ludwig didn't say or look at the two. He felt responsible for his friend's death. If only he had been strong enough to swim across on his own, if only he had trained more. If he had, Kiku might still be alive. He couldn't believe it was real. He couldn't believe he had lost both of his best friends. He had also almost lost his brother. If he had lost his brother he didn't know what he would do. He would have lost everyone he was close to.

His thoughts drifted to Feliciano. He knew there was no chance of them ever reinstating their friendship. He didn't want to be friends with the Italian. He had done too much and caused so much death and destruction. Just thinking of the Italian cast a dark shadow over him. He didn't care about trying to save the Italian anymore. It was his fault all of this was happening; it was his fault that Kiku was trapped in his eternal slumber.

Ludwig clenched his hands into fists, trying to control his anger and grief in vain. Jaw clenching and veins protruding, Ludwig thought of all he could do to the Italian. He no longer saw Feliciano as his friend or even a past friend. Feliciano was simply a monster that must be stopped. Plans began to form in Ludwig's head; plans on how he could rid the world of the dark menace that had taken over.

A hand resting on his shoulder halted his thoughts. Ludwig's head snapped up and looked towards the owner of the hand. Roderick glanced down at him, amethyst eyes round with compassion.

"Why don't you come sleep by Gilbert, Elizabetha and I?" he offered. His hand fell off his shoulder and pointed over to where Elizabetha was checking Gilbert to see if he had any new wounds or if any of his older ones had reopened.

Turning back to Kiku's body, Ludwig hesitated. As if sensing his hesitation, Roderick said, "He'll still be here tomorrow. You, however, need to get some sleep."

Ludwig nodded and stood up. He couldn't hide from the facts. As much as he wanted to stay by Kiku for as long as he could, he had to get some sleep and he wanted to sleep by his other friends and his brother. In times like this, who knew how long they would be around?

Ludwig took one last glance at the Japanese man and stood up with a grunt of effort. He felt years older than he actually was. His knees cracked as he stood and his body ached. Roderick led him over to where the Prussian and Hungarian were seated. Scarlet eyes rose to meet Ludwig's blue orbs.

"How're you doing?" Gilbert asked. His voice sounded strained, like he was trying to sound normal but failing. Ludwig looked back at his brother as he sat down. He could tell Gilbert was making an effort to act normal and strong for Ludwig. It was clear though that they were all hurting.

"I'm fine." Ludwig replied, "Are you hurt?" he asked. His eyes scanned his brother's body, searching for something new. All appeared normal, despite how his clothes were still plastered to his body. Ludwig could tell that his already frail looking brother had lost weight.

"I'm awesome," Gilbert smirked at him. The light didn't quite reach his eyes, "Although my awesome new clothes are ruined!"

Ludwig couldn't help but chuckle at his comment, "Sorry to hear about that." he said. His tone sounded tired, despite how he tried to sound energetic.

Gilbert nodded with a yawn, his mouth gaping. Elizabetha chuckled, "Sounds like you're tired." she said. She looked to Ludwig, "You both look tired."

The two brothers nodded, "Ja." they agreed. Gilbert stretched his arms and laid down on the hard cave floor, tentatively moving his leg. His cast had gotten wet in the water and he was trying to be careful.

"I'm going to hit the hay!" he declared. Ludwig, Elizabetha, and Roderick nodded and also settled down to sleep. Gilbert pulled Elizabetha closer to him and closed his eyes. Ludwig settled on his back, staring up at the ceiling. No matter how much he tried, sleep wouldn't come to him. He found the sound of Gilbert's loud snoring to be both a comfort and a hindrance.

Roderick turned over on his side, facing the German country. "Try to get some sleep, Ludwig. There's nothing you can do now but try to get out of this and you can't unless you get some sleep."

Ludwig sighed lightly and closed his eyes, "Ja...I know..." he murmured. He willed himself to go to sleep. He succeeded after an hour.

~/~

They rose early in the morning. With stomachs growling, they rose to their aching feet and began to get ready to leave. There wasn't much to get ready since they didn't have much to carry. Yao offered to carry Kiku first so Ludwig could get some rest and assist Gilbert.

The band of countries all had dark circles around their eyes and their movements were sluggish. They missed how their life used to be; filled with work but relaxing enough. They had a roof over their heads and didn't have to worry about one of their own trying to kill them.

They set out into the woods. They didn't know where they were going, other than that they were going away from danger. Underbrush and roots reached out towards their sluggish feet, making them stumble. Gilbert struggled the most, wincing as his leg stumbled over a root. Ludwig and Elizabetha both took a hold of one of his arms and helped to guide him through the woods.

By the time the sun was at its highest point, the saw a road through the trees.

Yao glanced down at Kiku in his arms, "We have to do something about him. We can't take him with us; we'll get caught for sure, aru." he said.

"What! No!" Mei cried. Her eyes moistened with tears, "W-We can't just bury him here!"

Yao frowned sympathetically, "Mei, we'll come back for him once this is all over and make sure he gets a proper burial. But we need to bury him for now." he explained patiently. He didn't like the idea either but they couldn't risk anyone else's life because they didn't want to bury their friend. The others nodded, even if it was hesitant.

They found a large boulder to bury him by. They began digging with branches they found and with their hands. Ludwig knelt in the dirt and helped. The ground was hard and the digging was hard but they eventually made a hole deep enough. Yao carefully set him in the hole and arranged him as best as he could.

"Good bye, brother. We'll come back for you, I promise." he whispered. They covered the grave as best as they could.

"We'll just have to look for the boulder when we come back." Yao said solemnly. He put a hand on Mei's shoulder to comfort her.

They resumed their journey. Their footsteps picked up pace at the thought of finding somewhere to rest and the possibility of food. They emerged from the forest to stand on the shoulder of the road. Glancing around for a sign, they continued down the road. Eventually, they found a sign that directed them to a town.

They entered the town and could feel their spirits rising already. They quickly joined the others on the streets. Glancing around, they looked at all the people and shops. It was as if things were normal again. Everyone seems oblivious of all the terror and destruction that had plagued them. It was nice to forget about their problems for a while.

They managed to find a small motel and purchased two rooms, since that was all the money they had. Once in the rooms, they all tried to plop on the beds, two single beds in each room. Their group had shrunken considerable since the start of their journey.

They had also lost their confidence. Feliciano seemed so much stronger than them. Their own numbers were steadily shrinking. More nations were dying or betraying them and there was nothing they could do to prevent it. The best they could do at the moment was to take a nap and see if they could find a cheap meal and maybe withdrawal money so they wouldn't be limited on what they could get.

Almost everyone instantly fell asleep once on the bed. It was extremely cramped but in their situation, they didn't mind the crowdedness. All they cared about was that the remaining people in their group stayed safe. The crowdedness was a reminder that they still were together, even if it was just for that moment.

They hadn't intended to sleep as long as they did but they needed the sleep. They woke up when it was dinner time. They had skipped lunch, and their stomachs growled loudly. Their bodies felt so hollow, and not just because they were hungry. They felt sucked of energy and of hope. They hoped a meal could at least fill their empty bellies.

The group made its way down the street. They found a subway where they could get a cheap, quick meal. They sat down at the tables and dug into their sandwiches. The food did wonders for them. Their stomachs were filled and the aching emptiness was satisfied for the moment. They rested back in the seats, taking a moment to relax and enjoy the food they had just eaten.

Eventually, they decided to leave and try to locate a bank. They threw their trash away, having eaten every last crumb from their sandwich. They turned to walk down the side walk of the town. It was a pleasant day out. The sun was beginning to set but it was still comfortable outside. A gentle breeze blew through the street, seeming to promise of good fortune. Tense shoulders relaxed and they felt as though things were normal.

In such a peaceful place, it seemed hard to believe all the horrors they had experienced, how much hardship and death and struggle they had faced. They still faced a bumpy road in front of them but they could relax for a little bit.

Strolling down the road, they looked around the calm street, a small smile grazing their tired features. Even Ludwig and Mei allowed themselves to smile and relax. A cool breeze combed their fingers through their dirty hair, seeming to carry their worries and troubles of the moment away. Ludwig glanced up to the darkening sky and smiled. He imagined that Kiku was watching over them somehow and allowing for them to have a moment of peace after everything. Just thinking of the Japanese man caused his chest to clench in pain. His eyes stung with tears. He felt so exhausted and so unlike his usual self. He had lost two of the closest people to him. All he had was Gilbert now and his brother wasn't exactly in the best state either.

Gilbert was a few feet away with Elizabetha. She was staying close to the snowy haired man in case he tripped over something and fell. Both also looked relax and calm, like they were able to forget about their worries and troubles for a while. They wouldn't be able to stay in the town forever. They had to proceed to WashingtonDC and get assistance with their situation. In their state, they wouldn't be able to fight well enough. Certainly not enough to beat their enemies.

The wind seemed to suddenly change direction. Everyone was too lost in their own thoughts to notice that or anything else that was going on. The town streets became less and less crowded as people headed home or went inside shops or restaurants. They were oblivious to everything; too relaxed and content with the peaceful night to notice any of the change.

A pair of boots began to echo behind them, reverberating in the quiet night air. The one pair of boots soon turned into multiple boots. The group continued forward, too lost in their own thoughts and memories to notice as the footsteps steadily grew faster.

"Well, well, well," a familiar voice purred sarcastically. The group immediately froze, all the tension flooding back into their body. Fear, and anger shot up their spines at the voice. Ludwig spun around and saw Feliciano standing behind them. He hadn't seen his former best friend since when he had been kidnapped. Anger swelled in his chest. If it wasn't for the Italian, Kiku would still be alive and all would be well.

"Italy!" Ludwig spat angrily, his blue eyes filling with a fire that hadn't been there in days. His hands clenched, prepared for him to attack, but the Italian looked calm, albeit the smirk ever present on his face.

"I see you haven't forgotten about me, Ludwig." the Italian said casually. His nonchalant attitude angered Ludwig more. He hadn't expected him to look sad, but he would have at least hoped that he wouldn't have acted like it was nothing.

"You-…You're a monster!" Ludwig screeched angrily, his eyes wild with anger, "You killed Kiku!"

For a fraction of a moment, Ludwig thought he saw saddeness in the Italians deep brown eyes. However, as soon as he saw it, it was gone again; replaced by amusement, "Is that so? Well that's a shame. What are you going to do without your friends now? You're all alone." Feliciano smirked in pleasure.

"Why?" Ludwig asked, his anger fading to desperation. He needed to know. So many horrible things had happened; he just wanted to know why. "Why would you do such a thing like this? Kiku never hurt you! He never made fun of you! He was your friend, Italy. He never left you! If you have a problem with me, don't take it out on others. Talk to me and handle it like a man!"

Feliciano's eyes flashed in anger, but he did not move toward his weapon. Ludwig glanced at his felt and withheld a shudder at the vast amounts of knives and guns that adorned his belt. He might not be making a move now, but Ludwig knew he wasn't here for nothing.

"You're a coward, Feliciano! You hide behind your allies and allow them to do all the hard work!" Ludwig yelled, his grief fueling his anger. Images flashed through his head; Alfred's mangled body, Russia's bloody corpse, Japan's pale face, and all the tears and struggle that had resulted from their friends' death, "You say you want your revenge, but you let others get it for you! You may think you're strong, but you're still nothing but a spineless coward!"

"Shut up!" Feliciano screamed at him. His body tensed and his hand slowly inched toward his weapon. Ludwig realized with dread that they hadn't brought his weapons with him. If they had to run, Gilbert wouldn't be able to do it. They had been refreshed but they were still weak. Feliciano and his allies had an advantage over them. They weren't tired and they had weapons.

This wasn't going to end well.

Ludwig forced himself to stand a little straighter. He wasn't going to show his fear to Feliciano; he wasn't going to give him satisfaction anymore. Feliciano's chocolate eyes were dark in rage. Ludwig could see his slim chest sharply rising and falling as Feliciano struggled to stay calm. He knew as well as Ludwig did that if he was too angry, he wouldn't be able to fight as effectively.

"You're going to pay for that, Ludwig! You forget, you're running from me, remember? I control your fate!" Feliciano snapped, his words as sharp as his eyes.

Ludwig frowned, finding himself calming down as he realized that Feliciano was getting angrier and angrier, "You don't control my fate. You don't control anyone's fate. And what are you going to do? You don't think that your 'allies' have already caused us enough pain. Does that make you happy? To know you caused us pain? Just let this be over. You've had your revenge; you've caused enough pain." Ludwig's voice dropped lower. He looked dear straight into the eyes of the man who used to be his best friend and used to hold his heart, "You know you can't win this. Good always triumphs over evil."

Feliciano's face was bright red, "That's where you're wrong!" he snapped loudly. His irate words seemed to bounce off the buildings, "You have not suffered enough pain! You have not suffered the years of bullying and torment that I had to endure! I am strong and I will win!"

Ludwig frowned simply, "Feli," he started out slowly. He noticed the slight change in Feliciano's eyes as he addressed him by his nickname, "You know you can't win this. You saw how it was for me during WWII. You saw how it was for your Grandfather. You can't win this. You can cause damage, but you cannot win this. Do yourself a favor, surrender now. Take your punishment; we're not as cruel as you. You can save yourself from more pain."

"What do you think I'm doing? I wouldn't be doing this if it weren't for you! This is all your fault! Not just you, Germany, but everyone! You deserve everything you got and everything coming to you!" Feliciano screeched. His chocolate brown eyes looked like those of a mad man; wide and wild.

"Feliciano, this has gone far enough. Do you know how many others have endured the same thing? Do you know how many countries are discriminated and beaten? Do you know how many are treated way worse than you ever were? If everyone acted as you have, everyone would be trying to seek revenge, because everyone experiences this in their life. You were just too weak to deal with it; too cowardly to tell us so we could fix it. None of us tried to hurt you, yet you act like we did!" Ludwig told him calmly. He noticed the change in Feliciano's eyes. Something in his words caused him to snap. Feliciano yanked a gun from his belt.

"Shut up!" he yelled. He smirked as Ludwig and several others took a few steps back. "You've tried my temper for too long, Ludwig! You don't understand and I knew you wouldn't! But I'll be generous today to give you a 15 second head start before I start shooting."

Ludwig's eyes widened, "Feliciano, stop! Don't d-"

"One!" Feliciano began. The other countries instantly began scrambling.

"Two!" Ludwig scooped Gilbert into his arms and the group took off towards buildings.

"Three!" They weaved in between the dark, thin alleys, their breaths already coming out as pants.

"Four!" They made it to the edge of the woods and plunged inside.

"Five!" The group weaved between trees, searching for a place to hide or an object to use as a weapon.

Feliciano continued to count down. He smirked to himself, enjoying seeing them run like animals. He signaled to his allies to draw their weapons.

"Thirteen, fourteen...fifteen." he smirked. At his last count, Feliciano and his allies raced after their old friends and allies.

~/~

A/N: Thanks for reading and please review! Thank you again to my amazing beta reader! I'm still considering a sequel so thoughts on that?


	33. Chapter 33

Lost. Chapter 33

A/N: I'm sorry. ;; You guys are all going to hate my by the time this chapter is done. Good news is the GerIta is coming soon. :'D

In the end

As we fade into the night (woah oh oh)

Who will tell the story of your life

In the end

As my soul's laid to rest

What is left of my body

Or am I just a shell

And I have fought

And with flesh and blood I commanded an army

Through it all I have given my heart for a moment of glory

In the end

As we fade into the night (woah oh)

Who will tell the story of your life (woah oh)

And who will remember your last goodbye (woah oh)

Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid

I'm not afraid to die.

Not afraid, I'm not afraid to die

Born a saint

But with every sin I still wanna be holy

I will live again

Who we are

Isn't how we live we are more than our bodies

If I fall I will rise back up and relive my glory

In the end

As we fade into the night (woah oh)

Who will tell the story of your life (woah oh)

And who will remember your last goodbye (woah oh oh)

Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid

I'm not afraid to die

In the end

As we fade into the night (woah oh oh)

Who will tell the story of your life (woah)

And who will remember your last goodbye (woah oh)

Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid

I'm not afraid to die

Who will remember this last goodbye (woah oh oh)

Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid

I'm not afraid to die

Not afraid

I'm not afraid to die

Not afraid

I'm not afraid to die!

In the End by Black Veil Brides

~/~

Feliciano raised a hand up suddenly in front of his allies before they could even set out in pursuit. "Loop around and try to cut them off. I'll pursue alone." he instructed simply. There was no hesitation as his friends nodded and followed his command, with an exception of two.

Lovino and Antonio were frozen in shock. They had sent a message to their 'enemies' that Feliciano would be going to America to follow them. Of course, they hadn't gotten any word back, but the group had seemed surprised to see them. They must have been on the run when the message had arrived, or they weren't in one place long enough to receive said note.

Feliciano turned around and noticed the expression on Lovino and Antonio's faces. "What? Aren't you happy? We have them now!" he asked. A grin graced his lips. He felt happier than he had in ages. His plan was finally coming down. He would soon have his revenge soon.

Lovino bit his lips hesitantly. He didn't know what to say; he had to keep his cover or he and Antonio could be killed. He nodded quickly, "Sí, we're fine. Both of our stomachs hurt; that's all." he explained, his voice timid.

Feliciano raised an eyebrow, "Both of your stomachs hurt?" he asked quizzically.

"S-Sí!" Lovino stammered, "I had too much pasta for dinner and Antonio didn't like the plane ride."

Feliciano hesitated but nodded. Lovino knew he would. Despite how Feliciano acted towards his enemies, he treated his allies well. He believed them because he expected them to believe him in return. It had earned him their loyalty and their trust.

"Now off with you!" Feliciano exclaimed, brown eyes darkening dangerously at the thought of getting his revenge, "Follow the others and do as I said. We'll catch up to them."

Lovino and Antonio nodded, "Sí!" Quickly turning on their heels, they raced away. They could take another shorter way to stay out of sight from their 'allies' and reach the 'enemies' first so they could warn them of Feliciano's plans.

The trees passed them in a blur. Undergrowth grabbed at their feet but nothing could stop them or slow them down. Their breaths came out in short pants, taking in all the air they could. In a short amount of time, their lungs began to burn and their sides began to cramp but not even that could hinder them.

They left behind Feliciano. Lovino's eyes stung with tears, though he justified it as the sharp air making his eyes water. He knew there was no going back. He would have to betray his brother; whatever that would entail. The road ahead was as unknown and dangerous as the forest they were in. Feliciano would no doubt feel betrayed. He would no doubt hate him. But Lovino could take that.

What he couldn't take was if something happened to Feliciano. He couldn't stand if something were to happen to his dear, yet lost, younger brother because of him. He hated the thought that he had been the cause of any of his pain. Sure, Feliciano had started everything and had brought it upon himself, but Lovino didn't want for him to die or get hurt.

Feliciano was his brother, no matter what, and nothing could change that. Nothing could change how Lovino felt about him.

~/~

Feliciano quickly took off after the group after Lovino and Antonio ran away. He took off through the trees, using the speed he was known for. It felt so good to use his speed for something beneficial instead of running away like the coward he had pretended to be.

It was not long before he saw the group come into sight. It seemed as though Gilbert had forced Ludwig to put him down for he was running with Ludwig's help. They were just trailing the group. Adrenaline coursed through Feliciano's blood. His stride lengthened, his pace quickened and his slim legs ate up the distance between them.

"Ludwig!" he shouted. Ludwig immediately tensed. Ludwig came to a stop, as did Feliciano. Ludwig was smart, he knew Feliciano could outrun them and that it would be smarter to stop and save that energy for the fight that was inevitable to arise.

Ludwig slowly turned to face Feliciano, the man he had once though he loved. Pain was prominent and clear in his baby blue eyes. Feliciano smirked to see the look within them. He had longed to see them again. They stood there staring at each other for several minutes. All was still and quiet. Even the birds seemed to have fallen silent.

It was the lull before a fight and Ludwig knew it. He knew Feliciano wasn't going to go this far to give up inches away from what he wanted.

"Feliciano..." he said, a sigh escaping his lips. His eyes glanced down and stared at the ground for a moment before looking up at him. Their eyes met again and Feliciano was surprised by the emotion in his deep orbs. His blue eyes were filled with sadness and regret; something he had not thought he would have received from Ludwig. He thought he would have been blinded by fury. He thought he would have yelled, screamed, begged or pleaded at Feliciano. He had not expected him to sound so sad.

Feliciano felt a slight hesitation. He quickly shook it away. There was no room for hesitation here. That look was all a lie. "Miss me?" Feliciano purred, a smirk curling over his lips.

"Yes..." Ludwig murmured quietly, almost too quiet for Feliciano to hear, "I do miss you, the old Feliciano," Ludwig sighed quietly. He looked up and locked eyes with Feliciano, "The real Feliciano."

Feliciano sighed exasperatedly, "How many times do I have to tell you, this is the real Feliciano." he snapped as one might snap at a naughty kid.

Ludwig looked square into his eyes. Feliciano stared back silently. The German was getting gutsy. "Don't lie to me." he whispered.

Feliciano cocked an eyebrow, "You're accusing me of lying?" he asked curiously. He gazed at the ever serious German curiously. He was still surprised at the regret and remorse that was present in his blue eyes.

"You know what I mean." Ludwig simply stated.

Feliciano shook his head, "I don't. Would you care to explain?" he asked with mock kindness. Ludwig sighed and glanced at Gilbert who was glancing at him concerned. Ludwig turned his attention back to Feliciano.

He sighed, "This isn't you. You may think it is Feliciano, but it's not. You're not..." Ludwig paused trying to think of how to word it carefully. He knew he was stepping on thin ice, but he had to cross that frozen lake to get on the other side.

"Don't you dare try to tell me who or what I am!" Feliciano snapped. "You know nothing about me!" Feliciano could feel his heart beat starting to increase. His blood began to boil in anger again, pulsing under his skin. Ludwig visibly backed off a little, even Gilbert looked surprised by his retaliation.

"Feli..." Ludwig said quietly. Felciano shook with anger. How dare Ludwig try to calm him down? He was the one who had caused him so much pain. He had been so cruel to him; he had yelled at him, scolded him, and ignored him. Ludwig didn't know anything about him, yet he thought he had the right to calm him down.

"No! Don't 'Feli' me! I'm not your 'Feli'; I'm not your Italy. You lost him years ago and you have no right to try and tell me otherwise!" Feliciano yelled at him. Ludwig's eyes filled with dread and fear for a moment. He knew he has made a huge mistake.

Gilbert took Ludwig's arm and whispered something to him that Feliciano could not hear. He frowned as Ludwig's eyes widened. The German whispered back urgently but Gilbert only smiled. He murmured something quietly and Ludwig was frozen.

"Tick tock, Ludwig." Feliciano groaned. "You know how impatient I am."

Ludwig let go of Gilbert's arm, his eyes sad. Gilbert smiled and darkness settled over his scarlet eyes as he turned to face Feliciano.

"Fight me." he stated simply. Feliciano cocked an eyebrow, looking over the Prussians injured leg. It would be an unfair fight and not even Feliciano wanted to do that.

"Che cosa? You have to be kidding?" Feliciano asked. Gilbert shook his head and stood up a little straighter. He was proud and wouldn't back down from a fight, even with his current condition.

"Fight me! You're so ready for a fight; fight me!" Gilbert exclaimed. Feliciano glanced at Ludwig slowly backed away and started running through the trees. Feliciano let him go. His men would already be looping around to cut them off. He smirked and glanced at Gilbert. Sure, he was right. He was ready for a fight but the man was still a cripple.

"You're crippled." Feliciano stated matter of factly.

Gilbert just smirked at him, "And I can still beat you, even as a cripple." he smirked. Thunder rumbled in the distance though neither seemed to notice. Night had fallen up them and they hadn't noticed that. They could just see the outline of each other's bodies, silhouetted by the bright moon.

"You'll need a weapon." Feliciano stated. If he was going to fight him, he was going to do it right.

"You have plenty." Gilbert's gaze drifted down towards Feliciano's belt. Feliciano sighed and unhooked one of his swords. He tossed it at the Prussians feet and drew his own sword. He smirked as the moon light reflected off of the metallic surface.

Gilbert slowly bent down and picked up the sword. Skillfully, he held it in clenched fists. He was skilled with swords, Feliciano knew, but he was confident that he could beat the former knight.

Without a warning, Gilbert rushed towards him with more speed than Feliciano would have expected, given the Prussian's condition. Granted, his movements weren't swift or agile like Feliciano had heard about, but for the injuries he had, he was exceptionally quick. He understood why he had heard so many stories of Gilbert's days as a knight from Ludwig. Whether the German would admit it or not, he looked up to Gilbert and was proud to have him as an older brother.

Feliciano quickly blocked his advance and smirked, "I must say, you're a lot better than I thought you would be." he purred.

Gilbert pushed away from the block, stumbling back a few steps and almost stumbling over a branch. He smirked at Feliciano, his red eyes glistening mischievously. His pale hair and skin made him resemble a ghost by the way it was illuminated by the moon. It was as though Feliciano was fighting a phantom.

Gilbert charged at him again, skillfully not leaving any open spots in his stomach or chest. His sword moved with the speed of a jaguar, cutting through the air. It was as though Feliciano was fighting a lion. Gilbert striked, his claws forward toward Feliciano. The swords hissed as they clashed together. All was silent, albeit the clash of the swords and the heavy breathing of Gilbert.

It was no long before Gilbert began to tire. His leg was clearly bothering him. His movements became more and more sluggish and predictable. His leg restricted how far he could move, not wanting to move more than what was necessary.

Feliciano advanced more, knowing he could use his weakness to his advantage. He stepped closer and closer, using his sword quicker and quicker. Gilbert struggled to keep up. His red eyes narrowed in determination. He wasn't going to back down from a fight. He backed up to keep distance between him and Feliciano but his leg hindered him.

With a gasp, one found his mark on the other. Both men froze; one with a neutral expression, the others face twisted in shock and pain. They glanced down simultaneously at the same spot, both eyes widening in shock at the sight they found.

Felicianos sword had pierced through Gilberts stomach. Already, a dark stain was beginning to grow on the Prussian's shirt as his life's liquid flowed from the wound. His clenched hands released their grip and his sword clattered to the ground. Small drops of rain began to fall from the dark sky. Gilbert's red gaze lifted from his stomach to stare at Feliciano incredulously.

His knees gave way but an arm wrapped itself around his middle, avoiding the sword, before he could hit the ground. A muffled groan escaped Gilbert's pale lips as he leaned against Feliciano. He sagged against his body like a rag doll; his energy and strength seeping out with his blood.

"Y-You fight well..." Gilbert murmured quietly. A cough escaped his lips and he spit up a small dribble of blood onto his pale lips. He was shocked by how advanced the Italians skills were now and by the kindness he was showing him at the moment. Feliciano gently helped Gilbert lay down, being careful to not drop him on the ground. Gilbert looked up at him curiously, wondering why he was showing kindness to him, now of all times.

Gilbert grabbed Feliciano's hand as he went to stand up. His grip was surprisingly strong for a man with a sword in his stomach. He looked into the Italians brown eyes, "Feliciano...I know you're not as cruel as you think you are and Ludwig's not as heartless as you think he is." he weakly said. He took in several breaths to continue, "He still loves you. You might not think it, but he still does. Don't hurt him...please..."

Feliciano looked into Gilbert's red eyes, watching his facial expression as he spoke those words. He was surprised at the firmness in his eyes, despite the fact that his life was slowly ebbing away.

Feliciano tugged his hand from Gilbert's grasp. "If you keep the sword in, you might be able to see Ludwig one more time." he kept his voice leveled as to not give a hint to any of his soft feelings. He picked up the sword Gilbert had abandoned and returned it to its sheath.

He turned back towards the snowy haired man one last time. The pale moonlight made his hair appear to be that of a ghost. Pleading red eyes met deep brown eyes. Feliciano allowed a small smile to grace his features, "I am sorry," he murmured just loud enough for Gilbert to hear. Gilbert had annoyed him in the past but he hadn't done anything to deserve to die other than defend his brother, which Feliciano would have done for his brother if situations were reversed. He was sad to see him finally die; he had survived so much, "It was an honor to fight the Great Prussia."

"Feli..." Gilbert weakly called to him. Feliciano turned away from the dying ex-nation and walked through the trees. He walked at a calm pace. He would at least give Gilbert the opportunity to say good bye to his brother.

As he left Gilbert behind, he felt as though he left part of himself behind. He wasn't devastated by Gilbert's death, though he was oddly sad. Rather, he felt like he left a piece of his anger behind with him. He wasn't satisfied by Gilbert's death. He wasn't satisfied by killing like he thought he would. He hadn't killed anyone with his own hand yet. This was his first taste at blood and he was disappointed. He felt remorseful. He was second guessing himself. He didn't feel as strong or invincible as he thought he would.

He sighed and tried to leave that feeling behind with Gilbert as well. His plan was almost to an end and he would need all of his strength. He couldn't afford to chicken out now. With all he had caused, he could be killed. He would at least be punished for it; that was inevitable.

He still hadn't gotten his revenge yet. Ludwig was there. He couldn't stand how the German would look at him. He still acted like he was the old Feliciano he knew; he acted like he still had hope for Feliciano. Feliciano hated how he would second guess his motives because of Ludwig's fake kindness. There was no way he could still feel that way after what he had done. He was trying to trick him so he could use him once again.

Ludwig wouldn't be so kind to him once he found out about Gilbert. Undoubtedly, he would be furious. He would be devastated. He would hunger for Feliciano's blood to avenge his brother's death. Feliciano frowned at the thought of the Prussian lying on the field. He hoped that someone had found him already. He still knew Ludwig and he knew the German would never leave his brother behind.

Feliciano could wait to ambush him but he wanted to give Gilbert peace with his brother before he passed on. He owed the Prussian that much. He hadn't really meant for the Prussian to die. He had no reason to kill him like the others. Almost everyone else had given him a reason to kill him. Poor Gilbert had been loyal to his brother and had only gotten in Feliciano's way.

Feliciano shook his head to clear his mind. Thoughts like this weren't going to help him complete his task. He would need to stay focused and remember what they had done to him. Gilbert was dying, but it would cause pain to Ludwig. Ludwig would have no one else. Kiku was dead, Feliciano had turned against him, and Gilbert would soon be gone.

Ludwig would have no one in the world for him; no one to keep him from breaking down. Feliciano had destroyed Ludwig without even laying a hand on him since he escaped his base. Ludwig would be vulnerable. He would be too blinded by his anger to think clearly. Feliciano had him on his knees where he wanted him.

Now was the opportune moment to strike.

~/~

A/N: Ahh. I'm sorry. Dx I told you that you would hate me. It's not over yet though, not by a long shot. I estimate at least five more chapters. Please review. Tell me your thoughts, your hopes, your opinion on my writing, whatever you're thinking. Thank you again to my marvelous beta reader The-Last-Dragon on dA or WGDWriter on fanfiction! Grazie!


	34. Chapter 34

**Lost. Chapter 34**

_So long to all of my friends_

_Every one of them met tragic ends_

_With every passing day _

_I'd be lying if I didn't say_

_That I miss them all tonight_

_And if they only knew what I would say_

_If I could be with you tonight_

_I would sing you to sleep_

_Never let them take the light behind your eyes_

_One day I'll lose this fight_

_As we fade in the dark_

_Just remember you will always burn as bright_

_Be strong and hold my hand_

_Time becomes for us, you'll understand_

_We'll say goodbye today _

_And we're sorry how it ends this way_

_If you promise not to cry_

_Then I'll tell you just what I would say_

_If I could be with you tonight_

_I would sing you to sleep_

_Never let them take the light behind your eyes_

_I'll fail and lose this fight_

_Never fade in the dark_

_Just remember you will always burn as bright_

_The light behind your eyes_

_The light behind your_

_Sometimes we must grow stronger and_

_You can't be stronger in the dark_

_When I'm here, no longer_

_You must be stronger and_

_If I could be with you tonight_

_I would sing you to sleep_

_Never let them take the light behind your eyes_

_I failed and lost this fight_

_Never fade in the dark_

_Just remember you will always burn as bright_

The Light Behind Your Eyes by My Chemical Romance

~/~

Ludwig panted as he raced through the trees. His feet stumbled over branches and underbrush and twigs reached out to snatch at his arms but he had to get to his allies ahead of him.

Gilbert's words echoed through his head. "Go ahead and get our allies. I'll stay here and hold Feliciano off." he whispered.

"What? No! With your leg, He'll kill you! Why don't you run ahead?" Ludwig retorted. Gilbert smiled. Ludwig was shocked by his smile. It wasn't his usual smirk. It was a genuine warm, comforting smile.

"You said so yourself, my leg is an issue. I can't run, Ludwig. But that also means that Feliciano won't kill me." he said. Ludwig frowned. Gilbert did have a point.

So he left Gilbert behind. He ran as fast as his tired legs could take him. He had to get to the others quickly. He didn't think Feliciano would hurt Gilbert but there was always that chance. He wanted to get help for his brother as quick as he could so they could get him to safety and to a place where they could all rest.

He soon saw them come into his sight. They all looked exhausted. Trailing near the back was Elizabetha. Ludwig felt his legs move faster, adrenaline pumping through his veins.

"Liz!" he yelled. Liz froze instantly and turned around, her hair blowing around her face. Her wide green eyes seemed to glow from the shadows of her eyes.

"Ludwig!" she exclaimed. Fear visibly seized her when she noticed Gilbert wasn't by his side. Gilbert had also forced her to run ahead. Ludwig was strong enough to help him, any more would be a hindrance, "Where's Gilbert?"

Ludwig stopped, breathing heavily from having to run so fast in order to catch up. He pointed behind him, "He's buying us time but he needs help. Feliciano found us and he's fighting him." Ludwig explained in a rapid voice. Elizabetha nodded and started running towards the direction where Gilbert was without a second thought.

Ludwig turned and followed after her, desperate to get back to his brother before it was too late. Rain drops began to fall from the sky. At first it was just a few drops here or there but the drops soon began to fall quicker. Ludwig and Elizabetha didn't seem to care. The rain drops went unnoticed as they ran towards their brother or lover.

As they neared, at first they didn't see anyone. Once they got close enough they could see a person lying on the ground with a long object protruding their stomach. Ludwig froze and vile rose in his throat. That was either Gilbert or Feliciano lying dead or dying in the field, in the rain, by themselves. The thought of one of them dying out on that field wrenched his heart.

As they neared even closer, they could see a pale silver mop on the persons head. Ludwig chocked out a sob. It was Gilbert. It was his older bruder that was lying in the field all alone. Feliciano really had killed him, and left him to die alone. Ludwig felt as though he was going to be sick. He didn't even care that tears were streaking down his cheeks. He didn't slow down until he reached his brothers side. He dropped down onto his knees, the water on the ground soaking his pants. He didn't care though; Gilbert was dying.

"Gil..." he whispered. He didn't know what to do. His hands trembled as he reached down. He carefully picked up Gilbert's body and rested it on his lap, cradling him close.

"Lud..." a hoarse voice croaked. Gilbert blinked his eyes open, squinting against the rain. Ludwig leaned over him, trying to shield him from the rain. A weak smile graced Gilbert's features.

Ludwig bit his lip to hold back more sobs as he looked at his brother. Even inches away from deaths grip, he was still trying to smile. Ludwig's eyes grazed over his body. Disheveled hair; colorless, almost transparent, skin; dull red eyes; dark, sunken eye sockets; chest weakly rising and falling; and, worst of all, the dark red stain around his stomach. Ludwig's hand trembled as he felt the sword, Feliciano's sword. He wanted to remove the foreign object from his brother's body, but he didn't want to cause him anymore pain.

"Just hang in there," Ludwig whispered softly, gently rocking him. Gilbert's body already felt so cold; as though death had already claimed him. Elizabetha must have thought the same thing for she crouched down opposite of Ludwig and spread her jacket over Gilbert as best as she could. Gilbert turned his head to look at her, a small smile gracing his features.

"We'll get you out of here." Elizabetha murmured, her voice choked with tears. Gilbert reached up and gently cupped her cheek. Elizabetha rested her hand over his and stroked his hand with her thumb.

"It's no use." Gilbert smiled weakly. He looked up at his lover, struggling to find the words to express what he needed to say, "I'm not a nation anymore."

Elizabetha looked confused, "I know that, Gil. What do you mean to say?"

"I can't heal at the rate I used to. I'm a human now and..." he couldn't make himself finish. He didn't want to see that look in their eyes as he told them that there was no way he could survive this wound. It was too severe.

It took several moments for the information to sink into Eliazabetha and Ludwig's head. Ludwig's chest tightened, and so did his grip on Gilbert. The Prussian turned his head towards his brother and smirked.

"It'll be alright though, Lud." Gilbert whispered. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to hold on longer. He wanted to make sure he said everything that he wanted to say. He didn't want to leave Ludwig to be alone in the world. He knew his words would have more weight on them now than they ever did before.

Ludwig shook his head, his salty tears mixing with the rain, "Nein!" he managed to get out, "D-Don't leave, bruder!"

Gilbert smiled sympathetically. He took Ludwig's hand with his free hand and squeezed it, "You know I wouldn't leave if I didn't have to," he whispered, "But you're strong and Feliciano is getting weak. I know you can win this."

Ludwig frowned and squeezed his hand gently. He didn't want to let his hand go. If he did, he thought as though he would lose Gilbert along with it. He wasn't ready to say goodbye yet. He would never be ready to say good bye to his brother. "What do you mean? Feliciano has us cornered and unprepared!"

Gilbert smiled and shook his head, "No. That's what he just wants you to believe. He was different, Ludwig; he reminded me of the old Feliciano. He looked just as shocked as I felt when he...did this. He caught me and gently set me down. He didn't finish me off so I could talk to you and Elizabetha one last time, and that's why he's not attacking now." he sighed and closed his eyes again, drawing forth the last of his energy, "He apologized to me. Ludwig, you can get him back, I know you can and I want you to. The thought of you being alone when I'm gone kills me. I want you to have your friend back, and I know you want him back too."

Ludwig shook his head firmly, "No! Gilbert, look what he did to you! Look what he did to Kiku, and Alfred, and Ivan, and France. He is a monster and this can't go unpunished." Ludwig growled.

Gilbert frowned, "Lud, you can punish him and still be friends. Didn't he still want to be friends with you after WWII? Didn't he want to stay with you when you were a monster? People change, Ludwig. You know this better than everyone; he didn't give up on you."

Ludwig closed his eyes tightly, so many different emotions rushing through his brain, so many thoughts clouding his mind. He just wanted things to go back to normal. He just wanted things to go back to the way they were, with Kiku and Ivan and Alfred and Gilbert being well. He wanted Feliciano to be his friend again, but he wasn't ready to forgive the Italian for what he did. At least not yet.

Gilbert sighed quietly, "You'll understand when this is all over..." he said. He turned to Elizabetha, his red eyes gazing at the woman he had fallen in love with, "Liz...Ich liebe dich. You're one crazy woman, but you're my crazy woman."

Elizabetha smiled bitterly, tears rushing from her love filled eyes. She caressed his cheek lovingly, wanting to make the moment last, knowing this would be their last moments together, "I love you too, Gil. You're a crazy bastard, but I love you."

Gilbert smiled, "You weren't perfect either." he teased. He grew serious again. He didn't like being so serious but he didn't have the strength to joke around anymore. He felt devoid of any energy, "I want you to be happy as well. There are a lot of good men out there who deserve your love. Find one of them and be happy...even though they won't be as awesome as me."

Elizabeth's knew better than to argue, though she couldn't help but smile at his comment. They had argued so much in the past; in Gilbert's last moments, there was no time to argue. She wanted him to have peace of mind knowing she would be ok when he died. Gilbert blinked his red eye at her. She had never seen such a softness in them; such a loving look in his scarlet eye. It hurt her to see that look. It wasn't the Gilbert she knew. This Gilbert, lying as he was dying in his brother arms, was different then her Gilbert, even though it was her Gilbert.

An affectionate smile tugged at the corner of her lips. She bent down and gently pressed their lips together. They kissed softly for a few moments; both of them trying to enjoy the moment for as long as they could. They tried to convey all the love they felt for the other. She pulled away, gently taking his hand and bringing it to her lips. "I love you, Gil..." she whispered, her voice getting choked up.

"I love you too, Liz. So much..." he whispered. He turned his gaze to Ludwig. "I'll see you around, little bruder. Keep my lady safe, won't you?" he asked.

Ludwig nodded stiffly, squeezing his brother's hand tightly. "Ja...I'll do that, Gil. Don't you worry."

Gilbert smiled and turned to rest back in his brother's arms. He sighed contently and closed his eyes. "Danke..." he whispered. He looked completely relaxed, like he didn't have a sword in his stomach… Almost as if he was just taking a nap instead of dying. "I'm coming, Fritz..."

All was silent for those moments. Elizabetha and Ludwig watched the albino man intently, barely able to hold in their sobs. They watched helplessly as his chest slowed until it finally stilled and his breath stopped along with it. It was only then that they allowed their sobs to break through.

"Gil?" Ludwig cried. He couldn't accept it. He didn't want to accept it. Gilbert was the last person he had. Sure, there was Elizabetha and Roderick, but he wasn't close to them like he had been close to Feliciano, Kiku and Gilbert. With the death of his brother, he felt truly alone in the world. He felt as though he had hit rock bottom; like he had no more will to fight.

He could hear Elizabetha sobbing. He thought of his last promise to Gilbert. He regrettably set Gilbert's body down. He moved so he was beside Elizabetha and wrapped his strong arms around her. She leaned her head into his shoulders and wrapped her arms around Ludwig's back, sobbing for the man she had lost. Both the German and the Hungarian cried together, not holding back their sorrow or their grief. They had both lost someone very important to them. They didn't care about concealing their grief.

Gilbert's death marked the end. It was the end, not only of Gilbert's life, but with their last threads of hesitancy. Feliciano had taken something very dear from them all. He had hurt everyone, in some shape or form. Feliciano had caused so much damage in such a short amount of time. It seemed like only a short bit ago, everything was fine. Ludwig and Feliciano and Kiku were best friends, Gilbert tried to annoy everyone and pestered his friends, Alfred, Arthur and Francis would argue together, Russia would unknowingly intimidate everyone and Yao would be drinking his tea peacefully. So much had changed since then it was almost hard to believe.

Ludwig struggled with Gilbert's words. His brother had been adamant about Ludwig learning to eventually forgive the Italian, but Feliciano had taken everyone he held dear from him. Gilbert did have a point though; Feliciano wanted to be friends with Ludwig, even though he had been a monster. He may have been forced to leave for the allies, but he had returned and never treated Ludwig any differently.

Ludwig didn't know what to do. He felt so helpless. He couldn't even save his own brother. He had watched helplessly as his brother's life ebbed away from him. He had watched helplessly as his guardian, his crazy, older brother, his drinking buddy, and his mentor died in his arms. He remembered all the things they did together; all the wars they fought, all the drinks they shared, all the hang overs they put up with and all the tough times they endured.

He remembered the day Fritz died. He had never seen his brother so emotional. That day, his brother shed a single tear and smiled bittersweet. He didn't leave Fritz's side until after he was buried, and even then he stayed by his grave often. His brother was loyal. He might goof off, but when it came to war, Gilbert was a good man to have as an ally.

Eventually, their cries subsided. Ludwig pulled away from Elizabetha and turned to Gilbert's soaked corpse. He winced at how weak and frail he was. Their situation had taken its toll on his fiery older brother. His body was frail, lacking in muscle that he had once had, his eye was covered in a dirty bandage from the explosion in the plane, his leg was still in a cast from the plane crushing his knee, and worst of all, the fatal wound in his stomach that was surrounded by a dark stain of scarlet; scarlet to match the color of his eyes.

Seeing his brother's body in this condition was painful. He had failed at keeping him safe. He had failed as a brother when his brother had never failed him. He heard a rustle of underbrush and spun around to see Roderick stepping into the clearing. Ludwig relaxed, seeing as it wasn't one of their enemies.

"Roderick..." he murmured quietly, just barely audible over the rain. The Austrians amethyst eyes fell on the Prussian and widened with horror. He froze at the sight of his friend so still. He stood still for a few moments before hesitantly walking forward.

"Gilbert..." he whispered quietly. He too dropped to his knees in front of the Prussian. The Prussian might have irritated him over the years but he had been his friend. Gilbert had always been there. Not having him in his life was going to be difficult to think about. It was nearly impossible.

He bowed his head over his friend's body and murmured a prayer quietly. The three stood there in silence for a few moments before they heard more noise through the underbrush. Roderick tensed, turning around to look through the brush. Ludwig and Elizabetha hesitantly rose to their feet, not wanting to leave Gilbert. Three pairs of eyes were glued to the dark trees in front of them.

"Who's there?" Ludwig snapped angrily. He kept his eyes trained on the underbrush. He didn't have a good feeling. He knew Feliciano wasn't going to back down now. This was going to end tonight; Feliciano could achieve what he started the war for, or he could lose everything he had spent years planning. Ludwig had a sick feeling in his stomach and he didn't know why.

Lovino and Antonio burst through the trees. They were breathing heavily from running so fast for so long. They instantly found Ludwig, Elizabetha and Roderick. They hurried over to them. Antonio's eyes widened with shock to see his best friend dead. He stumbled to his knees by Gilbert's side and looked at his friend with a look of grief. If he had been sooner, he might have been able to save him. He began crying and bowed his head over him.

Lovino stopped in front of Ludwig. A look of sadness and regret filled his eyes as he heard his lover's sobs. "Feli..." he panted, breathless from running, "He's coming...he's come to fight. He wants to end it all."

Ludwig had expected as much. He nodded silently, not trusting his voice. Lovino continued, "Where are the others? You'll need everyone you can get. Antonio and I will be joining you though, so you should have a little bit of an advantage. Plus, we have some extra weapons."

None of them had noticed the Northern Italian silently step into the clearing until his voice rang through the air. "Fratello?" he exclaimed.

For a brief moment, Ludwig saw fear and dread fill Lovino's eyes. He spun around, facing his brother. "F-Feliciano!" he stammered.

Feliciano's eyes darkened dangerously. He took a menacing step forward. Despite the anger in his eyes, he could not completely cover the pain of his brother's betrayal in his eyes. "What are you doing? You're not betraying me are you? Your own brother?"

Lovino was frozen in fear. He had felt a fraction of Feliciano's wrath but he knew what he was capable of. "I-I..." he stammered.

"How could you? I thought you actually cared!" Feliciano snapped at his brother. He took another step closer. Lovino took a step back, despite how Feliciano was on the other side of the clearing. He bumped into Ludwig, but he didn't seem to care, "I helped you, Fratello! I took care of you when you were hurt, I helped you grow strong. I thought you actually cared about me, but you betray me? And to the one who hurt me the most, nonetheless! How could you?"

Ludwig could see Gilbert's words becoming true. He could see the spots of Feliciano's rough outer exterior falling away, leaving his real emotions vulnerable. He felt hope for the first time in ages. Feliciano couldn't fight in this condition. He would surely mess up.

"Feliciano, let me explain..." Lovino began. Feliciano immediately cut him off.

"No! I gave you a chance. I gave you multiple chances! You've chosen your side. It's time you all faced your punishment!" he bellowed angrily.

Before anyone could say anything, Feliciano's allies began to step out of the clearing. One by one, they all showed up until they all stood across from Ludwig and his allies. They all were heavily armed with guns and knives. The most Ludwig had was a single knife in his pocket.

Feliciano smirked at them all, though his gaze rested on Ludwig. Ludwig could see the wild anger in his eyes. Lovino's betrayal had hurt him more than he let on. He knew he was vulnerable but he was determined to show he was stronger and that he would get his revenge.

A silence fell over them. It was the lull before a battle. Ludwig, and everyone else, knew that this battle would be a battle unlike any other. This war would end tonight; though no one knew who would succeed. No one knew if anyone else would be lost in the fight. No one knew whose blood would stain the ground.

Though Feliciano's side had better weapons and the element of surprise, Ludwig's side had a stronger alliance, and something Feliciano's side didn't have.

They had four guardian angels watching over them.

~/~

**A/N:** Please review! The more reviews this gets, the faster I work. ^^ Thank you again to my amazing beta reader, The-Last-Dragon on dA, or WGDWriter on FanFiction.


	35. Chapter 35

Lost. Chapter 35 

A/N: Sorry this took so long again. Dx Thanks so much for all the reviews! :D You guys are awesome! :D There's only three more chapters left. I may be able to squeeze in a fourth. Dx I do have plans for a sequel though. Also, I made a blog for this fanfiction. The link is on my profile. Thanks again to my wonderful beta! :D

_I hate feeling like this_

_I'm so tired of trying to fight this_

_I'm asleep and all I dream of_

_Is waking to you_

_Tell me that you will listen_

_Your touch is what I'm missing_

_And the more I hide I realize I'm slowly losing you_

_Comatose_

_I'll never wake up without an overdose of you_

_I don't wanna live_

_I don't wanna breathe_

_'les I feel you next to me_

_you take the pain I feel_

_waking up to you never felt so real_

_I don't wanna sleep_

_I don't wanna dream_

_'cause my dreams don't comfort me_

_The way you make me feel_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

_I hate living without you_

_Dead wrong to ever doubt you_

_But my demons lay in waiting_

_Tempting me away_

_Oh how I adore you_

_Oh how I thirst for you_

_Oh how I need you_

_Comatose_

_I'll never wake up without an overdose of you_

_I don't wanna live_

_I don't wanna breathe_

_'les I feel you next to me_

_you take the pain I feel_

_waking up to you never felt so real_

_I don't wanna sleep_

_I don't wanna dream_

_'cause my dreams don't comfort me_

_The way you make me feel_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

_Breathing life_

_Waking up_

_My eyes open up_

_Comatose_

_I'll never wake up without an overdose of you_

_I don't wanna live_

_I don't wanna breathe_

_'les I feel you next to me_

_you take the pain I feel_

_waking up to you never felt so real_

_I don't wanna sleep_

_I don't wanna dream_

_'cause my dreams don't comfort me_

_The way you make me feel_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

_Oh how I adore you_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

_Oh how I thirst for you_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

_Oh how I adore you, ohhhh_

_The way you make me feel_

_Waking up to you never felt so real_

Comatose by Skillet

~/~

A clap of thunder signaled the start of the fight. Thunder illuminated the figures in front of each other. Lightning silhouetted their figures against the darkness as lightning split the sky. Feliciano was the first to advance, heading straight for Ludwig. Following their leaders move, Feliciano's allies charged forth, each with their own target in mind.

Ludwig braced himself for Feliciano's blow. All thoughts of making Feliciano pay for what he did to Gilbert vanished in thin air. It was easier to say he was going to do it than to actually do it. Feliciano had been his best friend. Feliciano might be able to kill Ludwig, but Ludwig wasn't sure if he could be able to hurt Feliciano.

Oddly, Feliciano stopped in front of him, brown eyes glinting in the moonlight. "So you only have a knife?" he observed with a curt laugh. He returned his sword to its sheath and retrieved a knife similar to Ludwig's. "It'd be no fun to beat you at an unfair fight!" he smirked.

Ludwig wanted to plead with Feliciano; this felt so wrong! He shouldn't be fighting Feliciano. He could tell Feliciano was getting desperate. His eyes, though sharp with anger, was hiding the hurt of Lovino's betrayal. He had lost almost all the people he used to hold dear. At least he still had his allies though. It was his own fault, but Ludwig couldn't deny that he felt bad for the Italian. He understood the pain he must feel.

His path had gone astray as much as Ludwig's had during World War II. Every country makes bad decisions during their existence. Ludwig's had been World War II. Yet Feliciano hadn't been afraid of him when he should have been. He had hurt Feliciano too, after all. Feliciano may have been forced to leave him due to his boss, but he had come back to help him during his hardships. The Feliciano here was not the Feliciano he knew. His Feliciano was just lost inside a monster.

Feliciano made the first move. Ludwig blocked him, surprised by his force. Feliciano had never been good at training, yet he must have been with holding his true strength. The force behind his blow was impressive.

Fighting was not what it seemed to be in movies. There were no flips, or fancy turns, or any other choreographed moves. This was real; this was life or death. One wrong move and one of them could lose their life. They wouldn't get any extra lives for being fancy.

Feliciano steadily advance on Ludwig, metal clashing on metal. Ludwig winced as the knife cut his hands. It was dark out, but some of the moon's light that filtered through the clouds reflected on the knives, making it easier to see. Thunder boomed around them, drowning out the sounds of metal striking metal. Pandemonium surrounded them in chaos, engulfing them in the clamor or the clash of knives.

Ludwig quickly began to get out of breath. Feliciano seemed to be relentless; constantly advancing and constantly trying to land a blow on Ludwig. Ludwig's hands were cut up badly. Blood mixed with rain and began to drip from his arm. He couldn't feel the pain anymore. Adrenaline was pumping through his veins, protecting him from the sting of the wounds.

Ludwig couldn't make a move to hurt Feliciano. In his head, he could see Gilbert's body lying still, sword protruding from his stomach. He knew what Feliciano was capable, and he was furious. His older brother was dead because of him. But at the same time, he couldn't bear to see Feliciano with his knife embedded in his chest. He couldn't stand the thought of him being the one to end Feliciano's life. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he still loved the Italian despite all the pain he caused him and everyone else.

"Feli, please!" he begged him. His breath was heavy and his voice was deeper than usual. His eyes looked into Feliciano's pleadingly. For once, he noticed that Feliciano's eyes were open. He hadn't kept them closed as he used to do. Seeing this caused a sharp pain in Ludwig's chest. He had like it when Feliciano's eyes were closed. He didn't want him to see the hardships and miseries. He wanted him to feel how good things were. It was just more proof of how Feliciano had changed, "Just stop this! It's not too late! Please, I don't want to hurt you! More lives don't need to be lost!" he begged.

"Don't call me by your little pet name! I'm not your 'Feli'!" he snapped angrily. He attempted another hard blow at Ludwig and managed to cut his arm. Ludwig winced lightly and pulled back. "And I worked too hard to abandon this now! You don't know how much pain you put me through all those years!" he snapped, voice cracking slightly.

Ludwig's eyes softened sympathetically, "Feli, I understand it now; I understand how I hurt you. I'm sorry, but that is no excuse for you to do the things you did. They didn't deserve to die...Alfred, Ivan, Kiku, Gilbert. What did they do to you that was so horrible that they deserved death? Don't you think that this has gone far enough? You took everyone I loved from me; first you, then Kiku and then my own brother."

Ludwig's voice grew more and more desperate, more tears mixed with the rain. He could not contain the sob that tore past his throat. Feliciano's fighting slowed until he came to a stop. He looked at Ludwig, shocked. He had never seen Ludwig cry. They stood facing each other, surrounded by a bloody battle, the only stillness in the fight. Ludwig didn't hear it though. All of his concentration was on Feliciano.

Blue eyes rose from the muddy ground to look at the brown eyes in front of him. "Can't you see?" he pleaded, his voice dropping. He had reached his wits end. Saying those words aloud made him truly realize that he was alone; that all of his best friends, and his own brother were gone.

Feliciano was silent as he watched Ludwig. Slowly, he lost his fighting stance and his body became relaxed. He watched Ludwig, a confusion of emotions taking over his eyes.

"Couldn't you see how I loved you?" Ludwig whispered. "I..." Ludwig trailed off. Blonde eyebrows knitted together. He had to find the perfect way to tell him. "I know I'm not good with emotion, but I loved you, Feliciano. Everyone else could see it. Why couldn't you?"

Feliciano's eyes watered with his words. Ludwig could tell he was battling with what he felt was right for him to do. He had felt hurt because of Ludwig, yet Ludwig's words were so sincere. His reaction encouraged Ludwig to spill everything. He had nothing left to lose for he had already lost it all.

"You were my best friend, Feli. You gave me my first real friend in a long time. You made me feel things I hadn't felt in a very long time. You made me feel...like I wasn't alone." Ludwig whispered. Tentatively, he took a step towards Feliciano. Feliciano looked down, unable to meet his gaze. Ludwig wasn't sure if it was tears, or rain that was dripping from his face. He dropped his knife to the ground, looking at Feliciano's face as it splashed in the mud.

"Then you took that all away." Suddenly, he charged into Feliciano, pinning him to the muddy ground. He quickly straddled the Italian's waist with his hips and held his arms above his head. He peered close to his face, piercing blue eyes penetrating wide, brown eyes.

"You betrayed me! You kidnapped me! You beat me and you changed everything. All the good things you made me feel we're suddenly a lie! All the good things you made me feel we're gone!" Ludwig spat angrily. All his pent up anger and grief was let loose. Feliciano's eyes hardened at his words. He wiggled from under the German, trying to free himself, but Ludwig wouldn't let him up.

Feliciano tried frantically to get out. He turned his head, looking for his allies. "Help!" he yelled. "Peter!" he exclaimed. Ludwig winced. Hearing Feliciano cry for help reminded him of old times, except Feliciano was calling for Peter instead, not him.

Peter glanced at Feliciano but barely gave him any time. Anger filled his eyes as he saw Ludwig straddling the one he claimed to be his lover and his leader. Feliciano fell still in shock. His eyes filled with hurt that he didn't bother to cover.

"Mattie!" he cried, turning to look to Canada who was locked in a battle with Arthur. He didn't even acknowledge him other that the quick wave of his hand. Feliciano desperately turned to the Baltics, his desperation rising.

"Lithuania?" he cried. Of course, he got no reply. "Latvia? Estonia?" he asked. No reply from either of them. He fell still in Ludwig's grip, mouth slightly parted and eyes wide. He had built everything up around them. He had done things for them to help them get revenge. But when he needed them, they ignored him. Peter, the one who he had thought was his lover had ignored him. Mattie, whom he had been good friends with, ignored him along with the Baltic's. The only people he had trusted and had let into his plot had betrayed it. The pain was evident in his face.

Like Germany, Feliciano was truly alone.

Ludwig saw his weakness and pressed on, hoping to make him see, "You killed Kiku! You killed our friend! He wouldn't do a single thing to hurt you, yet you caused his death. Yes, his death was unintentional, but my brother's wasn't!" Ludwig had to pause to regain control of himself. He didn't want to yell at Feliciano. His breath came out as heavy gasps. Tears freely ran down his face. The rain pelted down on them mercilessly. He lowered his voice again, "You killed him..." Ludwig whispered, "You had an unfair advantage. You know that he had no chance! You knew, yet you killed him anyway!" Ludwig cried out. Feliciano angled his chin upwards and looked into his eyes, brown eyes sharp.

"You knew he had no chance," Feliciano whispered, venomously, "Yet you left him. You left your own brother to die."

A silence drew between the two. Feliciano's words sunk into Ludwig. As much as he hated to admit it, his words were true. He had left his own brother to die. He didn't have to listen to him. He could have stayed and fought by his side. They could have fought Feliciano together. Then Gilbert wouldn't have had to die. But because he chose the easy way out, his brother had paid the ultimate price.

Feliciano took advantage of his vulnerability. He thrust into his chest with all his might and pushed Ludwig off of him. Ludwig lost his balance and fell onto his back, stunned. Feliciano scrambled to his feet, grabbing the knife he had dropped.

Ludwig wasn't sure of what was happening. It was all happening so quickly. First he was getting through to Feli, then he angered him, and now Feliciano had turned on him yet again. However, Ludwig couldn't feel the pain anymore. His body felt numb. Ludwig didn't feel the will to fight anymore. His best friends were dead or hated him, and his brother was murdered by his old best friend. Without them, he didn't feel the need to continue fighting.

He simply lay on his back as Feliciano rushed toward him, knife bared, eyes hard with the intent to kill, and frown on his face. All of his anger towards his back stabbing allies was aimed at Ludwig. Ludwig closed his eyes, sending up a silent prayer as he waited for death.

'I wonder if I'll see Gilbert?' he wondered to himself. He often wondered if countries went to the same place humans went to when they died. He hoped they did. Then he wouldn't be alone anymore; he'd be with Kiku and Gilbert again.

Ludwig heard a second pair of footsteps racing towards him. Ludwig opened his eyes as the footsteps halted. Lovino was standing in front of him, arms outstretched in a defensive stance. In front of him, Feliciano's eyes were wide and his body trembling.

"No..." Feliciano whispered.

Lovino let out a weak groan and collapsed to his knees, his body slumping. It was then that Ludwig put two and two together. Ludwig's eyes widened. He couldn't believe what had just happened! Lovino had tried to protect him! Lovino, the one who always voiced his hatred for Ludwig had saved his life. He had blocked Ludwig's body with his own, taking Feliciano's blow. Ludwig was behind him and couldn't see the damage, but he knew one thing was for sure...

Feliciano had stabbed his own brother.


	36. Chapter 36

Lost. Ch. 36

A/N: Wow! Thank you all for all the reviews! I really appreciate them all! My goal is to get to 300 reviews by the time the story ends. I'm so sorry for such a late reply, as usual. The end of the school year has been crazy. I've started volunteering with cats, I have an AP test and finals to study for, and I've been accepted into the National Honor Society, and along with all of that and some personal stuff, I haven't been able to write as much. I'll fix that, I promise!

~/~

Dare me to jump off of this Jersey bridge

I bet you never had a Friday night like this

Keep it up keep it up let's raise our hands

I take a look up in the sky and I see red

Red for the cancer, red for the wealthy, Red for the drink that's mixed with suicide.

Everything red.

Please, won't you push me for the last time,

Let's scream until there's nothing left

So sick of playing, I don't want this anymore.

The thought of you is no fucking fun.

You want a martyr, I'll be one

Because enough's enough,

We're done.

You told me, "think about it" Well I did,

Now I don't wanna feel a thing anymore

I'm tired of begging for the things that I want,

I'm over sleeping like a dog on the floor.

The thing I think I love

Will surely bring me pain

Intoxication, paranoia, and a lot of fame

Three cheers for throwing up

Pubescent drama queen

You make me sick,

I make it worse by drinking late.

Until there's nothing left

So sick of playing, I don't want to anymore

The thought of you is no fucking fun

You want a martyr I'll be one

Because enough's enough we're done

You told me, "think about it", well I did

Now I don't wanna feel a thing anymore

I'm tired of begging for the things that I want

I'm over sleeping like a dog on the floor.

Imagine living like a king someday.

A single night without a ghost in the walls.

And if the bass shakes the earth underground.

We'll start a new revolution NOW!

(Alright here we go)

Hail Mary, forgive me

Blood for blood,

Hearts beating

Come at me,

Now this is war

Fuck with this new beat

Terror begins inside a bloodless vein

I was just a product of the street youth rage

Born in this world without a voice or say

Caught in the spokes with an abandoned brain

I know you well, but this ain't a game

Blow the smoke in a diamond shape

Dying is a gift so,

Close your eyes and rest in peace

You told me, "think about it", well I did

Now I don't wanna feel a thing anymore

I'm tired of begging for the things that I want

I'm over sleeping like a dog on the floor.

Imagine living like a king someday.

A single night without a ghost in the walls.

We are the shadows screaming take us now

We'd rather die than live to rust on the ground. Shit

King for a Day by Pierce the Veil

~/~

Arthur had envisioned the final fight so many times, praying that it would come so this whole ordeal could just stop. However, of all the versions he had envisioned, he would have never guessed it would come to end like this.

Feliciano gave the order to fight, and he and his allies sprang forward, eager to fight for what they thought was revenge for their 'terrible' treatment. Each person on the other side had their own target in mind. Unfortunately, Arthur was targeted by not one, but two people. Peter and Matthew ran towards him. Arthur was not afraid. It was their last stand. This could make or break them. With adrenaline coursing through his veins, he drew his sword from his sheath.

The rest of the world seemed to fade away. Everyone else disappeared except for Matthew and Peter, two of his closest family members. With Alfred dead, and Francis kidnapped, he was alone. But he knew he could get Francis back if he was ok, that is. He didn't want to think about anything bad happening to his Francis. He was all he had now, he needed Francis. Francis had been there for him when he needed someone. He had been there for him when he was all alone. He wanted to be there for Francis in return. He wanted to free the Frenchman who had filled the whole in his heart.

However, Matthew and Peter outnumbered Arthur two to one. There was no way that Arthur would win. They had improved their skills in the short amount of time they had been with Feliciano. Arthur frowned and welded his sword in preparation for the fight. Suddenly, a blur dashed in to Arthur's side, blocking Matthew's sword before it would strike Arthur. Arthur blinked in surprise, blocking Peter's sword.

Whipping his head to the side, his eyes widened as he saw Antonio who had come to his assistance, "Antonio!" he exclaimed in shock.

Antonio smiled at the Briton, "Need some help, amigo?" he asked, shoving Matthew back. Arthur smirked and pushed Peter back. Arthur smiled at him and focused on his fight with Peter.

Peter scowled at him, "Hey! That's not fair!" he exclaimed. Arthur frowned at him and shook his head.

"Peter, just stop this. You don't have to fight if you stop. The bad guys never win, and I don't want to see you get hurt." he frowned. He defended himself from another attack from Peter. He was surprised by the strength that the young boy welded. He didn't know someone his side could possess such strength.

"Never!" Peter scowled at him, "I'm happy here! I have someone who cares for me, who acknowledges me as a country!" he exclaimed, his eyes darkening with passion and anger, "Something you never did! Why would I go back to that when I have all I ever wanted here! You're just afraid that you'll lose! Face it! You've lost a majority on your team!"

Arthur could not help but wince at his words. It was true. They had lost so many team mates. Alfred, Ivan, Kiku, and now Gilbert. Not to mention how Francis was kidnapped. He couldn't deny that they were at a disadvantage and that they were underdogs.

Peter smirked, seeing how his words affected the older man. He aimed another attack, forcing the Brit to back up several steps. Arthur frowned. He couldn't let himself be beaten back by a boy half his size. He advanced forward, taking aim with the skill and swiftness of a pirate. His pirate days seem to rush forth, and as it did, so did his sword.

Peter struggle to keep his ground but he was forced to back up, or to receive several slashes to his arms. The boy whimpered in pain as the knife created a cut along his forearm. The boy might be strong physically, but he was still a boy and handled pain as a young boy would.

A smile graced Arthur's features for the first time in a while. He knew this could work in their favor. While the enemy had gotten stronger, they all had an Achilles heel. The key to defeating them was finding it. Peters Achilles heel may not be his heel, or his handle of pain, but there had to be something bigger.

After all, why had he gotten himself in this situation?

Peter's eyes darkened in anger. He refused to let the older man beat him. He might be shorter, younger, and not as skilled as the other, but he could win. He was confident of it, and he wasn't going to let himself give up. He was as stubborn as a bull and was determined to show Feliciano that he could count on the young boy.

Peter began to vigorously fight back. Fiercely striking back with his sword, the two locked themselves in a brutal battle. The adrenaline coursed through their blood. They barely knew that they were being hurt, for they did not feel the sting of the sword and the rain pelting down on them washed the blood away.

It was a fury of fighting all around. Arthur was only barely aware of the other fights. He could hear Ludwig pleading with Feliciano, and Feliciano arguing back. He could hear the sounds of the fights from the Baltic's with Austria, Hungary, China and Taiwan. He could hear the occasional comment from Matthew or Antonio talking smack.

Throughout the whole fight, the rain continued to pelt down on the nations. It had no mercy; not caring if some of them were cold and exhausted, trenching everyone in cold water.

Arthur tossed his hair, whipping water away from his face. Peter and Arthur's fight lulled. They both stood staring at each other, their chests sharply rising and falling as they sucked in air to relieve their lungs.

"You've gotten good, Peter." Arthur said, a hint of a smile, though not out of animosity. He had always thought the boy was helpless. Even though he had already fought a civil war, he had assumed that the boy was unable to fight or defend himself because of his small size and young age. However, the boy had proved him wrong. He was impressed.

Peter smirked, "And you're the same, old man." he said. His eyes darkened with anger, "Maybe you even got worse. What's wrong? Are you missing your precious Francis?"

Arthur froze at the mention of his name, though he kept his facial expression neutral. He didn't want Peter to see how much he missed the Frenchman or how much of a toll it was on him. However, despite his attempts Peter seemed to know.

"I tried to stop them." he said. "I didn't want them to do that to Francis. I didn't want them to do that to them." he taunted, smirking at the British man. Dread clutched Arthur's heart, making it hard for him to breathe.

"What did you do to him?" he asked, his voice just barely over a whisper. He watched as Peter's smile grew ever so slightly.

"I didn't do it." he smirked, "It was Feliciano. I can't tell you what happened to him, but if you live, and if Francis is still alive, you'll find out for yourself."

Arthur growled and flung himself at Peter, swinging his sword fiercely. "What did you do to him?!" he cried out, his tone irate. Emerald eyes darkened dangerously, and a frightened look came over Peter, but as soon as it was there, the look disappeared and was replaced by a look of mockery.

"What? You didn't think we'd let him live, did you? Everyone you love dies. It's entirely your fault. If it wasn't for you, they could be safe, and they could still be alive. You killed them. You hurt them. Alfred's dead, Francis may be following him soon." Peter smirked, easily blocking Arthur's blows.

Feliciano's voice rang through the air mid fight. "Help! Peter!" he cried out. Arthur was surprised by the fear in his voice. He hadn't heard the Italian cry out for help since the fight began. Both stopped and turned their head. Peter was obviously surprised as well for his body stiffened, ready to abandon his fight with Arthur to help his 'lover'.

However, neither was expecting to see what they did.

Ludwig had Feliciano pinned to the ground. His larger hips straddled the Italians, keeping him from getting up, and he had the Italians hands pinned above his head. Feliciano was looking at Peter, his eyes wide with shock. His mouth was drawn in a frown, and his body wiggled and desperately tried to get free from Ludwig's hold.

Arthur glanced at Peter. The young boy's eyes looked at him and darkened. He quickly looked away from the Italian and aimed a blow towards Arthur. Not expecting him to ignore the one he claimed was his lover, Arthur was able to just barely block the attack.

Arthur heard the Italian call out the names of his other 'allies', but to his surprise, and the Italian's dismay, none of them came to aid him. Arthur looked to Peter, "Aren't you going to help your 'lover'?" he asked.

Peter's eyes filled with hatred and anger and quickly shoved the British man away with his sword. Arthur stumbled back a few feet as Peter continued to press forward, attacking him mercilessly with his sword, "I don't care about him. He's a traitor!" he hissed.

Arthur hissed in pain as the sword sliced his skin. He looked up to the boy, desperately trying to defend himself as the boy released his anger on him, "He needs help." he simply stated. He wanted Peter to go to aid Feliciano. He could easily get him to surrender if his guard was down. Ludwig could handle Feliciano. Despite all the German had been through, he was still the strongest in the group.

"Why would I help him? I should have known! He never loved me! He always loved that…that…bastard! He said he hated him, but we all knew." Peter growled out, tears pricking in his eyes.

Arthur suddenly realized what had happened. He had found Peter's Achilles Heel, "You thought he actually loved you?" he asked, "Why would he love you? You're just a boy. He only pretended to love you because he needed someone, anyone, to fill the hole in his heart that Ludwig left." he said. Peter began to fumble, and Arthur was able to push him back. The boy shook his head, droplets of water falling from his hair.

"N-no!" he stammered, "H-he…he…" he trailed off. The truth sunk in, and suddenly he stopped. Arthur froze, watching him closely with his sword aimed at the young boy. Peter's shoulders slumped and his head tilted down, "You're right." he whispered. He dropped his sword into the mud. He held up his hands, looking defeated, "I surrender." he said. Arthur relaxed and lowered his sword. He moved forward to grab the boy when a sudden quietness filled the air.

Arthur frowned and turned. His eyes widened at the sight before him, and he felt his stomach churn, like he was about to throw up. "No…" he whispered. He couldn't believe it. Lovino stood in front of Ludwig protectively, his arms stretched apart. However, Feliciano's knife was embedded in his stomach. Ludwig, Feliciano, and Lovino's eyes were wide in shock as neither of them could figure out why Lovino had thrown himself in front of Ludwig.

"No!" Antonio cried out, abandoning his fight and sprinting forward. Arthur winced at the raw pain and fear in his voice. He knew the pain all too well; the pain of seeing ones loved one die. Arthur winced as he remembered Alfred's death as he remembered Francis being kidnapped. He looked to the man who had started it all, Feliciano Vargas. His emerald eyes darkened with anger.

He craved to get revenge for all the pain Feliciano caused him and his loved ones. While Feliciano was still distracted by his brother he charged towards him. Feliciano was unaware that he was about to be slammed into. However, before Arthur slammed into Feliciano, someone else intercepted and ran into Arthur. Arthur lost his balance and crashed to the ground.

Arthur quickly scrambled up, his body tensing up in anticipation for a fight. However, the man didn't make a move. Arthur's eyes widened as he came face to face with Ludwig.

"You will not hurt Feliciano." he growled, roughly shoving Arthur into the ground. Arthur glared up at him, his anger flaring.

"Why are you protecting him? He killed Alfred! He killed Kiku and Gilbert, and attempted to kill you!" Arthur snapped at him. "Let it go! He needs to pay for what he did!"

Ludwig's gaze was steady as he shook his head, "You will not hurt Feliciano." he repeated, "We're not like that. I'm tired of losing people! I'm tired of people getting hurt. No one else will be hurt, understood?" he snapped firmly.

Arthur's eyes narrowed as he glared at him. He nodded quietly, unhappy with having to listen to the German.

"Lovino, please," Antonio said to him desperately, holding the Italian in his arms, trying to shield him from the rain with his body. With one arm wrapped around him, he held Lovino's hand with his. "Stay with me. Please, I need you. I love you so much, Lovino, so much." His voice cracked with emotion. He rocked the Italian's body ever so slightly, leaned down close and kissed the Italians forehead.

Arthur frowned seeing the two. He glanced at Feliciano and was surprised by the look of horror as the Italian looked at his brother. He held up trembling hands and looked at them as if they were his own.

"I'm sorry…" he whispered, tears coursing down his cheek. He closed his eyes and shook his head as if he couldn't believe what had happened, as if he couldn't believe what he had done, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He cried, a sob escaping his lips. Ludwig stood up and approached the Italian quietly. He didn't know how stable he was, he didn't know what Feliciano would do, and he didn't want to take any chances.

"Feliciano, stop fighting. It's over now." he murmured quietly, "Just surrender and this will all be over. No one needs to get hurt anymore. You got your revenge."

Feliciano looked up. He looked so much like his old self, teary eyed and helpless. He shook his head, "No," he said. Ludwig tensed, ready for another fight. However, Feliciano made no motion towards him. "It's not over. I…I caused all of this." He whispered. He glanced down, his hands trembling. He pulled an object from his pocket and looked up, his gaze meeting Ludwig's eyes.

Ludwig's eyes widened, "Feliciano, no!" he exclaimed. He was too late though. The gun was aimed, and a loud boom filled the silence…


	37. Chapter 37- Final Chapter

Lost. Ch. 37

_If you want to live, let live._

_If you want to go, let go._

_I'm not afraid to dream, to sleep, sleep forever._

_I don't need to touch the sky._

_I just want to feel that high, _

_And you refuse to lift me._

_Guess it wasn't real after all._

_Guess it wasn't real all along._

_If I fall and all is lost,_

_It's where I belong._

_If you want to live, let live._

_If you want to go, let go._

_I'm never gonna be your sweet, sweet surrender._

_Guess it wasn't real after all._

_Guess it wasn't real all along._

_If I fall and all is lost,_

_No light to lead the way,_

_Remember that all alone is where I belong._

_In a dream,_

_Will you give your love to me?_

_Beg my broken heart to beat,_

_Save my life, change my mind._

_If I fall and all is lost._

_No light to lead the way._

_Remember that all alone is where I belong._

Cloud Nine by Evanescence

~/~

As soon as Ludwig realized what Lovino had done, he quickly rose to meet him as his knees crumbled. He wrapped his arms around the Italian and gently lowered him to the ground, settling him on his lap. Ignoring what Feliciano was quietly murmuring to himself, Ludwig tried to make Lovino comfortable and shield him from the rain that pelted down on them.

"Lovino!" Antonio's heartbroken scream split the air. Everyone seemed to stop what they were doing to watch. Antonio abandoned his fight as he sprinted to his lover, tears streaking his face.

A weak groan escaped Lovino's lips. Ludwig couldn't help but realize this could be the second time someone died because of him that night. Ludwig's eyes trailed down his body to see the knife jutting out from his stomach, Ludwig's face rose to look at Lovino's. He did not want to see the knife that was almost in the same spot as his brothers. He did not want to see the knife that would take Lovino's life.

"I-I didn't mean to!" Feliciano whimpered behind them. Ludwig didn't turn around to see him. He could tell from his voice that Feliciano was shocked and heart broken. "Lovi..."

Ludwig ignored him. He looked to Lovino, to the man who openly expressed his hatred for him, who criticized everything he did, who had suffered so much hardship because of Feliciano, and now, the man who sacrificed his life to protect Ludwig.

But with his sacrifice, he just might have saved his brother. Feliciano didn't look like he could hurt anyone else. The one person he hadn't planned to die could be dying.

Ludwig was shocked into silence. What could he say? He silently looked down at the Italian, his blue eyes wide in shock. The Italian looked up at him, for once, not an angered expression on his face. He looked surprisingly at peace. His honey colored eyes met Ludwig's eyes and a small smile tugged at his pale lips.

By this time, Antonio had reached them. Ludwig willingly gave Lovino to Antonio. Antonio wrapped his arms around his lover, rocking him gently and hunching his back to press his forehead to Lovino's.

"No!" he begged, "Please no! Lovino, don't leave! Stay here! Stay here with me, amore." he sobbed, gently stroking Lovino's cheek with his hand. Lovino lifted a hand and gripped Antonio's shirt as if he was trying to root himself to something. He looked to Antonio's eyes, his breathing getting labored. He did not reply, only looked up at Antonio, his eyes saying all that needed to be said.

The sound of feet sprinting through the soaked ground interrupted Ludwig's thoughts. Azure eyes looked up to see Arthur charging towards Feliciano, who was still staring at his brother in shock.

Ludwig quickly jumped to his feet and intercepted Arthur before he could run into Feliciano. The force of his blow caused Arthur and him to fall into the dirty mud. Immediately, Arthur scrambled to get to his feet, as if anticipating for that person to attack him. With all that had happened, Ludwig didn't blame him for being cautious. Sky blue met emerald green eyes. Arthur seemed to relax seeing that it was Ludwig but a confused look replaced his relieved expression.

Ludwig scowled at him, "You will not hurt Feliciano." he hissed at him dangerously. Despite all that Feliciano had done, this was the closest to the old Feliciano that Ludwig had seen. If there was a change that he could get his Feliciano back, he didn't want to risk it. There didn't need to be any more blood spilled. He was tired of death and didn't want to see anyone else die.

"Why are you protecting him?" Arthur snapped. His emerald eyes narrowed with fury. Ludwig couldn't blame him. He had suffered just as Ludwig had, if not more so. He had lost Alfred, Peter had betrayed him and Francis was taken from him. "He killed Alfred! He killed Kiku and Gilbert, and attempted to kill you! Let it go! He needs to pay for what he did!"

Ludwig simply shook his head. Despite what Feliciano had done, he couldn't let any harm come to the youngest Italian. Indeed, he would pay, but not by death. "You will not hurt Feliciano," he repeated, "We're not like that. I'm tired of losing people. I'm tired of people getting hurt. No one else will be hurt, understood?" he snapped firmly.

Arthur glared at him and fell silent for a moment. Ludwig tensed, half expecting him to try something else. After a few moments, he nodded quietly, a sour expression on his face.

"Lovino, please." Antonio said. Ludwig frowned and turned his attention back to the two. He felt a thorn pierce his heart seeing the two; Antonio desperately holding the oldest Italian in his arms, rocking him gently and trying to shield him from the steady rain. Clutching Lovino's hand, Antonio looked down at him, tears coursing down his cheeks, "Stay with me. Please, I need you. I love you so much, Lovino, so much." Ludwig winced at how Antonio's voice cracked. Antonio leaned down to press his lips to the Italian's forehead again.

Glancing up, Ludwig was shocked by the expression on Feliciano's face. A look of pure horror gripped his face. His body visibly trembled from shock. Ludwig was surprised. Lovino had previously been one of the few people who Feliciano still trusted and truly cared about. Feliciano didn't know that Lovino was spying on him. Ludwig had expected him to not be effected by accidentally stabbing him. He was surprised he hadn't purposely tried to kill him. But maybe this meant that Feliciano still cared. Maybe the old Feliciano could still come back...

Feliciano's gazed lowered to look at his hands. His hands trembled fervently and his chocolate eyes had a haunted look to them.

"I'm sorry..." Feliciano whispered, ignoring the tears that coursed down his cheeks. He closed his eyes and shook his head, as if to expel bad thoughts. His body shook like a leaf. Ludwig felt sympathy twinge at his heart. He knew then that the old Feliciano was back. He had nothing left. His allies had betrayed him and he had stabbed his brother, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

A sob broke past Feliciano's lips. He looked lower, his damp hair falling in front of his face. Ludwig quietly approached the Italian. He still wasn't sure how stable he was, even though he knew that his Feliciano was back. He didn't want to make him snap or do anything stupid.

"Feliciano, stop fighting. It's over now. Just surrender and this will all be over. No one needs to get hurt anymore," Ludwig said to him quietly, "You got your revenge."

Feliciano looked up and Ludwig was surprised by the look in his eyes. This was the old Feliciano that Ludwig knew. He looked so pitiful and helpless. Ludwig felt that old desire to protect the other man from harm. However, Ludwig couldn't save him this time. He couldn't take away the things that Feliciano did. Feliciano would have to take his punishment.

Feliciano shook his head quietly, "No," he said, his voice dull and void of life or hope, "It's not over. I...I caused all of this." he whispered. His voice cracked. Ludwig could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. Feliciano knew what he did was wrong, he was done fighting. Everything was finally going to end and things could start to go back to the way they were before.

The faces of all those who had died passed in front of Ludwig's eyes. Even though this was finally ending, those people could never come back. Ludwig's heart ached to see how many people passed before him. Too many had lost their life.

Ludwig took a step towards Feliciano, wanting to grab a hold of him so they could get out of the rain, so they could get out of this hell.

However, a movement caught his eye. Feliciano's hand drifted to his belt and grasped a handle. Lifting the object upwards, Ludwig saw the outline of a gun as lightning lit up the area. Silently, Feliciano took aim, a dead expression on his face. Ludwig's heart leaped into his throat and his body froze with fear.

"Feliciano, no!" Ludwig cried. He was cut off as a loud bang went through the air, though it was from a different direction. The nations jumped and looked behind them. Behind them stood Elizabetha holding a gun to the air, silence trailed between the nations before one of them spoke.

"Put the gun down, Feliciano. It's over now. There's no need for any more blood to be shed." Elizabetha sternly said. Ludwig glanced back to Feliciano. The younger Italian looked so defeated. His shoulders were slumped in defeat, his hair was slick over his head and his clothes clung to his trembling body, his eyes held a dull look to them, like he had given up on everything. Most of all, Feliciano had his own gun pointed towards his own head.

This could all be over. All the death and suffering could stop. They could all go home and try to live normally. But Feliciano did not want to let it rest. He had started it, and his idea of an end was only worse. Ludwig frowned. Lovino's words repeated in his head. Feliciano had been there for him after World War II. Feliciano had been his friend despite all the horrible things he did during the war. He treated him no differently and loved him the same.

Feliciano may have done horrible things, but he didn't deserve death.

Ludwig looked to Feliciano. The last battle really wasn't over. Except, this battle wasn't between Feliciano and most of the other countries; it was between Feliciano and himself. Not until Feliciano put the gun down would this finally be over. Ludwig looked calmly at the Italian though what he felt was not calm. His insides felt frantic, felt desperate. He tried to look as calm as he could. He had to calm Feliciano down. He didn't want to lose his best friend, "Feliciano, just put the gun down. Don't do this." he said quietly. He reached a hand out to him, pleading at him with his eyes, "Give me the gun, Feliciano."

Ludwig took a hesitant step to Feliciano. The Italian looked at him for a second, his eyes showing the confusion he felt. Ludwig could almost visibly see the wheels in his head turning. He was considering it. Feliciano's eyes glanced to Lovino who was still in Antonio's arms. He was still alive and fighting.

"Feliciano, Lovino's alive. He needs you to help him; he needs his brother." Ludwig whispered softly. "If you give up on yourself, you give up on him too."

Feliciano shook his head, clicking the safety off of the gun. A tear streamed from his eyes, "No," he whispered, his voice dull and lifeless, "He's better off without me; you all are. I did...I did terrible things. I thought terrible things, wanted to do more terrible things. I'm a monster; I don't deserve life."

"Wait!" Arthur exclaimed, stepping closer. Ludwig looked towards him quickly. Was Arthur trying to help him? Ludwig smiled slightly. If Arthur could forgive him, Feliciano might not do it. He might see that others forgave him, "Before you kill yourself, tell me where Francis is! Is he still alive?"

Ludwig was shocked at the Englishman's question. He understood he wanted to get Francis back, but he wasn't helping Feliciano. If anything, he was doing the opposite. He looked to Feliciano who looked to Arthur.

"He's alive. Antonio knows where he is; he will take you to him," he said. He looked at Arthur and frowned, "I'm sorry."

He looked to the group, from Arthur, to Ludwig, to Antonio and Lovino, to Yao and Mei, to Roderick and Elizabetha, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I did, and for what I caused. I hope you can eventually forgive me and remember the good times we had, but I'm sorry for hurting you and your loved ones." he whispered. He glanced to his brother one more time, waiting to make sure he was still breathing. He had passed out; the pain had been too much and he had lost a lot of blood, but he was still breathing.

"Feliciano, no! Don't do this! We can work something out!" Ludwig exclaimed. Feliciano looked to Ludwig, his old best friend, one of the people he had hurt the most, "Ja, what you did was terrible, but we've all done terrible things. We can get past this and move on! There are other ways to punish yourself!"

Feliciano looked at Ludwig, smiling bitterly, "Ludwig, you were my closest friend. I was so blind...so blind. I didn't see. I didn't see anything. But now you don't see." Tears continued to streak down his face in steady streams, mixing with the rain that pelted them, "I can't live with myself. No punishment you could give me would be enough for what I did. Nothing will ever make up for the pain I caused. I just...I just hoped that by doing this, I can give some people the satisfaction they want and get the...the revenge that they want. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for hurting you all, and I'm sorry for everything I have done. I don't want to trouble you by making you guys take my body. Just leave me here; it's what I deserve. Get attention for Lovi, please, and I hope you can all move on and have a good life."

Feliciano closed his eyes, falling silent. His hand that grasped the gun trembled. Ludwig's eyes widened. "Feliciano!" he cried. For a moment, all the good times they had shared together flashed before his eyes; finding Feliciano in a box during WWI, forming an alliance, training, going for gelato or pizza together, Feliciano making pasta for him after a long day of work, Feliciano somehow always managing to sneak into his bed at night. All these memories and more flooded his head. This was Feliciano, not the monster who killed, not the broken man about to shoot himself. He didn't want to lose him, "No!" he cried.

He raced towards him, heart beating furiously against his rib cage. The world seemed to go into slow motion. He ran towards him slowly, he could see Feliciano's finger curling around the trigger. He screamed Feliciano's name again, just as a loud bang split the air and the bullet left the cartage. A dull grunt escaped Feliciano's lips as his head leaned back. His knees crumpled underneath him and his body began to fall.

Ludwig quickly made it to his side. Time returned to its usual speed. He wrapped his arms around Feliciano as he fell and gently lowered him into his lap.

"Feli!" Ludwig screamed. "Feliciano, don't you dare die!" Blood was quickly running from the hole on the side of his head. His skin was pale and his eyes were lightly closed. Ludwig gently slapped his cheek, "Wake up!" he sobbed.

He heard footsteps racing close to him. Roderick and Elizabetha crouched by his side. He couldn't hear what they were saying; he could only focus on Feliciano. Even with the rain falling on him, the blood continued to flow from the wound in his head in a thick, red stream. He brushed his wet hair from his face, leaning over him and struggling to control himself.

First Kiku, then Gilbert, and now Feliciano. Even though Feliciano had caused it all, he was still his friend deep down and he was still his Feliciano. As Ludwig had hoped, the monster had released its grip from him, but at the same time, Feliciano had released his desire to live.

"Damn it, Feliciano," he whispered, "Why did you have to die?"

He was barely aware that Roderick put his index finger to Feliciano's neck, checking for a pulse. Ludwig knew it was useless. Barely anyone survived from a gunshot wound to the head, especially at such close range. It wasn't impossible, but the chance of someone surviving such a wound was slim to none.

"It's no use," he muttered, his voice tired and defeated, "He's gone. It's over."

"No," Roderick said, his eyes wide in shock, "It's not. He's losing too much blood! We have to hurry and get him and Romano out of here! He has a pulse!"

~\\~

A/N: Cliff hanger until the next book! Thank you all for hanging with me through this! Please review! I would love to know your opinions of my book and of the plot, or anything else you may want to say. For those reading this on fanfiction, I will be changing my username to my deviantArt name of xXSmokeNMirrorsXx and the story will be called To Be Found. To those reading this on dA, I will be posting this on my 'new' dA, xXSmokeNMirrorsXx. Again, thank you all so much and thank you to my wonderful beta (please visit her link in my profile). Again, please let me know your opinions and what not! Until the next time, friends! ^^


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